


TB

by Schmoran



Category: Other - Fandom
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-09
Updated: 2017-01-19
Packaged: 2018-09-15 21:32:03
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 19
Words: 118,693
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9258110
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Schmoran/pseuds/Schmoran





	1. Chapter 1

When Harry Styles was approached to become the next Bachelor, his immediate reaction was to scoff. He already had everything going for him—money, looks, an active sex life, the adoration of many. Marriage was something far from his mind, and at twenty-five years old he felt he was too young to settle down anyway. He immediately turned it down but the idea floated around in his head like a ghost for days, appearing from behind a door when least expected to jolt him into letting his mind get carried away with visions of a mass of men all vying for his attention. He discussed it with his stylist and best friend, Lou, who encouraged the idea rather than ridicule it, reminding Harry that it would be more exposure and that he didn't _have_ to marry anyone at the end of it; he could simply enjoy the game, watching the contestants cut each other down while fighting over him and treating him like a god.

He also liked the thought of being the first gay Bachelor; his bisexuality was common knowledge, not something he'd ever felt the need to hide, and because he lived in the world of fashion it was never something to be shunned for. There were more gay models than straight as it was, so he fit right in. When Lou also mentioned he'd forever be remembered as the first man to participate in a gay season of the show, the ghost in his mind became less transparent and more solid, a harder obstacle to simply wave away when he wanted to.

After three days of tossing it around in his head, Harry knew this was something he wanted to do, but still he held back. He was the male model most in demand around the world, and he'd thrived on that for over a year but lately the excitement wasn't as intense when his manager told him about new shows he'd been booked to do. When he discussed that with Lou, she cut right to the heart of the matter—as she always did.

"You're bored."

"What? I'm not bored," he'd argued. "I have everything I've ever wanted."

"Exactly. Nothing to work toward. You're bored, Harry."

"I am not." Glaring at Lou, Harry then turned his back on her to check an incoming text message.

"Whatever. But I think you should do it. You might just fall in love, you know."

Making a scoffing noise, Harry otherwise ignored her words to reply to the text. "I won't be home tonight. Ben wants to get together."

"Oh, great. Ben. King of the Assholes. Just make sure you use protection."

"What are you, my mother? I do what I want. And _who_ I want." Looking back with a wink, Harry added, "And I _always_ use protection."

"At least you're smart about that. What are you going to do without me when you have to move into the big Bachelor mansion?"

"I'm not doing the show, Lou." Lou only shrugged and said, "I'll let the house staff know we won't need them for the next few months."

"You won't be staying here?"

"I do have family, you know. I only live with you because you're lost without me."

"And because you love me."

"You're the brother I never had. Now go fuck Ben's brains out and get it out of your system, because once they sequester you, there won't be any dick for at least six weeks."

"Oh. Wow. That...maybe I shouldn't do it."

Sighing, Lou said, "Harry. Sit down."

He did, joining her on the lavish sofa. "Are you gonna lecture me?"

"You need someone in your life."

"Oh, here we go again."

"Someone who cares about you."

"You care about me."

"Someone who also makes you happy in bed."

"Ben makes me happy in bed."

"So do the twenty other guys you sleep with on a rotating basis. But there isn't one who does both—who loves you and who cherishes you the way you deserve to be cherished."

"Love is overrated, Lou. I couldn't stand to be tied down to one man."

"You haven't met the right man. Don't you ever want to have kids?"

"I thought we were talking about men, not women."

"Harry, you can adopt. Or if you'd rather take a wife, you can do that, too. But I think you prefer men. Women bore you."

"Lately everything bores me."

"Ha! See? I knew it. You're bored. Go take some time away, meet some nice guys who genuinely want to fall in love, and see where it takes you."

"But you said I should do this because it's good exposure, not to fall in love. You said I don't have to marry anyone."

"I said what I knew would get through to you. What I really want is to see you happily married to a man who is devoted to you, who brings out that side of you most people rarely see. You have a good heart, Harry. You just don't use it often."

"I learned a long time ago that having a heart is dangerous in this business. It's easier for you to be cut down."

"Fine. You buried your heart for years, now you're on top. Right where you wanted to be. Take some time for yourself, look around and see what else life has to offer. Imagine a tiny voice calling to you from the next room, saying 'Daddy!'"

Harry shuddered. "Stop that."

"You're wonderful Lux."

"That's cause she's cool."

"Harry," Lou sighed again. "Do this. If nothing else, enjoy thirty guys fighting over you. Just don't fuck them, I think that's against the rules until the last week or something."

Harry stood up as a text came in. "I'm not doing this. I gotta go. See you tomorrow."

"Just think about it, Harry. Waking up to the same man every day, one who smiles at you first thing, whose face lights up when he opens his eyes and sees you staring at him."

"Later, Lou!" Harry was moving toward the door.

"Little feet running in to jump on the bed and shake you, calling you 'daddy'!"

"Goodbye, Lou!" The door was open and he was stepping out.

"I'll let the staff know you're going!"

"Not happening!" he called back just before slamming it.

Three weeks later Harry was in a limo on the way to the house he would be living in for the next six weeks, about to become the first gay Bachelor.

* * *

When Liam Payne got the call that he'd been selected as a contestant on "The Bachelor," he wasn't overjoyed. He'd done it mostly to shut up his mother, who constantly hounded him to find a boyfriend and settle down.

While it was true Liam had been feeling loneliness creep up more and more at night, he had enough going on in his life that he was never truly dissatisfied with it. He lived in New York, the city that never stopped going, where excitement was around the corner at any time of the day or night. He owned five dogs who loved him more than enough, sharing his huge bed and keeping the loneliness at bay when he needed someone to cuddle with. His business was a roaring success, having grown from one little hot dog cart that took up residency near a courthouse to expanding into the chain of stands he owned now all over the state, and everyone knew if you wanted the best, you went with Payne's Dogs.

It wasn't like he needed money, nor did he need anything more to do with his time, so when his mother would call up and ask if he was seeing anyone, he would remind her of this, that he was busy and content with the dogs (of all kinds) that shaped his world.

He had never really expected to be chosen for the show. He'd watched a few episodes of it after his mother urged him to and found it ridiculous but highly entertaining. When she'd called in a flurry of excitement to tell him that the network was doing a gay Bachelor season, he'd laughed it off and swore he would never put himself in that sort of environment. His mother didn't back off, though, and he watched a few more episodes, thinking about what it would be like to have a gorgeous, successful man taking him on adventures and romantic dates. When he argued that he would never be chosen over what was sure to be a group of men more handsome than him, his mother scolded him for thinking so little of himself and assured him he was gorgeous with a heart of gold and if nothing else, he might meet a man on the show that would be worth knowing once it ended. "No one says you have to fall in love with the Bachelor himself, Liam. I bet there'll be a nice man looking for someone just like you."

It was that thought in his mind as he boarded the plane to Los Angeles. Could there be a man out there who wouldn't mind sharing a house with him and five dogs? Who wouldn't mind the dogs squeezing them out of bed as they made room for themselves and sometimes practically suffocated you in their need to be loved? Liam thought maybe he could make an exception, though, for a man who would love him the way he dreamed of being loved, who would understand him and accept his eccentricities, a man who would love him through the night but be just as content to lay in bed and talk, too-or play video games for hours, his guilty pleasure.

For a man like that, Liam left the comfort of his routine and flew into the unknown, his heart soaring in hope for the first time.

For a man like that, he would get the dogs a room of their own.

* * *

Niall hung up the phone with a pit deep in his stomach, wondering now what he'd been thinking applying to be a contestant on "The Bachelor." He had to sit down in a nearby chair, feeling his stomach cramp up as it always did when nerves assaulted him. Was he really going to leave Nola and fly to Los Angeles for six weeks on the mere chance he would find love and a suitable father for his angel?

Niall had no misconceptions about the show or the circus it would be. He'd watched for years, his wife getting hooked on it first and then slowly dragging Niall into the drama. They'd laughed together at the ridiculousness, questioning the sanity of people who would purposely put themselves in a situation like that, where you were fighting for the attention of a man (or woman, in the case of "The Bachelorette") who had the luxury of dating at least twenty others while making up his mind. While it was true that women did tend to be more dramatic than the men, Niall also knew that gay males could put females to shame in the drama department.

This was why he was currently fighting off a panic attack, a hand rubbing his face as he attempted to calm himself down. He'd read all the rules, knew he could leave at any time once the contest began, but it didn't help the notion that he was an idiot for even considering this, that it was a mistake to spend even one week away from Nola.

When the panic ratcheted up another notch, Niall stood and walked to his daughter's bedroom, peeking in at her sleeping soundly in her bed. She normally fought him on naps, though never in a way that tested his patience really, but today she'd gone without protest and Niall knew that meant she was coming down with the cold that had been going around her school. He worried again about leaving her, telling himself she would be fine in the care of his mother (who had of course been more than willing to help Niall find someone to love) but again the panic set in. What if she fell gravely ill and he wasn't here to take care of her? What if he said goodnight to her on the phone and woke up the next morning to the news she'd passed away?

Most would think him ridiculous to fret over a scenario like that, but those people hadn't watched it happened. Niall had lost his wife overnight, when a blood clot went straight to her brain and just like that, he was alone.

_Well, not alone._ He smiled now, watching Nola. He'd been terrified after losing his partner, alternately depressed and horrified at the prospect of raising a child on his own. She wasn't old enough to speak much at that point, but her cries for Mommy ripped into his heart and left him a shell of his former self, wondering what in the world made him think he could ever be a proper father.

What had kept him going then was what kept him going now, the need to provide and care for his child, who he loved above anything else in this world. He watched Nola's chest rise and fall under the bright yellow blanket, and suddenly he was overwhelmed with the need to touch her, to make sure she was real and not about to disappear.

Niall moved to the bed and settled on the edge of it, running a hand over her tangled hair (even at five she hated having her hair brushed) and brushing a thumb over her cheek. Yes, she was starting to feel feverish, and another wave of guilt washed over him. How could he even consider leaving her for six weeks?

Pale green eyes blinked up at him, the eyes of her mother that still squeezed Niall's heart. "Daddy?" she croaked.

_As if it would be anyone else._ "Hey, sweetheart. How you feeling?"

"I'm hot."

"Yeah, you're getting sick."

"Do I get popsicles?" she asked, waking up quickly at the notion.

"I think we can manage that," Niall chuckled. Nola loved the electrolyte-heavy freezer pops he plied her with when sick. "You want one now?"

"Yeah." She kicked off the covers, Niall standing to accommodate the movement, then she shivered. "Now I'm cold."

"I know. Come on, pumpkin." Niall scooped her up and carried her to the kitchen, waiting until she was done rubbing at her eyes to pass her the "treat."

"I want a red one."

"We don't have any more red ones. You ate them all."

"Nuh uh, there's red ones."

With an inner exasperated sigh Niall showed her the open box. After she perused it carefully, her bottom lip stuck out. "The store has red ones."

"Yes, but we're not going to the store. Green or purple, take your pick."

Nola hesitated as if that would make the red ones suddenly appear.

"Nola, we're letting all the cold air out. Green or purple?"

"Greeeeeeeen," she sighed, obviously preparing herself for the worst kind of torture.

"The green ones are good. They taste like apple. Or is it lime?" Niall returned the rest of the ice pops to the freezer and shut it. "You want to watch some cartoons?"

"Animals."

"Okay, we can do that." He deposited Nola gently on the couch before flipping the television to the wildlife channel, which never ceased to fascinate her. After joining her, he asked, "If I needed to take a trip for a little while, how would you feel about that?"

"Where you going?"

"To Los Angeles. It's a big city far away."

"Can I go?"

"No. Grandma would stay here with you."

"How come I can't go?"

"Because it's for grown-ups only."

"I want to go."

"I know, but you can't."

Nola thought it over, her tiny pink lips moving over the green ice, and finally asked, "Will Grandma play Candyland with me?"

"I'm sure she will."

"Okay then."

Niall chuckled, ruffling her hair and leaning down to place a kiss to the top of her head. Children could be so complicated, yet so simple at the same time. While it hadn't been easy raising Nola alone for the past three years, he'd never once regretted her.

"I'll be back," he said, standing up.

"You're leaving already?"

"No, honey, I just need to call Grandma. You doing okay?"

"I'm cold."

"Right." After propping her up and covering her with a nearby blanket, Niall smiled. She was sick, but she had a "popsicle" and animals; she was in heaven. "I love you, kiddo."

"Uh huh."

Chuckling again and leaving her to the lemurs, Niall stepped into the kitchen and called his mother, staring at the tiles that were peeling up from the floor and the pantry door that kept falling off because he couldn't afford a new one.

Yeah, the little girl in the next room was worth anything he might have to suffer in order to make sure she was taken care of.

* * *

Louis Tomlinson got the call when he was leaving a meeting with his head coach and general manager. It was with a heavy heart that he stepped out of the office, almost immediately regretting his decision and tempted to go back in and retract it, but the ringing of his phone from a Los Angeles area code distracted him. Having played for the L.A. Galaxy Soccer team for a number of years prior to his current team, the San Jose Earthquakes, he'd met and made a lot of friends in that area and it could only be someone he'd love talking to.

He was surprised to hear an unfamiliar voice on the line, a woman informing him he'd been selected as a contestant for "The Bachelor." His jaw dropped slightly as he listened to instructions and it became real, and by the time he was behind the wheel of his car and hanging up, his mouth had formed a huge smile.

Louis' fingers pulled up his mother's number next, and when she picked up he gushed, "Mom! The Bachelor people called! I'm doing it!"

"Are you serious? Honey, that's wonderful! I'm so excited for you!"

"I know, I can't believe it actually worked! I mean, it's probably only because of the Soccer, because I'm already a known entity and they figure I'll pull in ratings. But who cares? If I find love, I don't care why they chose me."

"Exactly. But you know it won't be easy. There will be a lot of catty behavior and you might even get your heart broken. That's my only fear for you, Louis."

"Yeah, I know. But like you said before, even if I don't end up with the Bachelor, I'll meet a lot of other guys looking for love. Hopefully normal guys who are sane. Oh, and can handle my schedule during the season."

"How did your meeting go?"

"As well as can be expected, I guess. They weren't happy that I'm sitting out the rest of the season, and it wasn't an easy decision for me, but I've already missed so much of it with this injury and it's gonna take me time to get back in shape. By the time that's done, the season will be over anyway."

"Unless you get to finals."

"Well...yeah. And now they're gonna think I did this just to do the show, but I do have a doctor's note with a recommendation for me to continue healing before trying to play again."

"I know you fought that at first, and I'm so glad you're taking the time off instead. Now you can try dating."

Louis sighed, chuckling. "That's what the show is for, Mom. If I can't find a good match in a group of thirty men looking for love, I might as well give up."

"No. Never give up. But I think you have a good chance." She hesitated, then said "I know you don't want to hear this, but I'm glad you got injured."

Eyebrows raised, Louis responded, "Mom, what the hell?"

"Wait, that came out wrong." His mother sighed and started again. "What I mean is I'm glad you were forced to take time to look around at your life. It showed you what's missing."

Louis was silent, unable to argue because his mother was right. It wasn't until he was stuck at home with nothing to do that he'd realized there was more to life than Soccer, because one day Soccer would end. What would he be left with then?

"You're lonely, aren't you?" she asked delicately.

"I wasn't," Louis argued half-heartedly. "Not until I stopped going long enough to really see things. In the off-season I keep so busy catching up with everyone and staying in shape and I just...never stop."

"But one day you will, sweetheart. I don't want you to be alone when you do."

"I know." Louis leaned his head back against the seat, eyes closed. "I don't want that either. The past few months have been hell, Mom. I just need...someone."

"Of course you do. I've been there, it was years before I decided to date again after your father left. Once you kids were grown, I realized how lonely I was."

"And look at you now," Louis grinned, thinking of his stepfather. "Happier than I've ever seen you."

"Exactly. And you deserve that, too."

"What kind of man would understand and be okay with my work schedule, though? And all the traveling?"

"He's out there, honey. Maybe not on 'The Bachelor', but if not there then somewhere. It's a good way for you to break into the dating world again. Just give it a chance, okay?"

"I am. I'm actually excited, those Bachelor guys are usually pretty hot."

"Yes, they are," she laughed. "They didn't tell you anything about him, did they?"

"No, we find out the day we all arrive. They take us through the rules and get us settled in the big mansion, then tell us a little about him. And the first night we get to meet him, do that whole 'exit the limo' greeting thing. I still can't believe you got me watching that stupid show."

"I know, it's addicting. Do I have permission to tell your sisters about this?"

Louis groaned. "They're gonna find out anyway. And they won't let me live it down. Lottie'll tease me mercilessly, Mom."

"Yes, but she'll also be sitting right next to me rooting for you each week. Of course by then we'll know if you won, but...still. It'll be fun."

"I'm sure I'll be sitting right next to you watching it, too."

"Nope. You'll be watching it with your new man."

"Mom, stop," Louis laughed, blushing slightly. "This may lead to nothing."

"Or it might lead to happiness with the man of your dreams."

And that was the bottom line. The chance for that made it all worth it, even the drama he knew he'd be subjected to. "I hope you're right," Louis said to his mother. "Because it's not going to be a picnic."

"Don't worry about everyone else, honey. Just focus on your future. You're an incredible man, I just know he's going to fall for you. And if he breaks your heart, Lottie and I will find out where he lives and break all his bones to get even."

Laughing, Louis shook his head. "Okay, I've gotta get home. Looks like I have some packing to do. I'll call you later, Mom. Love you."

"I love you, too. Now go get yourself a man."

As Louis pulled out of the lot a few minutes later, he was smiling again. In Los Angeles, his future husband was waiting for him. There was no guarantee Louis would even want to marry this man once they met, but if he did, he knew he could win.

One thing Louis Tomlinson could always do once he set his mind to it was win.


	2. Chapter 2

Two hours in and already the cliques were forming. Louis wasn't really surprised, as he'd expected that, but he hadn't expected to be shunned simply for existing. One of the contestants had recognized him, and as the rumblings made their way through the clusters of men Louis finally understood that his semi-celebrity status gave him an unfair advantage over everyone else (or so the consensus seemed to be).

They'd all been shown to their rooms and Louis considered himself lucky to be sharing with two guys who seemed somewhat normal, or at the very least not prone to drama. The little mixer going on presently was an opportunity for the contestants to get to know each other a bit, but Louis was sitting in a corner of the room by himself and more than content to be there sipping his beer and watching everyone else mingle.

He chuckled as his roommate Liam flitted to the next group of men, having inserted himself in each one as if doing a taste test to determine the right flavor for his palate. The taller man was friendly and bubbly and currently the only one who hadn't glared at him in any way since he'd been outed as a "celebrity."

_Well, that's not true. Niall hasn't, either._ Louis' attention was drawn to his other roommate, a seemingly shy and quiet sort who was more interested in staring out the window at the gardens surrounding the massive pool than in his fellow contestants. The vibe he'd received from Niall as they shook hands hadn't been negative, but Louis hadn't felt any warmth in it, either. He was curious, feeling that familiar pull to someone who didn't fit in and was usually ruled out by all competition as the underdog.

_I don't know why he'd be considered no competition, he's gorgeous._ Brown hair that was laying flat across his forehead but would probably be extremely sexy when tousled by a rough hand, along with piercing blue eyes that studied you in a glance, observing everything there was to see and storing it away to be processed later. Louis had felt like a specimen to be analyzed when they'd shaken hands and nodded at each other in the bedroom, but it hadn't necessarily been a _bad_ feeling.

Making a snap decision, Louis reached back into the tub of iced drinks behind him and called out, "Niall! Think fast!" When Niall spun around in surprise, hands in pockets and gaze confused, Louis launched a bottle of beer at him.

Quick reflexes had Niall's hands coming up to catch it automatically as his eyes widened. He relaxed and sent Louis a tiny but rueful smile. "Thanks."

Ignoring the sudden attention thrown their way, Louis inclined his head slightly in invitation for Niall to join him. After a brief hesitation Niall did, settling onto the loveseat next to Louis but keeping a respectable distance.

"If you're not a Corona kind of guy, there are other beers in there," Louis offered.

"Corona's good, thanks. Haven't had a beer in ages." Niall cracked open the bottle and took a long swallow, Louis admiring his profile. Like most of the men in the room, Niall truly was gorgeous, if in an understated way.

"Seriously? Not even a few while watching a game on T.V.?"

"I don't watch sports much any more, and somehow knocking back a brewski while watching 'Dora the Explorer' feels wrong," Niall chuckled.

"Dora the...Niall, do you have kids?" Louis asked softly in surprise.

He hesitated once again, Louis learning quickly that this was a standard response with Niall, but finally said, "A daughter. And I don't want that spread around, so can we keep it between us?"

"Sure, but why should it be a secret? It's nothing to be ashamed of. Did you adopt?"

"No, I was married. She died a few years back."

"Niall, I'm so sorry." Without giving even two thoughts to how it might look, Louis covered Niall's hand and squeezed. "Did you realize after that you were gay or did you always know deep down?"

Taking another sip before leaning back into the loveseat and pulling his hand free from Louis', Niall said quietly, "I've been attracted to men all my life, but dated women when I did date. I loved her, though. She's the only woman I've ever loved and I married her without reservation. She was amazing, a wonderful mother and my best friend and I miss her every day. And I can't believe I just told you all that." Niall blinked, shaking his head. "I don't like to talk about it."

"We don't have to, it's fine. But if you need to, I don't mind listening."

"Thanks. I prefer not to. How about you? I hear you play soccer. Does being openly gay make that difficult?"

"Sometimes," Louis replied, settling back against the cushions. "Mostly it's not a big deal once I get on the pitch and show what I can do. Then I become the threat rather than the girly man to be laughed at."

"Nice," Niall chuckled. "But it must be hard having that stigma automatically attached to you. No one in my life knows I'm gay, except my mother. When the show airs it's going to change the way all of my patrons and co-workers see me. I'm worried Nola will be teased, and I'm totally prepared to move if I have to."

"How old is she?"

"Only five, but she goes to school so she might hear some things."

"Yeah, I'm lucky in that my little sisters are old enough to punch anyone who says anything bad about me. Then again, one did that at the age of ten, so really that's not saying much."

"She sounds great," Niall grinned. "My mom says the same thing, she'll make anyone sorry for laughing at my sexuality."

"Where do you work that you have...patrons? Is that what you called it?"

"Yes. I run the local library. Pretty much everyone in town knows me and I think they're going to feel let down when it gets out I'm gay."

"Who cares what they think? I can see that it might make your job a little harder with some people, but it's nobody's business except yours and Nola's. Where is she staying while this is going on?"

"My mom's living at my house with her. Mom encouraged me to do this, she wants to see me find love and someone to raise Nola with. I have no idea what to expect in this Bachelor guy or even if he'd be open to dating a man with a kid. The producers almost turned me down because as a father I'm not considered 100% gay, but they decided bringing in someone with a child might be interesting to the viewers."

"Yeah, my notoriety as a pro athlete is what got me in, I'm sure. It's all about the ratings for these people."

"Which is what worries me. But I can leave at any time if I need to."

"Aww, Niall, you're not leaving yet, are you?"

Niall and Louis glanced up at the man who'd appeared in front of them and was currently frowning at Niall. Liam had flitted his way over to them.

"I...well, no. I was just saying if I need to, I can."

"Good, because you seem like a nice guy. And after talking to everyone else here, I think those are gonna be hard to find."

"You seemed to fit in with a few people," Louis reasoned. "They can't all be assholes."

"No," Liam agreed, "but since we're all in competition, the asshole meter is off the charts. Everyone has to look out for themselves, you know?"

"Yeah, but we're all here with the same goal, right? To find love? Can't be a complete dick if you expect to win over a man." When Louis noticed Liam shooting him a curious look, he asked, "What? Aren't you here to find love?"

"I am, but I was wondering how you knew I 'fit in with a few people.' Were you watching me, Louis?" Liam teased, one eyebrow cocked as he smirked.

Louis' cheeks colored. "Maybe," he conceded. "I'm fascinated by the way you hop from group to group, testing everyone out like you're trying on shoes. But I think you've reached the end of the line now, there are no conversations left for you to crash."

"Looks like I saved the best for last, then, didn't I? I think these shoes fit pretty well. You guys aren't assholes." Liam perched on the arm of the couch next to Niall, not even noticing that Niall looked almost panicked at the proximity as he reached behind them for a beer with one hand and squeezed Niall's shoulder with the other.

With a chuckle Louis scooted as far to the right as he could, allowing Niall to distance himself some from Liam.

"So how about you, Niall?" Liam asked after tipping back his bottle. "You here to find love?"

"Like Louis said, we all are."

"I'm not so sure. See those two in the corner? The way they're talking, it's all a game to them. They just want to win. And the dude in the hat? He wants to get famous. I'm surprised he hasn't tried to talk to you yet, Louis."

"He probably thinks I'm an asshole," Louis quipped.

"Ah, touché." Liam laughed and clinked bottles with Louis, Niall shrinking back into the cushions to get out of the way. "Niall, dude, loosen up. Have some fun. Isn't it nice to get away from your life for a while at least? Think of it like a vacation."

Knowing Niall was worried about his daughter, Louis said, "Doesn't mean we don't miss our lives and people back home."

"No, I know. It wasn't easy to leave my business in the hands of my sister for six weeks, trust me. But I decided to do this, so I'm gonna have fun with it."

"What's your business?" Niall asked Liam.

"Hot dogs."

"Hot dogs? Really?"

"Yes. I sell hot dogs. We've expanded to other stuff, too, but the hot dogs are still what everyone loves best. They're the best hot dogs in the world."

"That's a pretty huge claim to make," Niall commented.

"Yeah," Louis agreed. "Because nobody can beat Payne's Dogs. Have you guys had those? Every time we play in New York I make myself sick eating those damn things. So worth it, though."

Liam sat up straighter, beaming. "Why thank you, Louis. Told you they're the best in the world."

Louis's eyes widened. "No way. You own that place?"

"Started out with one little cart downtown. The secret isn't the hot dogs themselves, but the spices I use."

"Dude, they're addicting. I don't even like hot dogs that much, but when I'm in NYC that's all I eat. You win, they are the best in the world." They clinked bottles again, Niall leaning back.

"I've never had them," he contributed. "This is the first time I've been out of Missouri since I was a kid."

"Missouri? I'm from Illinois! We're neighbors," Louis smiled.

"Aww, I'm jealous. I'm way over in New York, on the other side of the country from you guys. No fair."

"It's not that far. And just think," Niall began, "if you win, you might move out here. Of course it depends on where the Bachelor is from. You might end up in Texas for all we know."

"That's a good point," Louis agreed. "You ready to leave behind your business, Liam? He might be the kind of guy who refuses to move."

"He travels all the time anyway, it won't be a big deal. We'll make it work."

Niall frowned, looking up at Liam. "How do you know he travels?" He glanced over at Louis, who shrugged.

"Because he's a model. At least that's what everyone's saying. Dave said he heard from Scott that it's Harry Styles."

Niall's brows drew together. "Harry Styles? Never heard of him."

Louis' face had turned to stone. "Please tell me you're joking, Liam. Please. I did not come all this way to meet some stuck-up, full-of-himself playboy who sleeps with a different guy every fucking night."

"Give him a chance, Louis. You haven't even met him."

"I don't need to meet him, Liam." Louis stood up. "If that's who we're dealing with, I might as well leave right now."

Niall grabbed Louis' sleeve and pulled him back down. "Calm down, it may not even be true. Now who's Harry Styles?"

"A gorgeous model who will take your breath away the second he walks into the room," Liam answered.

"You left out the part about him being a sleazeball who spends more time worrying about his hair than the way he treats people."

"For someone who hates him so much, you seem to know a lot about him, Louis," Niall teased.

"Yeah, how _do_ you know all this?"

"Don't you guys ever read the magazine covers at the grocery store?" Louis asked. When both Niall and Liam laughed, Louis sighed. "Okay, there's also the fact that I've been stuck at home for two months with nothing to do but watch television. I can't help but see his stupid face everywhere-on the news, on those celebrity shows, even on commercials. Besides that, my mom likes to keep up on celebrity gossip. Oh, she's gonna die when she finds out it's him."

"It might not even be him," Niall soothed again, patting Louis' arm. "Calm down."

"I'm pretty sure it's him," Liam argued. "Everyone seems to think so. And if it is, he's freaking hot."

"Looks aren't everything," Louis reminded him.

"No, but he'll be pretty to stare at if nothing else. At least until he sends me home. You guys, what if I don't even make it past tonight? That would suck."

"It would be his loss, Liam."

Liam smiled over at Louis. "Thanks. He'd be stupid to send you guys home, too."

"If I don't leave first. Seriously, it can't be him. That guy's got too much going on. How can he just leave everything behind for six weeks?"

Niall bit his lip before responding. "Sometimes the risk is worth it, if there's a chance of fulfilling your hopes and dreams."

Louis' face softened, his hand cupping Niall's as he realized how important it was to Niall to find a good father for Nola. "I know. I'm the first to tell people not to let opportunities pass them by. But Niall, he's not the kind of guy you want to take home. Trust me."

"Give him a chance," Liam said again. "Maybe he woke up one day and realized he's lonely. You can only fuck a million guys for so long before it leaves you feeling empty. Not that I've ever had that problem myself, but..."

"Yeah, I know," Louis chuckled. "Me neither."

"And you can't trust everything you read in magazines," Liam added. "One guy who did a story about me screwed up and said I had six dogs."

"Wow," Niall said.

"I know! I only have five dogs, thank you very much!"

Louis and Niall busted up laughing. "Yeah, that's so much better," Louis shook his head.

"You'd love my babies. They're the best cuddlers in the whole world."

"Thanks, but I'm looking for someone with less fur to cuddle with."

"Yeah," Liam replied wistfully. "Me, too."

Glancing from Liam to Niall, who had pulled out his phone and was rubbing a thumb over the background picture of a darling little girl in braids, Louis was suddenly hit with a sense of impending doom. These two were going to get their hearts broken, he had no doubt; neither had any idea what he was in for with Harry Styles. Sighing, he knew what he had to do-if they survived the first rose ceremony tonight, Louis would have to stay for them, both to protect them from the assholes around them and to help them through the inevitable broken hearts that would result when Harry sent them home.

"To love," he said, lifting his bottle.

"To love," Liam nodded, grinning as he clinked with Louis.

After sliding his phone back into his pocket, Niall raised his own bottle. "To love."

* * *

As the limo rolled up the winding road toward the big mansion, Louis was surprised to realize he was actually nervous. It wasn't that he cared either way what Harry Styles thought of him, really, but at the same time it was necessary to make a good impression because he wanted to stick around for his new friends.

Liam's intel had indeed been right—they were told it was Harry they would be meeting and the overall reception had been excited anticipation. Niall and Liam were currently voicing their musings aloud, wondering if he would be as gorgeous in person as he was in pictures. After Liam had whipped out his phone and looked up a few pics for Niall to see, Niall was both nervous and excited himself about meeting Harry.

Louis had to admit, the man was beautiful. Chestnut curls that shone under the lights and camera flashes usually aimed his way, green eyes that seemed somewhat guarded in interviews, and a body that proved Harry at least took care of himself physically. There had been rumors floating around that Harry had undergone plastic surgery at a younger age in order to ensure his place in the modeling world, but Louis didn't buy that. Pictures he'd seen on those celebrity entertainment shows proved Harry had always been beautiful. It wasn't his looks that turned Louis off, it was the arrogance and obvious sense of entitlement that was so apparent every time the man opened his mouth.

"I wish I could've brought him a hot dog," Liam sighed, pulling Louis out of his thoughts.

While Niall rolled his eyes, Louis said, "You know, normally I'd laugh at a comment like that, but I know from experience that would win me over. What sort of spices to do you use in those things, anyway?"

"Highly-guarded secret, Louis."

"I'm sure you'll find a way to get him one, and then we'll all be screwed."

"Louis, you have nothing to worry about," Niall smiled from his seat across the car. "You're gorgeous. He's not sending you home."

Flattered, Louis was momentarily speechless but then responded, "Thank you, Niall. I was having similar thoughts about you earlier."

Niall immediately blushed and looked down with a tiny smile.

"Do I need to leave you two alone?" Liam joked, moving as if about to open the limo door.

"Nah," Louis laughed. "But it needed to be said, because I get the feeling Niall doesn't think too highly of himself. Nor do you, Liam. You two are both sexy in your own ways."

"It's just the hair," Niall grinned, running a hand over his new spiky 'do. After staring at himself in the mirror with a forlorn look for five minutes, he'd finally allowed Louis and Liam to give him a makeover. There wasn't much they could change except his hair, but Louis thought the rest was perfect on its own. "Still not used to this," Niall said now. "I feel like I'm trying to be someone I'm not."

"Just be yourself," Louis advised. "But talk to him, don't let the shyness overwhelm you. You're actually a very intelligent guy, aren't you?"

"Certified genius," Niall answered. "I was going to be a neurosurgeon until..." After a glance at Liam, Niall finished, "...things got in the way."

"Wait, so you're a genius? Damn, I can't compete with that. All I got is hot dogs."

Louis shook his head. "No, Liam, you've got an infectious smile and a bubbly, charismatic personality that makes everyone instantly like you."

"It's true," Niall nodded.

"Most of those guys weren't very friendly."

"That's because you're competition."

"Exactly," Louis agreed. "Trust me, I'm the one who needs to worry. I've got nothing going for me except soccer, and while the producers seemed to see the value in that, Harry certainly won't."

"Are you kidding?" Liam argued with wide eyes. "That's why the guys all hate you. Because Harry is obsessed with soccer."

"Obsessed with...what are you talking about?"

"Dude, I heard the guys, they said it's not fair that you're on the show because Harry loves soccer, goes to every game he can. It's his favorite sport."

"Wow," Niall commented. "Looks like you've got a good chance, then, Louis."

"You've got to be joking. There's no way that pompous pretty boy likes anything as brutal and manly as soccer."

Niall raised an eyebrow. "Now who's stereotyping?" Liam nodded with a smirk.

"You guys, I'm not...it's..." Louis fell silent as it sank in. "Damn, you're right. I'm just as bad as the ones who think because I'm gay I don't know how to play soccer. Shit."

"See?" Liam said as he kicked a foot out to nudge Louis'. "Don't assume things about him. He might actually be a nice guy."

"Yeah, still not buying that."

"Oh god, there it is." Niall wrung his hands as they all turned to stare out the window at the mansion looming in the dark. "I'm gonna throw up. I can't do this."

"You're gonna be great," Liam soothed, sliding an arm over Niall's shoulder and hugging him close. "Show him that brain of yours."

"I don't know what to say."'

"Just be yourself," Louis said again. "Both of you. I know tonight's a big deal, we all have to make an impression that makes him want to keep us around, but no matter what happens with him, you two will find love. I guarantee you that. You're both incredible guys."

Touched, Niall and Liam smiled up at Louis and reached out for a hand. He took each of theirs, all of them squeezing tight as the limo rolled to a stop. "To love," they said in unison, their stomachs tight with nerves. 

* * *

Harry was torn between excitement and impatience as he watched the last limo roll to a stop. He couldn't believe how hot most of these guys were and couldn't wait to get inside and mingle with all of them, to start getting his feet wet and see what lay behind the pretty faces. He was trying to take Lou's advice and think of them not only as sex objects but actual people who were here to find love, but so far it had been difficult because he spent less than a minute in each man's company. How could you think of more than someone's looks when you barely got to talk to them?

He smiled as a tall, muscular guy bounded out of the limo and made his way forward as if he'd decided to jump in headfirst and not look back. Harry liked that in a person. "Hey," he greeted, holding out a hand.

"What's up? I'm Liam, and I'm here to win you over."

Harry laughed, taken aback by the declaration. "Well that's good, because I'm here to be won over. What should I know about you?"

"I make a mean hot dog."

"Oh? I happen to love hot dogs."

"Then you'll happen to love _me_ ," Liam beamed, and Harry found that he couldn't stop smiling—it was infectious when those bright eyes were sparkling at you.

"Cocky, aren't you?" Harry asked, but he was amused.

"I'm in it to win it, and I take only one prisoner. That would be you."

Feeling a flirtatious reply at the tip of his tongue, Harry held it in; he wasn't here to bring someone home for the night, and habit made him want to turn everything into a sexual invitation when he was approached in that manner. Instead he said, "I look forward to hearing more about this plan of yours. Especially if it involves hot dogs."

"Find me inside, handsome."

Liam winked and headed toward the house, leaving Harry almost speechless. He was used to being flirted with, and certainly there had been a few who were forward tonight, but something about the sparkle in those dark eyes left him feeling playful rather than simply wanting to drag the guy off to bed. Liam would be someone he'd have fun with, no doubt.

Harry was still thinking about Liam when he realized the next man was walking toward him; he'd been so quiet Harry hadn't even noticed. "Hi."

"Hello," the guy managed. He held out a hand and Harry shook it, surprised to find the grip stronger than the man's seemingly small frame hinted at.

"I'm Harry," he coaxed, unsure whether the guy was nervous or trying to play the mysterious role.

"Niall." Clearing his throat, Niall squeezed Harry's hand tighter before releasing it.

"Are you...alright?"

"Me? I'm great, I...okay, no, I'm extremely nervous and I'm sure it shows and you're so much more gorgeous in person and I just—wow, can't believe I said that out loud."

Harry found the flush that crept up Niall's cheeks adorable. He laughed and reached up to lay a hand on Niall's shoulder. "It's okay, I don't bite. Not unless you want me to."

The poor guy's eyes almost bugged out and Harry laughed again. "Sorry, I couldn't resist. But really, just because I'm beautiful doesn't mean you should be afraid of me. I can be nice."

"I didn't mean to insinuate that you couldn't, I'm sorry. Can I just get back in the limo and start over, we can pretend this never happened?" Niall asked with an embarrassed smile.

"Absolutely not." Harry loved that even Niall's ears had turned red. "Get in there and have a drink, I'll find you and show you I'm not a scary guy. Don't let my sexy intimidate you." When Niall managed an eye roll, Harry knew he was relaxing. "I'll catch you later, Niall."

Niall nodded and moved past Harry, who turned around to watch him go. "Adorable," he said to himself with a chuckle, then spun back around to greet the last contestant. He was short and when he looked up with intense blue eyes Harry felt his stomach drop. "Oh my god," he whispered.

The guy held a hand out. "Hi, I'm-"

"Louis Tomlinson. Holy shit, is it really you?"

"Uh..." After glancing around, Louis said quietly, "I think they're gonna have to bleep that out. You probably shouldn't cuss too much while you're being filmed."

"I can't...oh my god, it _is_ you! I've wanted to meet you forever, you're the best player I've ever seen and I went to all the games I could when you played for LA and I can't believe you're standing right in front of me, Louis Tomlinson, holy shit!"

"Dude, calm down. It's okay, I'm just a person."

"I know, but you're Louis Tomlinson! Louis freaking Tomlinson! Can't believe this!" Harry forced himself to take a breath, putting his hands up as if pushing away air. "Okay. I'm okay. I can do this. I just...wow. Louis Tomlinson! I feel like I should be asking for your autograph or something!"

"How about we try shaking hands instead?"

"Right. Yes. Hands." Harry shoved his out, telling himself to relax, he was making an idiot out of himself but _oh my god, it's Louis Tomlinson!_ Louis shook it with a small smile that didn't reach his eyes and Harry noticed that immediately, his own narrowing. _I just ruined this. Fuck. I'm a fan to him now, not someone he'd want to date. Just calm down and be normal._ "I'm sorry, they didn't tell me. I'm a huge fan and that's something they should've told me."

"They like surprises, haven't you watched the show?" Louis grinned and released Harry's hand.

_That gorgeous smile, there it is. Focus, Harry._ "I'll uh...see you inside, then?"

"Wouldn't miss it," Louis answered, and then he was gone.

Harry took a long moment to get himself under control, and then he went in to face the crowd of men who would soon be fighting over him.


	3. Chapter 3

"I ruined it," Niall mumbled with a hand over his face.

"Come on, I'm sure it wasn't that bad." Liam motioned for Louis to get something for Niall to drink, he didn't care what as long as it would relax him.

"It was. I told him he's more gorgeous in person."

"Niall," Louis began, passing Liam a wine cooler, "I'm sure he loved hearing that. The guy's stuck on himself."

"But you don't want to blurt out something like that the first time you meet someone!" Absently screwing open the bottle Liam had handed him, Niall gulped down half of it before continuing. "I bet he's laughing at me."

"I bet he's not," Louis argued. He was perched on the arm of the couch next to Liam, a hand reaching over to squeeze Niall's shoulder. "He probably found you adorable. I know I would've."

"Yeah, but you're you. He's...wow. How is anyone that beautiful?"

"I know!" Liam hissed. "I don't even know how I got two words out, he was so gorgeous! But I was determined to get out there and make an impression. I think I did, he wants to hear more about my hot dogs."

After exchanging a glance, Niall and Louis started giggling. "Did you really mention the hot dogs?" Louis asked in disbelief.

"I did! I mean, I didn't tell him the whole story, you don't have a lot of time, you know? But I told him I make a mean hot dog and he said he likes hot dogs. Does that sound stupid? It sounds stupid, doesn't it?"

Sliding an arm around Liam, Niall soothed, "Don't worry. At least he didn't tell you he only bites if you want him to."

Liam almost spit out his drink. "What? He said that to you?"

Louis shook his head, laughing. "See, Niall? You had nothing to worry about. He was flirting with you. Sounds like with you, too, Liam."

"I couldn't really tell. It happened so fast. What about you, Louis? You _were_ nice to him, weren't you?"

"Well, I didn't get much of a chance to talk. He just kept gushing."

"Gushing how?" Niall asked.

"Liam was right, he's a huge soccer fan, I guess, and he recognized me. It was weird, I felt like I was at a game and meeting a fan instead of my possible future husband."

Liam shook his head. "Man, you are so lucky. No wonder they all hate you, you already have this in the bag."

"Not even," Louis disagreed. "Being a fan doesn't mean you know someone. He probably-"

The room fell silent as Harry appeared, smiling at all of them in greeting. His eyes settled on Louis and then sort of melted before moving on.

"You were saying?" Liam joked quietly. "Damn, he's all over you."

"He won't like me once he gets to know me." Louis stood up as Harry approached them, already knowing what was coming. When Harry asked if he could borrow Louis for a few minutes, Louis merely nodded and followed Harry out to the pool area, feeling daggers of hatred from every direction.

Once they were seated in a loveseat on the patio, Harry took a deep breath. "Okay, so I kind of freaked out earlier. Can we forget about that whole thing?"

"Kind of hard," Louis smirked, sitting sideways and leaning back some. Liam and Niall had been right, Harry was breathtakingly gorgeous. He hadn't noticed it much out front due to his surprise at being gushed over.

"I'm sorry, it really threw me. What are you even doing here, the season's still going on! Were the Earthquakes stupid enough to let you go for a few months?"

"I've been out with an injury. Pulled a muscle and it sidelined me."

"I've barely been able to see any games lately, been so busy. I didn't know. You're okay, though, right? Still gonna play?"

"Yes, but not this season. I'm still recovering, though I'm pretty much healed."

Harry shook his head. "I'm trying to figure out what you're doing here. You could have anybody, dude. You're so hot."

"Um. Thanks." Unused to such blatant compliments, Louis blushed slightly and took a second to sip his beer. "What about you? Don't you have a million guys beating down your door?"

"Doesn't mean I want to open it to any of them."

"But you think you'll find someone special here?"

"It could happen. There are a lot of gorgeous guys in that house."

"There are," Louis nodded. "Got your eye on any of them yet?"

"Not like I'd tell you if I did," Harry smirked. "But there is one really hot guy sitting right next to me that I'm dying to kiss."

"Oh." Blushing again, Louis cleared his throat. "Kissing on the first date's not a good idea, especially with twenty-five other guys watching us."

"Don't forget about the millions of viewers at home that will see it eventually."

"Yeah. Why did I agree to this again?" Louis asked.

"Because you're lonely, I would guess. Isn't that why all of you are here?"

"Not necessarily. Some have agendas that are nothing to do with you. Be careful who you give your heart to."

"Thanks for the tip. If I-" Harry stopped speaking, looking up in surprise as they were joined by a guy that Louis thought was named Peter. "Hi."

"Hi! May I steal you?"

Louis could see that Harry wasn't thrilled with the idea, but he smiled as Louis stood and motioned for Peter to take the vacated seat. "I'll catch you later, Louis."

Nodding, Louis made his way back to the house, his heart beating a little harder than he wanted to acknowledge. Part of him had been tempted to let Harry kiss him, and could anyone blame him really? The man was achingly beautiful.

He found Liam and Niall where he'd left them, chatting on the loveseat. He ignored the curious glances sent their way as he settled onto the arm next to Niall.

"Well?" Liam prodded.

"Well, what? We just talked for a few minutes. He was embarrassed about his behavior earlier, wanted to apologize."

"We saw Peter go out there," Niall commented.

"Yeah, he interrupted us. Which was fine, Harry is supposed to spend time with everyone."

Liam was nodding. "So he _is_ nice. I told you, Louis."

"I never said he was nice. I said he was apologetic due to his embarrassment."

"Still. You're so winning this."

"Liam, I haven't even talked to him for more than ten minutes! This is only the first night."

"I just hope I get a rose," Niall worried. "I'd like to stay long enough to have one real date with him. Well, maybe. Every time I think about being alone with him I feel like I'm gonna throw up."

"You'll be fine." Liam patted Niall's knee, his attention drawn away by Harry re-entering the house. When Harry's eyes swept over them and then back, he gave Harry a bright grin. Harry chuckled, motioning for him to approach, and Liam hopped up. "Yes!"

"Good luck!" Louis called out. "He's so exuberant," he said to Niall.

"He is. It's kind of cute, isn't it? He's just so excited to be here, wants to find someone so badly."

Sliding down onto the cushion, Louis asked, "And do you? Or is your main goal to find a father for Nola?"

Niall shrugged. "Both, I guess. I am lonely."

"Did you consider dating a woman, or did you know after your wife died that you wanted a man?"

"I was sure it was a man I wanted at that point. There was a lot of guilt when she was alive, because even though I loved her and never regretted marrying her, there were times I'd lay in bed and wish I could be with a man. And that was wrong, I never should have had those thoughts."

"You can't help what you're attracted to, Niall."

"I know, but I still felt so guilty. Like I was cheating on her in my mind. She was amazing, Louis. The best mother in the world."

"And a good wife to you?"

"Yes. She was affectionate, never made me feel like I wasn't good enough. Always made a point to tell me I was sexy," Niall smiled.

"Well, you are."

"Stop," he argued, and again his cheeks flushed. "I don't feel that way. And she'd say things like that and then go to sleep while I was laying in bed having impure thoughts about a patron or the guy who works at the grocery store. I shouldn't have ever had those thoughts."

"You couldn't help it. Had you ever been with a man before?"

"Once. There was this guy in high school who always needed my help studying, and it took me forever to realize he actually wanted to make out with me. So we uh...did."

"Yeah?" Louis grinned. "How was it?"

"Incredible. I met Barbara right after that and we started dating, but if I hadn't I probably would've gone for a guy. Sometimes I think I should've, but then I think about Nola and I know things happened the way they were supposed to."

Louis nodded slowly. "It must be hard, raising a kid on your own."

"My mom helps a lot. After Barbara died I went through a major depression, and she was there for Nola. And she's the one who finally convinced me it wasn't my fault that Barbara died."

"Your fault that...Niall, how could that possibly be your fault? How did she die?" Louis wished he could take the words back once they were out, because Niall's face shut down and he looked like he wasn't going to answer, but then he did.

"Blood clot in her brain. There was no warning, she just..." He trailed off, looking away and tipping his bottle up to his mouth.

"Niall," Louis said softly, reaching for his hand. "You don't have to talk about it. But you do know that's not your fault, right? You did nothing to make that happen."

Nodding, Niall blinked rapidly. "I used to think it was because I cheated on her in my mind. That God was punishing me."

"Jesus, come here." Louis stood and pulled Niall up off the couch, dragging him out to the patio and out of sight of everyone else. Niall didn't fight it when Louis wrapped his arms around him, sinking into the warmth of someone holding him in a way no one except his mother had since his wife died. "You know better now, right?"

"Yeah," Niall replied softly. "I do now. I was studying to be a doctor, I know how blood clots work and that it's nothing you can predict or prevent, but I was feeling so guilty over everything that I convinced myself of that."

"How did you end up in a library?"

"Nola happened. We were planning to move so I could get my master's. I got the bachelor degree in half the time most people do, but when Barbara got pregnant we decided to stay close to our parents because we knew we'd need the help. I worked more hours at the library and before I knew it, I was basically running the place and my dreams of being a doctor were—wait a minute." Niall stepped back out of Louis's arms, looking up at him suspiciously. "How do you _do_ that?"

"Do what?" Louis asked, bewildered.

"I've told you more about myself than most people who have known me all my life know. I don't talk about this stuff, Louis. How in the world did you get me to spill so much?"

"I...no idea." At a loss, Louis shrugged. "I just asked about you."

"Yeah, but people ask about me all the time, and I close up. With you it's the opposite. Damn, Liam is right. You've got this thing won. Nobody could resist you."

The compliment surprised Louis into a smirk. "Oh really?"

"Oh, see? Now you've got me embarrassing myself. Like this night isn't stressful enough already?"

"Dude, relax," Louis chuckled. "Look, if you really don't have anyone you can talk to besides your mom, can I give you my number? We don't know what's going to happen tonight and I'd like to keep in touch with you if I could." When Niall hesitated, Louis added, "I'm not trying to pick up on you. I don't have a lot of friends to talk to, either, okay? I feel like you could be someone who would be a great friend."

That did the trick. Niall nodded. "Okay. Remind me when we get back to the room tonight, we'll exchange numbers." A loud laugh echoed across the patio to them, and they both smiled. "What do you want to bet they're talking about hot dogs?" Louis grinned.

"Ah, Liam. I really like that guy."

"Me, too. We should get his number, too. If nothing else, I can get free hot dogs when I play in New York, right?"

"Definitely. Do you really think they're talking about hot dogs?"

"Honestly? I do," Louis laughed.

* * *

Harry had led Liam to the same loveseat he'd used with the other contestants, but Liam was distracted by the pool.

"Look at that, is that a waterfall?" He stepped closer to the edge, eyes lit up. "Wow, a jacuzzi with a waterfall. We gotta try that."

"Now?" Harry asked incredulously.

"Well, okay, maybe not right now, but I'm totally checking that out when I get time."

"If you really want to strip right here and check it out, I certainly won't stop you," Harry smirked.

"Already trying to get me naked, are you?" Liam teased, a smile widening across his face. "I'll take that as a compliment."

Harry laughed. "You are like no one I've ever met. I think we would have a lot of fun together."

"Fun is good. A lot of people don't know how to have fun. How about we just put our feet in the water for now, since we're pressed for time and you still have some more guys to talk to?" Liam sat on the edge of the pool and started untying his shoes, and Harry couldn't resist. He did the same, peeling off his socks and rolling his pants up to his knees before dipping his feet in.

"Wow, that's actually not even cold. Maybe we _should_ go for a swim."

"Not enough time," Liam said sadly. "Guess you'll have to keep me around another week so we can do this."

"I certainly have to make sure I hear about these amazing hot dogs."

"Don't mock the dogs. They're the best in the world."

"According to you and your mom?" Harry teased.

"According to the entire state of New York."

"Wow, really?"

"Really. I'll find a way to make you one while I'm here. But you have to promise to give me a rose tonight or you'll never know what you're missing."

Harry couldn't help but laugh at Liam' persistence. "I could just fly to New York."

"Too much trouble. You've got the master right here, might as well take advantage of him."

"Interesting choice of words," Harry responded, eyes sparkling.

"Is it working?"

Harry laughed yet again—it was working a little too well. "Tell me about yourself. What do you do?"

"I just did. I sell hot dogs."

"Wait, that's your business? You actually sell hot dogs?"

"Yes, but it's better than it sounds. I own stands all over the state. My dogs are legendary."

"Seriously?"

"Yep. And it's more than just my mom who thinks so."

"So who's running the place while you're here?"

"My sister. I worry about what she'll do while I'm gone. Not that I'm in a hurry to leave," Liam added hastily. "Keep me here as long as you want."

"You're definitely the first to make me laugh so much, I'll say that."

"Good! Next time we can go skinny-dipping."

Harry laughed again, loudly this time as he reached down to splash a little water toward Liam.

"Dude! These are nice pants!" Liam whined.

"I know, and for the first time in my life I don't even care." Harry splashed Liam again.

"Oh, it's on." Liam leaned down to scoop water up at Harry, who tried to duck it because Liam was using both hands.

"No fair, one hand!"

"You started it!" Liam yelled as Harry tried to stop him, and the next thing he knew they were grappling with each other, both of them giggling and kicking at the water, forgetting where they were as most of the men came running out to see what all the yelling was about.

"They're gonna fall in," Niall predicted, shaking his head.

"Guess they're not talking about hot dogs," Louis chuckled. He heard rumblings from around them about Liam playing dirty and that he looked ridiculous, but he ignored them because he knew they were coming from a place of jealousy.

"Whoa!" Harry suddenly called out, losing his balance, and Liam managed to pull him back just in time before they both went over the edge. They laid on the cement laughing, both of them panting as they grinned at each other with their feet still in the water. "You're crazy," Harry declared.

"You loved it," Liam smiled. "At least with me you'll always have fun."

"And have great hot dogs, apparently."

"The best."

Realizing they had an audience, Harry sat up and smirked. "Looks like you're not making any friends."

"They're just jealous. But I'll let them have you for a little while, I guess." Liam reached for his shoes and socks as he stood up, offering Harry a hand.

"Hell no," Harry uttered, choosing to raise himself. "I know better, you'll have me in the pool in two seconds."

"Already know me well." Turning away with a wink, Liam called out, "Show's over, folks, nothing to see here!" He grinned as he headed toward Niall and Louis, well aware that Harry's eyes were following him.

As he watched Liam join two of the other contestants, Harry's eyes were drawn to the quiet one, who was laughing as he greeted Liam. _So you do know how to smile._ Catching Niall's eye, Harry inclined his head in invitation, watching the smile freeze on Niall's face to be replaced with wide, almost scared eyes. He noticed Louis lean in and whisper something to Niall, giving him a little push and then Niall was approaching, hands in pockets as everyone else moved back inside to leave them alone.

"How's it going?" Harry greeted him, taking a seat in one of the lounge chairs. "Having fun?"

"Not as much fun as you, apparently." Niall lowered himself next to Harry. "Liam is pretty cool."

"He's definitely a lot of fun, yeah." Harry lifted a foot up to replace his sock. "You two hitting it off pretty well?"

"He's a nice guy. Someone I'll probably keep in touch with when I leave."

"Well, if nothing else, you have to try his hot dogs, right?"

"Exactly," Niall chuckled, and Harry was pleased to see him relaxing some. "According to Louis they really are as good as he claims. You uh...met Louis?"

"I did." Slipping his foot into a shoe, Harry continued with the other one. "Where are you from?"

"A suburb in Missouri. I run the library."

Harry couldn't fight the tiny laugh that escaped him. "That is so you."

"You don't even know me!"

"No, but I totally see you in a library. And I don't mean that as an insult."

"Well, I was going to be a doctor. Plans change."

"A doctor? But you're a librarian instead." Shoes in place, Harry leaned back in the chair to study Niall. "How does that happen?"

"It makes sense if you know the whole story."

"I'd like to hear it sometime." When Niall looked down, obviously uncomfortable, Harry frowned. "We don't have a lot of time to do this the proper way, you know. If we were actually dating, I wouldn't push this so hard. I can tell you don't like talking about yourself-which completely baffles me."

"Because you _do_ like talking about yourself?" Niall smirked, thinking of Louis' words.

"That, and because I get the feeling there's a lot going on in that head of yours."

"Maybe," Niall shrugged. "Tell me about yourself."

"Me?"

"Yeah, you. I hear you're a model, what's that like?"

"It's...wow. You're the first person to ask about me."

"What do you mean?"

"Like...everyone else has told me all about themselves, which is good because it helps me make a decision, but you're the first to be interested in me as a person. Or is it just that you're steering the conversation away from yourself?"

"A little of both," Niall admitted with a sheepish grin. "How long have you been a model?"

"Since I was sixteen. I was in a singing competition in high school and after it was over, some guy gave me a business card and said I should call him. I did, and the rest is history."

"So you sing, too?"

"I haven't for a long time, no. But I did win that competition."

"Ah, so you're good."

"It's been so long I wouldn't even know anymore."

"You like modeling better, I take it?"

"I love modeling. There's nothing like being up on a stage and having all eyes on you, adoring you and admiring how beautiful you are."

Niall shivered slightly. "No, thanks. I can't stand it when people watch me."

"I bet it happens a lot, though. You're hot in this really quiet kind of way. Oh, there I go, making you blush again," Harry joked, but it was true—Niall had turned red again. "I mean it! You've got a great smile, you should use it more often."

"So uh..." Clearing his throat, Niall squeezed his hands between his knees as if he didn't know what to do with them. "You've modeled for what...ten years or so?"

"Yeah. It's exciting, I get to fly all over the world."

"I'm the exact opposite, I never leave home."

"But you took a chance and came here. That's something."

"I did," Niall nodded, considering that. "I guess I'm not completely boring."

"I don't find you boring at all."

When Niall's blue eyes fully met his for the first time since their introduction, Harry's breath stopped. There was an intensity under the surface that Harry would not have predicted, and it shot straight to his core.

"Thank you, Harry. I get the feeling there's more to you than a pretty face walking the runway. I hope I get the chance to find out."

A voice rang out across the patio, breaking them out of the moment. "Hey guys, mind if I crash your party? Time's slipping away."

It was one of the contestants Niall hadn't spoken to yet, not that he'd spoken to many of them. He stood up quickly and shot Harry a smile. "I didn't mean to take up so much of your time, I'm sorry."

"It's fine." Harry stood up as well, somehow managing to welcome the other guy while at the same time letting Niall know he was sorry to see him go. "I enjoyed talking to you."

After giving a little wave Niall walked toward the house, hands once again sliding into his pockets as he stepped through the door. He wasn't sure how well that had gone, but something in Harry's eyes told him he might just be staying at least one more week.

* * *

Ten minutes later Harry re-entered the house, again smiling at everyone as all eyes were glued to his every move. He approached the loveseat as he had before, Louis sighing on the inside when he realized what must be happening—Harry was going to give him the First Impression Rose.

Harry surprised everyone, though, by stopping in front of Liam. "Hey. Join me for a second?"

"Hell yeah!" Liam stood up, letting Harry take his arm. He looked back once with his mouth gaping open, leaving Louis and Niall chuckling.

"That's gotta be the rose," Niall commented when they were gone.

"I'd say so. Liam really does make a great first impression."

"Does it bother you? I mean, I think everyone assumed it would go to you."

"No, it's fine. I'm not worried about going home, he's too big a fan. Once he spends time alone with me, that's when he'll realize I'm not the guy for him."

"Why are you so sure of that?" Niall asked. "Maybe _he's_ the guy for _you_."

"Not even. But I'll stay as long as I can."

"Why?"

"Why?"

"Why?" Niall repeated. "If you know you don't want him, why would you stay?"

Louis shrugged. "Because things can change in a moment. You just don't know."

"So you're not completely closed to the idea."

"I'm not really sure what I want."

Niall nodded. "Well, you only have about six weeks to figure it out."

"How about you? Think I was wrong about Harry?"

"I...don't really know. I think there's a lot more to him than a pretty face."

"We'll see."

Liam held onto Harry's arm with both hands as they walked toward the pool again. "You're not gonna throw me in, are you?"

Harry grinned. "If I did, would you still love me?"

"Probably. But I'd get my revenge, too. When you least expect it. You smile a lot around me. That's a good sign, Harry. It means you like me and I should stick around."

"Oh, think so?"

"Yep."

"Well...okay. You convinced me. Here." Harry reached down to pick up a rose that was lying on a table near the loveseat.

"Oh my god, really! I get the rose?"

"You do." Harry stepped back and fastened it to the front of Liam's shirt. "You have made an incredible impression on me. Now don't let that go to your head-"

"Too late, dude! I'm on top of the world."

Harry shook his head as he giggled. "I don't know how you make me laugh so much. But this means you're safe tonight, and we will meet again next week. I expect a hot dog."

"Nope. You don't get the hot dog until our first date. Which means I have to get one."

"Now you're bribing me?"

"Whatever works."

"Liam..." Harry licked his lips. "Never mind. I'm not allowed to say a lot, just know that I do plan to spend more time with you."

"Awesome! Make sure our date is in a city that sells hot dogs, though. Don't take me to some weird country where we have to eat in a tent. Oh wait, that might work. Can we go camping?"

Harry threw his head back as his body shook with laughter. "Go back in the house. You're killing me here."

"Okay, okay. No kiss?"

He leaned forward and planted one on Liam's cheek. "There. Now you can tell everyone you got the first kiss."

"Not what I was going for, but I'll take it!" Liam practically bounced back toward the house, calling back, "Don't forget! A city that sells hot dogs! And I expect a campfire, too!"

He left Harry once again shaking his head, wondering where this guy had come from and why he hadn't come into Harry's life sooner.

* * *

Before they knew it they were being called together for the first official rose ceremony. All three of them shook hands and wished each other luck, sticking close as they moved with the herd to the large room where they were to hear their fate. The pile of red roses was intimidating as they walked by, most unable to take their eyes off them as they stood on the steps and awaited the man who would decide the next chapter in their lives.

Nervous smiles greeted Harry from all directions as he was welcomed by the host, who took his leave soon after. After clearing his throat, Harry said, "First, I'd like to thank all of you for coming out here and taking a chance on me. I know it's scary, and it's kind of scary for me too; to be honest, this was a lot more than I bargained for when I signed on. But you're all great guys and no matter what happens from here on out, you'll find what you're looking for. Maybe with me, maybe with someone else. It was a pleasure meeting every one of you." Harry gave them a bright smile that did nothing to calm the nerves of those waiting for the final word, and then reached for the first rose.

To no one's surprise, Louis' name was called first. He slipped between the two men in front of him, nodding as Harry asked, "Will you accept this rose?" After Harry pinned it to his shirt he quickly returned to the small crowd, trying to ignore the glares coming his way yet again.

As the next two names were called, Louis sensed Niall's dread rising. He leaned forward and whispered, "You got this. You're amazing."

Niall reached back to squeeze Louis' hand briefly, thanking him for the support, and sure enough, it was Niall who was called next. He let out a breath and stepped out of line, the relief palpable as he halted before Harry.

"Hi, Niall. Will you accept this rose?" Harry asked softly.

"I will. Thank you." He offered Harry a tiny smile, heart fluttering when it was returned. From his place off to the side, Liam gave Niall a high-five when he walked by, causing a few around them to chuckle.

Three minutes later it was done. The three not chosen said quick goodbyes to everyone, leaving Harry alone with the contestants he'd deemed worthy of his attention for at least another week. Glasses of champagne were passed around, and once it quieted down Harry addressed them again. "Those of you who are left, it's because I see something in you that makes me want to see more. I know these next few months aren't going to be easy for a lot of you, and they won't be all that easy for me either, but I hope we can have some fun while we're here and remember what we all came for. To love," he said, raising his glass in a toast.

"To love," everyone chorused, Louis and his new friends smiling at Harry's choice of words.


	4. Chapter 4

Louis and Niall were playing a game of pool when the first date card came. They'd been discussing how much they hated having cameras follow them 24/7 (there were even cameras in the bedrooms), as neither enjoyed being followed constantly; Louis tended to be in the spotlight often because of his career, but this was a whole new level even for him.

Liam ran up from inside the house where he'd been playing video games with a few of the other men. "Guys! It's here! Come on, it's here!"

The anticipation was palpable as they joined the group already crowded around the table in the living room, where an envelope sat daring them to open it. This was the first one-on-one date, the first opportunity for someone to spend time completely alone with Harry, and it would involve a day filled with whatever Harry chose for them as well as a romantic dinner to top it off. If all went well, the contestant would be given a rose at the end of the evening; if not, he would be going home.

"Come on, open it!" Liam urged Peter, who was closest to the envelope.

"We all know it's gonna be for Louis," Scott complained. "Why bother?"

"Dude, you don't know that." Liam grabbed for it suddenly, staring around at them all before sliding a finger under the flap carefully. "I made a pretty good impression on Harry, don't forget."

Louis smirked while Niall only shook his head; Liam hadn't let anyone forget that for the past few days, and yet somehow he was still liked among the guys. Had Louis made a comment like that, his ass would've been kicked by now—or someone would've tried, at the very least. It went to show that Liam had that something special about him that was irresistible to anyone and if Louis had to guess, he would vote Liam as the name on that card.

Sliding out the paper inside, Liam waited until all eyes were on him before reading aloud. "'Louis. Let's-'" The chorus of groans drowned out Liam's voice, and he glared at everyone until it was silent again. "'Louis." He smiled at his blue-eyed buddy, who was inwardly groaning himself. "'Let's have a ball on top of the world.' Huh. Wonder what that means?"

"Maybe he's taking you dancing," Peter mused. "The soccer player at a ball, that ought to be fun."

"Oh please God, no," Louis moaned. "I don't dance."

"Those things are usually a play on words," Niall remarked. "I'm sure it's code for something, not an actual ball. Though I'd pay to see you dancing."

"Shut up." Louis tried to smack Niall, but he ducked it with a grin.

"Come on, Louis! Let's go get you ready for your date!" Liam was pulling him up off the couch, Louis reluctantly following.

"You're coming, too," he called back to Niall. "In this guy's hands I'll probably end up smelling like hot dogs."

"Hey, no mocking the dogs! Say what you want about me, but never mock my dogs."

Chuckling, Niall followed them up the stairs to their room.

"I don't even know what to wear for this thing!" Louis whined.

"Let us worry about that." Liam rubbed his hands together, flinging open the closet they shared with glee.

Niall sat on his bed and offered Louis a smile. "He's way too excited about this."

"I know! You'd think it was _his_ date or something."

Liam pulled out a purple shirt, then shook his head and returned it to the closet. "Oh, don't worry, it will be soon enough."

"Liam, weren't you the guy who thought he had no chance against all of us?" Niall wondered.

"Yeah, but that was before I met him. He likes me. _A lot_. So I'm not even worried about it. Mom always says if it's meant to be, it will be. If it's not, move on to the next thing. Oh, how about this shirt? I bet you look good in blue."

Louis sighed, giving in. He had no idea what to expect on this date tonight, and even less what he wanted the outcome to be.

* * *

When Harry stepped through the door with a big smile for everyone, Louis' heart stopped for a moment. Truly, how could anyone be so beautiful? He hated that, hated that it came to Harry so easily while most guys had to work hard to look even half as good as Harry did.

Every hair was perfectly in place yet somehow still maintained a sexy, wind-blown look. He wore black jeans that managed to give him a classy appearance, which was accented by a dark green button up that was only buttoned about half way.

He stood up, a bit nervous now as Harry turned away from one of the other contestants to smile at him. "Hey. Wow, you look great."

"Uh...really?" Louis asked. "Thanks." Not knowing what sort of date it would be, Liam had chosen a deep blue button-up for him but Niall had made sure to include a t-shirt underneath in case there was anything adventurous planned. He'd wanted jeans but both Liam and Niall shot down that idea. "What if he takes me rock climbing?" Louis had argued. Niall's response had been to toss him a backpack. "There. Take a pair of jeans and sneakers. Now quit arguing with everything we say and let Liam do your hair."

Liam hadn't done all that much differently, thank God, but looking at Harry now Louis wished they'd worked a miracle to make him worthy of such beauty at his side. Sure, Harry said he looked great, but Harry was supposed to say things like that. "So where are we going?"

"I'm not telling you that." Harry waved at the group clustered around them and stepped outside, Louis turning back to give panicked eyes to his buddies. Niall patted him on the shoulder, Liam mouthed "Have fun" at him, and then he was alone with Harry-or as alone as he could get with a camera crew following their every move.

"You afraid of heights?" Harry asked, reaching back for Louis' hand.

Louis allowed it, more out of nerves than anything else, and shook his head. "Not as far as I know. I might change my mind if we're going to be suspended over a pit of alligators."

"No," Harry laughed, squeezing Louis's hand in reassurance. "Not today, anyway. Just a quick ride in the air."

They turned a corner of the house and Louis' eyes widened. The rotors of a helicopter started turning, making speech impossible as they ran toward it and hopped in. Harry passed Louis a headset, instructing him to put it on, and after belting in they were being lifted into the air.

Louis let out a gasp, instinctively grabbing Harry's hand.

"First time?" Harry asked, trying not to laugh.

"Yes. Don't make fun of me."

"I'm not! I think it's cute."

Louis turned a glare on him and Harry laughed outright.

"I've been on planes before, just not helicopters."

"Helicopters are cool, dude. It's like being in a plane, only you're in this little bubble. Not much separating you from the sky."

"Really, Harry? That's supposed to make me feel better?"

"Relax," Harry chuckled, squeezing Louis' hand tighter before loosening his grip. "Just look around. Look down at L.A., how beautiful is. At night it'll be even better."

Louis took a deep breath and managed to follow Harry's suggestion, distracted from his fluttery stomach immediately. Harry was wrong, this was nothing like being on a plane. They were closer to the ground and everything was so clear. He felt like they were floating, or maybe flying on a magic carpet, as he recognized landmarks from the few years he'd lived in Los Angeles.

"Look, there's the observatory! And the Hollywood sign!"

"See? Cool, right? Look over here."

Louis did, leaning across Harry for a better view. He took in a few more familiar sights before feeling a hand on his back. He said nothing but his heart was pounding hard by the time it started sliding up toward his hair. Turning his face, Louis was startled to find Harry's so close, Harry's lips inches from his own.

"I really want to kiss you," Harry breathed, fingers tightening in Louis' hair.

After a long moment, Louis sat up and back. "I told you. I don't kiss on the first date."

"Technically this is our second."

Louis tried to ignore the fingers still in his hair and how amazing they felt moving against his scalp. "Technically, that wasn't a date and there were a ton of other guys around."

"You're gonna be a tough one to crack, aren't you?"

Louis shrugged, staring out his side of the helicopter. Harry made him more nervous than the helicopter had, and he wasn't sure he liked that.

"I know I came on strong the first night, freaking out, but I was so surprised. I didn't expect you and honestly, you're one of my favorite players. Imagine meeting one of your idols when you least expected it. Wouldn't you have freaked out?"

"It's not that."

"It's not?"

Louis sighed, wishing Harry would just shut up for five minutes to let him gain control over his emotions. It didn't help that the fingers were still moving, making Louis want to lay his head on Harry's shoulder and kiss him until they couldn't breathe. "Can we just enjoy this and not talk about kissing for a while?"

"Fine. But I'm not giving up. Just give me a chance, okay?"

Louis knew Harry had to be confused. He'd come here to win the heart of the Bachelor but instead was pushing him away. How could Louis explain it was Harry himself that was the problem? His lifestyle, his persona, his apparent habit of sleeping around? Louis just couldn't wrap his head around that, nor could he shake the feeling Harry was going to break everyone's heart by the time this was over. "I am. This is weird for me. I-hey look, it's the Staples Center! Are you taking me to work, Harry?" he teased.

" _Former_ workplace," Harry corrected. "L.A. misses you, by the way. You should work out a trade and come back."

"I miss L.A. too, didn't have much say in that trade. My G.M. said he hated to lose me, but he got three defensive players the team sorely needed. So of course now they're a bitch to beat." As the helicopter started dipping toward the Center, Louis' eyes narrowed. "I was joking. Are you really taking me to a soccer game?"

"No, they aren't playing tonight. But there are other teams who play here, you know."

Louis saw purple and gold everywhere among the crowds moving toward the stadium and felt a tiny bit better, but not much. A Lakers game wouldn't be as bad as a Galaxy game would've been, but he still might run into people he knew. "Did we really have to use the helicopter to get to the other side of town?"

"No, but it was fun, wasn't it? Admit it, you enjoyed it."

Surprisingly, Louis had. He was looking forward to the next ride to take them home. "Maybe a little."

"You loved it," Harry grinned as the helicopter touched down on the roof. "Come on." After removing their headsets, Harry grabbed Louis' hand and they jumped out to rush to the roof entrance, Louis leaving his backpack in the chopper.

Of course once they got downstairs there was a camera crew waiting, but Louis tried to ignore that.

"I'm letting you choose. Box or floor seats?"

The question caught Louis off guard. Floor seats were definitely more fun, but that would mean they'd be visible to the world. Weren't they supposed to be keeping this discreet? Louis knew some of his former teammates would probably be in attendance as well, and the idea of them thinking he'd date a man like Harry Styles made him cringe. "Um...box?"

"Whatever you want."

Thirty minutes later they were ensconced in a luxury box, watching the basketball game from above as they were plied with drinks and fancy foods. It wasn't anything Louis hadn't done before, but it felt different this time, probably because he had a gorgeous man at his side.

Harry was a blast to watch a game with. He knew the players, he knew the plays, and he hollered the way Louis did when he disagreed with a call from the ref. When a shot was made they cheered and high-fived, and cussed up a storm when the opposing team had the nerve to score. In between periods they discussed what they might've done differently and some of the more amazing plays they'd witnessed, downing beers until Louis had almost forgotten that he was on a date with a man he was trying to discourage but not so much that he wasn't given a rose; it was a fine line.

The Lakers won. The mood was buoyant as they left the box, Harry holding Louis' hand to lead him back up to the roof.

"So you had fun?" Harry asked after the headsets were back on and the chopper was in the air.

"So much fun! Makes me wish I still lived in L.A."

"You could, you know. I could make that happen."

The atmosphere changed in a heartbeat, Louis glancing over to find Harry's eyes full of something like hope. "Harry..."

"I mean, I'm not allowed to tell you what I'm feeling, can't give any real clues, but I _can_ tell you I've never met anyone like you. I haven't figured out yet why you're so closed off, but I need you to give me a chance."

Looking out his side of the helicopter, Louis sighed. Harry wasn't making this easy. "Even if you chose me in the end, I wouldn't just magically give up my career, or my team. And you're always traveling anyway, we'd hardly see each other."

"Don't assume things about me."

"How is that an assumption? Your career requires you to travel the world."

"You don't know my plans for the future."

"Oh, so what? You're giving up modeling?"

"I never said that, and would it kill you to look at me when I'm speaking to you?"

_Yes. It just might._ Louis shifted in the seat enough to give Harry his attention. "I'm sorry."

"Am I right in assuming you came on the show to fall in love?"

After a hesitation, Louis bit his lip and nodded, unable to meet Harry's eyes.

"So the problem is _me_. Which makes no sense, because what have I ever done to you? Have we met before and I forgot? Maybe a long time ago? Oh shit, did I fuck you and leave you?"

Louis wasn't sure whether to laugh or be offended. "No. We've never met before yesterday."

"Okay, so what's the problem?"

"It's...me. Okay? It's me."

"Then let me fix you. And if it has to do with things you might've read about me, don't believe that shit. None of it's true."

"Oh, so you don't sleep around all the time?"

"No, I totally do that."

Rolling his eyes, Louis returned to staring down at the mass of lights below them.

"But people change, Louis. Don't assume you know what I'm feeling or what I want. And most importantly, let me sweep you off your feet."

Harry's hand slid over to cover Louis', fingers intertwining with his. Louis wasn't sure he liked what it was doing to his heart.

"Please. Let me in."

The whispered words sent shivers down his spine, leaving Louis breathless. Had Harry tried to kiss him in that moment, he wouldn't have been able to resist. Instead the sudden dipping of the helicopter distracted them both, Louis letting out a cry of surprise and squeezing Harry's hand tight.

"Hope you like stars, because we're eating under them."

The chopper was setting them down near the Griffith Observatory, high on top of a mountain overlooking the city. They stepped out in front of the camera crew, which was of course in place and waiting, then headed into the building.

"This way," Harry said, pulling Louis along past the exhibits.

"Where is everybody?"

"It's closed tonight. For us. If you want to after dinner we can check this stuff out, but let's eat first. I'm starving."

Louis was, too. They'd munched on finger foods at the game, but he was ravenous for an actual meal and prayed it wasn't something he'd hate.

Harry opened the door to the balcony area, leading Louis to a table set up amidst flowers of every color and elegantly twinkling lights strung around the place. There were of course candles burning, glorious white ones that stood out brightly in the shadows.

Stopping to simply stare, Louis breathed, "Harry. Wow."

"You like it?" Harry beamed. "Come here. Sit down." He pulled a chair out for Louis, motioning for him to sink into it.

Louis did slowly, feeling numb. This was the sort of thing he'd dreamed of but never shared with anyone, fearing he would be mistaken as "girly," but he was a sucker for romance. How was it possible that this man could be a perfect buddy to watch a game with and then shift effortlessly into a romantic date? "Did you do all this or was it the show?"

"Well, the show provided it all." Harry took a seat across from Louis and picked up the bottle of wine that was chilling. "But I outlined what I wanted. I hope it's not too uh...you know."

When Harry blushed, Louis' heart melted against his will. "Girly?"

"Well...yeah. Is it?"

Even if Harry's face hadn't looked as if his entire fate rested on the answer (which, in a weird way Louis supposed it kind of did), Louis would have reached out for his hand. He rubbed his thumb over the back of Harry's left hand and said, "It's perfect." And he meant it.

A smile of such boyish charm spread across Harry's face that Louis was taken aback as Harry asked, "Wine?"

"Yes. Thank you." He lifted his glass for Harry, thinking that this was a side of Harry Styles the world never got to see. Had Liam and Niall been right? Was there more to him than Louis had assumed? "Tell me about yourself."

"I'm a model. I love to watch soccer in my spare time."

"I knew that. Ever play?"

"Never. I'm be a disaster on the pitch." After pouring his own glass of wine, Harry set the bottle down and leaned back, gesturing toward someone behind Louis. In seconds there were salads before them. "Have you played all your life?"

"Pretty much, yeah. My mom signed me up when I was five and I never stopped. Why don't you play?"

"I wasn't into sports much after junior high. I played basketball for a while, and baseball, too. Wasn't very good though. Then I started getting into drama, did a lot of acting and singing."

"Seriously? How'd you end up modeling?"

"Look at this face. Any other career would be a waste of it."

Louis spluttered a laugh, grabbing a napkin to wipe his mouth. "You really are as cocky as you seem."

"It's not cocky when it's the truth. Why act modest when we all know I'm right? If you've got the tools, use them. Your tools are for soccer. Mine are to look pretty."

"But modeling is about more than your face, right? You have to have the confidence to pull it off, the ability to present an image."

"Have you met me, Louis? I've got what it takes, which is why I'm so successful with it."

"You don't ever think there's something else you'd rather do? Something that might be more fun?"

"Modeling _is_ fun for me. It's a lot of pressure, and a lot of work to keep myself looking as good as I do, but once I step out on that runway it's all worth it. And let's not forget the magazine shoots I get to do, the commercials, and all the parties I'm invited to, all the free clothes I get. Why _wouldn't_ anyone want that?"

"Don't you ever just want to be normal?"

Harry sat back in his seat, setting his fork down. "I don't know that I've ever been normal. From the time I was a kid, people were calling me a fag. I'd date girls and it never made a difference. I was made fun of for the singing, for the musicals I was in. But I don't see any of that as a problem. It just guided me where I belonged, which is where I am now."

"And you're completely happy with your life."

"Completely."

After setting down his empty wine glass, which Harry promptly refilled, Louis asked, "Then why in the world would you go on a show like 'The Bachelor'? Something must be missing."

Harry didn't answer right away. When he did, it was in a confidential manner. He leaned forward and said quietly, "Would you believe I'm lonely?"

"Even though you sleep with a million guys?"

"And girls. But yes. I didn't realize I was until recently. My stylist got me thinking about my life, made me look around at it and notice what was missing. I kind of hate her for that, but here I am."

Louis was a bit stunned. Harry had gone through the exact same thing he had, suddenly taking a look at his life and seeing that there was something missing. "You were too busy to really notice before, right?"

"Exactly. I _kept_ myself busy. And I love sex, okay? I'm not gonna lie. I get it whenever I can, and when it's offered to me as much as it is, hell yeah I'm gonna take it. But I'm always careful and I do have standards."

"And you're ready to just give that up? Because we're all looking for someone who's faithful. I haven't talked to most of the guys in the house, but I'm pretty sure that's a common standard for us."

Harry chewed his lip, waiting until their salad plates were replaced with prime rib dinners that had Louis salivating. Finally Harry replied, "Lou—she's my stylist, and also my best friend—she says I haven't met the right man yet, that once I do I won't want anybody else. I'm looking for that, because I'm not sure it exists. If it does, though?" he said softly. "Then yeah. That's what I want."

_Jesus Christ, do not make me fall in love with you._ Without intending to, Louis slid his hand across the table and lifted Harry's to his lips. "It's out there, Harry. I don't know if it's me you're meant to be with, but it's out there. If you open yourself up to it, you'll find it." The look in Harry's eyes made him want to fly out of his chair and pull Harry into a gentle kiss, show him that there was more to physical contact that lust.

"Please let me kiss you tonight," Harry whispered. "Just one before I let you go again."

His heart dragged him closer to Harry, but his mind forced him to sit back in the chair and let go of Harry's hand. "Eat," he urged softly. "We've still got some time."

Disappointment cropped up in Harry's gaze but he returned to his dinner, and there was a long silence between them while both tried to get a handle on their emotions. The food helped, giving them something to focus on, and when Louis' eyes spied the rose on a nearby table that he'd missed before, he wasn't worried about it; he knew Harry would ask him to stay. What he didn't know was whether or not he'd say yes.

_Oh, who am I kidding? I'm not going anywhere._ Liam and Niall needed him, and he couldn't fool himself into believing that he didn't want to be around Harry anymore. Every second that passed it was harder and harder to keep his eyes off the man before him, so beautiful and so much deeper than he'd wanted to imagine.

"You don't seem to be hurting in any way. What sort of injury did you suffer?"

The question surprised Louis, seemingly coming out of nowhere. "My knee. It still hurts sometimes if I walk on it too much, but mostly it's fine. I didn't need surgery or anything, thank God."

"So on our next date I'll have to make sure we don't do a lot of climbing or running. Got it."

Louis ignored the hint, but his heart fluttered at the idea of being alone with Harry again.

"So where do you live? In San Jose?"

"For now, yes. I'm originally from Chicago."

"Is that where your family is?"

"Yeah. My mom and sisters. I don't talk to my dad. Long story I'm not getting into."

"That's fine. I don't talk to mine, either."

"Problems with the gay thing?"

"No, he's just an asshole. Mom's supportive, though. Loves me very much. I just hope she doesn't scare you away when the time comes."

"Oh? Planning to keep me around to the last round, Harry?"

Harry blinked, obviously not aware he'd let that slip. "You never know, right? You might end up one of the last two. If you don't leave on your own first."

"Or if you don't send me home first. As you meet more of these guys, you might find someone you like better, someone you can really fall in love with. There are a few great ones."

"Like Liam and Niall?" Harry smiled. "I can tell you get along with them well. They seem like good guys."

"They are. Don't get so fixated on one person that you ignore the rest."

"Trust me, I won't. I don't have any idea what to expect over the next few weeks. I came into this thinking it would be a piece of cake. Now I'm starting to get that it's going to be extremely hard to make these decisions as time goes on. I don't want to hurt anybody."

"It's going to happen. I hate to say that, but hearts will be broken. Just...don't be cruel to anyone, okay? Remember that we all have feelings."

"Why do you think I'm such a monster, Louis? Because I sleep around?"

"I don't think you're a monster."

"Your opinion of me isn't that great. I wish you'd forget everything you think you know about me and just let me show you that I'm worthy of your attention."

"I do think you're worthy. I just-"

"Then quit fighting me. I know you want to kiss me, I can see it in your eyes. Let it happen, Louis. Please. We don't have a lot of time here, even if I wanted to just say fuck everyone else and run away with you I couldn't. Our time together is short." Harry reached over and picked up the rose, holding it out to Louis. "And I'm not ready to give up on you yet. Will you accept this rose? Please?"

Louis had every intention of accepting it, but at the moment he couldn't even find words. No one had ever looked at him the way Harry was, with such devotion and hope and it left him speechless.

"Wait. Kiss me before you answer. Just kiss me first, and if you really don't feel anything, I'll let you go. But do that for me. Please."

"I don't need to kiss you," Louis said softly. He stood up next to the table, pulling Harry up with him. "Yes. I'll take it."

Harry's fingers shook slightly as he fastened it, and once it was in place Harry tilted Louis' chin up. Louis' heart was crashing in his chest when their lips met, and it wasn't aggressive or sleazy at all, it was a sweet, passionate kiss that made him lift his hands up to slide into Harry's hair to deepen it. His tongue found its way into Harry's mouth, Harry letting out a little moan and opening himself to it, and when they finally pulled apart neither could breathe properly. Harry wrapped his arms around Louis and hugged him close, the relief evident. "Thank you," he whispered.

"Don't thank me. Just don't make me regret this."

"I won't. I swear."

"You can't promise things. You're going to fall for them, for so many of them. It's not going to be easy, Harry."

"None of them are you."

"But some of them are more than me."

"But right now I'm with you. Were you finished with your dinner?"

Dinner? What was dinner? Mentally returning to their surroundings, Louis replied, "Uh...yeah. Was there more planned?"

"Did you want to see the exhibits?"

"Whatever you want."

"I _want_ to just keep kissing you."

Louis chuckled and stepped back, reaching for Harry' hand. "Let's walk around."

Their conversation was lighter as they wandered the observatory, neither of them huge astronomy fans but finding it fascinating anyway. They also spent time simply staring out over the city, Louis reiterating how much he missed Los Angeles and that it had become home to him when he lived there before. Harry managed to sneak in a few kisses, which Louis returned, but the more they kissed the less they wanted to stop, until finally Louis said, "We should go. It's getting late and you have a big date tomorrow."

"Right. The group date. That's definitely going to tire me out."

"Anything exciting planned?"

"I can't tell you. But it'll be fun."

"All those guys fighting to get your attention? Yeah, you'll love it."

"It's not all of them. Only six."

"Still. You'll love it."

"Yeah, I will," Harry grinned. "I wish you could come, though. I don't even know when I'll have you alone again. That's what sucks about this."

"I'll be around. You can steal me away from the crowd for a few minutes, sneak a few kisses in."

"Definitely on my list of things to do." Harry leaned in to kiss Louis just before they stepped into the helicopter again, belting in and then they were on the way back to the mansion.

Two minutes in, Harry attacked Louis' lips, Louis kissing him back eagerly as they both knew their time was limited. Louis kept wanting to pull Harry onto his lap but couldn't due to the seat belts and the confined space, and it frustrated him to know that within minutes Harry would be out of his reach, for weeks possibly. How would he handle watching Harry date other guys and know he was kissing them, know he was probably falling in love with them? All of the drama-filled moments he'd witnessed while watching the show in the past came back to him and suddenly made sense; it was no wonder the girls cried and raged at each other, Louis would be tempted to punch anyone who touched Harry after tonight.

_What was I thinking, coming into something like this? This is what Mom was talking about—I'm going to get my heart broken. Damn you, Harry Styles, why couldn't you be the horrible person I thought you were?_

Once the helicopter touched down Louis pulled back, but Harry grabbed him and dragged him in again. "Not done with you yet."

They kissed for another five minutes, Louis getting more heated until he shoved Harry away, knowing if he didn't now he wasn't going to. "Go. You have to go."

Harry took a deep, calming breath and stepped out of the helicopter, walking Louis to the door of the mansion in silence but holding his hand tight. "Thank you," he said when they stopped. "That's probably the best date I've ever been on."

Louis nodded in agreement. "I'll never forget it, that's for sure." There was so much he wanted to say suddenly-apologies for his initial prejudice, gratitude for the wonderful time they'd had together, and that part of him he wasn't willing to acknowledge that was screaming at him to beg Harry for another date. Instead he simply said, "Goodnight, Harry."

"Goodnight."

When Harry leaned forward for one last kiss, Louis met it softly, and it was like their first kiss had been—passionate, but almost hesitant in its sweetness. It was over too soon, and Louis opened the door with one last glance over his shoulder. Harry waved, and then the door was closed.

* * *

The living room went dead silent when Louis walked in. He was met with hard stares from almost everyone, and as his emotions were already so jumbled and uncertain it was the last thing he wanted to deal with. Turning toward the stairs that led up to their rooms, Louis' momentum stopped at Liam's voice ringing out to him.

"Louis! We're gonna check out that jacuzzi, come join us!"

He twisted around to find Liam near the patio door, Niall standing nearby and silently inviting Louis over with his eyes.

Hefting the backpack higher on his shoulder, Louis walked through the living room with his back straight and head high, not acknowledging the silent faces watching him. Liam slid an arm over his shoulder while Niall closed the patio door behind them, and when Louis noted a few guys in the pool he almost turned back but Niall gripped his elbow and steered him over to the jacuzzi, where he dropped his pack on a table.

Liam stripped out of his shirt, having already changed into swim trunks, and Niall did the same. Louis kicked off his shoes and slowly pulled off his pants, leaving himself in boxers and the button-down while the other two slid into the jacuzzi, making noises of contentment.

"Come on, dude, join us. It's amazing in here."

A smile stretched Louis' lips. It was strange how a few words from Liam seemed to make everything alright, or at the very least a little better. He shrugged out of both shirts, got rid of his socks, and then was sliding down into the water between them, the waterfall from the neighboring pool loud enough so that they could talk quietly without being overheard.

"Hey," he said to them, finally feeling himself start to relax.

"Long night?" Niall asked in an attempt to get Louis talking.

"It was...not at all what I expected."

Liam nodded. "So you like him."

"That's...yeah. I guess I do."

"You know that's okay, right?" When Louis didn't answer, Niall continued. "You're _supposed_ to like him. That's why we all came here. I can tell you feel guilty about it, and that's ridiculous."

"I don't feel guilty," Louis sighed. "I just didn't expect to feel this way."

"Uh oh. Someone's falling in love," Liam sang lightly.

Louis was quiet again, so Niall asked, "Where did he take you?"

"To a Lakers game. And then we had dinner at the observatory."

Two gaping mouths met those words.

"You got to go to a basketball game?" Liam whined.

"He took you to see the stars?" Niall said at the same time.

Louis chuckled. "Yeah, both things were pretty cool."

"Damn. I wonder where my date's gonna be."

"I wonder if I'll even get a date before he sends me home."

"Niall," Louis began, "you're gonna get a date. And Liam, I'm sure your date will be amazing, too."

"Did you kiss him?" Liam asked. Louis' eyes cut away, and Liam answered the question for him. "You did. Wow. Is he a good kisser?"

Niall jumped in. "Liam, what kind of question is that?"

"It's a valid question, Niall. Some hot guys aren't great kissers."

"I wouldn't know."

"You've kissed hot guys before, haven't you?"

"I don't know that you'd call him hot."

"Him? Has there only been one, Niall?"

Louis rejoined the conversation. "You didn't tell him anything, Niall?"

"I was married," Niall responded, for Liam' benefit.

"To a girl?"

"Yes, Liam. To a girl."

"Wow. What happened?"

"She passed away. I decided that if I was going to try again, it might as well be with a man because that's what I'm truly attracted to."

"So you've never been with a man?"

"No."

"Oh damn. Make sure you tell Harry that on your date, I bet he'd love to break you in."

"Why do you have to make it about sex?"

"Liam has a point, Niall," Louis offered. "A lot of guys like being your first one. Then again, some guys don't because it can be really awkward."

"I'm not sure that's helping me feel better, Louis."

Shrugging, Louis said, "I was just making a point. And how did you two spend an entire evening together and not talk about yourselves? I figured by now you two would know everything about each other."

"Well, we spent most of the evening defending you," Niall answered with a rueful smile.

"I was right the first night, Louis. Those guys are assholes."

"Not all of them," Niall corrected. "But yeah. Most of them. They think it's unfair that you're here."

Louis sighed again. "I understand why they feel that way, but it's not my fault. I didn't know it was going to be him, and I certainly didn't know about his soccer fetish."

"Still," Niall reasoned, "you do have an unfair advantage. He was already enamored with you before you even opened your mouth. It makes things harder for everyone else." At Louis' surprised look, he added, "I'm not saying I resent you for it. But I get why they're upset."

"They need to get over it," Liam argued. "Yeah, maybe Harry liked him right away because of who he is, but that can fade. Once he gets over the excitement of meeting his idol, Louis will be just another guy like the rest of us and then Harry will fall in love with someone else."

Louis kept his face neutral as Liam spoke, but the words trampled on his heart to leave him feeling suffocated. It was the same thing he'd said to Harry, basically, what he'd in fact encouraged Harry to do, but it wasn't what he wanted anymore; Louis wanted Harry to love him, and suddenly he understood that the next five weeks were going to be pure hell.

"Liam, you don't have to be rude about it."

"How is that rude, Niall? It's the truth."

"It's obvious Louis really cares about Harry, there's no need to make him feel like he doesn't have a chance."

"I never said he doesn't have a chance."

"You might as well have."

"I'm just saying-"

"Guys, it's fine!" Louis interrupted, holding up a dripping hand. "I know what Liam means. And he's right. Tonight was great, but now Harry is going to spend time with everyone else and find the one he's supposed to be with. It's best he got me out of the way first."

Niall studied Louis as if searching for clues, Louis again feeling like he was being analyzed like a lab rat. He lifted himself up out of the jacuzzi and onto the tiled edge. "I'm going to bed. Don't stay up too late, guys, I think the date card comes around nine tomorrow. You get a whole day with him."

"If we get picked," Liam reminded him. "He only gets six of us tomorrow."

"You'll get picked," Louis assured Liam. "Best first impression, right?"

"True." With a grin Liam splashed water toward Niall. "Lighten up, maybe you'll get picked, too."

Niall splashed water back in Liam's direction, annoyed. "I'm not worried about it."

"So you don't care if you get picked or not?"

"Of course I care. I'm just not going to worry about it. If it's meant to be, it will be. Isn't that what your mom says?"

Liam smiled. "You're right! But I still think you're worried about it."

"I'm not worried, Liam."

"Goodnight, guys." Louis stood up, reaching for a towel from a nearby pile.

"Wait," Liam called out. "You didn't tell us about your date."

"Yes, I did. Basketball and the stars. It was a ball on top of the world, just like the card said."

"But...you kissed?"

Louis expected Niall to tell Liam to back off at any second, and would have welcomed it. Instead Niall stared up at Louis, waiting in silence for an answer even though it was obvious he felt it wasn't their business.

"Yes," Louis finally responded. He picked up his clothes from the table where he'd dropped them.

"A lot?" Liam pressed.

"A few times," Louis conceded. He lifted the backpack over his shoulder and grabbed his shoes.

"How many times is a few times?"

Avoiding Liam's question, Louis said, "Goodnight, guys."

"Goodnight, Louis," Niall answered.

Grateful that Niall wasn't prodding him, Louis gave him a tiny smile and walked into the house, once again ignoring the silence that fell as he made his way to the stairs.

"They kissed a lot," Liam commented when Louis was gone.

"I think so."

"Something changed. He doesn't hate Harry anymore."

"No, he seems a bit overwhelmed."

"Did you notice he was wearing the rose?"

"Of course. He wouldn't even be here if he wasn't. Did you really think he wasn't going to get it?"

Liam shrugged. "If he was rude enough to Harry, he might've been sent home. Part of me thought that would happen."

"I never thought he wouldn't be offered the rose, but I wasn't sure he'd take it. I guess there's a side to Harry we haven't seen yet, if he can win Louis over."

Nodding slowly, Liam remarked, "We've got some serious competition, dude."

Niall didn't respond, but he knew the contest had just gotten a lot more difficult.


	5. Chapter 5

Once everyone had gathered in the living room the following morning, Louis opened the envelope. "'Race me to the bottom for a chance to win my heart. Jerry... Peter... Mike... Liam...'" Louis stopped to wait for the victory cry he knew was coming, and once it was over he continued with a grin. "'Scott... and Niall.'" Glancing up, Louis caught Niall's shoulders dropping as the tension was released.

"Race me?" Peter mused. "Are we doing a NASCAR date?"

"It wouldn't be the first time," Niall commented. "They did that in one season I saw, got to drive the cars and everything."

Liam's face lit up. "That would be so cool! I've always wanted to do that."

Mike tossed out, "What about the bottom thing, though?"

"Maybe it's an innuendo," Scott leered. "He likes to bottom."

Niall rolled his eyes before pulling Liam off the couch. "Come on, let's go get ready." They were halfway up the stairs, the other guys rushing past them now, when Niall halted. "Louis, you coming? We might need you."

With a grin Louis followed them into their room, grateful he hadn't been excluded now that he was the front-runner. Of course he'd always been that, he supposed, but at this point if Harry had to choose he knew he'd win. All of that could change today.

"You seem better," Niall remarked as Louis glanced through Niall's shirts, looking for one that would accent his eyes. "A good night's sleep helped?"

"I guess. I bet you look hot in yellow. Get over here."

A knock on the door had them all looking up in surprise. Liam opened it and Peter gushed, "Chris just called. He said to be ready in an hour and dress warm."

"Cool! Thanks!"

Niall frowned once the door was closed. "Dress warm? But it's supposed to be seventy-five today. Unless..." He met Liam's eyes, both of them grinning.

"Snow date!" Liam yelled. "It has to be!"

"I love the snow! Okay, Louis, I have a yellow sweater in there. Let's do this."

Louis couldn't help feeling a bit of jealousy, but he shared their excitement as they prepared for the date, making sure each of them looked good enough to eat while Niall made sure they had everything they might need. Louis reminded them that it was important to also ensure they spent time with Harry today. "There will be those who want to hog him. Don't let that happen, be sure to get your moments with him, too. And if you can't, because Scott seems like the sort to cause drama, make sure you talk with Harry tomorrow night at the cocktail party."

"You're so lucky, Louis," Liam marveled. "You already know you're safe. And do you realize that because we were both picked for the group date, that means neither of us gets the one-on-one tomorrow?"

Niall nodded. "Yeah. I'm not sure if that's good or bad. Each time you get a one-on-one, there's a chance he'll send you home."

"There's that chance anyway, Niall," Louis reasoned. "If you get a one-on-one, you have a better chance of connecting with him. You _want_ the one-on-one."

"I know. Okay, we should head downstairs to wait, it's almost ten."

"Wait." Louis pulled Liam into a tight hug, then Niall. "For luck. You guys are gonna be great, and he's gonna love you."

They smiled at him, both surprised, before Liam said, "To love."

"To love," Niall and Louis repeated, and then they went down to meet their fate.

* * *

Louis wasn't sure what to expect when Harry walked through the door. He knew Harry wasn't allowed to show him any favor or to give any clue about his feelings in front of the other men, but he hoped to at least be acknowledged. Thinking this might be the last time he was the treasured one in Harry's eyes, Louis needed that much-some kind of reassurance that the night before hadn't been a dream.

Meeting everyone's eyes with a bright grin, Harry's gaze lingered on Louis' for a few seconds before moving on, and Louis released an inner breath. It was still there. That of course didn't mean anything, he hadn't spent time with anyone else yet. It helped, though.

"You guys all ready?" Harry asked, and the six moved out with him, Harry holding the door for them as they filed past. Before he slipped through the door he glanced back at Louis again. "Hey," he said softly.

"Hi. Have fun. Be nice to my boys."

Harry grinned. "I'll be a perfect gentleman." He waved at the remaining guys in the room, and then was gone.

Feeling the atmosphere turn sour once the door was closed and all eyes were on him, Louis headed out to the pool area and donned his headphones; he'd expected this, and planned to spend the day getting some sun and talking to no one.

* * *

Louis had been correct—Jerry and Mike immediately made room for Harry in the limo between them, Harry settling into place with a smile, and then they proceeded to keep him engaged in conversation. Scott and Peter attempted to join in a few times, and succeeded briefly before Harry was again distracted by Jerry and Mike. Across the limo from Harry, Niall and Liam talked quietly amongst themselves and commented on the passing scenery. Niall kept expecting Liam to insert himself in the conversation, forcing Harry to pay attention to him, but Liam seemed distracted as well.

"What's wrong?" Niall asked in a whisper.

"Nothing."

"Talk to me."

"I think we're going skiing."

"Probably."

"That's bad."

"Why?"

"Because I've never done that before. I'm gonna look like an idiot."

Harry interrupted them. "Hey hey hey, no whispering over there. I get paranoid and think you're talking about me," he joked. "Does my hair look okay?"

Everyone laughed, the atmosphere warming slightly. "You're beautiful," Liam answered with a smile, eyes twinkling. "But I think you knew that."

"I've heard it a few times, yes," Harry responded with a smirk, gaze riveted to Liam.

The flirtatious vibe was so strong Niall felt as if he should leave for a moment, but of course that was impossible. How was he supposed to compete with that? The other guys were still smiling but it looked forced, and though Niall knew how they felt, he refused to let them tear Liam down the way they did Louis.

"Where are we headed?" he asked, trying to defuse the tension.

"It's a surprise," Harry beamed, gaze swinging over to Niall.

"Aww, no hints?" Jerry pleaded.

"Not a one. Niall, how about you break out that champagne in the compartment next to you? I don't care that it's not even noon, we're here to have fun."

That was met with approval from all sides, and Niall passed around glasses while Liam popped the cork and poured for everyone. After that the conversation involved the entire group, and Niall had to admire the way Harry continued that, pulling him and Liam into the conversation when they started to sink into their little bubble again.

Eventually they started climbing into the mountains and Liam dropped out of the conversation again. Niall knew better than to hold Liam's hand, which is probably what Louis would've done and what he was tempted to do, but he did manage to squeeze Liam's leg surreptitiously. "It's gonna be fine," he whispered. "I won't leave you alone."

Liam merely nodded.

"You're not scared, are you?"

"Not of skiing, but of looking like an idiot. He won't want me then."

"Then he doesn't deserve you."

The smile Liam responded with had Niall's own lips curving up, and Harry once again commented on their whispering.

"Sorry," Niall apologized. "It's not about you, I promise."

Harry turned the flirty tone on him. "Maybe it should be."

Niall's breath stopped when Harry looked at him like that, eyes promising something that Niall could only dream of as his body responded to the words. He swallowed and looked away, unused to such open flirtation, and then the moment was gone as Scott spied the ski lift rising up the mountain. "Are we going skiing?"

Harry grinned. "We are. Hope you guys can keep up, because I'm pretty damn fast." He looked at Liam in challenge, waiting for him to make a comeback because it was a Liam thing to do, and when Liam remained silent he frowned.

"I've never been skiing," Liam confessed. "But I can make a great snowman!"

"Oh, that's no big deal. I'll teach you. And then we'll have a snowman contest, because mine happen to be the best."

"Oh, it's on," Liam laughed, and immediately he was better.

After they stepped out of the limo, Niall squeezed Liam's shoulder. "See? It'll be fine. He's going to teach you. Now you get extra attention from him."

"Yeah, that worked out well, huh?" Liam bounded ahead to catch up with Harry, who already had an arm over Mike's shoulders but welcomed Liam in with the other.

"And just like that, Liam steals the date," Peter whined.

"It's not his fault he's never been skiing."

"Yeah, but now Harry is gonna be all over him, making sure he's okay. Don't act like it doesn't bother you, Niall. Just because he's your buddy, that doesn't mean you can't be jealous of him."

"If he and Harry are meant to be together, I'll live with it. No reason to hate Liam for it."

"I don't hate him, but come on. It's obvious Harry is attracted to him."

"I thought Louis was the one you were all so worried about."

"We don't know what happened last night. Did Louis spill anything?"

"He said Harry was nothing like he expected," was all Niall was willing to share.

"What does that mean?"

"It means it went well, basically."

"And you're not jealous of that?" Scott interrupted, having been eavesdropping.

"Of course I'm jealous. Just like I'm a little jealous that Liam is probably going to get the rose today. But again—I don't hate him for it, and if they're meant to be...you know? We knew coming into this the competition would be fierce."

"Do you even _want_ to win this, Niall?" Scott asked. "You hardly talk to him, act like you don't care either way. That gives him the wrong idea, you know."

"I'm not worried about it. There's either a connection or there's not. I'll get at least a little time alone with him today, and we'll see how it goes."

The other two looked at each other and shook their heads, unable to understand how Niall could be so calm about it.

Inside, though, he wasn't calm. He was nervous because every time Harry looked at him his heart flipped over and his stomach fluttered. He didn't know if it was because Harry was gorgeous or because he was supposed to feel that way about the Bachelor, or if it was because there _was_ a connection. He hoped it was the latter.

As they'd predicted, Harry gave an inordinate amount of time to Liam, showing him everything he needed to know and taking him through the motions, even skiing along next to him until he was confident enough to do it on his own. The remaining guys hit the slopes, bitter that Liam was hogging Harry for himself. Niall helped where he could, offering to take over for Harry after an hour. Harry's kindness toward Liam impressed Niall, as did his ability to keep Liam laughing.

"Why don't we do this together?" Harry suggested after Niall made the offer. "Since the others abandoned us."

Niall wasn't sure how Liam would feel about that, but when Liam smiled and waved him over, Niall joined them. The three took easy slopes, Liam catching on quickly, and after an hour of that Harry offered them an apologetic smile.

"I should probably go find the other guys, soothe some ruffled feathers."

"It's fine, go," Niall nodded. "I think that's a good idea or it will be hell for Liam in the house tonight."

"Meet back at the main cabin in an hour?"

"We'll be there," Liam grinned. "Don't go breaking your leg or anything, I have plans for you."

Harry chuckled and squeezed his shoulder before heading toward the tougher slopes, one of the camera men informing him where to the find the other guys.

"So. I'd say you did well today, Liam."

"I didn't mean to steal him from everyone."

"I know."

"I'm not complaining, though," Liam winked. "And you were here, too, so that was cool."

"Not if you were hoping for time alone with him."

"Are you kidding? You've seen how the group dates work. I'm lucky to only share him with one other person. And a cool person, at that."

Niall's face split into a smile. "Really? You think I'm cool?"

"Hell yeah. I wouldn't have given you my phone number if I didn't think that, dork."

"True. But how can I be both a dork and cool at the same time?"

"You're a cool dork. It happens."

Niall chuckled, leading Liam back to the slope. "Come on, let's ski some more while we can. I miss it."

"You don't do this a lot at home?"

"No, not since...well, there wasn't a lot of time after I married Barbara. We were both pretty busy."

"You still miss her a lot, don't you?"

"Every day. But I know she'd want me to do this. She wouldn't care if..." Hesitating, Niall finally gave in. "You know what? Can we go get some hot chocolate or something? I want to talk to you."

"Sure! My legs are killing me anyway."

They returned to the main cabin early, settling in at the small cafe inside and warming up with hot drinks.

"What's up?"

"I don't know why I feel the need to keep it a secret, it's going to come out anyway and it needs to, it's a big deal. But I um... I have a daughter."

Liam's mouth opened slowly. "You're a dad?"

Niall nodded. "She's five and I want to find a good father for her. I don't know enough about Harry to judge that yet, but I'm afraid he's going to run away when he learns that."

"Hmm. He might. And I'm not saying that to discourage you or anything, I swear! I just don't know that he's looking for a family yet."

"Exactly. And I don't really know how to bring it up, either. I mean, what do you say? 'Don't get attached to me, because I have a kid and you'll probably send me home five minutes after learning that.'"

"Nah, I don't think he'll do that. He likes you, dude. But honestly? I don't think you'll win, either. He doesn't seem to be a family kind of guy."

"Right." Niall sat back, letting out a long breath. "I feel like I should just go home now."

"No, don't do that. We don't know for sure what he wants. Maybe he'll surprise us. Or maybe he's not even the kind of guy you'd _want_ as a dad for your kid, you know?" When Niall shrugged, Liam asked, "Is that why you're afraid to get close to him? Because you're so sure it's not gonna work out?"

"I don't know, maybe. It's also because he makes me nervous."

"Why? Because he's hot?"

"Partly, yes. The way he looks at me... nobody's ever looked at me like that before."

"Yeah, I know what you mean. He's kind of intense, you know?"

"Definitely. And you've got this ability to shoot it right back at him, get him laughing. Louis... I don't know, I haven't seen Louis around him. But I think Louis handles it well. I don't."

"Just relax, Niall. He's a normal guy." Niall lifted an eyebrow in argument, prompting Liam to correct himself. "Okay, so he's not normal. But he's not a god or anything. He's just a guy looking for love."

"I guess."

"What's her name?"

"Huh? Oh. Nola." Niall smiled as the word left his lips.

"I bet you miss her."

"I'm going crazy. They let me talk to her for five minutes each night, and they monitor it and stuff to make sure I'm not saying anything I shouldn't. Last night she asked when I'm coming home and I swear, I almost walked out. I don't know if I can do this for five more weeks, Liam."

"Just think of the long run. If it works out, you'll have a great father for her and a husband for yourself. Or at least a boyfriend."

"I want the whole package. I don't want a fling, I don't want a boyfriend, I want someone who's willing to accept us as a family and devote his life to us the way we will to him. I want a husband."

"Then... I don't know. I'm sorry, I just don't know if Harry is looking for that."

"I know," Niall said again, looking down at his coffee. "Which is why I think I should just leave."

"How about you give him a chance first? See if he's even open to the idea before running away?"

"Yeah, I guess."

Liam gulped down some hot cocoa, hesitating before asking, "Louis knows, doesn't he? You told Louis about Nola."

"Strangely, I did. I told him about her within two minutes of talking to him. I don't know how he makes me so comfortable."

"Louis' just that kind of guy. You trust him automatically, you know? If it doesn't work out with Harry, there's always Louis."

"Except that Harry will probably pick Louis."

"Oh. Yeah. Well then... there's always me and my five dogs," Liam joked. "I bet she'd love my babies."

"Oh, I'm sure she would." Niall ignored the rest of that statement and what Liam was hinting at. As much as he liked Liam, one guy was enough to worry about right now. "She loves animals. Watches Animal Planet constantly. She wants a tiger. And a llama. Oh, and a koala. Did I mention the lemurs, too?" He chuckled fondly. "She dreams big."

"That's the best way to dream, buddy."

Niall met Liam's smile with his own, glad he had at least a friend for life in him.

* * *

The Bachelor group was given their own cabin to gather in for a few hours, with food brought in and a large, warm fireplace that everyone crowded around. The mood was better since Harry had spent time with the other guys, and talk was light as they all ate while settled into cozy couches.

"I see you made good on your promise of a campfire," Liam teased. "But I still demand a tent."

"We've got weeks, don't lose faith in me yet," Harry responded.

"Time's running out, buddy. I'd better get a date next week."

Niall stepped on Liam's foot, letting him know he needed to back off. Harry only smiled.

"I've so got this," Liam whispered to Niall, feeling Harry's eyes on him.

"Cocky bastard," Niall whispered back. "Pass the coffee, I want more."

After the food was done Harry took turns with each of the men, leading them into a separate room overlooking the city below. When Liam entered, he gasped. "It's snowing!"

"It is. I bet you're used to that in New York, though."

"Yeah, but that's in the city. This is different, we're up in the mountains. It's so pretty!"

Harry stepped up behind Liam at the window, sliding his arms around Liam's waist. "Gorgeous."

"I know you're talking about me, you don't have to pretend now that we're alone." Harry laughed, and Liam added, "And you can give me a real kiss now, too. I know you want to."

"Do you believe the shit that comes out of your mouth, or is it all bravado?"

"Mostly bravado," Liam conceded. "I'm just kind of hoping it's true."

"Only kind of?" Harry spun Liam around, keeping his hands at Liam's waist. "Because the kissing thing... that's true."

"Oh. Well then." Suddenly nervous, Liam bit his lip and silently begged Harry to make the first move, because he was frozen.

"Come here," Harry chuckled softly, dipping his head down to press his lips to Liam's.

Liam tried not to think about the fact that Harry had kissed Louis the night before and was probably kissing every man he brought in here. He focused on the way Harry's mouth opened to his, tasted Harry's tongue as it dove into his own mouth and Harry's hands tightened over his hips, pulling him closer. It was definitely the best kiss he'd ever experienced, and when he pulled back it was with wide eyes. "Wow."

"Wow?" Harry giggled. "I get a 'wow'?"

"You get a 'wow.' Because...wow."

"Better than an 'Ew, gross' I guess."

"Much better."

"So now that we kissed, can we talk about other things for a while?"

"Um... can we talk about kissing some more?"

"Possibly."

"Okay, then, let's go for it."

Harry laughed and sat down in an overstuffed chair, pulling Liam sideways onto his lap. "Tell me about yourself. More than just the hot dogs, I want to know about your daily life."

"Well, the hot dogs _are_ my life. As well as my dogs."

"Actual dogs?"

"Yes," Liam chuckled. "I have five of them. Want to see?"

"Five? Wow, that's a lot of fur. Show me."

Liam slid out his wallet, scooting around on Harry's lap to reach it, and they smirked at each other when the movement caused an obvious reaction for Harry.

"Oh, should I do that some more?" Liam teased.

"I'm not gonna stop you."

They both laughed, Liam opening his wallet to show off the pictures. "Okay. These are my babies." He named them all, pointing out each one as he went.

"How did you get all of them to pose like that at the same time?"

"It wasn't easy. Chachi, the tiny one? He kept trying to run off after a squirrel. But we snapped the picture just in time before he took off."

"Wait...Chachi, Richie...what were the other names?"

"Chachi, Richie, Potsie, Fonzie, and-."

"Ralph. As in Ralph Malph."

"Exactly!" Liam beamed. "Wow, usually only older people get that."

"My babysitter watched the show all the time when I was a kid. I had a crush on Joanie."

"Yeah? Don't tell anyone, but I always wanted to be Fonzie."

"Aww, that's kind of cute," Harry smiled, cuddling Liam closer. "You're just kind of cute in general."

"But sexy too, right?"

"Oh, yes," Harry answered, sobering immediately. "Definitely sexy. If you weren't, I wouldn't be hard right now from you sitting on my lap."

Liam leaned in for another kiss, Harry meeting it for a bit before pulling back. "Wait! You're distracting me again! I wanted to hear about your life."

"Oh. Right. Well, I have the dogs. And the hot dogs. And I'm pretty close with my family."

"They all live in New York?"

"Yeah, my sister helps with the business. Which takes up most of my time. My mom's tired of me overworking myself and going home to dogs instead of a husband."

"She pushed you into this?"

"Not really pushed, but... she wouldn't shut up about it," Liam laughed. "I finally just gave in."

Harry stared into Liam's eyes before asking, "Glad you did?"

"Yeah," Liam replied softly. "You're amazing."

Harry seemed to melt, but after one more quick kiss he gently pushed Liam off and stood up. "Sadly, I have others to attend to today. Are we still on for that snowman contest?"

"Of course. You're going down, Styles."

"Oh, we'll see about that." He hugged Liam tight before walking him out of the smaller room and into the main one, where he asked Jerry to join him.

When they were gone, Niall studied Liam. "That went well. I can see it on your face."

"This is the face of a man who's falling in love. God, he's so perfect. He even knows 'Happy Days'!"

"The show?"

"Yes! Ugh, this sucks! Why does he have to be so perfect?"

"Right?" Scott sighed. "I didn't expect to fall so hard this fast. It's gonna suck if I get sent home."

Niall was last to be alone with Harry, and he wasn't sure how to take that. Did it mean Harry wasn't interested? Maybe didn't know what to say to him? When Harry addressed Niall from across the room, Niall stood up nervously and smiled. Harry spun around and left the room, Liam squeezing Niall's hand before he followed.

Harry was seated in a large, comfy chair, of course looking beautiful and intimidating. He gestured toward the loveseat next to him and Niall sat, clasping his hands together.

"Thanks for your help with Liam today."

"No, thank _you_ ," Niall replied. "He was so scared you wouldn't like him because he'd never been on skis before. You were very kind to him, and it made his week. You didn't have to be."

Harry smiled. "Well, Liam is easy to be kind to. You two seem pretty close."

"Yeah, out of everyone he and Louis are the ones I'm closest to."

Something flashed in Harry's eyes when Niall mentioned Louis' name, and as he'd been watching for exactly that, it told Niall a lot. "Louis' a great guy."

"He is." Harry paused, then said, "But I didn't bring you in here to talk about everyone else. I'd like to hear more about you, if that's okay."

"Of course. What do you want to know?"

"See, that's just it. Everyone else volunteers things. You make me work for it."

"I'm sorry," Niall blushed. "I'm typically a private person, so this entire experience is foreign to me."

"I can imagine. Being in the spotlight takes getting used to."

"I had the feeling it's always come naturally to you. The plays in high school, that singing competition..."

"True, I've never shied away from it."

"It can't be easy, being in the media all the time. Are there a lot of lies printed about you?"

Harry smirked. "Is that your polite way of asking if I sleep around?"

Niall blushed yet again. "I didn't mean—I was just-"

"It's okay, Niall, jeez." With a chuckle Harry moved from his chair to the loveseat, Niall scooting over to make room for him, but then Harry wrapped his arms around Niall and pulled him closer. "Loosen up, I was teasing you. Why are you so afraid of me?"

Harry smelled amazing. It was the only coherent thought swimming through his brain. He finally managed, "I'm not afraid."

"Then what is it? I told you, I don't bite. Am I horrible in some way? Is it because you think I do sleep around?"

"No, it's... well, wait. Do you?"

"Honestly?" Harry let go, scooting away some. "I did. Yes. For a lot of years."

"Oh. And now?"

"Now... I don't really know what I want. I've always been that way, I don't know any different."

"Oh," Niall repeated.

"I can't change my past, Niall. I can only promise to do better in the future."

"I wouldn't ask that of you. You have to do what makes you happy, and if being with a lot of men does, then that's what you should do."

Harry cocked his head, eyes narrowing. "You haven't dated much, have you?"

"Me? Uh... no. Not a whole lot. I was married, though."

That shocked him. Stunned, Harry finally asked, "For how long?"

"A few years. We didn't divorce, it just... well. She died."

Blinking and uncertain, Harry remained silent.

"It's okay. I don't like to talk about it, but you have to know these things to make an informed decision. I was married to a woman and I was very much in love."

"Niall, I'm... so sorry." Harry pulled one of Niall's hand between both of his own. "I can't even imagine what that must've been like. Was it sudden?"

"Yes. It was three years ago and it's been tough, but I'm ready now to try again. This time with a man, because even when I was married to her I was still attracted to men and I'm pretty sure that's where I belong."

"That's... a lot to live up to."

Niall nodded, feeling his heart crack. He'd tried so hard to keep it from opening, known from the start it was too much to ask of a man like Harry Styles, and once Harry heard about Nola there would be little-to-no chance. "I know it is. And if you need to send me home, I completely understand. I'm not what you had in mind when you came on this show, I'm sure."

"No, you're not. I won't lie about that. But one thing my best friend urged me to do was to keep an open mind, to not rule out any possibilities before giving them a chance. I keep feeling like you're going to leave, Niall, and I really don't want you to. There's something about you that I can't explain but it keeps me wanting to know more. Trust me. Don't assume things about me or that I don't want the same things you want. The truth is I'm not sure what I want, so I'm open to a lot. Give me a chance to prove myself worthy of you?"

Harry was asking _him_ for a chance? Niall nodded, licking his lips nervously. "Of course. But if you decide I'm not what you're looking for, do me the courtesy of sending me home instead of keeping me around. Please."

"If that does happen, I will. I promise."

"Thank you."

They stared at each other for a while longer, Harry holding Niall's hand in his, until Harry sighed and stood up. "We still have a lot to do before we leave. I never got to race you, either. Up for the challenge?"

"I think I can manage to kick your ass."

"Oh, really?" Harry laughed, surprised. "Bring it."

It wasn't until they were back in the main room that Harry let go of his hand, giving it a brief squeeze before loosening his grip. "Okay guys, we're heading back out to the slopes for a while. I need to kick Niall's ass."

"In your dreams, buddy," Niall smirked, moving to stand near Liam.

"Oh, this is gonna be good!" Liam exclaimed. "I bet Niall's fast on skis!"

"But I'm faster," Harry argued as if that was it, end of story.

"It's true," Mike commented. "Harry is really fast."

Niall made a scoffing noise. "Let's do this."

An hour later Niall was declared the winner after taking three of the five races. "You weren't kidding," he said to Harry at the bottom of the slope. "You really are fast."

"Yes, but you're apparently faster. Guess you're just full of surprises, aren't you?"

Though the words caused Niall's stomach to drop, he smiled. He knew he needed to tell Harry about Nola and felt guilty because he hadn't yet, but he was terrified Harry would send him home. Part of him wanted that, needed it because he missed her so much and if Harry wasn't going to choose him, then the sooner he got back the better. It hadn't felt right, though, in that room where their time was limited. He swore then and there that if Harry gave him a one-on-one date, he would own up and tell Harry everything; the man deserved that, and if he was conflicted now, it was best to let him eliminate Niall as a possibility to better focus on his remaining options.

As they trekked over to a large open space of snowy ground, Liam asked quietly, "Did you tell him?"

"About Barbara, yes. Not about Nola. I'll do that next time we're alone."

"How did he react?"

"He was shocked."

"But he seems to like you. I think you have a chance."

"For now, maybe. I'm trying not to get my hopes up."

"True. Because he really likes me a lot."

Niall cracked up. "Why is it you say things like that and I don't hate you for it?"

"Because you love me! Nobody could hate this face, right? That's what Louis said."

"It's not the face, Liam. It's what comes out of it."

"But the face is great too, right?"

"Yes, Liam," Niall soothed. "The face is great."

"Liam!" Harry called back. "Get over here, it's time for me to kick _your_ ass now!"

"But you didn't kick Niall's!"

"Shut up, we're never speaking of that again. Niall, you're on my team! Everybody pair up, we're going to build snowmen and then vote on whose is best."

"What does the winner get?" Jerry asked.

"A kiss from me. For both members of the team."

That was met with approval, until Scott questioned, "What if _you_ win?"

"Then Niall gets a kiss."

"Wait, there are seven of us," Niall reasoned. "How does that work?"

"Oh, good point. Mike, you're with me and Niall."

"Hell yeah," Mike called out, moving closer to Harry.

"How come I can't be with you and Niall?" Liam complained.

"Because I'm kicking your ass, you little shit. Someone needs to take you down. And they say _I_ have a big ego," he teased. When Liam pouted, Harry pulled him in and kissed him on the cheek. "There. Now find a partner and see if you can put your money where your mouth is."

"It's your mouth I'm concerned with. It's gonna be mine when this is over."

"All talk, no action, Liam! Get to work."

Niall watched the two of them banter, finding it adorable but wishing he could be so relaxed with Harry. It came easy to most of these guys, the ability to be themselves and open up. Why was he so afraid to do the same?

_Nola. Because of Nola. I'm looking for a father and I don't think Harry is ready for that and he should just send me home now. This is torture. I'm a horrible father for leaving her._

"Hey."

Harry was suddenly at his side, a gloved hand taking his. He smiled at Harry, who asked, "Everything okay?"

"Yeah. Let's build a snowman."

"That's what I'm talking about. Get over here, gorgeous."

Niall's cheeks heated up, but he was grinning as they joined Mike in their chosen spot.

There was much laughter and ribbing for the next hour as everyone worked, packing snow into large spheres and then scouring the area for random tools to use as accessories. Liam topped his and Peter's with his beanie, Jerry stuck his gloves on twigs shooting out from either side of his and Scott's, and Harry whipped off his scarf to wrap around theirs.

"No fair!" Liam called out. "Yours is fashionable."

"Damn right, it is. Gotta leave my mark on it. Okay, are we all done?"

Everyone stood back, taking in the sight of three haphazard snowmen in the clearing.

"Those are horrible," Mike laughed.

"They really are," Niall giggled. "Who decides the winner?'

"Well, we can't really vote," Harry reasoned. "Since I'm sure every man here wants to win my lips."

No one argued, though Niall's stomach tightened at the idea. What would it be like to kiss Harry?

"I know." Harry yelled at a large group of kids passing by on their way to the cabin. "Hey! You guys want to judge our contest? Come vote and tell us who has the best snowman!"

The few adults in the group herded them over, and Niall realized it was a troop of Girl Scouts. He smiled thinking of Nola, who had already decided she wanted to be a Brownie the following year.

"Stand by the one you like the best," a woman instructed them, and after studying the monstrosities for a while, they moved into place.

"My lucky scarf wins again," Harry murmured, Niall glancing up from next to him.

"Lucky scarf? Really?"

"Yes. I wore that today hoping for one thing I really wanted."

"Did you get it?"

"Not yet, but I'm about to." Moving away, Harry announced the snowman he'd built with Niall and Mike the winner. "Thank you, ladies. Your help is appreciated, and you have great taste."

As they trudged back to the cabin, Mike pulled Harry to the back of the group. Niall could hear them laughing and tried to resist caring, but finally he glanced back over his shoulder in time to witness the kiss and all it did was make him more nervous. Had Harry been serious about kissing both of them?

"Dude," Liam whispered.

"What?"

"Did he kiss you in there?"

"Where?" Niall responded. "In the cabin?"

"Yeah. I heard Jerry say Harry kissed him, and Scott said he got one, too."

"Did you?" Niall asked.

"Of course."

Niall nodded. He'd watched the show enough to know this was how it worked, the Bachelor had to get what he could from each of them to "test it out" but he couldn't help a surge of jealousy along with a feeling of inadequacy.

"So you got kissed, too, right?" Liam pressed.

"Why are you so concerned with kissing?"

"Because! A kiss says a lot. You know when you kiss someone if it's gonna work or not."

"Really? From one kiss? I disagree. Being a great kisser does not guarantee you'll be a great husband."

"Still, you can tell a lot about your compatibility and whether or not there's any spark."

Knowing that Liam was dying to spill, Niall asked, "And was there a spark?'

"It was pretty awesome."

Nodding again, Niall stopped to wait for Liam to enter the cabin before following. He'd figured Liam and Harry would hit it off, and from Louis' reaction the previous night he suspected their kiss (or kisses, rather) had gone well, too. There was definitely more than one, and by the way Louis didn't want to talk about it, Niall also suspected there had been more than a few.

"So how was it for you guys?"

Not really wanting to admit there had been no kiss, Niall shrugged.

"No spark, huh? Dude, I'm sorry. He seems to like you, though. Just promise me if you get sent home, we'll still keep in touch."

"That's a promise I can keep," Niall answered, sliding an arm over Liam's shoulders and squeezing.

"So when do we get the rose?" Liam whispered. It had been sitting on a table before the fireplace earlier and they'd all had to stare at it while they ate and chatted with Harry. Looking over now, they saw it was missing.

"Niall. Can I borrow you?"

Liam blinked in surprise, Niall simply nodding at Harry. Apparently he was going to get that kiss after all, and his mouth went dry as he slipped into the smaller room.

Harry was standing by the huge picture window, staring out. "Come closer, I'm not-"

"Gonna bite," Niall finished, chuckling. "I know." He stepped up next to Harry, resting his hands on the sill and hoping his heartbeat wasn't as loud as it sounded inside his head.

"Unless you want me to," Harry teased. "There is that."

Niall bowed his head as he laughed, grateful to Harry for trying to put him at ease. "Thank you for bringing me along today. I know there were a lot of guys to choose from, and I'm glad you gave me a chance."

"I'm glad I did, too. I enjoyed talking to you earlier and had a lot of fun racing you down the mountain." He slipped his hand into a pocket and pulled out the rose, Niall's eyes following the movement and widening. Harry turned to face Niall, holding it up. "I'd like you to have this."

"Me? But Liam-"

"Liam knows I want him to stay. You seem to need a little convincing, because I don't think you understand or believe that I want you here. So take this, please, and believe me when I say it. I'd like you to stay."

Heart beating faster, Niall nodded and stepped closer to allow Harry to fasten the rose to his shirt.

"Thank you, Niall," Harry said softly. He lowered his hands, letting them slide down Niall's arms and taking Niall's hands briefly in his own before letting go.

The moment grew awkward between them, neither knowing what to say but Niall unsure if he should leave before Harry dismissed him. He forced his brain to work, latching onto something to say. "So we'll see you tomorrow night, right? After your date tomorrow?'

"Yes. There'll be a little cocktail party before the rose ceremony. I'll make sure to check in with you even though you're safe at this point."

"Make sure you check in with Liam, too. Once he finds out I got the rose, he's going to start worrying."

"He's so adorable," Harry commented, then realized it was rude to state that in front of another contestant. "I shouldn't have said that."

"It's fine," Niall grinned. "It's Liam. He is adorable."

Harry laughed, nodding his head. "He really is."

"He's a great guy, too. He'd make you happy."

"There you go trying to set me up with someone else again. First Louis, now Liam? Are you sure you even want to win this thing?"

The question was put to him in a half-joking manner, but Niall didn't know how to respond. He did, but there was so much more to it than simply winning a contest. The future of his child was at stake here, and any move he made could be the wrong one for her. "If it's meant to be, it'll be," Niall finally responded, falling back on the old motto as he gazed up into Harry's eyes.

"I guess we'll just have to see, then, won't we?"

"I guess so."

After a moment Niall looked away, the intensity too much to bear. "Thank you for the rose." He managed a smile for Harry before starting out of the room, only to be stopped when he heard his name.

"Niall. I still owe you a kiss."

Niall's breath caught. He hadn't forgotten, but assumed Harry had. He spun back around, nervous again. The last person to kiss him had been Barbara. "It's been a long time. I'm a little rusty."

"There's been no one since your wife?"

"No."

"Why?"

"I just... haven't found anyone I really wanted to kiss."

"Ah. And uh... has that changed?"

"If you're asking if I'd like to kiss you... the answer is yes."

Harry seemed to relax a bit, offering Niall a small smile. "I won't bite."

"Unless I want you to."

The smile widened, Harry holding out a hand. Niall stepped forward and took it, their fingers intertwining as Harry pulled him closer. "I was starting to think you'd never let me do this."

"We've been alone all of two times, Harry. How far did you expect to get by now?"

"As far as I can?" When Niall rolled his eyes, Harry laughed. "Had to pull out the big guns."

"What, a snowman contest to rope me into it?"

"That was Liam's idea, but it wasn't that. It was the scarf. I always get what I want when I wear this scarf."

"And what you wanted was to kiss me?"

"Among other things." Harry dipped his face down, not giving Niall time to think enough to be nervous, and cupped the back of Niall's head to keep him there as their lips met.

Niall's breath caught, his mouth opening a tiny bit. Harry's tongue teased at his lips until they parted, Niall's hands coming up to rest on Harry's shoulders as he granted access. It might've been because it had been three years, or it might've been because it was a man he was kissing rather than a woman, but Niall found he couldn't get enough. It was as if he was waking from a long sleep, his body remembering what it was like to be touched and teased, screaming at him for making it suffer so long without this. Harry's tongue went deeper, Niall's mouth opening wider, and Harry's fingers tightened in his hair in a way that brought a gasp out of him.

The kiss tapered off slowly, Harry stepping back and letting his hands drop, and Niall realized this was his only chance. He felt it in his gut, knew that Harry wouldn't want to be a father at this stage of his life, and maybe not ever. The next step would be a one-on-one date, where Niall was going to ruin it by telling Harry everything, and never again would he have this gorgeous man in his arms and staring at him with such desire. For once in his life not thinking and simply acting on his needs, Niall tightened his grip on Harry's shoulders and pulled him down again, crashing their lips together until Harry opened his mouth and returned the kiss eagerly (if a bit surprised), backing Niall up against the loveseat. Niall settled onto the back of it, Harry stepping between his legs to get closer while Niall met the advance, gasping when they rubbed against each other.

"Jesus," Harry whispered, doing it again before the kissing recommenced, and Niall's legs came up to wrap around Harry, pulling him even closer. When Harry's hips started moving Niall groaned softly, desperate to keep the friction going while his tongue dove harder into Harry's mouth, and he probably would've let Harry do anything at that point except Harry stepped back suddenly, breaking Niall's grip on both his waist and his shoulders. He stared at Niall with wide eyes as if he'd never seen him before. "Fuck," he breathed, panting slightly.

"Sorry," Niall mumbled, unable to meet his eyes. "I... it's been a long time."

"Yeah. We uh... we need to go."

"Right."

Harry took a moment to adjust himself, running a hand through his hair to regain his composure, and then he walked out of the room without a backward glance.

_Wow. I ruined it before we even got to the part about Nola._ Niall took a deep breath and let it out, forcing himself to calm down before joining the rest of the group in the next room. Harry was laughing with a few of the other guys as if the moment between them had never happened, and when Liam waved Niall over he pretended for a second he didn't see it, needing a little time to process it all.

He ignored Liam's persistent whispers in the limo, only acknowledging it when Liam commented on the rose pinned to his shirt. Niall had almost forgotten that, and reached up to make sure it was really there. He might've ruined his chances by acting like an animal (because Harry certainly hadn't given him even one glance since leaving the room), but at least he was safe for one more week.


	6. Chapter 6

A thought occurred to Niall as he and the guys entered the mansion. He'd been quiet most of the way home, hardly talking to even Liam, and as his eyes roamed the room for Louis he wondered if maybe Louis' reluctance to talk about his own date stemmed from the same place Niall's did-maybe it hadn't gone so well after all.

But Louis was still here, that said something. _He got a rose. Then again, so did I. Before things went bad._

Deciding Louis must be off by himself near or in the pool, Niall headed toward the patio, Liam on his heels.

"Guys!"

Heads swinging to the right, they found Louis in the middle of a card game with a contestant named Ryan that Niall had hardly spoken to. It surprised Niall, who thought he and Liam were the only friends Louis had made in the house.

"Ryan, what's up?"

"Not much, Liam," Ryan smiled. "We were just killing time until you guys all got back. I'd say we're done here, Louis?"

"Definitely. But I won that round."

"Quit dreaming." To Liam, Ryan said, "Where's Mike?"

"I think I saw him headed for the bathroom."

"Got it."

Niall watched Ryan exit the dining room, an unfamiliar feeling creeping up in his belly. "I thought they all hated you, Louis."

"So did I. Ryan found me and apologized for everyone, said it was unfair to be rude just because Harry likes me and that if it wasn't me, it would be someone else. He's right. Surprised me."

"Ryan's cool," Liam agreed. "We were playing C.O.D. for a while yesterday, he's really good."

"Yeah, he kicked my ass at cards, too. I'd say if there's anyone we have to watch out for, it's Ryan. He's the whole package. A nice guy who's super hot."

The feeling grew and Niall frowned. Why was he jealous that Louis found someone else attractive? It didn't bother him that Louis admired Liam. Maybe it was because Ryan was an outsider of their little group?

_All these emotions just need to stop. This is hell._ Niall wasn't used to feeling so much.

"You realize you just described yourself and Niall, right?" Liam smirked. "A nice guy and super hot?"

"Don't sell yourself short, Liam," Louis grinned. "I can't wait for a beach date with you. A brief flash while you're changing at night isn't nearly enough."

Still reeling over the fact that someone had referred to him as "super hot," Niall almost missed a sight he didn't think he'd ever see-Liam blushing. He laughed, and that made Liam blush harder. "If you could see your face right now... "

"Shut up." Liam punched Niall's arm, Niall rubbing it as he continued to giggle. "Get me a beer."

"Grab me one, too?" Louis begged. "Please?"

"At least _you_ say 'please.'" He picked up three from the kitchen, then returned to join Louis and Liam, who had taken a seat at the table. After passing them each a bottle, Niall took the chair across from Liam with Louis between them at the head of the table.

"Okay, so talk. How'd it go?"

Niall sobered. Liam answered, "Great for me. But Niall still got the rose."

"I see that."

Niall reached up to remove it, setting it on the table in front of him. "And then things went downhill."

"What happened, dude? He won't talk about it," Liam said to Louis.

"He doesn't have to. It's between each of us and Harry, and if Niall's not comfortable talking about it, don't push him."

"Thank you, Louis. I'm just... embarrassed." Niall spun the bottle between his fingers, eyes on the table.

Liam sighed. "But why? What happened? You did get that kiss, right?"

Niall nodded, explaining to Louis about the snowman contest and that he and Mike had won.

"It went badly?" Louis pressed, but in a gentle manner.

"It was pretty good until I attacked him. I don't know what happened, I guess it's been too long. I just... lost it."

Liam'ss jaw dropped. "Wait, it wasn't that there was no spark? You turned into an animal?"

"Uh... basically. Yeah." Cheeks flaming, Niall gulped down half his beer.

"Damn," Liam remarked in admiration. "I didn't know you had it in you."

When Louis remained quiet, Niall asked, "So what do you think? Did I ruin it?"

Louis shrugged. "Hard to know. How did he react?"

Niall remembered the feel of Harry's hands insistent on his hips, the way Harry had backed him up to the couch and pulled him closer. "I... it's... I don't know. He pushed me away."

"Wow, dude. That sounds bad," Liam sympathized.

"What about before that?" Louis' voice was quiet.

"Before what? The kiss?"

"Before he pushed you away, Niall. He didn't push you away immediately, did he?"

Niall's eyes narrowed. Louis sounded as if he was speaking from experience. "No. He didn't."

"Then I don't think you ruined anything."

"Oh, that's why he couldn't even look at me after? He just took off without a word, acted like it had never happened and I didn't exist."

Liam reached across to squeeze Niall's arm. "He's right, Louis. Harry didn't even hug him goodbye, and we all got hugs. He maybe gave Niall a quick smile but like... that's it."

"Oh. Wow."

Niall sighed, sitting back in the chair. "I don't know why I'm letting it bother me. Once he finds out about Nola I'm gone anyway." When Louis raised an eyebrow, Niall nodded. "Liam knows everything now. He agrees that I probably don't have a chance."

"You don't know that," Louis argued. "I think Harry is deeper than any of us realize. Though he did admit to being a slut," he chuckled.

"Yeah, he told me that, too. But he told me not to assume I know what he wants."

"Right," Louis agreed. "I got that much, he hates it when people make assumptions about him. Word to the wise, Liam."

"Thanks. I'm pretty sure I'll be getting a one-on-one next week. That's if I get a rose tomorrow night. What if I don't?"

"You're getting a rose," Niall assured him.

"You can't know that, dude."

"Trust me, Liam. You're getting a rose."

Giving Niall a suspicious glance, Liam said, "You know something. What did he say?"

"Just that he wants you to stay."

"You guys talked about me?"

"A little. I don't think we're really supposed to, but he thinks I'm trying to set him up with both of you."

"Are you?" Louis asked.

"Not really, I do want to win. But I'm not going to, so why not help you two where I can?"

"See?" Liam jumped in. "Nice guy and super hot. Harry would be an idiot to pass you up."

"Thanks." Niall smiled, squeezing Liam's arm in return. "Same with you two. It's gotta be a tough decision. But in my case it's about more than whether or not he's compatible with me. What matters is his willingness and ability to be a father to Nola. That's a huge step."

Louis nodded, but added, "Doesn't mean you can't enjoy him as well. You need a man who satisfies both of you-Nola as a father, you as a husband."

"I didn't realize how lonely I was until he kissed me. You just... don't think about it. And then when it happens, you remember how amazing it can be."

"And you don't even know how awesome it really _can_ be," Liam smirked. "I've been with women. There's no comparison, Niall. It's so much hotter with a guy."

"I have to agree. Women are okay, but there's nothing like being pounded so hard you can't even breathe. And then when-" Louis paused, swallowing. "Okay, no more talking about sex. I miss it way too much." He downed some of his beer in an attempt to cool off.

Uncharacteristically quiet, Liam stared at Louis.

"What?" Louis asked.

"I wouldn't have pegged you as a bottom."

Louis shrugged. "I like both."

"That's really hot."

Niall made a sound of agreement; all this talk was heating him up as well. "Let's get some sleep. It's been a long day."

"But I didn't get to tell Louis about my time with Harry!"

"Go ahead, Liam. I'm going to bed, guys. Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Niall." Louis stood up to hug Niall as he rose. "Did you get a chance to call Nola tonight?"

"No, it's too late now. I told her I might not be able to, figured I'd get back late if I I got the group date. I'll call her tomorrow night."

"Night, Niall." Liam walked around the table to hug Niall as well. "Oh hey, don't forget your rose."

Reaching back for it, Niall smiled. "Thanks, Liam. You'll get one tomorrow, I promise."

"I'd better. The way he kissed me, I deserve it."

Niall changed into his sleep clothes, leaving the rose on his pillow as he moved around the bedroom. It kept catching his eye as if mocking him, reminding him that whatever Harry had seen in him briefly was now gone. He was tempted to trash it but then remembered he'd need to be wearing it during the ceremony the following night.

Instead he moved it to his nightstand before sliding under the covers, leaving the light on for the other two. Turning over onto his side, Niall stared at it for a long while and appreciated what it symbolized.

For the first time in his life, a stunningly gorgeous man had found him interesting. Niall had always been the nerdy, brainy kid, and he'd grown into an even brainier adult with a sharp wit that made him friends easily when he tried, but he'd never been known as the kind of man to attract men (or women, for that matter) at the Harry Styles level.

Barbara had told him repeatedly he was sexy. Not once had he truly believed it or felt that way himself. When Harry had looked at him with such open desire, though, he hadn't doubted what he was seeing-Harry had wanted him. Maybe it was the shy, quiet side of him that Harry was attracted to and he'd crushed that image by becoming aggressive. Niall imagined most, if not all, of the other men threw themselves at him (except perhaps for Louis) and Niall had probably felt like a breath of fresh air to Harry. He'd stifled that dream, though, by attacking Harry so thoroughly that Harry was overwhelmed.

Niall sighed now, knowing it was for the best and that everything happened for a reason, but being desired by Harry had been an incredible feeling that he would hold onto for the rest of his life, remember it when he was alone in his room at night lonely and aching to be touched.

For a few brief minutes, Harry Styles had wanted to own him. He'd been turned on, Niall had felt that much, and when he closed his eyes he was back in that moment-Harry's hands dragging his hips closer, Harry's mouth invading his and begging for things Niall had only dreamed of. He shuddered slightly, frustrated by what he wanted but couldn't have, and knowing the memories would have to be enough.

Louis and Liam came to bed an hour later, Liam smiling when he caught sight of Niall's fingers wrapped around the rose resting on his pillow. He only hoped that after tomorrow's rose ceremony, he'd have a new one to sleep with as well.

* * *

The following day was tough on all three of them. Ryan had been chosen for the second one-on-one date, and they all knew he was a definite threat. Spending the day sunning and playing games of all types, the three stuck together and distracted one another from thinking too much about what might be happening on the date.

They dressed carefully for the cocktail party. Even though Louis and Niall already had roses, it wouldn't hurt to improve their chances for another week. Still they spent more time on Liam, making sure he looked his best because neither of them wanted him to leave.

No one was surprised when Ryan returned with a rose.

The party began when Harry entered the room, greeted by smiles on all sides, and Louis noted how the room lit up with his presence. He had that something special, not because he was the prize but because he somehow glowed. It was no wonder he'd been so successful as a model; Louis would bet he turned heads everywhere he went. He hated that he was affected as well, knowing it would be easier if he simply didn't care.

Harry smiled before addressing them. "Okay, guys, I wanted to thank everyone I've had dates with this week. I had fun with each and every one of you, and those who didn't get one, hang tight. You'll get your moment. Tonight I want to touch base with those of you I haven't spent much time with. Jeff, will you join me?"

Jeff took his arm with a grin and they moved out to the patio.

Liam leaned over to whisper to Niall. "Did he look at you this time?"

"Briefly. His eyes passed over me as he was talking."

"Okay, cool. I got the same thing. He's good at hiding his feelings, I think."

Having heard that, Louis smirked. Harry certainly hadn't hid any feelings on _their_ date. Feeling guilty for taking pride in that, Louis laid an arm over each of their shoulders. "Come on, let's go relax somewhere. We probably won't be needed until the ceremony."

They stayed close enough to be available if by some miracle Harry wanted to talk to them, finding a corner table to gather around while waiting it out. Thirty minutes in Harry found them.

"There you guys are! Trying to hide from me?"

"Of course not! Hi!" Liam stood up and practically tackled Harry with a hug, Harry laughing as he stumbled back, and Louis realized that Harry seemed to light up around them as well; if nothing else, he enjoyed their company.

"Hey. You guys doing okay? Nobody's making your stay hell?" When Liam didn't move away, sliding an arm around Harry's waist and turning back to face Niall and Louis, Harry returned the gesture.

"It could be worse," Louis answered. "I was pretty hated in the beginning, but now that you're spending time with the others it's better."

"Good. And Niall. How are you?"

"Uh, good. Everything's good." Niall could hardly meet Harry's gaze.

"I'm glad. Um... Louis. Could I have a minute with you?"

"Yeah, sure." Surprised, Louis rose from his chair and took the outstretched hand Harry offered.

"Do you think he'll do that with all of us, or is it just Louis?" Liam asked when they were gone.

"I don't know. Probably just Louis. I think Louis' still the favorite."

"Yeah, I do, too. It's hard to be mad, cause Louis' so awesome, you know?" Liam took his seat again, reaching for his drink.

Niall nodded. "I'd be happy if he picked either of you. Did Louis ever tell you more about his date?"

"Nah, I thought he might last night after you went to bed, but mostly we just talked about Harry and how he acted up at the snow. I think Louis likes him more than he wants to."

"I think so, too," Niall agreed.

Harry didn't release Louis' hand once they were settled in the loveseat, and Louis' grip tightened on his. Now that they were alone the feelings were intense again, and he tried to stop thinking about how badly he was dying to be kissed. "So how are you?" he asked Harry. "Hanging in there okay?"

"Yeah, it's tough. I know it isn't easy on you guys either, but I feel pulled in so many directions."

"I can imagine. It's hard deciding who to send home, isn't it?"

"Not so much now. And I'm just being honest here. Either you have a connection or you don't, and with some of these guys I really don't. It'll get harder as time goes on, though."

"Yeah."

"You're easy to talk to, you know that?"

Louis chuckled. "I've heard that before. Niall spilled his life story the day we met, and he says he never does that."

"Really? Niall did?"

Nodding, Louis said carefully, "There's more to Niall than meets the eye."

"I sense that. I asked you to come out here because I'm going crazy. Can I please kiss you?"

The subject change threw him almost as much as the words themselves, which mirrored Louis' own thoughts. Relieved that Harry was still feeling it, Louis said softly, "You don't have to ask anymore, Harry. If you want me, I'm yours."

"Of course I want you," Harry whispered. "Do you think that's changed?" He dragged Louis close, their lips meeting as if starved for years, and any uncertainty Louis had been feeling melted away; Harry definitely still wanted him.

When angry voices erupted from the next room, the always-curious Liam jumped up to investigate. He poked his head back in a few seconds later. "Niall. You gotta see this."

Frowning, Niall followed Liam into the main room, where he saw disgusted faces turning away from the windows facing the patio. "Are you guys spying? That's horrible!"

"Just look." Liam pushed him toward a window, and Niall's heart dropped into his stomach. Harry was straddling Louis' lap, the two of them kissing in a way that was almost indecent. "Wow. Guess the date went well after all."

"No kidding," Liam remarked. "My kiss wasn't anything like that."

"Well, wait until you have a whole date with him. Don't forget, Louis spent an entire day alone with Harry. It's natural for them to be closer."

Liam raised an eyebrow and asked, "You really think that explains a kiss like that? Damn. Louis' got this. I guess when the spark's there... I'm not giving up, though. I'll just have to show him I can be sexy, too."

Peter suddenly exploded. "Okay, can they just stop already? How long are they gonna make out?"

Niall turned away, the sight hurting him more than he would've imagined. The sooner Harry sent him home, the better.

* * *

Standing off to the side with Niall and Ryan, Louis held his breath as he watched Harry enter the room. There was a tension in Niall that made no sense considering he was guaranteed another week. Louis knew Niall was having doubts and missing Nola, and he feared Niall might be planning to leave. Now would be the time to do it, before Harry started handing out the week's roses, so that someone else could remain and be given another chance.

Harry gave a little speech again, thanking everyone and reiterating that he looked forward to the coming weeks. When he fell silent Niall moved as if to step forward. Louis immediately grabbed his wrist, having been ready, and Niall halted.

"Don't," Louis whispered. He tightened his grip in case Niall was thinking about doing it anyway, and felt Niall relax as he sighed in what sounded like frustration.

Harry began the ceremony, calling out names and asking each to accept a rose. Louis started to wonder if Niall had somehow been wrong about Liam, because there were suddenly only two roses left and Liam had still not been named.

Glancing over at the group on the steps, Louis could see that Liam was sweating it now, trying so hard to keep up a brave face and it made Louis wish he wasn't so far away. It had been easier when he'd had both his buddies close enough to comfort.

The next rose was given to Jeff, and then even Niall was looking worried. Louis saw him exchange a glance with Liam, both of them scared, before Harry lifted the final rose.

There was a long moment of silence, and then Harry announced, "Liam."

Relieved sighs escaped all three of them. Liam stomped up to Harry and glared at him. "You did that on purpose."

Harry only smirked before asking, "Liam, will you accept this rose?"

"I should say no just to see your face," Liam hissed, then broke into a bright smile. "But of course I will!" Once Harry had fastened the rose, giggling as he did so, Liam snuck in a kiss on the cheek.

Louis rolled his eyes watching them. _They're like children together. I'm surprised there wasn't a snowball fight yesterday._

When the three who were dismissed had said their goodbyes, Harry turned to the ones who were left.

"Okay boys, get to bed early tonight. We have to be up at five for a flight to Arizona."

"Arizona? What the hell's in Arizona?" Scott asked.

"A good time, if you're lucky," Harry winked.

This was met with laughter, the mood buoyant among those remaining to compete for another week.

Staring at the faces surrounding him and remembering the feel of Harry straddling him earlier, Louis couldn't help the words that ran through his mind.

_Six down, nineteen to go._

XXX

As none of them wanted to get up earlier than they had to the next morning, they showered before bed. Niall was almost asleep when Louis returned from the bathroom and Liam disappeared into it, still hyper from his rose.

"Maybe now I can sleep," Niall chuckled when the door closed. "He keeps talking about how he's gonna get Harry back for scaring him earlier."

Louis shook his head as he tossed his dirty clothes into a hamper. "Those two, I swear." He slid into his own bed, sighing as he relaxed.

"Do you think Harry really did do it on purpose? Leave him for last just to make him sweat?"

"I do. With anyone else it would seem cruel, but it makes sense for them. They're like big kids, have you noticed?"

Niall nodded. "You should've seen them in competition over a snowman. They were determined to take each other down."

"Or Harry was determined to kiss you."

Not expecting that reply, Niall blinked. He'd wondered that himself after Harry's comment about the lucky scarf, but wasn't going to put any stock in it. The point was moot anyway-Harry had made it clear tonight that whatever he'd been feeling had passed.

Coming from Louis, though, the idea seemed even more ridiculous. It was obvious that whatever Harry might've wanted from Niall, it was nothing compared to his desire for Louis.

Niall's eyes had fallen closed again when Louis spoke. "Did you get to talk to Nola?"

"Yeah, for a few minutes. Mom let her stay up late since we didn't talk last night."

"Is she doing okay?"

"She's good. Finally over the cold she had when I left, so that makes me feel a little better at least. I guess Mom told her I might be going to other countries so she asked me to bring her back a baby kangaroo from Australia."

Laughing, Louis said, "I need to meet this kid. She sounds precious."

"Never boring, that's for sure." Niall smiled, imagining her asleep right now-or begging Grandma for one more story before bed.

"I know how badly you must miss her, Niall."

"Thanks, but you can't really know. You've never been a parent." Niall hadn't meant for it to sound so bitter, but Louis' silence was proof it had come out worse than he'd intended. "Why did you stop me, Louis?" he finally asked.

"Because I think you're giving up too soon."

"How is going home to my daughter giving up?"

"You came here to find a father for her. This place is the best chance you have right now, because once you go home I know you're not gonna date."

"You don't know anything about me."

"Then tell me, Niall. If I'm wrong, tell me."

After a pause, Niall sighed. "You're not wrong."

"Exactly. So don't be so quick to give up. If you feel nothing for Harry, that's different. And has it occurred to you that it doesn't have to be Harry? There's a whole houseful of guys here. As much as I hate to encourage it, you should get to know the rest."

Niall frowned, rolling over onto his side. "Why would you hate that?"

"Honestly? I like having you and Liam to myself. It's selfish, but you two are special to me and I don't like sharing."

"Wow. Really?" Watching Louis blush, Niall grinned. "I hated that you spent yesterday with Ryan. Made me totally jealous."

"What?" Louis laughed, eyes widening. "Seriously?"

"Seriously. Because he's not... you know. One of us."

"One of us. I like that."

"Liam is pretty friendly with the other guys, though. It doesn't bother me as much, probably because it's just his way. He loves people."

"True. Is there anyone else you'd want to consider? I know we're not allowed to fool around amongst ourselves, but you can talk to them for now and see what happens when it's over."

"I'm definitely in this for Harry. Which is weird, because he's not my type and we have nothing in common, but there's something about him. He makes me feel things I haven't in a long time. Maybe not ever."

"Then why would you want to leave, Niall?"

With a heavy sigh, Niall rolled over onto his back. "Because there's no chance. And knowing that, there's no reason for me to stay when I have a daughter who needs me at home."

"Niall, you don't know that! Anything can happen!"

"Bullshit, Louis! You saw how he acted with me earlier. Barely even looked at me, okay? He was hanging on Liam and practically fucked you by the pool. Don't tell me he's feeling something for me when he obviously isn't."

Niall's outburst shocked them both. Louis sat up in bed, blue eyes apologetic. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have let that happen like that, with everyone nearby, but I wanted it, I've been dying to kiss him again for two days and I just... I'm sorry."

"You don't need to be sorry," Niall replied, feeling bad now because he knew Louis felt guilty. "We all would've done the same thing. It was just hard to see, for all of us. We shouldn't have been spying on you anyway."

"I didn't expect to feel these things so fast. Or at the level I do. He makes me... fuck, I don't even know. It's all jumbled and I thought I had it under control but then he kissed me again and I lost it. I can't resist him and I don't know why," Louis complained. "It pisses me off."

"You can't fight your feelings, Louis. You came here to fall in love. Let it happen."

Raising an eyebrow, Louis said, "So did you. Take your own advice."

"You know... " After trailing off Niall shook his head, deciding not to continue.

"What?"

"Nothing."

"Niall, will you just talk to me? We need to stick together here, and if we can't talk to each other then who can we talk to?"

Knowing Louis was right, Niall said, "Look, the truth is I think I might have had a chance. Or at least as much chance as anybody else here... if it wasn't for you."

Louis waited, silently urging Niall to continue.

"I don't blame you, and I don't like you any less for it, but with you here there's not an even playing field. None of us can compare in his eyes. And before you start arguing, remember that I'm one of the good guys. I'm your friend. This isn't something I would say if it wasn't true."

"I know," Louis responded softly. "You're right, and I feel horrible about that."

"It's not your fault. Don't you dare leave just to improve our chances, either. I get the feeling you would do that for your friends, and neither Liam or I want that."

Louis looked down and Niall knew he was right.

"Obviously you two have something special. You'd be an idiot to willingly give that up, Louis."

Sucking in a breath, Louis nodded and then let it out. "Okay. I'll stay, but only if you promise to stay, too. We do this together, stick it out to the end."

"Or until one of us gets sent home."

"Fine. But if you leave, I leave, too. That's the deal. Got it?"

Niall really didn't want to agree to that, because he didn't know how much more he could take of watching Harry devour other men the way he had Louis, or how long he could stand to be away from Nola. And what if by some miracle he did make it to the final four, where he would take Harry home to meet her; was he really ready to introduce a man like Harry to his angel?

" _But one thing my best friend urged me to do was to keep an open mind, to not rule out any possibilities before giving them a chance."_

Harry's voice rang in his head, taking Niall back to that room in the snow where they'd shared something powerful.

_He wanted me. I know he did. I don't know what changed, but he wanted me. Maybe I can get that back._

"Niall? Do we have a deal?"

Meeting Louis' eyes across the room, Niall nodded firmly as Liam entered the room. "Deal."

"Deal? What deal?" Liam closed the door and threw his pile of clothes at Louis, catching him square in the face.

"Dude! What the fuck?" Louis shot the clothing back at Liam, missing when Liam ducked.

"Missed me. What deals are we making?"

Niall replied smoothly, "I get the bathroom first in the morning." He wasn't sure why he was lying, only knew that he didn't want Liam to know of their discussion.

"How is that fair? I wasn't here to be part of the deal."

"Shouldn't have taken so long in the shower," Louis smirked. "Turn off the light?"

"You both suck."

"Mmm," Louis hummed. "I do it well, too."

Liam's hand froze on the switch, his tongue coming out to lick at his lips as he stared at Louis. "Don't joke about that. Do you know how horny I've been for the past week?"

The words and tone had affected Niall as well. He met Louis' eyes, then Liam's, before they all looked away from each other. "Turn out the light, Liam. We all need to sleep."

Other than the sounds of them all settling into bed, the room was quiet for ten minutes before Liam asked, "Don't we get to sleep with him at some point? When does that happen?"

"When it gets down to three of us," Niall answered. "About four weeks, maybe?"

"Damn. Can't come soon enough. Literally."

Louis and Niall busted up, Louis throwing a pillow toward Liam's bed. "Shut up and go to sleep, horndog."

"You started it with your talk about blowjobs."

"I know. I'm sorry."

They quieted down again, but a few minutes later Louis said, "I bet he gives fantastic blowjobs."

"Louis!" Niall scolded.

"What? Have you seen those lips? You know I'm right. And that tongue. Damn."

A whine erupted from Liam, prompting Niall to put an end to the talk. "Enough. We're all horny and we can't touch each other so don't make this worse. Just go to sleep."

Two loud, frustrated sighs answered him, but otherwise there was no more talk. Closing his eyes, Niall willed his body to calm down.

At this rate, they'd all go crazy before it was over.


	7. Chapter 7

The Grand Canyon turned out to be "what the hell's in Arizona." Everyone was set up in a hotel near the South Rim, the sleeping arrangements remaining the same for Louis, Liam, and Niall.

Niall had been concerned about that and knew that as more contestants were eliminated it would probably change, but for the time being he was grateful to keep Liam and Louis near, if in different rooms of the suite they shared.

It was a one-on-one date card that arrived first, Ryan reading it this time as they crowded into a huge suite set up as the gathering place. "'Cast about with me to find shelter from the storm.'" He hesitated, all eyes expectant on him, then announced, "Liam."

Liam's mouth dropped before he screamed, "Yes! Yes yes yes!"

"Don't hurt yourself, Liam," Louis teased as he watched Liam jump around and fist-pump the air.

"You're right! He might have plans for this body later. Woo! Wonder what he meant by shelter, though."

"Hopefully he meant that literally," Niall remarked, "because there's supposed to be a huge storm later today. I hope your date isn't outdoors."

"If it is, that just means we have to huddle together for warmth," Liam said to Niall with a wink. "What the hell do I wear?"

"Come on," Louis chuckled. "Let's go get you ready."

Stuffing a backpack just in case it did rain, Liam was ready soon. They'd settled on a t-shirt and shorts, since the temperature was supposed to be warm (if wet), and then went to wait downstairs.

"Think he'll pick me up or will they take me to wherever he is?"

"Considering you're waiting here, I'd guess you're heading out together," Niall reasoned. "He'd be leaving from the hotel, too."

"I'm nervous."

"It'll be fine." Louis hugged him close with one arm. "You two have a good relationship already."

"I know, but this is my first time really alone with him. This is when it could all go wrong. Look what happened with Niall."

"Dude, really?"

"Sorry, Niall. You get what I mean, though, right? If it doesn't go well, I'm leaving tonight."

They all glanced over at Liam's luggage, which was ready and waiting by the door in case he didn't return.

"You're not going anywhere." Hugging Liam again, Louis said, "Just be yourself. It's impossible to resist you."

"Yeah? Thanks, Louis." Liam planted a quick kiss on Louis' cheek, Niall shaking his head at them as Louis grinned.

The front door opened and Harry was there, gorgeous even in a baseball cap and jeans. He waved at the men spread around the room, smiling when his gaze found the three of them seated together on a couch. "Hey Louis, hands off! This one's mine for the day."

Liam jumped up, beaming, and hugged Harry. "All yours, sexy. Where are we going?"

"A few places, but first we're shopping."

"Shopping? Hell yeah. Bye, guys!"

Harry grabbed Liam's hand as he passed, keeping him from rushing out. "Niall, can I talk to you for a minute?"

"Of course." Niall stood up immediately.

"Promise I won't be long," Harry whispered to Liam, who nodded, and then Harry led Niall to the small kitchen.

"Uh oh," Liam grimaced. "Can he send Niall home on the spot like that?"

"No, it has to be during a ceremony. Niall's not going anywhere."

Louis' stomach turned over, though-Harry pulling Niall aside couldn't be good, because if it was to fix things, that meant Niall was tougher competition again; if it wasn't, that meant Niall might be going home soon. What if Harry had found out about Nola?

Harry leaned back against the kitchen counter, hands behind him as he restlessly pushed himself forward a few times. When he had Niall's attention, he began, "I wanted to apologize for what happened at the cabin."

Hands in his pockets as usual, Niall replied, "I'm the one who should be apologizing. I lost control. I'm sorry."

"You just surprised me."

"I know. It won't happen again."

"Niall... " Harry sighed, not knowing how to get across what he wanted to say. "It was fine, I just wasn't expecting it. I didn't mean to make you feel like you'd done anything wrong."

"Well, my moves weren't very classy, that's for sure."

Harry chuckled, shoving himself away from the counter completely to approach Niall, who stepped back some. Harry noted it and halted, sliding his own hands into his pockets. "I still feel like you're going to bail on me. I'm terrified I'm going to lose you before I even get a chance to know you."

Thinking back to his conversation with Louis last night, Niall shook his head. "I'm not going anywhere until you make me."

"Promise?"

Niall finally met his eyes, looking up to see that Harry really was afraid; it helped a lot, knowing they were both unsure about things. "Unless my feelings toward you change, yes. I promise."

A slow smile spread across Harry's face. "So. There are... _feelings_ toward me?"

Blushing as his gaze dropped, Niall grinned. "Maybe."

"That's a good start." This time when Harry stepped forward, almost hesitantly, Niall didn't back away. "May I... can I just test something?"

Niall nodded, his heart crashing again when he realized Harry was going to kiss him. He freed his hands to allow Harry's to slide around his waist, letting Harry pull him closer and lifting his face to meet Harry's soft lips.

Their second kiss was slower but no less passionate. Niall kept thinking they needed to stop, Liam was waiting and it wasn't fair of him to use up Liam's time on himself, but when Harry's mouth was claiming his it was difficult to be fair. He ran his hands up Harry's arms, the t-shirt feeling soft under them before his fingers reached Harry's hair and curled around the silky strands. Harry's grip tightened on his hips then, fingers digging into them, and for some reason that flipped a switch in Niall, once again waking up feelings he usually managed to keep buried. He tightened his hold on Harry's hair, Harry gasping into Niall's mouth before the tongue became demanding, and the next thing Niall knew he was up against the wall, his legs coming up to wrap around Harry again while Harry's mouth forced his open wider, and then it was like before—neither could seem to get enough.

It wasn't until Harry ripped himself away that Niall realized he'd done it again. He banged his head back against the wall, angry as his feet dropped to the ground and Harry put distance between them. "I'm sorry. I don't know why that keeps happening."

"Because you're fucking hot, that's why. Will you quit apologizing for it? Fuck!" Harry's hand went up to run through his hair but met fabric, and he ran it over his face instead.

Both trying to calm their breathing, they stared at each other but that wasn't helping—all it did was make Niall want more. He had to look away, licking his lips and closing his eyes, and suddenly it all made sense. He couldn't bear to look at Harry right now because he didn't think he could control himself. The other day Harry hadn't even seemed to acknowledge him after their kiss, but maybe he'd been feeling what Niall was now—and it wouldn't have mattered where Harry was in the room, or whom he was with, Niall would've felt his presence and been going insane to get to him. How had Harry survived that limo ride back from the snow?

"You need to go," he said now, and had to laugh slightly. It was almost exactly what Harry had said after their first kiss.

"No kidding. I don't know what it is about you, but you'd better not leave before I figure it out. Got that?"

A finger pointed at him, and Niall smiled. "Deal. Now go make Liam feel on top of the world again so he can keep me up all night telling me how awesome you are and how badly you want him."

Harry laughed hard, opening the swinging door and gently pushing Niall through it. "I'll try. Liam, you ready to go?"

"I've only been ready for an hour, dude. So far you suck as a date."

"I've been told that's a good thing." He winked at Liam, whose eyes widened before he blushed. "Managed to make you blush! Wonder how many of those I can get out of you before the sun sets." He held out a hand for Liam.

Taking it, Liam linked their fingers and picked up his backpack. "Quit bragging. I can make you blush, too."

"Doubt it. Nothing makes me blush, I've seen too much." Harry waved to everyone else with his free hand, letting Liam get the door. "See you guys later."

"Bye!" was chorused around the room, Louis calling out, "See if you can smack some of that arrogance out of him, Harry. He'll be hell to live with tonight otherwise."

Liam smiled hugely. "Don't worry, Louis, I'll tell you _all_ about my date. I'm sure there will be plenty of stories about how I made him blush and how he can't resist me."

Louis picked up a pillow from the couch and chucked it across the room, Liam laughing as he ducked it. "Missed me!"

"One of these days I'll get you, Liam! When you least expect it I'll be there."

"Oh, I'm so scared, Louis. Come on, Harry." Liam dragged Harry out of the room, the closing of the door being followed by silence. It was always hard when Harry left, at least for the first few seconds, as they stared at each other and remembered they were all in competition.

This time Peter broke the silence. "Why is it I don't hate that guy?"

"Liam?" Scott asked.

"Yeah. If any of you said shit like that, I'd want to punch you."

"It's because he's Liam," Louis smiled. "There's just something about him, makes it impossible to hate him."

"Come on, let's go for a walk," Niall suggested. "It's too crowded in here."

Louis didn't argue, following Niall out of the suite. "Anywhere you want to go? We're not allowed to go far."

"No, just around the hotel is fine. I needed to get out of there for a few minutes."

Louis pressed the button for the elevator, glancing at Niall curiously. "So... how'd it go?"

"With Harry?"

"Yeah. Are you two okay now?"

The doors slid open and Niall stepped into the elevator, hands back in his pockets as he spun around to lean against the wall while Louis chose the lobby level. "We're okay. He apologized for the way he acted after our kiss, and I apologized for attacking him. He um... asked me not to leave."

Louis gave him an "I told you so" look. "See? You didn't ruin anything."

"No, I guess not. I'm not used to all these feelings, Louis. For so long I didn't allow myself to feel anything other than like a father. Now I'm... wanting things. If nothing else, this experience made me realize that I won't be satisfied alone for the rest of my life. Nola is my priority, and there's nothing more important in my life than her, but I need someone."

"Preferably a man?"

"Most definitely. I've learned that much, too."

"Good." Louis nodded, the doors opening for them to walk out into the lobby. "It's good to know that, where you stand and what you need in your life." After they exited, Louis asked, "Where do you think they're going on their date?"

"Fishing."

"Fishing?"

"I'm assuming that's what 'cast about' meant. There are a lot of lakes around here."

"Oh. Makes sense. I can't imagine Harry fishing, though."

Niall chuckled. "Yeah, that'll be a sight. Moments like this are why I can't wait to see the show air months from now. I wonder what else we're missing."

"I can't wait to see you guys in the snow. I bet Liam was adorable trying to beat Harry."

"Yeah, they're pretty cute together. It's... hard sometimes, you know? To watch that."

"Tell me about it. Even the brief moments upstairs when they were leaving was kind of torture."

"Strangely, that didn't bother me."

"No?"

"No. I wonder why."

Shrugging, Louis said, "It bothered me. A lot."

"Did it bother you that Harry took me aside in the kitchen?"

"No, because you two had some things to clear up. It surprised me, but it didn't bother me."

"But it bothers you when Liam and Harry spend thirty seconds trying to outdo each other."

"I never said it made sense, Niall," Louis snapped, suddenly irritated.

"Because honestly?" Niall pressed. "If there's anything that should bother you, it's me and Harry in the kitchen. We did more than talk."

Louis stopped walking, feeling like he'd been punched. "Why would you tell me that?"

"I... don't really know." Niall stopped as well, letting out a breath. "I'm sorry. It wasn't to make you feel bad or hurt you. I'm just saying that at this point, Liam isn't the one you need to worry about. That could all change today, of course. Look how much one date changed your opinion about Harry. And I have no idea what he's feeling for any of the other guys, because they don't talk to me. But as far as the three of us... Liam said the way Harry kissed you is nothing like the way he kissed him. He was scared when he watched you two making out, because apparently they're not at that level."

"And... you are."

"We... yeah. I'm not sure how or why, but yeah. We agreed that we're all going to remain friends when this is over, and I don't want that to change. I think it's important for us all to be open with each other, because if we aren't, there will be a lot of resentment and hurt. Which is typical in a situation like this, feelings are strong and tempers fly and no matter what happens with Harry, I don't want to lose you two. And if one of us _does_ win, the other two have to be okay with seeing Harry and the winner together. Otherwise the friendship doesn't stand a chance. Watching Harry kiss you the way he'd kissed me was really hard. You think you have this amazing chemistry with someone that no one else does and then you see that you're not the only one and it's... it crushes you. But we have to be prepared for that, you know?"

"I keep feeling like I'm going to lose it. The top spot. Every time he goes on a date with someone, I feel like he wants me less. I know that's natural, but I hate it."

"Yeah. It's only going to get tougher, Louis. Liam is going to come home tonight bursting to tell us everything. And we're going to listen, because we're his friends, and when he tells us about how they made out for hours we're going to deal with it and pray it's us next time."

"I really don't want to hear about it, Niall."

"I know. But we will."

Louis nodded, taking a deep breath before wrapping an arm around Niall's shoulders and steering him back toward the room. "Feel like some fifa?"

"That sounds wonderful." Niall slid an arm around Louis' waist, taking comfort in the fact that he wasn't alone.

* * *

Harry held the car door open for Liam. "Where's our driver?" Liam asked.

"You're looking at him. They let us have a car for the day." He closed Liam in with a smile, continuing the conversation once he was in his own seat and belting in. "There are of course cameras in here, though, so no fucking in the backseat."

"Damn."

They giggled, Harry turning the car on and heading out of the driveway. Before they turned onto the main road, Liam said, "Can I at least have a kiss before we get going?"

Harry grinned, leaning over to press his lips to Liam's. They kissed until a car behind them honked, then broke into giggles again. "Oops."

"They can wait." But Liam sat back in his seat, letting Harry drive. "So where are we going?"

"I told you. Shopping."

"And then?"

Harry hesitated, but finally answered, "I guess there's no reason to keep it a secret. We're going fishing. And I sure as hell hope you know how to fish, because I haven't been since I was a kid."

"Really? Fishing? I love fishing! I'm a pro, don't worry. This time I get to teach you!"

"Awesome! And how are you at reading maps?"

"Uh... yeah, not so good at that."

"Neither am I. So we may get lost on our way to the lake, but at least we'll have fun doing it!"

Talk was light as they drove, Harry wanting to hear more about Liam's dogs. They laughed over memories Liam shared, and Harry talked a bit about the one dog he'd owned as a child and how much he still missed her. Liam held his hand when Harry related the tale of her death when he was nine, choking up even after so many years.

Liam had been expecting a mall or at least a huge shopping center, but Harry eventually turned into a grocery store parking lot. "We're buying food?"

"We have to eat something, right? The plan is to eat what we catch, but I'm not a complete idiot; I know I'm going to suck at fishing. This way we won't starve. And," Harry added with a twinkle in his eye as they parked, "I also get to try to your famous hot dogs."

Liam's face lit up. "Seriously? You want me to cook for you?"

"It might be our only chance. Can you find everything you need here?"

"Yes! Just normal hot dogs, though I do have a brand I prefer, and I fix 'em up with my own secret ingredients. Wait, is there a camera crew in there?"

"I think so, yeah. I know there's at least one guy who's gonna follow us around all day."

"Damn. I don't want anybody to see this."

"I'll let you go buy your own stuff and he can follow me. I need to pick up supplies for fishing, anyway. Do I get to know your secret ingredients?"

Liam bit his lip, unsure. No one outside the family knew.

"If not, that's okay. As long as there's nothing gross in there."

"Nah, nothing gross. I can't wait for you to try them. You won't believe how good they are."

"Always bragging," Harry teased. He leaned over to peck Liam on the lips before they exited the car. "Go get your stuff and meet me at the front of the store in fifteen minutes. Here." He passed over some cash. "That enough?"

"Plenty. Do I get to keep the change?"

Harry grinned. "Only if you kiss me again."

Liam did, backing Harry up against the car door and letting him have it, all the sexual frustration he'd been feeling for a week.

"Damn," Harry breathed when Liam let up. "This is torture, not being able to take it further."

"Better keep me around until the end then, right?"

Thirty minutes later they were back on the road and lost, Liam trying to make sense of the map but not finding any roads that matched the names on it. "I don't get it. This is where the grocery store is, right?"

"Hang on." Harry pulled over and they studied it together, eyes narrowing. "Okay, we were on Canyon Drive."

"Right. That's right here."

"And the highway is... wait, how is it... but we're over... so here's South Canyon Drive... wait, there's a North Canyon Drive, too? Well, that's stupid. Why can't they just make different names for all the streets? Is this our hotel?"

"Um... I think so, yeah. Because we passed that street there."

"So we're on North Canyon. What fucking morons mapmakers are. Make it hard, why don't you?" he yelled at the map before flipping the car around to go back the way they came.

"Too bad we don't have a map like Dora's. It would talk to us and we'd sing songs," Liam joked.

"Dora? Like... that little kid's show?"

"Yeah! You've never seen it?"

"No, I'm never around kids. My best friend has a daughter and I go to their parties, but I don't spend a lot of time with them."

"How do you feel about kids, Harry?" Liam asked, watching Harry's profile as he drove.

"Wow, we suddenly went deep, didn't we?"

"Well, it's something we should talk about. You don't seem like the type to want kids."

"I... kids scare me."

"Really? Why?"

"I just don't understand them. I mean, Lou's daughter is great. I can play games with her and she says the most hilarious things and she's not whiny and she doesn't cry all the time and I actually have a lot of fun with them. But most kids aren't cool like that."

"How would you know if you don't spend time with them?"

"I just know. I've been around enough to know."

"So are you saying you don't want kids?"

"I'm saying... I'm intimidated by the idea. Lou thinks having a kid would complete me somehow, make my life whole or something. Is this a dealbreaker for you, Liam? If I say I don't want kids, are you gonna dump me?"

"No, but I'm curious. So you don't want them? And don't lie, I won't hate you if you say no."

"I don't know. I'm not sure right now, and that's the truth. I don't know what I want, Liam. Most guys come onto this show knowing exactly what they want, but I'm kind of... keeping an open mind. I figure if it's right, I'll feel it. I won't be able to ignore it."

Liam nodded slowly. "And have you yet? Felt it?"

"You know I can't answer that."

Liam did know, but had been hoping Harry would give him a hint anyway. He was pretty sure Harry felt it with Louis, at the very least. "So as far as kids go... maybe someday but not now?"

"You really want kids, don't you?" Harry asked, avoiding the question.

"My dogs fill the hole pretty well. Plus they don't talk back when I yell at them. Well, except for Chachi. He gives me this little whiny bark thing. Acts all big and tough when he's tiny, like he can take on anyone... Hey, there's the lake! Wait, is that our lake?"

"It should be." Harry took the turn off the main road, driving them closer to the water. "There should be a boat waiting. We're going to fish for half the day, then we'll see what we can make of dinner."

"Harry! You got me a campfire, didn't you?"

"Told you I would," Harry grinned. "There might even be a tent in your future."

Liam busted up laughing, bouncing in his seat. "I love it! You're totally the coolest date ever."

"I do my best," Harry said smugly.

"Can we make out in the tent?"

"As long as no clothes come off. And there's no uh... explosions."

"Oh. So not too much making out, then."

"No. Not too much."

"That's okay, we still have our sex date later to look forward to."

"Liam!" Harry spluttered, practically speechless as they parked and the camera crew started heading over.

"What? You know you can't wait to get some of this."

"I... am not allowed to comment on my plans for you. Assuming I have any."

"But you do." Liam unlatched his seatbelt and leaned over for a kiss, teasing Harry with his tongue.

"You're gonna kill me," Harry complained. "Like I'm not sexually frustrated enough?"

"Join the club, buddy. Now let's go catch something to eat for dinner. Besides the hot dogs. Don't forget the cooler!"

Liam hopped out of the car, Harry shaking his head as he watched. There was certainly no one else in the world like Liam Payne.

* * *

Harry didn't like the worms. He'd seen people on T.V. use things like cheese so when he shopped for bait, he'd gotten a package of that. Liam took one look at it and started rowing them back to shore where there was a small bait shop, and when he returned with live worms packed in dirt, Harry made a squeamish face.

"Dude, trust me. The fish like this better because it's alive and moving, it gets their attention. Cheese is colorful but boring."

"I'm not touching those."

"Yes, you are."

"Uh, no. I'm not."

"Be quiet and row the boat."

Harry did, grimacing as Liam pulled worms out of the containers and impaled them on hooks. "Oh my god, they're freaking out, look at them squirm! Do they have to die for us?"

"Harry, the fish are going to die for us, too. Think about it."

"Oh. Right. So we can eat them. I hadn't thought of that. But the worms... they freak me out."

"Because worms are creepy-crawlies. Look." Liam held one up to Harry's face, grinning, and Harry let out a shriek.

"You're a little shit, you know that? I thought you were trying to win me over."

"Relax, Harry," Liam chuckled. "This is good," he commented, referring to their location. "Put the oars down and we can fish from here."

Harry glanced around the lake, seeing a few other boats scattered around (and ignoring the camera behind them), and took a deep breath. "Okay. Show me what to do."

"I baited your first hook for you, so you don't have to touch the creepy worms, okay?"

"Thank you. Don't you dare call me a sissy."

"I'm not going to. Now here."

Harry took the pole, jerking when the hook swung closer to him. "It's still moving!"

"It has to be, Harry! Oh my god, you're hilarious. Okay, watch me. Just like this." Liam cast his line, both of them watching the weight sink into the water. "Didn't you ever have to do this when you were a kid? You said you went fishing."

"Yeah, but my dad did everything for me. He didn't trust me, always acted like I was too stupid to learn."

"Well, you're not stupid. Now try it."

Harry's first attempt was an embarrassment, but after a few more tries he got it working better and smiled when his hook disappeared under the water not too far from Liam's. "There. That's good, right?"

"That's perfect. You get a kiss."

"Oh. Is that my prize every time I do it right?"

"Hell yeah."

They grinned at each other before locking lips, losing themselves in it so that when Harry's line started tightening and then being tugged, he didn't notice it right away. The pole jerked in his hand and he jumped, almost dropping it in the water before Liam managed to catch it. "Dude! You got something, reel it in!"

Getting his pole under control, Harry reeled in a sizable fish, beaming with pride as it flopped around on the hook. "Liam, look! Look, it's huge!"

It was in no way huge, but Liam nodded anyway. "It's great! Now let me get it off the hook, hang on." Liam caught the slippery thing, working to remove the hook as Harry watched with a frown.

"It's... "

"What?"

"Liam, it's... look at its mouth."

"What's wrong with it?"

"It's just opening and closing and... " Liam worked it loose and held tight to the fish, Harry still watching closely. "Now what?"

"Now we put it out of its misery."

Harry realized right before it happened what Liam was going to do, and with another shriek he knocked the fish out of Liam's hands and into the water.

"Harry, what the hell?"

"We can't kill it! Did you see its eyes? And the way it was trying to breathe? Liam, we can't kill it! It's a living creature!"

Liam blinked at Harry for a long time, thinking at first he was being pranked. "Are you serious? Dude, we have to kill it to eat it."

"I know, I just... I hadn't thought about that. Can we just catch them and throw them back? They'll still live that way, right?"

After another moment of silence, Liam started laughing. "You bring me out here to go fishing, but you don't want to kill the fish."

"I hadn't thought about it, okay? I'm sorry. I suck as a date. And as a man. But did you see its little eyes? The way it was staring at me? It was so scared." When there was no response from Liam, Harry asked, "Did I just ruin this date?"

"No, it's okay, I get why it upset you, I just never imagined you to be that kind of guy."

"Why? Does it make me a sissy?"

"It's not that, I just didn't think you'd care so much for a random fish in a lake."

"It's still life, Liam. Life is precious. Oh god, do you hunt, too?"

"No. That much I can't handle, even when I was a kid I hated it. My dad and my uncle do it sometimes, but I don't go. I can't stand to see the deer bleeding and in pain."

"That's how I feel about the fish, okay? I can't kill it."

"That's fine, Harry. It's funny, and I'm gonna tease you about it for the rest of your life, but it's fine." They linked hands, Liam smiling.

"The rest of my life, huh?"

"You know it."

"You're so cocky. I don't know how the other guys don't all kill you in your sleep."

"I'm sure some of them want to," Liam grinned. "But I got Louis and Niall to protect me, so I'm good."

Harry nodded slowly, gaze on the water as he returned to his usual calm state. "I find it interesting that whenever I'm with any of the three of you, we end up talking about the other two. That doesn't happen with the other contestants. You're all pretty close, aren't you?"

"Yeah, I guess we are. But other guys are close, too. Scott and Peter are always together, and Ryan hangs out with Mike a lot."

"That may be true, but when I'm with those guys it's... you know what? I'm not supposed to talk about it. Subject change!"

Liam wasn't ready to let it go yet. "Is it a bad thing, though? That we're friends and talk about each other?"

"No, I don't see it as bad," Harry shrugged. "Just... different. I figured it would be all fighting, all the time."

"Well, you have to have people to lean on, you know? Because there is a lot of fighting and drama and they all really hated Louis in the beginning. He needed a friend, so I'm glad we were there."

"You seem like the kind of person who makes friends with everyone. Even on our group date, when you were bragging and trying to get my attention, I didn't sense a lot of hostility. Well, not until I spent so much time helping you ski. I really shouldn't have done that, I guess, it wasn't fair to them, but I wanted to. And I had fun."

"That's all that matters then." Liam squeezed Harry's hand, Harry smiling back at him, and they shared a moment of simply enjoying each other's company.

"So you really won't let me kill the fish?"

"I... would really rather you didn't. Because I won't be able to eat them. I'm sorry, I should've thought this through more. It's been years since I fished."

"It's okay, we're still hanging out together and I don't have to share you. What we do isn't important."

"That's true, I'm all yours for the day. Are you having fun, though? I mean, besides the fish thing."

"Yes! And the fish thing gives me ammunition to tease you later, so it's all good."

"Shut up," Harry laughed. "I can't believe we've been sitting here more than ten minutes without you trying to kiss me."

"Oh damn, I'm slacking. Come here."

Harry let it happen, giggling until their lips met. Their kiss was slow and lingering, Harry's tongue lazy against Liam's, and when they finally parted Liam smiled. "You like me. A lot."

"I never said I didn't."

"You like kissing me, too."

"I do. I won't lie about that."

"Want to go find our tent and make out?"

Laughing, Harry replied, "We need to do more than that today. Not that sitting here kissing you isn't fun, but it's getting hot and I'm getting cramped."

Liam put his brain to work. "I saw some signs by the shop when I bought the worms. There are trails around here, we could do some hiking."

"That I can handle. Let's get some water from the shop."

They spent a couple hours hiking, Harry much more at ease with that than fishing, which had obviously been outside his comfort zone. Liam appreciated that he'd tried, though, and loved it when Harry held his hand for most of the hiking, even physically helping him at times when their trail took them through difficult terrain.

Both were starving by the time they returned to the shop, and Harry led Niall back to the car. "I'm ready for those hot dogs now. I hope you can cook them over an open fire."

"We'll manage. And since there's a campfire, there'd better be s'mores."

"Greedy, aren't you?" Harry turned on the car. "I get you a campfire _and_ a tent, and you still want more. Are you always this demanding?" he teased.

"Not really. I just like to tease you. You bring out the little shit in me, I guess. And I still have to get you back for the rose ceremony. That was mean!"

Harry busted up as they drove out to the main road. "Your face. Oh my god, you really thought I was gonna send you home."

"It's not funny! You were messing with my heart, man. That's not cool."

"No, I guess it wasn't, and I'm sorry for that. I didn't mean to scare you. I mean... I _did_ , but... oh, who am I kidding? It was so worth it. Your face was priceless."

"Okay, we can mess around about a lot of things, but not that. It was funny once—next time, it'll just be mean. Please don't make me suffer that again."

Reaching for Liam's hand, Harry promised, "I won't. But I hope you know there was never a doubt, you were never going home."

"Not this week, anyway. Next week it could be a different story." When Harry was silent, Liam bit his lip. "It's scary, Harry. For all of us."

"I know. And I wish I could say more, could really tell you guys everything I'm feeling, but I'm not allowed to. If the viewers know everything when they watch this, if you guys know everything, the drama level drops and it becomes boring. They drill that into my head, you know."

"I know. It must be hard."

"Probably not as hard as it is for you guys. I know what I'm thinking; you guys don't. Then again, there are a few of you I really don't know what _you're_ thinking, so I guess that's fair."

"Want to know? I could probably tell you," Liam teased. "I talk to everyone."

"I bet you do." Turning into the campgrounds, Harry let go of Liam's hand. He drove through until he found theirs, pulling in with a smile as Liam got excited over the tent.

"It's huge! And everything's all set up, too! Usually we have to put up the tent ourselves."

"I know, but if we couldn't even figure out a map, can you imagine what a disaster our tent would be? We will have to start our own fire, though." Stepping out of the car, Harry grabbed the cooler they'd filled while Liam picked up his backpack and closed the door.

"I got that, no problem. Are there s'mores in that thing?"

"The ingredients for it, yes. But you have to make me hot dogs first, then you get your reward."

"Deal."

There were chairs set up around the fire pit as well as a picnic table. Harry let Liam go to work, sitting back in a chair and studying him, chuckling when Liam would do something silly. "Don't burn yourself."

"I'm not! Just because you've never done this, doesn't mean I don't know what I'm doing."

"I've done it. Just not for a long time."

"Did you and your dad used to come camping?"

"When I was little, yeah. But like I said, my dad wouldn't let me do much myself. I kept wanting him to teach me everything but he would say it was too hard for me or that I'd ruin it."

Liam looked back over his shoulder at Harry. "That's not something a father should say. Dads should be encouraging, you know? My dad always was."

"You two are pretty close?"

"Yeah. He teases me sometimes about not wanting to hunt, but my dad's proud of me."

"How did you get started?"

"With the hot dogs?"

"Yeah."

"My dad got laid off for a while when I was a teenager. My mom was working, but she had a job that hardly paid anything, and I felt like it was my responsibility to try to provide. I used to buy a hot dog sometimes on the way home from school, and one day I started talking to the guy who owned the cart, asked him how to get into something like that. He was really cool, let me work with him for a while and paid me, and when I saved up enough money I got my own cart. We used to joke around about being in competition, and I'd set up my cart across the courtyard from him. He always made more money than me, because he'd been there for years, but then I started making it fun for the customers. I'd make them laugh and get their attention, and it got better but he was still beating me. So I decided to make the best hot dogs in the world, and tried a bunch of different things, and finally found a combination that worked!"

"And the rest is history?"

"Pretty much. My customers loved the dogs and would tell their friends how good they are, and you know, everyone has to come by the courthouse at some point. For a case, or jury duty, or even to get married. And they'd see me and be like 'Oh hey, you're Liam! My friend told me you have amazing hot dogs!' and they'd try them and... yeah. Now I own locations all over the state."

"But not just carts, right?"

"No, actual restaurants! Well, more like stands, but still. And we do French fries and corn dogs and even some chicken now, but most people come for the hot dogs."

"I'm hungry now, all this talk about food. And I almost feel sorry for the guy who let you work with him."

"Oh, Steve? Don't feel bad for him, he works for me now. He loves it, too, he manages a few of my restaurants."

"Seriously? How does the guy not resent you?"

"He tasted my hot dogs, that's how. Realized he couldn't compete, so instead he joined me."

Watching Liam root through the cooler for supplies, Harry remarked, "I think it had more to do with the fact that you're so... you."

"Me?" Glancing up, Liam stopped moving.

"Yes. You. So full of life, and you like everybody, and even when you're demanding and greedy I find myself liking you. I'm not sure how you do it, but you're amazing, Liam."

Liam licked his lips. "I know that look. You really want to kiss me right now."

"I really really do," Harry nodded, and when Liam pulled him up out of the chair he went willingly, hands running up Liam's arms to cup his face as Liam's mouth opened to him. Liam sensed immediately that this kiss was different than any of their previous ones; he'd said or done something that changed Harry's view of him, and for the first time Liam felt that he had a real shot against Louis. Harry's tongue was demanding, his fingers rougher in Liam's short hair, and when Liam reached into Harry's hair, their hips brushed together to bring a soft whine out of Harry.

"Tent," Liam whispered, and Harry nodded but then immediately stepped back, shaking his head instead.

"No. Bad idea. Let's just... focus on food for now. I feel like with you we don't talk enough, and I we need to. It can't be all sex between us or it'll never work."

Liam knew that to be true, but he grinned. "Sex is fun, though."

"We definitely have that in common. But I got you a campfire and a tent. You owe me hot dogs. Get to work, sexy."

"If you can keep your hands off me," Liam teased, and Harry moved back into the chair.

"Not moving again until food is ready. Is it alright if I watch you, though? I won't share your secrets with the world."

"Yeah, but will he?" Liam nodded toward the cameraman, who laughed and offered to turn the camera off but only while Liam was preparing the hot dogs.

After thanking him, Liam made quick work of the preparations so that the camera was only off for ten minutes, joking once it was back on that they should've gotten a quickie in while they had the chance. Harry laughed, standing up to kiss Liam again but not letting it get quite so heated this time. "Can I do anything to help?"

"Just sit there and look pretty. Which you do very well."

"I do, don't I?"

"And you say I'm the one with the ego?"

"I think we both have that problem," Harry chuckled.

"So we're perfect for each other."

"I keep wanting to kiss you. Badly."

"That's not a problem, Harry."

"It is when you're trying to cook." Harry sat down again, resting his hands in his lap and crossing his legs.

"You can help with that much. Here, roast your own wienie."

Giggling, Harry joined Liam near the fire, and together they "roasted wienies."


	8. Chapter 8

Harry understood Liam's enthusiasm for his creation after taking one bite, and he knew why Liam was so successful. He kept raving about how amazing they were and would have eaten an entire package by himself if Liam didn't stop him.

"Trust me, you'll make yourself sick. I've done it. I think Louis said he's done it, too."

"Really?" Harry asked through a mouthful of food. "I don't blame him."

"Here, you've got mustard on you." Liam grabbed a napkin and wiped below Harry's lips. "You're really adorable, you know that? The thing with the fish... that surprised me."

Harry blushed. "Can we never talk about that again?"

"No, because it showed something I wouldn't have guessed about you."

"That I have a heart?"

"That you have a big heart. I didn't know a lot about you before coming here, except that you were famous and gorgeous and a model. I never thought I could ever have a chance with someone like you."

"Why not? You're gorgeous, too."

"Yeah, but I'm not part of your world, Harry. Guys like you... they don't notice guys like me."

"I'd love to say that's a lie." Harry wiped his mouth with a napkin and tossed it into the fire. "Sadly, it's the truth. I meet a lot of guys, and I do end up in bed with plenty. But none of them are guys I want to keep around. That's what Lou was trying to get across to me, I think." He leaned back in the chair and rubbed his full belly. "That coming onto a show like this would force me to open my eyes to regular guys."

"Regular guys can be good in bed, too."

Harry laughed, reaching over to take Liam's hand in his. "I believe it. So far I've had more fun with you than anyone I've ever met."

"Really?" Liam asked in excited disbelief. "Your whole life?"

"My whole life," Harry nodded. "I consider myself lucky to be spending time with you. Everyone likes you, dude. I don't know how you're still single."

"Well... mostly because I work all the time. I've dated and stuff, but nothing serious. I tried a serious boyfriend about a year ago and it didn't work."

"Why not?"

"I was too busy. He always wanted to get together after work and I'd get calls for an emergency. But being my own boss, I don't have set hours. I can do things during the day, and he couldn't."

"Dating a model would be perfect, then," Harry joked. "I don't have a set schedule either."

"No, but you do travel a lot, right?"

"I do. What about weekends? Couldn't you get together with your boyfriend on the weekends?"

"Our busiest time? No way."

"Ah. So does the travel bother you?"

"Only because I feel like I'd never see you. Where do you actually live?"

"In L.A. I have apartments all over the world, though."

"Is there one in New York, by chance?"

"There is," Harry grinned. "How have I never had your hot dogs?"

"I'm guessing you don't eat at uh... regular places."

"I do eat at a lot of fancy restaurants. Places to be seen. I bet Lou's had them. She eats 'regular' food."

"You have to keep that body looking good, too, I bet. Too many hot dogs would be bad."

"I suppose." Sighing, Harry reached out both hands. "Come here. You're too far away."

Liam curled up in his lap, the folding chair creaking under them. "Are we good?"

"I think so. If it breaks, it breaks. Just lean away from the fire," he commanded with a laugh.

"That's easy, I just lean on you."

They smiled into each others eyes before leaning in to kiss lazily for a while. A booming clap of thunder made them both jump, hearts thumping loudly as the sky was lit up with lightning. "Shit," Liam muttered. "I forgot about the storm."

"So did I."

In seconds they were bombarded as the sky opened up, fat drops of water raining down on them. "Tent!" Liam yelled, then dove for it.

Harry made sure the cameraman had a safe place to hide and waited for him to disappear into the car before joining Liam in the tent. "Don't forget there are cameras in here. I know you're gonna try to get me naked."

"You say that like it's a bad thing," Liam joked. "Come kiss me. At least take off your shirt, I bet you're magnificent under those clothes."

"I am pretty amazing to look at," Harry admitted. "And I know that sounds conceited, but it's the truth. I don't understand why people think it's wrong to admit it when you've got something good going for you."

"As long as you don't make it a habit or make everyone else feel bad because we don't look as good, it's fine." Liam laid back onto the blanket and pillows that had been set up, watching Harry toss the hat aside and peel off his shirt; he was grateful for the small lantern that had been set up in here. "Jesus," he whispered. "You're beautiful. How did I end up alone with you in a confined space like this?"

Harry grinned. "Because you're worth it, silly. You make me laugh, and I love being with you. And you're hot, there's that." He reached down to lift Liam's shirt over his head, eyes heating up as he took in smooth skin. "So hot."

Liam dragged Harry down over him, kissing him hard and relieved when Harry met it with the same level of passion. He knew they couldn't take this too far, but he was going to do what he could to make sure he got another date with Harry.

Things were going well, or so Liam thought, when Harry lifted his head. "Wait."

"What? No waiting." He attempted to pull Harry back down but Harry sat up, shaking his head.

"What did you mean earlier? You said you were surprised I had a big heart. Am I that much of a dick normally?"

_Shit. Shit shit shit._ Now Liam knew how Niall felt, screwing everything up when it was going so well. "You're not a dick, no. But you give off this vibe sometimes... "

"Go on."

"Harry, can't we just kiss?"

"No. I want to hear more about this vibe of mine. Why is it so hard to believe I have a big heart? I care about people."

"I know that. I've seen that, the way you treated me in the snow was so sweet. You didn't have to be nice about that, I wasn't expecting that."

"See? That's what I'm talking about. Why wouldn't I be nice?" When Liam started stumbling over his reply, Harry squeezed his hand. "It's okay. I'm not mad and you didn't ruin anything. I'm just trying to understand why you... oh. And probably Louis, too. Is that why he didn't like me at first? He thought I was a dick?"

Incapable of lying, Liam chose not to answer.

"It all makes sense now," Harry commented. "But what is it I do that makes people think that of me? I never really cared what anyone thought, but I'm starting to. Because you guys matter to me."

"I think... " Liam hesitated, looking for a way to say it that wouldn't upset Harry. "I think maybe that's it. You put off this vibe like you don't care what people think."

"But so do you. If you cared what people said or thought, you wouldn't be so relaxed and fun. Why is it people like that about you but hate it in me?"

"I do care, Harry. When people don't like me, it hurts. A lot."

"But _everyone_ likes you. You've never really had to deal with being ridiculed, have you?"

Liam shrugged. "Not since school. I used to be called 'weird' all the time."

"Yeah, but I bet it wasn't in a cruel way. When I was growing up, I was called all kinds of names. None of them were nice."

"People are stupid, Harry. You're beautiful."

Harry smiled, touched. "I don't think you have a cruel bone in your body, Liam. Maybe that's why it's different. I can be cruel. And I've taken pleasure in it. When people cross me, I get even."

Liam sat up, scooting closer to Harry and wrapping his arms around Harry's waist. "It's better to let it go," he said softly, but still loud enough to be heard over the rain pelting the tent. "People who do you wrong aren't even worth your time."

"I don't... let myself care about a lot of people."

"I can tell. But if you want to find a husband, or even a boyfriend, you have to care. You have to open yourself up." He lifted his lips to kiss Harry's neck, nuzzling his face in the warmth and continuing, "You'll never find love otherwise."

Harry closed his eyes and dipped his face down to meet Liam's for a long kiss, Liam eventually pulling him back down to the pillows. "Just relax and let it happen," Liam whispered, and it was quiet in the tent as Harry did.

Slowly the kisses turned into caresses, Harry's lips traveling over bare skin to follow his hands down Liam's chest. There was nothing hurried or desperate about it, though since time was short it easily could've been. When Harry's lips stopped moving, Liam opened his eyes to a flash of bright red in front of his face, which lit up with a gasp. "Really?"

"Really," Harry chuckled, trailing the rose down over Liam's torso and raising goosebumps over his skin. "God, you're beautiful."

"Stop," Liam blushed, a hand coming up to stroke Harry's hair.

"If you ever think I don't like you or you're not wanted, just remember this: I hate camping."

"You do?"

"Everything about it. I hate bugs, I hate being away from civilization, I hate what humidity does to my hair. But for you, I did this. You're worth it, Liam. And you're beautiful." Liam stared up at Harry in silence until Harry said, "You need a shirt on so I can do this properly."

"No fun." But Liam sat up, reaching for his shirt and tugging it down over his head.

When it was in place, Harry asked, "Liam, will you accept this rose?"

"You know I will."

Harry fastened it and they kissed again, Liam climbing up to straddle Harry's hips, and eventually Harry had to push him off. "I need to get you back, it's late."

"So what?"

"Come on," Harry chuckled. "Our poor cameraman needs his sleep. And so do I, I have a big day tomorrow."

"Oh, any hints? Where you going? Who you taking?"

"Nope, not happening."

Once Harry was clothed again, they crawled out of the tent and were pleasantly surprised to find the rain had stopped for a moment. "Wow, look at the stars," Liam said, head tipped back.

"There must be millions."

"Trillions, even." Liam leaned back against Harry, whose arms slid around his waist. "If you see a shooting star, make a wish."

"I've never believed in that, Liam."

"You don't believe in luck?"

"Well... it's worked for me once or twice."

"It'll work again. Do you see any?"

"No. Come on, let's-wait! I see one!"

"Where?" Liam looked up in hope, gaze roaming the sky, but when he saw nothing he spun around to find Harry's eyes closed, his lips moving silently. Once his eyes opened, Liam smirked, "What did you wish for?"

"Always so curious." Harry took Liam's hand in his and pulled him toward the car.

"Come on! Tell me!"

"Nope."

"Are we just gonna leave this stuff here?"

"A crew comes out to clean it up." Harry hadn't even noticed the cameraman filming them for once and was surprised to find the car empty. He spun around. "Hey, Rich. Can you drive us back? The car cameras will cover everything."

"No problem."

Harry pulled Liam into his arms once the car was moving, both of them cuddled up in the backseat.

"I was afraid I ruined it with the fish thing."

"You didn't ruin anything," Harry said again, kissing the top of Liam's head. "What you did was get me thinking. I had no idea I put out that bad of a vibe."

"Really? Not even a little bit?"

"Well, maybe a tiny bit. You have to maintain an image, you know?"

"Why?"

"Because it's my job."

"Maybe you're in the wrong business."

"Modeling makes me happy, Liam."

"There's no reason you can't be a _nice_ model, Harry."

Harry laughed, hugging Liam tight.

"Think I'll get another date with you?"

"I can't answer that, Liam,"

"I think I will. If you keep me around."

"Just don't ruin my rep and go telling all the guys I'm not man enough to kill a fish."

"Aww. Your secret's safe with me," Liam whispered.

They giggled before kissing again, the rest of the drive passing in a blur of lips and roaming hands. When the car pulled up at the hotel, Harry stepped out with Liam.

"May I walk you to the room?"

"Of course."

Harry gave him one last kiss at the door. "I'll see you at the cocktail party, okay?"

"What about tomorrow?"

"No, the guys are meeting me at the location. Thank you, Liam. I had a lot of fun today."

"Me, too. Think how much more fun we can have if you keep me around for the sex dates. And you can come home with me to meet my dogs."

"Not pushy at all, are you?" Harry teased.

Liam grinned and went in for one more kiss. "This sucks, having to share you."

"I know. I'm sorry." He stepped back with a smile. "Goodnight, Liam."

"Goodnight, sissy."

"You're such a little shit!"

"Just making sure you don't forget me." Liam winked, and then he disappeared through the door.

* * *

Most of the guys were gathered in the large suite's massive living room, huddled around the television in the semi-dark. Liam heard blood-curdling screams and the sound of a chain saw and kept walking, setting his backpack down on the kitchen table before reaching into the refrigerator for a beer. When he turned around he jumped, both Louis and Niall standing in the flickering glow from the next room like the creepy twins from _The Shining_.

"Jesus, you guys! You scared the shit out of me!"

"Sorry." Niall moved to the fridge, Liam stepping out of the way to allow him to grab a couple sodas.

"No beer?" Liam questioned.

"We've had enough beer today," Louis replied, taking the can Niall passed him.

"And plenty of other things as well," Niall added.

At Liam's raised eyebrow, Louis supplied, "We got a little buzzed earlier."

"Whoa, I missed Niall drunk?"

"Mostly he just giggled a lot. Dude is a lightweight."

"Leave me alone, I don't drink much anymore." Niall elbowed Louis, who pretended it hurt. "Oh be quiet, that's nothing compared to the way you get shoved around on the pitch."

"I'm injured, remember?"

"Yeah, what about that? You seem perfectly healthy to me."

"Me too," Liam agreed. "Are you faking?"

"No, my knee really does hurt if I'm on it too long. I just have to be careful. And I smile through the pain."

"You'd better hope you don't get on that group date tomorrow," Liam smirked. "Harry said something about it being a 'big day.'"

Louis and Niall exchanged a glance, Louis smirking.

"What?" Liam asked.

"The date card came earlier today," Niall responded. "We're both going."

"Oh. Wow, it came today?"

"Yeah, we were all surprised."

"That's cool, that you both get to go," Liam commented, but Niall sensed the smile was forced.

"How was fishing?"

"It was—wait, how'd you know?"

"The date card. I figured out that much."

"What was the shelter thing?" Louis asked.

"Oh! He got me a tent!" Liam grinned.

Niall blinked. "He really did? You demanded a tent and he got you one?"

"Yep. And a campfire, too. He's so amazing, you guys."

Thinking back to his own date, where Harry had managed to satisfy quite a bit of his needs, Louis nodded. "So how was it today? You got a rose, that's something."

"Of course I did. He really likes me, guys. I can tell."

"That's no surprise," Niall commented. "Everyone does. So you fished and... had a campfire?"

"Well, we—you know what? Can we go to our room and talk?" Liam had noticed the volume of the television drop.

"Yeah, let's do that."

Liam picked up his backpack and they said goodnight to the men in the living room, making their way down the hall to the room they shared.

"I still need a shower, so let's make this quick."

Louis and Niall sat on their beds while Liam unpacked the bag and got out of his clothing, leaving the boxers on as he talked. He was careful with the rose, setting it on his pillow.

"So we went to the store and got stuff for the hot dogs. He finally ate them."

"Well, that explains the rose," Louis teased.

"Shut up!" Liam shoved Louis playfully. "I got the rose because he likes me!"

"Suuuuuure. So you cooked him hot dogs."

"First we went fishing, then hiking, then we had food and it rained so we—wait a minute! We never got the s'mores! Damn him, he owes me."

Niall rolled his eyes. "And I'm sure he'll hear about that first thing in the morning when he shows up for our date."

"No, you guys are meeting him there."

"He told you that?" Niall asked in surprise.

Louis' eyes narrowed. "What else did he tell you?"

"Nothing. I tried, trust me. He just said it's a big day and that you guys are meeting him there. Wherever 'there' is."

"My guess is the Grand Canyon," Louis said. "I mean, who comes to the South Rim and doesn't go see it?"

"He might be saving that for the one-on-one date, though. It would be romantic, I bet."

Liam frowned at Niall's words. "I hadn't thought of that. So you didn't get the one-on-one."

"No." Niall looked down, and Liam was tempted to go hug him but he continued, "It's fine. I think he's afraid to be alone with me anyway."

"Niall, I'm sure that's not-"

"It is, Louis. I scare him. I need to work on opening up."

After an awkward silence, Liam continued, "So we roasted hot dogs and then it started raining, and we spent the rest of the date in the tent. And that's about it."

Louis finally asked the question they both needed an answer to. "Did you guys... get any closer? Physically?"

Liam picked up a clean t-shirt he'd had packed in the bag. "Can one of you grab my suitcases while I'm in the shower?"

"Liam, answer the question."

"Why, so you can both hate me?"

The bitterness behind it surprised both Louis and Niall. "We're not going to hate you, Liam," Niall replied. "How could we? You're in the same boat we are."

"Dude, if you ever think I could hate you... " Louis rose from his bed and moved to Liam, pulling him in close. Liam's arms came up to cling tight. "You're so tense. Relax, buddy. I promise, we won't hate you."

"You will if I win. And after today? I think I have a shot. But I don't want to lose you guys."

Niall stood up, sighing as he wrapped his arms around both of them. "Nobody's losing anybody. Louis and I talked about it earlier, this is going to get harder each day and we have to be prepared to see each other with Harry. It's going to hurt, but what matters ultimately is happiness. Ours _and_ Harry's. If Harry is happiest with you, we'll live with it."

"I don't want to hate you when I lose," Liam whispered.

"Hey." Louis tilted Liam's chin up. "There's no reason for you to think you're gonna lose. It sounds like you two had a great time together. Be perfectly honest, do you think you'll get another date?"

Liam nodded. "He wouldn't answer when I asked him that, but I could tell he wanted to. And when we were in the tent... yeah. He likes me. A lot."

"Then don't feel guilty about it," Niall said softly. "You're allowed to be happy that he's falling in love with you. Even when it hurts us."

"I love you guys."

Louis grinned, hugging Liam tight again. "We love you, too. Niall thinks we need to be open with each other about our time with Harry. I'm not so sure, but I will tell you both that he seems to be falling for me. And that it's mutual. It's only going to get harder as the feelings intensify."

"He's totally falling for me," Liam agreed. "At least... I think he is. He acts like he is. Niall?"

Niall stepped out of the group hug, crossing his arms over his chest. "He's attracted to me. As far as falling in love... no. I don't see that. And I'm not feeling a whole lot of that myself, so we're even. There's just this crazy attraction between us."

Liam smirked. "Wait until you get him alone. That's when your heart doesn't stand a chance."

Louis laughed. "It's true. I never imagined he'd win me over so fast. But... he did. He was everything I've always wanted in a date. And I hated that he was the one to be that. Now... all I ever think about is being alone with him again."

"Ugh, why is he so perfect?" Liam complained. "I was feeling so good, like I had it made, and now I'm back to thinking I could never win against you guys."

"Don't," Niall soothed, hugging them both again. "Right now, it sounds like you have a better chance than I do. And remember, when I tell him about Nola, he's going to run away screaming."

Liam held his silence about their conversation, feeling guilty that he'd been digging for hints on that.

"Bottom line, guys," Louis began, "is that we want to be happy. With Harry, with someone else, it doesn't matter. If he isn't the one for us, we need to find the one who is, and the sooner he sends us home, the quicker that'll happen."

"Unless the one who makes us happy is here in this hotel," Liam argued.

They all pulled back and stared at each other, none speaking their thoughts but wondering; it was only natural to consider it. Finally Louis said, "Right now our focus needs to be Harry."

Niall and Liam agreed, and as if on cue they chorused, "To love."


	9. Chapter 9

Even Niall had been baffled by the date card's clues this time, and as the six men boarded a tiny plane he was nervous because he wasn't able to prepare himself in any way; Niall hated being put in situations he couldn't control.

_Yet you're willing to put your heart out there for a man who will probably break it at some point. You are completely illogical, Niall._

The scenery was breathtaking, though, as they flew over the Grand Canyon and finally touched down near a small town that appeared to exist for the sole purpose of sightseers.

Harry greeted them all with hugs, Niall feeling special as he was the only one (excluding Louis, who had been on a one-on-one date) to be included a second time. He hugged Harry tight, enjoying the feel of being in Harry's arms, and noted Louis did the same before they gravitated toward each other again as Niall and Liam had done on their group date. Louis may have been Niall's toughest competition, but Niall wouldn't have wanted to do this without him.

Harry, of course, was almost as breathtaking as the scenery had been. He simply glowed no matter what he was wearing or what the surroundings, and even in an outdoorsy khaki outfit that looked out of place on him, he was beautiful.

"Okay, guys, this is John! He's going to be our guide for the day." Harry gestured toward an older man standing nearby, and the men waved. "We're going river rafting!"

Niall's eyes widened. It wasn't that he was a scaredy-cat kind of guy, but being tossed around by a raging river wasn't something that sounded fun to him in any way. Louis seemed excited, though, as did the other guys; one had even done it before. Niall reminded himself that he'd known this coming on the show, known that there would be adventures of the kind he wasn't used to and that he'd decided it was worth the risk—though getting himself killed wasn't good for Nola's future, either.

"Relax," Louis said quietly, squeezing Niall's shoulder. Of course Louis could read his mind. "It'll be fun, and I'll be right next to you."

Niall smiled up at Louis gratefully, leaning into him.

"Guys, we're moving! Come on!"

They jumped, Harry's command surprising them, and followed John along with the rest of the group.

They were given life jackets and taken through a quick lesson, Niall listening intently to the instructions and filing them away. John assured them the river wasn't too wild and that he did this sort of thing every day and hadn't lost one passenger—yet. Niall didn't find that funny.

"Relax," Louis repeated from his spot next to Niall, an arm laying over Niall's shoulders. "It'll be something you can tell Nola about tonight."

That much was true, and Niall smiled again. Louis always knew what to say. He felt eyes boring into him and glanced to his right, where on the other side of a few guys Harry was staring at them intently. Niall would've given a lot to know what was going on inside that head, but tried for a smile aimed at Harry. Harry looked away and focused on what John was saying.

Eventually they all climbed into a large raft, Niall hating the way it bounced on the river even before it started moving. Louis was right behind him, one hand on his shoulder and the other on an oar. "You okay?" he asked in a low voice.

"Fine," Niall replied, grip tightening on his own oar.

"I'm right here, okay?"

"I know." Through his fear, Niall managed to glance back and silently thank Louis.

"Niall! Up here with me! Kevin, switch places with Niall."

Once again, Harry was demanding Niall at his side. This time it felt different, though, leaving Niall feeling guilty but for what he couldn't have said.

It was awkward as they moved around the raft, squeezing past bodies until Niall was next to Harry. Panic was setting in at being so far away from Louis, who had been managing to make him feel better, or at least safer.

"You okay?" Harry asked, reaching out for Niall's hand.

"Yeah. I just hate not knowing what to expect."

"Don't worry, it'll be fine. I'm right here."

Niall blinked, the familiar words coming out of that mouth a surprise.

"I won't let anything happen to you, Niall."

Niall swallowed and took the hand Harry was offering, clutching tight before they had to place both hands on their oars. As the raft started to move, he looked back over his shoulder at Louis, who smiled at him and gave him a thumbs up.

When it was done they were soaked, exhausted, and laughing. It had been a rush like Niall had never known, and using the tips given to them by John he'd done well, Harry grinning in encouragement at him through much of the ride. They climbed out of the raft dripping wet, all of them gushing and giggling over the experience, and were met with towels and blankets.

Harry called them to attention to announce, "Follow that trail, we have a picnic waiting."

He was immediately surrounded on all sides as the group moved, Louis hanging back some with Niall. "You did fine, see?"

"Yeah, it was fun! I was afraid it would be rougher."

"It can be, I'm sure. They have rafting trips that last days, and I bet those can get wild. This one wasn't too bad."

"No, I'd love to go again. Did you have fun?"

"I did! Even though Harry stole my buddy from me," Louis teased.

"Yeah, what was that?"

"He's jealous."

"Think so?"

"Definitely."

"Of who?"

"That much I can't figure out." Louis steered Niall around a rock in his path, as Niall's attention was on him instead of his surroundings. "I'd kill to know, though."

"You and me both. Maybe he just doesn't like it when the focus isn't on him. He was the same way on the snow date, didn't like it when Liam and I were talking to each other instead of to him."

"Guys, keep up!"

Louis smirked when Harry's voice called back to them. "And now he's jealous again. Maybe it _is_ you, Niall."

"I guess it could be. But it could easily be you, too."

"True. About time he gets a taste of what we're all feeling."

After drying off some more and feasting on the food that had been brought in for their picnic, Harry spent a little time with each guy as he had on the snow date. A couple he simply sat between and talked, two others he led away for a short walk, and then he crooked a finger at Louis.

"Guess it's my turn."

"Leave some for me," Niall teased.

"I'll think about it," Louis grinned, both of them laughing as he stood up to join Harry, who held out a hand to him. "Hi there, beautiful."

"Hello, gorgeous," Harry smiled, leading Louis away from the group. "It's nice to get some time alone with you for a change."

"I could say the same. I hear it went well with Liam last night."

"Of course he told you everything. Don't judge me, okay? I don't like killing defenseless animals."

Louis snorted. "Where did that come from? Damn, what did I miss?"

"Shit. He didn't tell you about the fish?"

"He said you guys went fishing. Not much else about it."

"Well, crap." Cheeks coloring, Harry was silently berating himself.

"What happened?"

"Nothing. We had a wonderful time."

"But you couldn't kill... a fish, I take it?"

"It was staring at me, Louis! With these _eyes_! And it couldn't breathe!"

"So you didn't catch any fish?" Louis smirked.

"No. We ate hot dogs instead. Which are phenomenal, by the way."

"Oh my god, I know. I could eat those things every day for the rest of my life."

"They're so good. Do you fish?"

"I have. I never have a problem killing the fish. I'm not saying that makes you any less of a man, I'm just saying I don't think about it too much.'

"How can you not? Its little mouth is gaping at you, like it's accusing you and saying 'What did I ever do to you? How can you hurt me?'"

Louis giggled. "I'm sorry, but you put way too much thought into it. It's the circle of life, Harry."

"It's murder. And I won't do it."

"No one's asking you to, calm down." Squeezing Harry's hand, Louis said, "You're really kind of adorable, you know that?"

"As opposed to being a dick, you mean?"

"Who says you're a dick?"

"Isn't that what you thought of me when we met? Had this image of what you thought I was supposed to be like?"

"Wow. Where did that come from?"

Harry didn't answer right away, eyes on the greenery around them. "You did, though, right? That's why you were so hard to crack?"

"Yes." There was no point in lying. "I had an opinion of you that was based on everything I'd seen on television and read in magazines. But you come off as a prick in interviews, dude. That was the Harry Styles I expected to meet."

"I have to be careful what I say."

"No, you don't. You'll still be just as beautiful if you show the world you have a heart. Even more beautiful, I'd say."

Harry smiled. "That's what Liam said. That I don't have to be a dick all the time in order to be a model."

"Liam is smart. He comes off like a kid a lot, but he's actually pretty intelligent."

"Yeah. And he doesn't beat around the bush, he just comes out and says things without worrying how it's going to sound. It's refreshing."

"He's quite a guy," Louis agreed. "Oh wait, should I not say things like that? Are you going to get jealous again?"

"What are you talking about?"

"I'm talking about the raft. You making Niall and Kevin switch places."

"I wasn't jealous."

"Bullshit. What I'd like it know is who you were jealous of—Niall or me."

"I can't talk about that, Louis. And it wasn't jealousy."

"It so was!"

"I was worried about Niall, okay? He looked scared."

"And I had it handled. Which bothered you. A lot."

Harry rolled his eyes. "I didn't bring you on this walk so we could argue. We don't get a lot of time, Louis, let's not waste it fighting."

"Just admit you were jealous."

"I don't have to." Harry stopped walking, turning to face Louis while grabbing his other hand as well. "That's the beauty of being the Bachelor, I'm not really allowed to explain my actions."

"Yet you apologized to Niall for treating him as if he didn't exist."

Harry's jaw dropped slightly. "Jesus, do you guys tell each other _everything?_ "

"Not everything. But a lot. We don't want to end up hating each other when this is over."

An emotion rose in Harry's eyes that Louis couldn't name, it wasn't hostile but it certainly wasn't happy. He let go of one hand and dragged Louis back the way they'd come, and Louis panicked.

"Harry. Stop. Can we talk about this?"

"There's nothing to talk about."

"Why are you mad?"

"I'm not mad."

"Okay, but you're something. Is it jealousy?"

"Will you stop? You're as bad as Liam."

"Harry, just... " Louis halted, forcing Harry to do the same. "Stop," he said softly, pulling Harry close. "Just forget it. I'm sorry I said anything, just... kiss me. I miss you."

Appearing to melt, Harry leaned in and captured Louis' lips, both of them sighing into it as their arms wrapped around each other. When they pulled back, Harry whispered, "Why do you have to be so stubborn?"

"Why do you have to be wonderful? Why couldn't you have just stayed the asshole I thought you were instead of making me fall for you?"

"I have to give everyone a chance, Louis. I can't focus on just one person."

"I'm not asking you to. But give me this, little moments like this so I know I'm still in the running."

Harry cradled Louis' face in his hands and whispered, "Trust me. My feelings don't change when I'm not with you. I don't want you any less when we're apart."

"But you want others more. Not more than me, necessarily, but more than you did in the beginning."

"Yes, that's true. I won't lie about that. I'm meeting amazing people who affect me more than I thought possible. But you do that, too. You're still in the running, okay?"

"Okay," Louis replied softly, then kissed Harry sweetly. "You are going to take Niall for a walk, right? He needs that."

"Really? In one breath you're asking for reassurance and in the next you're pushing me toward Niall?"

"I can't help it," Louis shrugged. "He's a great guy."

"You're not used to putting yourself first, are you? Forever the captain at heart."

Louis blushed and started walking again, Harry's hand tight in his. "I make sure everyone's taken care of."

"Even if it means you're not?"

"But I am. You just told me I was. So now I can focus on everyone else."

"Or at least Niall. Because you _like_ Niall. A lot."

"Oh, there's that jealousy again." Beaming, Louis commented, "Guess I know the answer to my question now."

"Shut up, you don't know anything."

"I know enough," Louis smirked as they neared the picnic. "Niall! Your turn!"

Niall looked up from the orange he'd been peeling, quickly wiping his hands on a napkin before standing.

"Bring that with you!" Harry called out. "I'm still hungry."

Louis winked at him as they passed, making Niall chuckle as he broke apart the orange and handed half to Harry.

"What, you're not gonna feed it to me?"

"Oh, please, you're a grown man." Niall started walking, Harry laughing as he moved into place next to him.

"Wow, with you I guess I'm on my own."

"I've got enough to worry about without having to feed you, too."

"Yeah?" Harry popped an orange slice into his mouth. "Like what?"

This would be the perfect time, and yet once again Niall held back. He'd decided earlier that if he didn't get a one-on-one date next week, he'd make sure to tell Harry no matter what, especially after Harry had shown him such kindness on the raft; Harry deserved to know. "Well, I do run the library."

"Totally? I thought you just worked there or were like... an assistant or something."

"No, it's under my command. Being away from it's hard. I don't like leaving it in someone else's hands for so long."

"I'll bet. Feel like you left your little kid at home with a babysitter?" Harry chuckled.

Niall's head swung around fast. Did Harry already know? But Harry wasn't even looking at him, he was biting into another slice of fruit and licking at the juice dripping down his chin. "Here." Niall passed him a wipe, which he'd brought along in his pocket for this express purpose.

"Thanks." He finished the orange, then cleaned his hands before pocketing the wipe. "So how did you end up being a librarian? Just always liked books?"

"No, I was originally going to be a neurosurgeon."

"A brain doctor? Really?"

"Yep. The workings of the mind fascinate me."

"Wouldn't that fall under psychology?"

"Somewhat, but you'd be surprised how much the physical brain affects emotion and thought processes. It isn't just hormones, though again—the physical brain has a lot to do with those, too." Niall finished his pieces of orange, irritated that he didn't have anything to wipe his hands with; sticky fingers annoyed him.

"You have this way of talking to me that doesn't make me feel like an idiot. You're the first smart person I've ever met who can do that, not make me feel stupid."

Touched, Niall said, "Ignorant doesn't necessarily mean stupid. And I'm not calling you ignorant in a bad way, I mean it more as uneducated. Damn, that sounds bad, too. I just mean you haven't learned the information, and that doesn't make you stupid—just uninformed."

Harry laughed, reaching out for Niall's hand. "It's okay, I didn't take it in a bad way. And that's my point exactly." When Niall pulled his hand out of reach, Harry frowned.

"My hands are sticky. You don't want to hold them."

"What, from the orange? Come here." Harry whisked out the wipe, running it over Niall's hand. "It's used, but it's better than nothing. Give me your other hand."

It had been a long time since someone took care of Niall, rather than the other way around, and Niall allowed Harry to clean him. "Thanks," he said softly.

"Anytime." Harry pocketed the soiled wipe again and this time when he held out his hand, Niall took it. "So what happened to the brain doctor thing?"

"Oh, I got married. Ended up having to make money instead of going to school full-time."

"Ever think about going back?"

"Ever think about singing again?"

As an attempt at diversion, it worked. "Not really. It was fun, but I like modeling better."

"What happens when you can't model anymore?"

"Then we'll see what happens. By that time I may be married and ready to settle down. You never know," Harry winked at him.

"But for now, you want to continue what you're doing?"

"I think so. Don't repeat this to anyone, but I'm getting bored."

"With what?" Niall found it funny that Harry seemed to forget this would air at some point in time, and possibly his "secrets" would be told to the world. He also figured they should turn back now, but as Harry didn't mind being away for too long, he certainly wasn't going to say anything.

"Everything. I love modeling but... I don't know. I don't get the rush I used to. I've been turning down more jobs lately, jobs that would be good for my career. Lou... have I mentioned Lou to you?"

"I don't think so?"

"She's my best friend. Also my stylist. She knows me probably better than anyone else in the world, even my own mom. She thinks I need something more in my life. Something to fulfill me, because modeling doesn't always do that anymore."

Niall swallowed, his heart beating faster. "What sort of fulfillment?"

"I'm not sure. Just something that doesn't leave me feeling empty."

"A husband would do that for you. Or even a serious boyfriend."

"Yeah, I'm not so good at those."

"Have you tried a lot?"

"A few. They don't last."

"Why not?" Niall asked. "Can't handle the busy schedule? The fame? The long-distance thing?"

"Uh... no. It's not them who ends it. It's me. I get bored and start to wander. With my body."

"Ah. And that... is something you think you can change?"

"I _know_ it's something I can change. The question is, do I want to?"

"It doesn't make you a bad person if you don't, Harry. You have to be true to yourself."

"See? This is why I like talking to you. I couldn't say this to the other guys, they'd judge me."

"Louis wouldn't."

The reply didn't sit well with Harry, that much Niall could sense immediately. Harry's grip tightened and his mouth appeared to harden.

"I just mean that Louis' open-minded."

"He'd demand faithfulness."

"So would I. So would most people. If you're looking to find a man in this group who won't, I think you'll be disappointed."

"I'm not looking for that. I just don't really know what I want, and jealousy is a new emotion for me. It never bothered me to sleep around before because it never bothered me to think of the guys I was with sleeping around. Does that make sense?"

"It does, actually. And now you're meeting people that make you feel differently? Like you'd have a problem if they were with someone else?"

"Yes! I'm not used to it! It's driving me crazy!"

Niall chuckled, squeezing Harry's hand. "Welcome to love, Harry. It's scary and frustrating and can drive you mad, but it's so worth it when it works out. And we should really get back."

"Shit. You're right."

They turned around to head back to the picnic area, walking in a comfortable silence for a while until Harry said, "If you're wondering why I haven't kissed you yet, it's because I don't trust myself."

"I wasn't, but it's um... nice to know."

"It's not that I don't want to."

"You don't owe me anything, Harry."

"And you don't pressure me, either. I like that."

Niall smiled up at Harry. "I'm glad. I figure if you want to kiss me, you will."

"But I do want to."

"Obviously not badly enough," Niall responded in a flirty tone, surprising even himself.

Harry halted, his gaze darkening as he stared down at Niall. "Don't ever think that."

_There_ was the intensity that rocked Niall every time, that broke open the part of him he tried to keep closed. Breath catching in his throat, he opened his mouth to meet Harry's when it crashed down over his, Harry's hands tugging hard on his hair to bend his head further back. Never had he lost the ability to reason like this, never had someone so completely assaulted his senses that he forgot his surroundings and could think of nothing but _more_ and _need_. "Harry," he whispered desperately, hands clutching at Harry's shirt and fisting into it for something to hold onto as his mouth was devoured.

When Harry stepped back he was breathing heavy, their exhales in time with each other as they both looked away; Harry turned completely away, focusing on the small group in the distance while Niall stared down at his feet.

"Go on," Harry commanded hoarsely. "I'll be there in a minute."

Niall nodded, heading back toward the picnic without a backward glance at Harry. He was mostly calm by the time he arrived, Louis standing to greet him.

"I see the passion's still there," was all he said.

Niall went for a cold bottle of water, swallowing it down before responding. "Well, if nothing else, the sex would probably be great between us."

"That's something." Niall was quiet, and Louis continued, "Hey. Don't feel guilty. This is what we all came here for."

Nodding, Niall watched Harry approach and once again, it was as if it had never happened even though he imagined more than just Louis had witnessed their kiss.

"You guys all ready to go? We're riding horses back up to the plane."

Louis frowned. "Horses? I don't do horses."

Niall chuckled. "You do now. Come on, Louis. This time I'll hold _your_ hand."

As they walked up a trail toward their destination, Harry caught Niall's eye. He smiled, and Niall's lips widened into an answering one.

He missed that mouth already.

* * *

Niall assisted Louis getting on his horse, giggling at Louis' lack of coordination. Louis told him to shut up, that he'd never been on a horse before and "that's the last time I help you when you're scared."

"Okay, okay. Sorry. It's just... that was a life-threatening experience. This is a horse."

"You were never in any danger, Niall."

"And neither are you. Relax."

"This is a living, breathing creature that can throw me off if it decides it doesn't like me. I do have a career to worry about."

"And I have a child," Niall responded quietly. "You wouldn't have let me die, and I won't let you. You're fine. Try talking to him, get to know him. This is Earthquake."

"Of course it is. I bet Harry did that on purpose."

With a chuckle Niall mounted his own horse. "And mine is Stud. What does that say about me?" Niall giggled.

"That you're a whore who's fathered a lot of children."

They both cracked up, but it died quickly for Niall. "I think he might know. He made a comment earlier... and now this. I think he's messing with my head."

"Or giving you the courage to tell him. Maybe you should."

"If I get a one-on-one. Or the next time I'm alone with him, maybe. It hasn't felt right."

"Niall, he deserves to know."

"I know, okay?"

They looked up as John called them all to attention, explaining simple commands and that the horses were used to inept riders but it would help to relax and "get to know your horse."

Louis grinned at Niall. "You know your stuff."

"I used to ride a lot as a kid. And Nola loves them, I take her riding when I can. Someday I'd like to buy her one."

The group set off on the long ride back, Louis and Niall at the rear. Niall kept an eye on Louis and his horse when his gaze wasn't glued to Harry, who looked better than any human should on a horse.

"He seems to know what he's doing," Louis commented.

"He does. He's no stranger to horses. I think that's the happiest I've seen him since we met him."

"I've... actually seen him happy like that before."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. On our date. Not to be a dick about it."

"No, it's fine. So he loves sports and horses. Who knew?"

"Damn, he looks good on a horse," Louis remarked in admiration.

Niall chuckled. "I was thinking the same thing. You can ride up further if you want, go shove Will out of the way."

"No, I'm good right here. Let them fight for his attention, I think you and I are set for a while."

"In what way?"

"With Harry, I mean. He keeps reminding me that his feelings don't change when we're apart. I'm sure it's the same with you."

Niall nodded, thinking of their kiss; the magic had definitely still been there.

About two miles from town, Niall's horse jolted him when its foot sank into a hole, resulting in what John said looked like a sprained ankle. Niall agreed, and it was decided that he would walk the horse back to town. Harry instructed everyone else to follow John ahead, and at the irritated expressions that greeted that he said, "I'd do the same for any of my boys. Go on, I'll be there soon."

Nervous beyond belief at the prospect of being alone with Harry for that long, Niall gave Louis a panicked look.

"I'm not leaving him, Harry."

"Excuse me?" Harry glared in disbelief at Louis.

"Louis, it's fine," Niall said. "Go ahead."

"I'm not riding this thing without you there. What if it throws me?"

"It's not going to throw you."

"You don't know that."

"You can stay, it's fine," Harry interrupted.

Neither of them knew how to take that. He'd seemed annoyed at first but now welcomed it?

Louis climbed down from his horse and took the reins, and the three started walking their horses in the wake of the others, Niall in the middle.

"It's not far, just a couple of miles," Harry reassured them, but truthfully neither minded-time spent with Harry was hard to come by.

"So you ride horses?" Niall asked after an awkward silence had fallen.

"When I can. One of my favorite things to do. I have a horse that I hardly ever get to ride."

"Where?" Louis asked.

"In L.A. There's a stable on my property, and I have a woman who looks after him. He's my baby. I feel bad because he's alone a lot, though Michelle takes good care of him." Harry smirked at the expressions on their faces. "Surprised you, didn't I? You guys need to quit assuming things about me."

"Tell us more, then," Louis suggested. "We need to make an informed decision, too."

"What do you want to know?"

"What's a day in the life of Harry Styles like?"

"Depends on whether I'm working or home or out of town. If I'm working... well, you can imagine. High pressure, everything's rushed and crazy and there's no time to even breathe."

"And do you like that?" Niall asked curiously.

"Most of the time. Lately it's seemed like a lot to deal with."

Louis chimed in with, "And when you're home?"

"When I'm home I spend a lot of time with Fame. That's my horse. But there are parties here and there, and there's also Lou, who lives with me and keeps me sane. And there are dates that turn into more. Actually, I'm lying; usually there isn't much dating involved, it's an excuse to get laid."

Niall blinked at Harry's candor, Louis shaking his head. "You do realize all this is going to be aired at some point, right?"

"I have nothing to hide, and I'm not ashamed. I don't do anything illegal, no drugs and actually not a lot of drinking, either. That's one area of fame I fail miserably at," he grinned ruefully.

Niall smiled and reached out to pat Harry's back. "I don't see that as a failure. I admire it."

"Yeah? Even though I'm a slut?" When Niall and Louis both laughed, Harry shrugged. "That's a sticking point for you two, isn't it? You demand a faithful partner?"

"I do," Niall answered immediately.

"I'm afraid I agree," Louis said. "We've talked about that."

Harry nodded, staring ahead as he said, "It's become something I insist on as well. Never thought I'd say that. I've discovered there's a part of me that doesn't like to share."

Neither replied to that, but it certainly got their hearts racing.

As the little town appeared over a rise, Harry ventured, "So Louis. How about a day in your life?"

"Me? Well, there's soccer of course, and when the season's on that's pretty much my life. Every waking moment is soccer."

"What about when it's off-season?" Niall asked.

"I'm home with my family. In Chicago. I have a house there and spend the time with them and with my friends. Mostly my little sisters and brother and my mom, though Mom's married now so I try not to bother her too much. He's a good guy, though, makes my mom really happy."

"Are you and your sibllings close?"

Louis nodded in answer to Harry's question. "Very. When Dad took off, my mom had to work so I raised them a lot of the time. The oldest is seven years younger than me. Beware when you come home with me, Harry. She'll put you through the wringer to make sure you're good enough for me."

Harry only smiled, not addressing Louis' assumption, before asking, "And you, Niall? What do you do besides the library? Or is that pretty much it?"

It was the perfect opportunity. Niall glanced to his right, Louis nodding minutely in encouragement and Niall knew that if Harry wasn't there Louis would have grabbed his hand. He glanced to his left and met deep green eyes that were honestly curious, and felt a moment of terror like he hadn't known since realizing Barbara was gone forever. How had Harry managed to get under his skin so completely and so quickly? The thought of Harry sending him home scared Niall more than he'd imagined it would now that the moment was upon him.

He chose to focus on Nola, on the beautiful face that smiled up at him every day, the bright blue eyes that favored him with such worship and made him feel like a hero with a simple Band-Aid placed on her knee (of course the kiss to her boo-boo helped, too). She was waiting for him at home, and the ache had been stifled because Niall had needed it to be, but this was when fate would decide her future-and his as well.

He opened his mouth to let the words fall where they may. "I work during the week, pick my daughter up from daycare in the evening and then we go home and have dinner, watch some T.V. or play some games. My mom comes over on the weekends and we go out after I put in a few hours at the library on Saturday morning."

One glance to his left was enough to show Niall that Harry hadn't known, hadn't even had an inkling, because Harry wasn't there; he'd stopped walking at some point, probably right after the word "daughter" was uttered.

Niall drew to a halt as well, Louis stopping next to him to watch Harry carefully. Looking back over his shoulder, Niall waited as his heart tried to beat out of his chest.

"You... have a child?"

What Niall saw and heard from Harry was shock, and probably complete bafflement as to how he should handle this. "I do. She's five. Her name is Nola."

Harry studied Niall, who waited it out. "Where is she right now?"

"At home. My mom's living there until I get back, taking care of her." Niall sensed Louis behind him, a solid wall of support if he needed it, and was glad he'd done this while Louis was present; it helped a little bit, at least, to know that if Harry rejected him, Louis would be waiting with strong arms to comfort him and remind him it was for the best.

Harry started walking again, slowly, leading his horse as he moved. "Do they let you talk to her at all? While you're here?"

"For a few minutes every night." Once Niall was moving forward again, Louis kept pace. With a chuckle Niall said, "Last night when I called she was kicking Mom's ass at Candyland."

Harry laughed, surprising them both. "Lou's daughter always kills me on that one. You wouldn't think it'd be so hard to win."

"It's all about how the cards are stacked."

"True. But it still pisses me off that a four-year-old can beat me at anything. What else does she like?"

"Nola? She loves to ride horses and go to the zoo and her favorite things to watch on T.V. are Animal Planet and 'Diego.' She intends to be a veterinarian when she grows up."

"What the heck is 'Diego'?" Louis asked.

"It's a show on Nickelodeon. He's Dora the Explorer's cousin."

"Dora," Harry muttered. "Of course. No wonder Liam was asking me all those questions about kids! He knows about her, right?"

"Yes, he does," Niall frowned. "He was asking you about kids?"

"Yesterday. He wouldn't let up."

Exchanging a glance with Louis, Niall opened his mouth but then closed it; Harry looked entirely overwhelmed.

The awkward silence was back, the three entering town when Harry suddenly broke it. "I bet you miss her a lot, don't you?"

"More than you can imagine."

Harry nodded, and then they were hailed by the small group of contestants waiting near the outpost. He led the three horses to John and joined the other guys, and once again it was as if the entire conversation had never happened.

"It doesn't matter what he thinks," Louis said softly from behind Niall. "If he sends you home, it's for the best and was never meant to be."

Nodding, Niall nonetheless wished that just once, what he wanted was meant to be.


	10. Chapter 10

The final part of the group date was a party/barbecue thrown in the pool area of the hotel. They had the place to themselves other than the staff catering and supplying them with necessities, and Harry managed to get all of the men in the pool with him for a game of volleyball.

The problem was that most of the guys, Niall included, had a hard time focusing on anything other than Harry in a tiny yellow shorts. He couldn't help feeling that Harry knew this and used it to his advantage, sinking Niall's team of Louis and Max while he jumped around with water dripping off his rippling muscles and glorious abs. Niall hadn't doubted his homosexuality before coming here, but Harry certainly had a way of cementing it with every move.

What both Niall and Louis really hated was the way Harry's teammates found reasons to touch him as often as they could.

After the sun set they changed into warmer clothing and met up again at the pool area for dinner and drinks. Harry flitted from man to man, much like Liam had that first night, and neither of them knew what to expect from Harry in regards to Niall. He hadn't excluded Niall from anything, but he hadn't done anything to make Niall feel like he was wanted, either. Then again, Harry never did around the other guys.

Inevitably Harry started taking them off one by one for a little private time, and each of them was glad Harry and whatever man he happened to be with was out of eyesight; no one wanted to witness another make-out session as they had the previous week with Louis.

After returning with the second man, Harry nodded his head at Louis, who stood quickly to follow Harry to a bench on of the other side of the pool.

"Hi," Louis began hesitantly, not sure what Harry wanted from him, though he was tempted to simply sit on Harry's lap and go for it.

"Hey," Harry smiled, his face lighting up as he pulled Louis down next to him. "You doing okay?"

"I'm great."

"Have fun today?"

"Yeah. I was a little nervous about the horse, but I'm sure it was nothing compared to your freakout over the fish," Louis teased, trying to kill some of the awkwardness that seemed to be cropping up; Louis hated any kind of awkward with Harry, especially after they'd come so far.

"Be quiet, you." He reached for Louis' hand, clasping it tight. "I can't believe you've never been on a horse."

"I can't believe you've never been fishing."

"I have, just not for a lot of years. Besides, Liam loved being able to teach me something. It made him feel good about himself."

"I'll bet it did. I'm still surprised he didn't come home bragging about it last night."

And here they were talking about Liam again. What had changed in the time since the picnic? Harry had assured Louis that his feelings wouldn't change and yet somehow something had. He knew he'd done nothing wrong and wondered if it had to do with the discovery of Nola.

"Yeah, that surprises me, too," Harry said now. "I assumed he would."

"Now who's making assumptions?" Louis joked.

"Good point."

What scared Louis most was the fact that Harry wasn't looking him in the eye much. Before he hadn't been able to take his eyes off Louis. "Did... something change, Harry?" He silently berated himself for asking, hating that he sounded like a whiny girlfriend.

"In what way?"

Now he had Harry's attention. "I don't know. You said your feelings don't change when we're apart, but something sure did. I feel it."

Harry sighed, squeezing Louis' hand tighter. "I'm doing a horrible job of keeping my feelings a secret tonight, apparently."

"What is it? You can talk to me."

"I know." Harry smiled and leaned in for a quick kiss. "That's one of the things I love about you. I feel comfortable talking to you, opening up to you."

When Harry offered nothing more, Louis ventured, "Is it Niall?" There was flash in Harry's eyes that was gone in a second, but it was enough. "It hit you hard that he has a kid, didn't it?"

"I'm not discussing it with you, Louis."

"I know you can't, but... Harry, it's okay to be in shock. It's a big deal. And a big step."

"I just wasn't expecting it. It seems like I say that a lot about Niall." Harry immediately regretted the words, shutting down once they were out. "Look, I don't want to talk about him. Or Liam. I'm almost out of time with you for the night and what I'd love more than anything is for you to just... "

He couldn't finish it, but Louis knew what he needed. "Make you forget," he said softly, seeing the relief in Harry's eyes right before they kissed and Harry's hands came up to roughly pull him closer until Louis was on his lap. The awkwardness disappeared and it was the two of them alone, losing themselves in each other as the passion took over to leave them breathless and wanting.

"I get the feeling sex with you would be incredible," Harry murmured against Louis' lips.

"Hope we get the chance to find out," Louis replied in a whisper, sensing Harry was trying to pull himself together and that their time was almost over. "I never thought I could feel this way about you. It would be easier if I didn't."

"Don't fight your feelings, Louis. If you do, you'll never be happy. Let yourself be happy for a change, take what you want and don't let anything stop you."

"I usually do go after what I want."

"Do you usually get it?" Harry asked with a smirk.

"Always."

"Fuck, that's hot." Blowing out a breath, Harry pushed Louis off his lap. "Get back there, let me cool down before I talk to Niall."

"Good luck with that," Louis teased. "You're pretty damn hot right about now."

"Shut up and go send him over here. But give me a few minutes."

Laughing, Louis made his way back to the table where he'd left Niall.

"I take it that went well."

Louis shrugged, not wanting to brag. "We definitely have great chemistry."

"Yeah, I saw enough of that last week, thank you very much. At least this time you guys were hidden."

Louis sat back in his chair, stretching out his legs. "You're up next."

"I am?" Niall was immediately tense.

"You are. He asked me to send you over. Just around the pool, there's a bench."

"Oh shit. Okay." Wiping his palms on his pants, Niall asked, "How did he seem? Did he give any clues at all?"

"I know he took it hard. I got that much out of him. Sort of."

"Right." Inhaling a deep breath before letting it out, Niall said, "So. Give it to me. Is he sending me home tomorrow night?"

"I don't honestly know, Niall. I hope not. He didn't freak out completely earlier."

"No, but he's good at hiding his feelings."

"Not from me, he isn't. I knew right away something was on his mind tonight. It really is heavy on his mind, Niall. I think you were probably right up there with me as a contender, and this hit him hard."

The use of the word "were" didn't slip past Niall. He sighed again, wondering if he should just give up now.

"Don't even think about it. We made a deal."

"You don't even know what I was thinking."

"Yes, I do. Go over there and talk to him. See what he has to say."

"Fine." Resigning himself to the worst, Niall slid his hands into the pockets of his pants and followed Louis' directions, coming upon Harry staring up at the sky. "Hey," he said softly.

Harry jumped. "Jesus, you're so quiet all the time. Why don't I ever hear you coming?"

"You learn to be quiet when you have a kid. The last thing you want is to wake them up from a nap or be up all night." Niall tried for a smile, relieved when Harry met it with one of his own.

Harry stood up and gestured for Niall to sit, and once he did Harry sat back down. As usual, they kept their distance, and after a few moments of silence Harry stood up again, restless.

"I'm sorry," Niall tried, figuring he'd better meet this head on.

Harry shook his head, hands finding their way into his pockets as he turned to face Niall. "When were you gonna tell me?"

"I didn't know how. I kept trying to find the right moment."

"How about the night we met? Or even in the cabin when you told me about your wife?"

Niall's fingers fidgeted with his pants after he dropped his gaze. "I know. I should have. I just didn't know how and... "

"It's a big deal, alright? Getting involved with a man who has a child is a big deal."

"I know that." Niall stood up. "I'm sorry I didn't tell you sooner. I can't change it now. If you're not ready for something like this I completely understand and-"

"And there you go again, assuming things about me. What is it with you guys? Liam with the fish, Louis with the prejudice before he even got to know me, and now you with this? Are you so ready to believe I'm a horrible person?"

"Not wanting to raise a child doesn't make you a horrible person, Harry. It's not for everyone."

"Who says I don't want to?"

"So you do?"

"It doesn't matter. What matters is that you never even considered I might be open to it. You've already decided how this is going to end and resigned yourself to going home. Don't argue that, I see it in your eyes." Pacing around the small area, Harry's hands came out of his pockets but stayed fisted, and Niall knew he was containing a level of anger none of them had witnessed before. "Do you know that out of everyone here, Ryan is the only guy who hasn't made any assumptions about me or acted like he can predict my every move? Don't ever assume anything about me, Niall, because that shit will get you sent home faster than even ten kids would."

Stunned, Niall stared up at Harry with wide eyes. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "If you brought me over here to teach me a lesson-"

"I brought you over here for a completely different reason," Harry interrupted in a low voice. Niall's eyes caught a glimpse of crimson before Harry's right hand disappeared into his pocket; his stomach dropped when he realized it was the rose, and that Harry had been intending to give it to him. "But that doesn't matter now. Just know that I had no intention of sending you home just because you have a kid. If you think I'm that selfish, then you really don't know me."

Feeling as if he'd ruined it anyway, Niall let go. "It wouldn't make you selfish, Harry! It's not an insult! Not everybody's meant to be a parent! And if you're so worried about people making assumptions about you, maybe you should tell us how you feel once in a while!"

"You know I can't do that, Niall!"

"Find a way! You don't have to say it out loud to get a thought across! We seem to communicate better without words anyway! I'm a genius, I'll figure it out!"

Suddenly Louis was there, Niall felt it without even turning around, and he realized everyone must have heard their raised voices. "I'm fine," he spit out through clenched teeth, unsurprised when Louis laid a hand on his shoulder anyway. It had been years since Niall was so angry, Barbara's death the last thing he could remember driving him to this point where he was shaking and upset. It made little sense considering he was the one in the wrong, but something about Harry stripped away his logic.

Harry glared at them both before calling out, "Max! Over here!"

Summarily dismissed, Louis pulled Niall away. He turned back before they went into the hotel, catching sight of Harry laughing with Max before pulling the rose out of his pocket, and managed to keep the tears at bay until the elevator door closed behind them. Then he collapsed into Louis, who held him tight and let him cry.

* * *

Rather than return to the main suite, Louis led Niall straight to their room. He'd expected Liam to be hanging out with the other guys and was surprised to instead find him snuggled up in bed playing a hand-held video game. Liam sat up immediately with a smile that died when he caught sight of Niall, and his game dropped to the blanket forgotten. "What happened?"

Without answering Louis pushed Niall into the bathroom, instructing him to get into the shower. "Don't worry about it, I'll grab you some clothes. Just get in there and let it out." He closed the door and leaned back against it, letting out a sigh as his eyes fell closed.

"Louis, what's wrong?"

"Hang on." Waiting until he heard water beating on the tiles, Louis stepped away and said, "He told Harry about Nola."

"Oh shit."

"Yeah. I didn't think it was that bad, but they got into a fight and now I don't know what's going to happen."

"Harry and Niall got into a fight?"

Louis nodded.

"About what? Was he mad that Niall didn't tell him sooner?"

"I don't know, maybe. All I heard was Harry yelling 'I can't do that' and Niall saying 'Figure it out.' Or something like that."

"Damn. Is he okay?"

"No. Find him some clothes?"

They got Niall's suitcase onto the bed and dug through it, pulling out a t-shirt and boxers. Louis came across a tiny framed picture of a smiling brunette woman holding a baby and all the air left his lungs as he realized how terrifying it must be for Niall to open himself up to love again.

"Is that Barbara?"

"I think so," Louis replied. "I can't imagine how hard this must be for him."

"Yeah. He's probably really lonely. It's different for us, we never had that with someone, you know?"

"Well... I had someone special."

"You did? Something serious?" When Louis' face threatened to shut down, Liam pounced. "Oh no no no, tell me. Were you married?"

"No. Never married. We couldn't even tell anyone we were together at the time."

"Oh my god. You had a secret lover?"

"It sounds so cheesy when you say it like that," Louis chuckled, falling back onto his bed. "I had a boyfriend, I guess you'd call it, for three years."

"No way. That's longer than I've even kept an employee. Well, except Steve."

Having no idea who Steve was, Louis responded, "I'll tell you about it sometime. Right now I'm concerned for Niall."

"So what happened when Niall told him about Nola?"

"He seemed to take it fine. I mean, he was shocked. _Really_ shocked. But then he asked about her. It wasn't until tonight that I realized how much it bothered him."

"You were there?"

"Yeah, Niall's horse got injured so the three of us walked back to town together. It was nice, Harry told us a little about himself. Did you know he loves horses?"

"Really? No." Liam settled himself next to Louis on the bed, crossing his legs to sit facing the headboard while Louis scooted over to make room. "What else did he say?"

"Um... that he lives in L.A. with his best friend. That he's getting tired of the modeling life."

"Yeah?"

"Mm-hm. He also jumped down my throat for assuming he was a dick before meeting him."

"See?" Liam smacked Louis on the chest. "I kept telling you to give him a chance."

When Liam went to move his hand away Louis kept it there, settling his own over it lightly. Feeling Louis' heartbeat speed up under his palm, Liam stared down at him in silence for a long moment.

"Louis!"

They both jumped, Liam standing while Louis rolled off the bed and grabbed Niall's clothes. He opened the bathroom door and passed them in to Niall, who thanked him.

"Are you better?"

"Yes."

"Good." The door closed again but Louis didn't move, his heart still racing.

"So you didn't get the rose?" Liam asked from behind him.

"Uh, no. I don't know who did." Louis stepped back suddenly as the bathroom door was flung open and Niall stormed past him, apparently having dressed in record time.

"Max did."

"Max?" Liam exclaimed. "That guy? That guy's a douche."

"What are you doing?" Louis questioned, watching Niall move his dirty clothes from a hamper into his suitcase.

"I'm leaving."

"No, you're not."

"Louis, let me go."

"No. We had a deal."

"The deal's off. I fucked up, and he's sending me home tomorrow night anyway." Continuing to pack up stray belongings, Niall kept his back to them.

"You don't know that."

"I do." He spun around finally. "I was going to get that rose tonight. He had it ready to give me and then I fucked up and he gave it to Max instead."

"All because you have a kid?" Liam asked.

"No. But as long as we're on the subject, Liam, I hear you got his opinion on kids yesterday. It might've been nice to get a little heads up, a little insight on his feelings before I went into this today."

Cheeks coloring, Liam dropped his gaze.

"What was that about, huh? You trying to feel him out, see how much better your chances were?"

"Niall, I-"

Louis stepped in front of Liam. "Back off, Niall. Don't start attacking Liam because you're hurt."

"Why the hell would he do that and not mention it?"

"I'm sure he had his reasons and that they weren't meant to harm you in any way."

Shoving Louis out of his path, Liam said, "I was curious, okay? I'm sorry. Yeah, I wanted to know how good your chances were. It was before we really started talking, before I knew I had a chance with him. You don't know how hard it is to go up against the two of you in a competition, you're both gorgeous and funny and smart and I'm just... me."

"Liam," Niall sighed, "You're more than you think you are."

"I know that now. Harry made me feel like I was. But he hadn't at that point and I was scared. I'm sorry, I needed to know if you stood a chance with him."

"Then why didn't you tell me what you found out?"

"Because I didn't find out anything! I couldn't get an answer out of him. If I'd known it was going to end up like this, I would've said something. I promise! I don't want you to leave, man! You guys are like the best friends I've ever had and I don't want to lose either of you!"

"Jesus, come here." Louis pulled them both into a hug, Liam clinging tight and Niall finally relaxing. "Niall, if it wasn't about Nola, then what did you two fight about?"

"We fought about me assuming he'd send me home. And he mentioned you two as well, so you guys need to watch yourselves, too."

"In what way?" Louis stepped back with a frown.

"He was pissed because I never considered that he might be okay with me having a kid. And he said something about Liam with a fish and you being prejudiced before meeting him."

Liam's eyes widened. "He told you about the fish?"

"No, I have no idea what the fish is about."

"I do," Louis supplied. "I guess he couldn't bring himself to kill the fish he caught and was embarrassed about it."

"Wow," Liam marveled. "You really do get people to tell you anything."

"Not really, he assumed you would have told us."

"See? So he's assuming things, too."

"That's not the point," Niall argued. "It doesn't matter what _he_ does, what matters is that when we assume he's going to behave a certain way or expect him to have certain opinions, we piss him off. Royally. He said Ryan's the only one who hasn't done that to him yet."

Frustrated sounds from both Liam and Louis were the response. "Damn Ryan, I hate that guy!" Liam exclaimed.

"I thought you liked him," Niall commented in surprise.

"Yeah, but I hate him _because_ I like him. He's probably gonna win this thing because we're all too busy assuming Harry is gonna pick us," Liam complained.

"Or send us home," Niall added.

"Okay, status report." Louis sat down on his bed, Liam joining him but then scooting away some. Niall lowered himself to his own bed and then Louis spoke again. "Other than me having that original prejudice, I'm still in good with Harry. Today went well. Liam?"

"I haven't seen him since yesterday and we were great. A lot of kissing on the way back, and I got a few kisses at the door, too. Plus I have a rose."

"True. You're not going anywhere. Honestly, I'm not going anywhere either, at least not this week."

When Liam and Louis turned their attention to Niall, he shrugged. "I'm going home. I'm pretty sure, guys. And this isn't just me putting myself down, I know he wanted me until this whole thing blew up tonight. I was still good even after telling him about Nola, but I didn't know that and messed it up and when we left the party, he was pissed. Louis, you have to admit that."

Louis nodded reluctantly. "He was angry at you."

"And that's why I want to leave. Because I think there's a good chance he's going to send me home tomorrow night, and if that's the case I might as well leave now. It's better than being humiliated in front of all the other guys."

"You do realize if you leave you have to say goodbye to him, right?" Louis asked. "You can't just walk out, they make you talk to him."

"Oh. Right. Well... that's fine. I can go talk to him, I'm pretty sure he's not going to stop me. And that way he can focus on the ones who are left, make his decision better tomorrow."

"How many are being eliminated tomorrow anyway?"

"Three," Louis said in response to Liam. "Three of us are going home."

"But not you, and not Liam."

"No, we're good."

Nodding, Niall stood up and started tossing things into his suitcase again.

"Don't go," Liam begged. "Please. You don't know he's sending you home, and if you go to him now because you think he is, then you're proving him right; you're showing him that you predict what he's gonna do. You were so sure before and you were wrong. Maybe you're wrong this time, too."

"Liam, you didn't hear him down there. You didn't see his eyes. Whatever he felt for me is gone."

"But you thought that once before, too," Louis reasoned. "Give him a chance to cool off. I saw the kiss you two shared today. There was something there, so much so that it killed me to watch."

"You saw them kiss?" Liam said in a hushed voice.

"It was intense, Liam. Harry definitely has serious feelings for Niall."

"He _did_ ," Niall argued. "I don't think he does now."

"See how he acts tomorrow night at the rose ceremony. Remember, we have that little party before and I'm sure he'll talk to you, probably apologize for yelling. You know how he is with you, he feels bad and makes it better."

"He did that _once_ , Louis."

"Maybe he'll do it again. But you won't know if you leave now." When Niall still looked unconvinced, Louis added, "I know you miss Nola. I know there's a part of you that's dying to get on a plane right now and run home to her, to the safety and familiarity of what you've built. But if there's a chance that one day Harry Styles can be part of that family waiting for you at home, isn't that worth hanging around one more night?"

"Please, Niall," Liam said again. "Stay. Do it for me if nothing else."

"You? Why do you need me?"

"Because. You're my friend. You stayed with me when I was scared to ski. You make me feel like I'm cool enough to hang out with a genius. I don't meet many of those, you know."

Rolling his eyes, Niall said, "You're cool enough to hang with a genius, okay? A hot soccer player, too."

Louis beamed. "Thank you, Niall. You're pretty hot yourself."

"Haven't we already been through this?" Niall giggled.

"Yeah, what about me? I'm hot too, right?"

Louis shoved Liam off the bed, laughing as he fell onto the floor. "How many times do I have to tell you you're gorgeous before you believe it?"

"I think I've only heard it once. Say it again."

"Go to bed." Louis kicked Liam lightly before sobering and returning his focus to Niall. "Stay. Please. Save me from this guy."

"I hate you guys." Niall moved his suitcase onto the floor and climbed into bed.

"Which means he loves us," Liam clarified.

"And that he's staying." After helping Liam up from the floor, Louis flipped off the light switch, not even caring that he was still dressed. "Goodnight, guys," he called out as he slid under the covers.

From his left Liam said the same, and when Niall was silent Louis tried again. "Goodnight, Niall. Four more weeks. You can do this."

Niall seriously doubted it would be more than twenty-four hours, but he answered them with a goodnight of his own and closed his eyes. The last thing he saw every night before dropping off to sleep was a vision of Nola in her bed, her Spongebob nightlight casting a yellow glow over her tiny face as she slept peacefully. Tonight there was an addition to that vision, a tall brunette bent over to kiss her cheek before pulling the covers up higher, then smiling up at Niall.

"She's beautiful," Harry would say and then take his hand, leading him to their own room.

Tears stained Niall's cheeks as he silently yelled at his brain for giving him that scene to play in his mind. As a genius, he knew the probability of that vision ever coming to life was too small to even fathom; his heart, however, held on to the hope that even geniuses could be wrong sometimes.

* * *

Having nothing to do the following day, the guys distracted themselves with games, food, and the pool.

Liam challenged Louis to a video game in the main suite, but Louis showed off impressive skills that left Liam in awe. "Dude, since when do you kick ass at video games?"

"I have little sisters, remember? That was our favorite way to decide who got stuck cleaning up the kitchen after dinner."

Both kept Niall within eyesight, still fearful he'd take off, but their worries were unfounded; he couldn't leave while Harry was off on a date with Scott anyway, and he was content to spend the time playing cards with Ryan while the other two battled it out in front of the massive television.

Late in the afternoon the men were all discussing that it was about time to go pack and prepare for the ceremony when a man entered the suite and then left with Scott's luggage. Shocked silence hovered over the room, everyone gaping at each other. They all knew a one-on-one date meant it could be over in a flash, but this was solid proof that if Harry didn't see a future with you, he wouldn't hesitate to send you home.

"Oh my god," Peter finally whispered. "Scott."

Knowing that Peter had been closest to Scott, Louis went over to him and squeezed his shoulder. "I'm sorry, man."

Liam joined them, sitting on Peter's other side while Louis stood above. He didn't say anything, just offered his presence, and Louis knew that for him it was difficult to keep his silence when he probably had so many things he wanted to say.

"So does this mean he's only eliminating two tonight?"

No one had to ask who Jerry was referring to. "Yes," Niall answered. "Scott took the place of one."

The mood was somber as the group dispersed, heading back to their rooms to pack and prepare for the rose ceremony. Liam didn't bother to gather his belongings, knowing he would have time after the party, and instead spent most of his time aiding the other two in looking irresistible. Niall took a few minutes to call Nola and that calmed him down a bit, forcing him to focus on what was waiting for him at home should he be sent home tonight.

Harry of course gave no hint as to what had gone wrong with Scott, greeting the group with smiles and hugs as he mingled and then took men away for private time. He seemed to spend a much longer time with Ryan than he had anyone else, which worried everyone since he'd been seeming to focus more on those he hadn't spent any time alone with.

Louis, Niall, and Liam staked out a little corner table like the one they'd "owned" in L.A., knowing Harry would find them if he chose to and making small talk to pass the time. They were giggling over something Louis had said when Liam suddenly blurted out, "Niall! Oh my god, I just realized! He didn't hug you!"

Niall had of course noticed that, and it was obvious Louis had as well when he chastised Liam. "Dude, he already feels bad enough about it. Thanks for bringing it up."

"It's fine," Niall commented, squeezing Louis' hand once before returning it to his lap. "Other than the fact that I'll miss you guys like crazy, it's almost a relief to know I'm going home. Every time I talk to Nola I miss her more."

"You don't know that, Niall. Just because he didn't even look at you-"

"Liam! Stop! Jesus, remind me to never let you cheer me up." Louis shook his head, feeling bad when Liam looked guilty. He laid a hand over Liam's, adding, "It's okay. We know you're trying to help."

A shadow fell over them and they all glanced up to see Harry's gaze focused on their clasped hands. Louis pulled his away almost guiltily before Harry said, "Liam. A few moments?"

"Of course!"

They watched Harry lead him away after making a point of holding Liam's hand tight as if to claim his territory.

"Wow," Niall remarked. "He wasn't kidding. He does not like to share. Good luck dealing with his insane jealousy once this is over."

"Like you wouldn't give anything to deal with that 'hardship.'"

Niall offered a wan smile before standing up to grab another beer.

* * *

"God, I missed you," was the first thing out of Harry's mouth once they were alone, and after that there wasn't a whole lot of talking. Liam had missed Harry, too, and needed the reassurance that Harry still wanted him. Harry left him with no doubt, the two panting when they finally pulled apart.

Liam couldn't stop smiling, Harry chuckling before saying, "Hi. Should we try a normal conversation now?"

"I guess, now that we got the good stuff out of the way. Hi, Harry. How are you?"

"Not too bad, thanks. Much better after a few minutes alone with you."

Beaming, Liam joked, "You should make that happen more often, then."

"So demanding." Harry let out a sigh and sat down on the bench, pulling Liam down onto his lap.

"I relax you. You let things go when I'm with you."

"Somewhat. You have a way of getting me to loosen up."

"It's a gift. One you should keep around to open whenever you need it."

"Hush, you're not going anywhere tonight. You don't need to plead your case." Harry hugged Liam to him, kissing his neck and threading his fingers through Liam's short locks.

"God, Harry, I'd better get a sex date out of you. You're driving me crazy."

"Just be quiet and kiss me."

Liam was more than happy to oblige until the sound of a throat clearing interrupted them. He pulled back and bit his lip to keep from yelling at whoever had forced his way into their moment, turning to see Peter standing there.

"Guys, I'm sorry, but I really needed to talk to Harry before the ceremony."

Hopping off of Harry's lap, Liam managed a smile. "It's cool. See you later, Harry."

"Bye, Liam. What's up, Peter?"

Liam left them to it, returning to his buddies at the small table.

"How'd it go?" Louis asked.

"Great, until Peter showed up. We were having such a nice make-out session, too."

As usual, Niall couldn't find it in him to resent Liam. Instead he chuckled and said, "Poor baby. You'll get your chance next time, I'm sure."

"I hope so. He seems pretty tense tonight."

"Really?" Louis commented with a raised eyebrow.

"Yeah. Said I always help him loosen up."

"I'm sure that whatever he's decided about Niall, it's hard. He really cares about you, you know."

"I know," Niall answered quietly, eyes on his beer bottle. "But that's not enough in a situation like this. What matters is the long run, who he can see himself happy with in ten years. He definitely wants to settle down, even if he's only hinted at it so far. I wish you both the best of luck."

They smiled and clinked bottles, Peter suddenly there. "Louis, he's asking for you."

"Damn, that was fast!" Liam exclaimed. "Everything okay?"

"Yeah," Peter nodded. "I just... screwed up with him earlier and needed to fix it if I could. Before it was too late, you know?"

They all did know. Louis left with Peter and Liam said, "You know, maybe you should try to fix it. It's not too late, Niall. Just talk to him, like Peter did."

"At this point anything I say is only going to make it worse. He's made up his mind, Liam. I can apologize, but I can't take back what I said or did."

"So you're ready to just give up? Be one of those that doesn't even get walked out to the limo, just let him dismiss you without a word?"

"I'll have a quick moment to say goodbye. And I will apologize and wish him the best of luck. He deserves to be happy."

"Why are you so stubborn?"

"It's not stubborn, it's accepting what fate has in store for you. If Harry isn't the one for me and Nola, then someone else is. Better to move on and find him than prolong the inevitable."

"Whatever, man. I just know I wouldn't give up that easily."

Niall smiled, reaching up to hold Liam's hand briefly. "And that's one of the reasons I like you so much."

* * *

Louis approached with a sense of déjà vu, the scene feeling like a repeat of the previous night—Harry waiting near the same bench, him going into it unsure of what Harry was thinking. He hadn't missed the way Harry glared at him the night before when he came to Niall's rescue, though he'd kept his fears to himself; Niall wasn't the only one on slippery ground, he thought.

"You uh... wanted me?"

Harry spun around, hands in pockets as he faced Louis. "Hey."

"Hi."

There was the dreaded silence following, Louis' heart thundering as it drew out. Harry was searching for words, and Louis found he suddenly didn't want to hear them. It was no wonder Niall was ready to run rather than face this.

"I'm not discussing Niall," Harry finally stated.

"I'm not asking you to."

"What happens between him and me stays between us."

"He's my friend."

"He was my possible future husband. I'd say that gives me more right to him than it does you."

_He was. Oh shit, Harry, no. Don't send him home._ Louis' face fell as he blinked back tears at the prospect of losing Niall. "I take care of my friends," Louis said slowly, fighting to control his emotions.

"I understand that, and I admire it, but you need to remember why you came here in the first place."

"I came here to find love."

"With _me_ , Louis. With _me_."

"You're jealous of Niall? You think this is easy for any of us, having to watch you fall for other guys? What right do you have to be jealous of anyone?"

"You're assuming things again. I'm getting really fucking fed up with that."

"You know what? You want to send me home? Fine. Do it."

Harry swallowed, gaze intense as he asked, "Is that really what you want, Louis? You're done with me already?"

"Harry... fuck. No, of course not. Come here." When he pulled Harry into his arms, Harry didn't fight it, sinking into the embrace. "Why does it seem like we're always fighting anymore? We have something special and I don't want to lose that."

"I don't either," Harry whispered, and now his arms slid around Louis to cling tight. "I'm not used to this, feelings these things. I don't know how to handle it."

"Just relax," Louis murmured into Harry's ear. "Don't take it all so seriously." He trailed his lips down Harry's neck, feeling Harry fall against him in surrender. "However it works out is how it's meant to be. Either one of us with you or you with someone else, as long as we're happy that's what matters."

"I don't know what I want, and it scares me."

"I know." Louis leaned away to run a thumb over Harry's lips, then kissed them softly. "I'm not going anywhere unless you make me. If you ever need to talk, or just to be held in silence for a while, I'm here. I can be your friend too, you know."

Harry took a deep, steadying breath before standing up straight. "Thank you. It helps knowing that there's someone here who can be that for me, a person to lean on."

"I'll be whatever you need me to be. As much as I don't want to admit it, I'm pretty far gone on you already. Whatever you need, Harry."

Harry kissed him then, not hungry or desperate but as if savoring it. "It's almost time for the ceremony. I'll see you in there."

"I'll be there." Louis offered Harry a smile. "But can we stop fighting? It's such a waste of the short time we do have together."

"Deal," Harry grinned. "From now on, we spend all our time kissing. Or... whatever I need."

"Exactly." Louis lifted Harry's hand and kissed it, Harry melting as he had the first night they were alone. "Do what you have to do tonight, and I'll be waiting for you when we hit the next town. If you keep me tonight, that is."

"Go on," was all Harry said, and Louis did.

He was torn between hope regarding Harry and sadness for what he now knew was to be his last moments with Niall. Stepping up to the table at which his two new best friends were seated, he held out his arms. "Guys, tonight could change everything. I've never felt so uncertain as I do going into this, and I just want to tell you both how incredible you are and that I'm richer for knowing you. Promise me, swear it, that when this is over we can still be friends."

"Aww." Liam shot up out of his chair, hugging Louis tight. "If you guys both leave I'm going to be so lonely. I need you guys!"

"You'll be okay," Niall soothed, standing up to be included in the embrace. "Everyone likes you, just continue being yourself. It's going to be fine. And when this is all over, I expect a phone call from you both. We'll find a way to get together for a weekend somewhere, without all the pressure and competition, and we can just be normal friends."

No one mentioned that by that time one of them might belong to Harry, but it wasn't necessary.

"Promise that," Liam begged. "No matter what happens, we'll still have each other."

"I promise," Niall said. "You can come ride horses with Nola and me."

"That would be awesome! And I can cook you guys hot dogs!"

They all laughed, hugging each other tight.

Chris' voice rang out across the suite, calling them all together and instructing them to a large patio area where the ceremony had been set up.

"This is it," Liam commented, squeezing each hand before following the group.

"I'm going, aren't I?" Niall asked Louis, who couldn't bring himself to answer. All he could do was keep Niall at his side as they moved out to the patio, both of them near tears but taking comfort in the slight touches they allowed themselves to give.

* * *

Liam stood next to Max off to the side, looking somehow vulnerable and proud all at the same time. Louis caught his eye and winked, Liam beaming in response, and Louis realized once again that he hated being away from his buddies. He was glad Niall was next to him, at least, because Niall would need him more tonight, but he absolutely hated that in a few short minutes Niall would be out of his life, at least until this ordeal was over and done with. And if he did end up winning, would Harry even want him to keep in touch with Niall?

_It doesn't matter. If he can't handle my two best friends in my life, then he's not the one for me._

Chris greeted everyone and reminded them that Liam and Max were here to stay, and that since Scott had already been sent home that meant only two men would be eliminated at the ceremony. Niall's hand immediately found Louis' at the words, Louis giving it a squeeze before dropping it as Harry entered the room.

They waited for Harry to address them but he instead stopped Chris from leaving, explaining that he needed a moment to clear something up before beginning the ceremony. Fear shot through the men, all of them wondering if they'd done something wrong, but it was Niall the green eyes settled on.

"Niall, can I have a word with you before we do this?"

"Uh... sure."

The group parted to make room for Niall to squeeze through, and he followed Harry back into the hotel with his heart galloping. Harry led him to a small room off the main hall and closed the door, gathering his thoughts before spinning to face Niall with hands in his pockets; Niall knew by now this was what Harry did when he was nervous or uncomfortable. "I know how much you must miss Nola, and how hard that must make it for you in addition to the pressure everyone else is feeling. I understand now why there's a part of you that's ready to jump ship every five minutes, I get that she must be pulling you in that direction."

Niall only nodded, hands clasped in front of his waist.

"I have to send two people home tonight. What I need to know is, do you want to go home?"

Conflicted, Niall didn't know how to answer. He raised his eyes to meet Harry's stare and knew in that moment that he didn't; what he wanted was to have that gaze smiling on him as it had a few times before, hear Harry's laugh so carefree the way it had been when they were racing each other down a mountain. "No," he whispered, feeling sick to his stomach as it clenched.

"No? Are you sure?"

"Do you want me to?"

"No," Harry replied with a shake of his head.

"I miss her. So much more than I can begin to tell you. And I feel like a horrible father for wanting to stay longer, but... I do. I want to stay."

"Okay," Harry said softly. "That's all I needed to know."

They stared at each other for a while, unsure how to continue, until Niall said, "I am sorry. For keeping it from you. I was scared."

"I know. I told you once that I was keeping an open mind and you need to believe that, believe everything I tell you. Because I don't lie. And when I say that I want you to stay, I say it because it's true."

"Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah."

"Good. Remember what you said to me the night we met? You asked if you could go back to the limo and start over?"

Niall chuckled. "You remember that?"

"I remember every moment with you. That's what I'm asking now. Can we start over, with no secrets between us, and try to make this thing work?"

"I'd... really like that."

"Good," Harry said again, a slow smile spreading over his face. "We need to get back in there."

"Yeah."

"Can I... "

Niall had been moving toward the door when Harry's unfinished question stopped him. "A kiss?" Niall asked.

"Actually, no," Harry laughed. "But it's not a bad idea. Well, wait, it is; we may never leave this room if I kiss you. But I wondered if you had a picture of her. That you wouldn't mind showing me."

Niall blinked, heart once again racing. "Of course." With shaking fingers he lifted his wallet out of his back pocket, opening it to his favorite picture of Nola. "This is her on her fifth birthday, we took her to the stables so she could ride." He felt Harry step up behind him, his breath catching when arms slid around his waist and Harry's chin rested on his shoulder.

"I love her little hat," Harry said with a smile.

"It was her birthday, of course she had to have a party hat."

"It's quite fashionable. And is that... your wife?"

Niall's gaze shifted to the picture in the next compartment, one of himself and Barbara on their wedding day. "Yes. Her name was Barbara."

"She's beautiful, Niall. I see where Nola gets those big green eyes."

Tears crowded in, Niall's heart yearning for something he would never have again.

"You look so happy. None of the weight I see in your eyes now."

"I was happy. I loved her very much. I always will, Harry."

The quaver in Niall's voice had Harry spinning him around, holding him tight. "That's okay. I would expect no less of you."

"You need to understand that. You might be the one I'm meant to be with, but you'll never replace her. Nobody will."

"Yeah. I know."

Harry said nothing else, and Niall knew how intimidating that must be for him. He only hoped Harry was willing to take that step anyway.

* * *

When Niall returned with red eyes, Liam and Louis exchanged a worried glance. Harry apologized for keeping the group waiting, and Chris once again left the room so he could begin.

The first name called was Louis, and even through his concern for Niall, Louis was relieved beyond measure. Harry gave him a bright smile before asking, "Louis, will you accept this rose?"

"Yes." His smile was just as huge as Harry pinned the rose to his shirt, and then he moved back into position.

A few more names were called, Louis wanting so badly to ask Niall what had been said but he knew now wasn't the time; he also knew that there wouldn't _be_ time after, that Niall would be whisked away and unable to contact him for at least a month. A panic set in, Louis wondering how these two had affected him so deeply that he couldn't stand the thought of living without them in his life, not even for a month.

Somewhere in the middle Niall's name was announced, both Liam's and Louis' mouths dropping. Niall released the breath he'd been holding, then approached Harry at the front of the room.

"Niall. Please accept this rose."

"I will," Niall nodded, the two smiling at each other.

"Thank you."

"Thank _you_."

His rose in place, Niall returned to stand next to Louis, who appeared more relieved than even Niall felt. Glancing to the left, Niall saw a similar expression on Liam's face. He grinned at Liam and then at Louis, his heart lighter than it had been since stepping off the plane in L.A. a few weeks before. It was good to have friends like these.

Louis' mental tally now put it at nine down, sixteen to go.


	11. Chapter 11

Their next flight took them to San Francisco. Having been there before, Louis' reception to the news was lukewarm, but Liam couldn't contain his excitement. "It's like... the gay capitol of the world!"

"Actually, the city is known for far more than that, Liam," Niall pointed out. "It's a major hub of the banking and finance world."

"You know what I mean," was Liam's response; he was unwilling to allow anything to bring him down, secure for the first time in the knowledge that he was a top contender for Harry's heart.

When he mentioned this once (or five times) Louis brought up the point that none of them really knew how Harry acted around the other contestants and that truly they couldn't possibly know where they stood in relation to the group. Liam argued that he could "just tell" by the way Harry looked at everybody, and reiterated that along with Niall and Louis, he had a damn good chance. "Harry doesn't look at anyone else the way he does us."

"Except Ryan," Niall said quietly from the window seat on his right. He'd expected Liam to put up a fight for it, but Liam seemed content to sit between him and Louis. "If anyone has a chance at squeezing us out, it's that guy."

Three pairs of eyes swung to their left, where Ryan was chatting with Mike while Peter hovered over from the seat in front of them. Mike laughed at something Ryan said, Peter grinning as well, and Liam sighed. "Man. He's so cool. And you can't hate him, he's so nice. Friendly with everyone."

"Kind of like you," Louis said, turning his head to the right to smile at Liam. "But I still think you're more fun."

"And we know Harry likes to have fun."

"Lucky for you," Niall smirked, "or your ass would've been sent home ages ago."

Liam frowned and tilted his head to study Niall. "You're different. Ever since the rose ceremony, you're more... "

"What?"

"I don't know. You're more relaxed. You smile more. You even laugh at my stupid jokes now. Before, Louis was the only one who did."

"Not true," Louis countered. "Most of the other guys did, too. And didn't Harry?"

"He hasn't heard a lot of them. Yet."

"Well," Niall suggested, "make sure he hears them from now on, that way he'll send you home soon. One less guy to knock down."

"Niall, shut up!" Liam exclaimed. "I liked the quiet, shy version of you better."

Both Niall and Louis laughed, Louis saying, "I think the difference is that now he knows he's got a shot. Right, Niall?"

"That, and the fact that I'm not hiding anything from Harry anymore. It feels good."

"And the truth shall set you free," Liam quipped.

Niall nodded. "Or at least keep you around one more week."

"Think you'll get a one-on-one date this time?" Liam asked.

Biting his lip, Niall shrugged.

"He will," Louis assured them. "I bet Harry can't wait to get you alone. The way he kissed you? He's probably dying for it."

"Then why haven't I gotten one yet? Even Scott got one, and nobody liked him. Except Peter, I suppose."

"You know what I think?" Liam began, "I think he took Scott out on purpose so he could send him home. He knew it wasn't gonna work."

"He could've just sent him home at a ceremony," Louis argued. "Why would he pass up a whole day with someone he liked just for that?"

"I've seen other Bachelors do that," Niall stated. "It's kind of like a last-chance thing, he wants to give it one last try before taking that drastic step. The only way he'll know for sure if there's something there is to get the guy alone and spend real time with him."

Louis and Liam pondered that for moment before Liam asked, "But with me and Louis, it's the opposite, right? He felt a connection and wanted to... explore it?"

"I would assume so. He definitely likes you guys."

"Then why haven't _you_ had a one-on-one date yet?"

"That's what I'm saying."

"Don't worry," Louis soothed, reaching across Liam to pat Niall's knee. "You'll get it this time. Liam and I will sit in the hotel and mope together about how he's totally falling in love with you. Maybe we can find some ice cream, dude."

"Can it be rocky road?" Liam asked in a wistful tone.

"As long as I get chocolate, I'm good with whatever else is thrown in."

Niall grinned at them, suppressing an eye roll.

"So... " Liam began hesitantly.

"What?" Niall pressed.

"Are you ever gonna tell us what happened at the ceremony? When Harry took you away? Because I gotta tell you, dude, I really thought you were going home that night."

One corner of Niall's mouth curved up. "Yeah. I did, too."

"He was." They both turned to stare at Louis, who continued, "When we were alone he said something to that effect. He was planning to send you home, Niall."

Niall was silent, absorbing that.

"So what did he say?" Liam tried again.

"He asked me if I wanted to go home."

"And you said... ?" Louis urged.

"I realized then that I didn't. That no matter how much I miss Nola, I need to see this through. Because he's worth it. So I said no, I didn't want to go, and asked him if he wanted me to go."

"Dude, you _asked_ him that?"

"Yes," Niall chuckled, amused by Liam's wide eyes. "If he doesn't want me here, there's no sense in staying."

"And?" Louis pressed.

"And he said no. That he wants me to stay. And I apologized again for keeping it from him for so long, and we... he saw a picture of her. She was real to him then." When neither of them commented, Niall said, "And he asked me to stay anyway. So if he sends me home without a one-on-one date this week, I'm going to be pissed."

Liam nodded. "No kidding."

"Don't give up on him, Niall. Let him get used to the idea."

Niall sighed at Louis' words, closing his eyes and leaning his head back against the seat. His brain turned to Harry again and he prayed for time alone with the man who had come to captivate his dreams.

* * *

But when the next date card came, it had Peter's name on it. Niall tried not to let it bother him, spending the day exploring the hotel with his buddies, and they returned in the afternoon in time for the next date card to arrive.

Peter was still on his date, which left twelve other men gathered in the main suite with them. Liam snatched the envelope up, excited. "Okay, this one's for all the marbles. Well, not really, it's just a group date."

"You're such a dork," Louis giggled. "Just read the card!"

"Okay, okay!" Clearing his throat, Liam began to read. "'Let me amuse you. Mike, Louis, Jeff, Dave... and Liam!'" The last word was of course screamed out in joy, Liam fist-pumping the air again.

Louis raised an eyebrow at Niall, knowing this could be good or bad. Not getting a date now meant that he might get a one-on-one the following day. It was between him and nine other men, but one of them was Ryan. Would Ryan get a second one-on-one before Niall even got his first? He closed his eyes for a moment and told himself to trust Harry. He had to put faith in the fact that Harry wouldn't have kept him here for no reason, that Harry understood how difficult it was to be away from Nola and wouldn't put him through that unless there was a chance for something between them.

"Amuse you... so we're gonna laugh a lot?" Liam asked.

"Maybe it's a comedy club," Niall responded. "That fits in with what I've seen in the past. Maybe you guys get to practice your stand-up. Oh hey, the quicker to get rid of you, dude," he teased. "Tell him your jokes."

"Niall, I swear to God, you're gonna get punched before this week is over."

With a laugh Niall hugged Liam to him. "You know I don't mean it. Going through this without you would be torture."

Louis smiled at them, Niall giving him one in return over Liam's shoulder. He saw it in Louis' eyes, the encouragement to believe in Harry, and he nodded.

But if he didn't get a date this week, he and Harry were going to have a long talk before the rose ceremony. There was only so much a heart could take.

* * *

Peter didn't return after his date with Harry. Once again the pressure seemed to double as their numbers dwindled and their chances increased by one. The dates were fun, but there was always a fear of it ending badly.

The following day a van took them to their location, Louis and Liam sitting in the very back and discussing the shops as they passed. Liam mourned the fact that they weren't given any real time to see the sights in the cities they visited, and Louis suggested that when it was all over, maybe the three of them could plan a trip to San Francisco. Liam replied, "You mean the four of us. Because one of us will be with Harry."

There was a lot implied in that statement, and Louis wasn't willing to consider any of it in that moment. A whoop from Liam called him out of his thoughts. "Look! I see a Ferris wheel! And a roller coaster! Dude, it's an amusement park!"

"Of course," Louis chuckled. "'Let me amuse you.'"

It was more of a large carnival than an actual park, but it felt a bit like Disneyland to Louis. The park was closed to everyone but the five of them and Harry, who met them at the entrance along with the ever-present cameras. Everyone received warm hugs, Harry looking relaxed and ready for a day of fun—and of course gorgeous, but that was a given.

"Okay, here's the deal, guys. First and foremost, I want this to be a fun day. I know everyone wants a turn with me, but for the most part I'm keeping this a group thing. Just pretend we're all buddies hanging out at an amusement park, going on all the rides together and having a good time. I'll rotate who I ride with, and of course there will be moments I take you each of you off alone as well. We have the whole place to ourselves, and everything's free. Let's have some fun."

Jeff and Dave took the hands Harry held out, and talk turned to what they should ride first. It was discovered that Dave had a fear of roller coasters, but Harry managed to talk him into it with the promise he'd sit next to Dave and hold his hand. Liam started to roll his eyes, but Louis reminded him that he too had needed extra attention from Harry and was given it without hesitation, and Liam sighed.

"Yeah, you're right. I guess he's a nice guy. That's... a good thing."

"A very good thing. And let's be honest here," Louis whispered, leaning in. "Do you really think Harry is going to end up with a guy who's afraid of roller coasters?"

That got Liam laughing, Louis reaching out a hand for his out of habit before dropping it. The last thing he wanted was to give Harry a reason to be jealous again.

Other than the few turns each of them got to ride with Harry, Louis and Liam stuck together throughout the morning as Liam and Niall had on their shared group date, and as Niall and Louis had on theirs. Because it was a situation that required them all to hang together, though, it was more of a group feel than pairs, and nobody really felt left out for once.

They stopped for lunch around one, everyone branching out to try different stands and Louis impressed the place had staffed it fully even though it was only the six of them running around. He figured the show's production had more to do with that than the carnival itself, having put out plenty of money to make this possible, but it wasn't his concern.

Liam started giggling when Harry spit out the bite of hot dog he'd taken then said, "Dude, that happens every time!"

"This is gross! You've ruined me, Liam! I can't eat this crap!"

"I forgot to warn you about that. Once you've tasted my dogs, nothing else compares. Look, you've got the mustard thing going on again." He leaned across the table with a napkin, wiping at Harry's mouth, and the two grinned at each other as they remembered their previous date. Suddenly Liam was desperate to be alone with Harry.

Harry, however, seemed content to chat with everyone while eating his food (though not touching the remains of his hot dog), and it wasn't until they were all complaining of overfull bellies that he stood up. "I need to walk this off. Join me, Liam?"

Beaming, Liam hopped up and slipped his hand into Harry's. "What are we doing?"

"Anything but a roller coaster, I'd probably puke right now."

"I saw some spinning cups on the other side of the midway... "

"Stop, I'm about to lose it. How about I win you something?"

"Yeah? Like what, a teddy bear?"

"We'll figure something out."

Harry spent about twenty minutes with him, the two of them competing at carnival games with Harry being the victor, but Liam didn't complain because he ended up with two stuffed animals and an inflated toy in the shape of a dog. "I feel bad I didn't win you anything, though."

"How about you kiss me for a while and we call it even?"

Liam smiled. "I can live with that."

Harry pulled him behind a stand and kissed him deeply, relief pouring through Liam as he felt the same attraction in Harry that had been there before; it was always good to know Harry's feelings hadn't changed. "This still sucks, having to share you."

"I know. Just remember moments like this, and know that I miss you."

"I keep doing that, but it's... hard. Seeing you with the other guys... it hurts."

Harry nodded, hugging Liam close to him. "I invite you on these dates because even a little time with you is better than nothing. Remember that, okay? I can't include you in everything, it wouldn't be fair, but you're still the most fun person I've ever known. That hasn't changed, Liam."

"And you still love kissing me?"

"More than ever."

They shared a grin before kissing again, Harry allowing it for another few minutes before stepping back. "Okay, time to share me again."

"My least favorite part of the day."

Harry laughed before dragging Liam away and leading him back to the group. He took Dave next, and Louis scooted over for Liam to join him. "So, I see you have some new toys."

"Look! I got a cheetah and a monkey! Oh, and this dog. I think I'll name him Arnold."

"Arnold?"

"Yeah, like the guy from 'Happy Days.' All my dogs have 'Happy Days' names."

"Are you kidding me?"

"Nope. Chachi, Richie, Fonzie, Potsie, and Ralph."

"That's... very you."

"Thanks! So now we have Arnold, too. Or I could make it a girl and name it Joanie. What do you think, does this look like a girl or what?"

Louis leaned back as Liam shoved the toy in his face. "I think you're silly, that's what," he laughed.

"Yeah, but besides that. Is it a girl?"

"Sure, whatever. Just don't sleep with it, I don't want to wake up with a heart attack when it pops in the middle of the night."

"Do _you_ want to sleep with her? I'd let you."

"No, I'm good, thanks. Did he kiss you?"

The subject change threw Liam for a second. "Yeah. And he said some nice things. He makes me feel... good, you know?"

"Yeah. I know."

When it was Louis' time he smiled at Harry and allowed him to lead, content to go where Harry chose. He hated that their time was short and gave voice to his feelings as they climbed onto the Ferris wheel.

"I know you have to be fair and all, but when can I have a second date with you?" Louis moved in to cuddle up to Harry, who raised a hand to stop him.

Eyes suddenly serious, Harry said, "I need to talk to you about something."

The ride started moving, lifting them high into the air, and Louis' body went cold. Whatever it was, Harry wasn't happy about it. "What's wrong?"

They got to the top and Harry called down for the operator to stop the ride, leaving them suspended in midair.

"You have to trap me for us to talk?"

"No, but we're away from everyone and you can't walk away from me. I want to know about Niall."

Louis blinked, his heart dropping into his stomach. "I thought we weren't discussing Niall. You refuse to."

"Louis, I need to know what I'm getting myself into. If the two of you would be happier together than with me, then this is the time to-"

"Wait, what? You think he and I... Harry." Rubbing his face, Louis said, "We're just friends."

"But do you want to be more? Because if you do, that's fine, I just need to know now so that you two can start your life together."

"What life? We're both here for you, not for each other."

"You two are very close and-"

"No. I promise. We're just friends and we have no interest in each other that way."

"Are you sure that's mutual?"

"What do you mean?"

Harry looked away before answering. "He looks up to you. I can see that much. And he's always laughing and smiling around you and-"

"Because he's comfortable around me. He trusts me somehow to take care of him but I swear, that's all it is."

"And you don't want anything more?"

"No! Where is this coming from?"

"I spent an entire day with you two, watched you around each other. When he and I got into an argument, you were suddenly right there to make sure he was okay."

"Because I'm his friend."

Harry continued as if Louis hadn't spoken. "I need to know for sure because if you really would rather be with him than me, I have to send you home. Both of you."

"Harry. Please." Louis wanted to pull his hair out, but he took a deep breath and squeezed Harry's arm. "Look at me. When I kiss you... how to explain it? Remember the night you first kissed me? How much I wanted to hate you?"

Harry nodded slowly.

"I couldn't. I tried. What I feel for you is romantic, it's sexual, it's exciting. With Niall... he's wonderful. A great guy, an incredible friend. But that's all. I couldn't resist you then, and I can't resist you now. That hasn't changed, either."

"Promise?" Harry asked in a tiny voice.

"Yes," Louis answered softly. "Can I tell you about my last boyfriend? Not the dates I've had here and there, but my last serious boyfriend?"

"If you feel the need to." Harry didn't look as if he particularly wanted to hear it, though.

"His name is Michael Chandler."

The reaction was immediate and exactly what Louis had expected it to be. Harry's mouth dropped, his eyes widened, and he looked like he was going to hyperventilate. "That guy? You fucked that guy? Oh my god, he's so hot!"

"Of course you get hung up on the fucking aspect," Louis chuckled. "We went through our first few years in the MLS together. Became best friends, and eventually more."

"I never heard anything about that. What happened?"

"We were on the same farm team for a long time, and then I advanced to the official team."

"L.A. Galaxy?"

"Yeah. He ended up getting traded to a different team-"

"Philadelphia Union, that's where he started."

"Right. So you follow the hot soccer guys, is that it?"

Harry rolled his eyes. "I follow the really good soccer guys. But if they're hot, that helps, too," he grinned.

"Sure. So we decided to let it go because of the distance, it got harder every day and we were both lonely so we said goodbye. But for three years, he was my partner in every sense of the word."

"I didn't even know he was gay."

"Did you know I was?"

"I'd heard rumors, but you can't trust what you read in magazines. I know that better than anyone. Do you still love him?"

"There's always going to be a small piece of my heart that belongs to him, but... " Shrugging, Louis said, "We moved on. And I've grown a lot since leaving him, being alone has shown me what I really want in a man."

"And he wasn't it?"

"He... sometimes he was. For example, our date? That's exactly the sort of thing he would've done for me. The romantic dinner. And the game. Though he never combined the two into one date," Louis smiled. "That was a lot to take in at once."

"It worked, though." Harry's grin widened.

"Hell yeah, it did. And that's my point. You knew what I needed without me having to ask. I really had no choice but to fall for you."

Harry went quiet then, letting it all digest. Louis held his silence, looking at the park from above and seeing rides they hadn't yet visited, practically bouncing in his seat when he spied a merry-go-round. As childish as it seemed, he knew Liam would want to ride it.

"What are you smiling about?"

"There's a merry-go-round."

"This excites you, I take it?"

"Can we ride it, Harry?"

"As a group, I suppose. Though the guys will probably find it silly."

"Liam won't."

"True," Harry laughed. "Okay, let's do it for Liam." Motioning for the operator to get them moving again, Harry laid an arm over Louis' shoulder and pulled him close.

"So do you feel better now? You know I'm not going to run away with Niall?"

"Shut up."

"Are you blushing?"

"Shut up, Louis."

"You are! Ha! Did I get you blushing before Liam? I think this is significant."

"Who says I didn't blush for Liam?"

"I'm sure I would've heard about it. Or did you blush over the fish?"

"Can we stop talking about the fish?"

"Maybe if you kiss me... "

Harry did, their tongues happy to make contact again as the wheel went around and around. Finally he motioned for the ride to stop, and as they walked back toward the group Harry held his hand. "It was important to me to let you know that if you two honestly want to be together, I won't stand in your way. Because if that's the case, obviously I'm not the one for you. I'd hate to marry you and watch you pine over some other guy for the rest of your life."

"That's not gonna happen, Harry. It's you I want, okay?"

"Okay." Harry smiled, hugging Louis to him as they walked, and when they arrived, he let go reluctantly to take one of the other guys away.

Liam immediately pulled Louis down to a table. "Okay, what happened?" he hissed.

"What, you're gonna grill me? I didn't grill you."

"Yes, you did. You asked if we kissed."

"Oh. I guess I did. Yes, we kissed."

"I know that much, we could see you on the Ferris wheel. But you were up there talking for a long time first. What'd he say?"

"Liam... "

"Come on. We agreed, open books. And I don't want to get yelled at again, so I'm telling you guys everything. I expect the same from you."

After glancing around, Louis stood up. "Walk with me to the restroom."

Liam left his new friends in the care of Mike, who swore to protect them with his life. When they were far enough away, Louis said, "He thought I had a thing for Niall."

Liam's momentum stopped. "Niall?"

"Yeah. Come on, keep moving. He thought Niall and I were in love."

"Oh. Wow." After a few moments, Liam asked hesitantly, "And... are you?"

"What?" Now Louis stopped, causing Liam to halt this time. "No! Why does everybody think that?"

"Because you guys are so close. I mean, I never really thought it was true, but I can see how other people do."

"Then why would you ask me that?"

"Hey, you never know. Did you tell him it's not true, that it's him you want?"

"Of course. He's better now. But damn, he's got a jealous streak."

"I've never understood jealousy."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah! Like... what good does it do? All it does is make you fight and see things that aren't there and you spend more time wondering about stuff that isn't happening than noticing what's right in front of you. My sister's husband is like that, he gets jealous all the time. Has to call and check up on her. It's stupid. If someone's going to cheat on you, let them. You're better off without them anyway."

Louis studied Liam, impressed. "I never thought of it that way."

"Why, are you a jealous guy?"

"I... have had instances of jealousy," he hedged.

"Oh, that means yes. Seriously, dude, it's not worth it. All you do is make yourself sick and make your boyfriend resent you."

"What if you're both jealous? Doesn't that even it out?"

"I don't know, I guess it could. But the thing with jealousy is, you're more worried for yourself than the other person. Because it's rooted in fear. You're afraid to be alone or that someone's going to leave you. And it ruins the good stuff you do have."

"Liam... " Shaking his head, Louis started walking again.

"What?"

"Nothing, I just... you continually surprise me."

"Is that good?"

"I guess. But I have a surprise for you later, so that makes _us_ even."

"A surprise? For me?"

"Yep. You can thank me later."

"What is it?"

"Not telling. You'll see."

"Louis! You're killing me!"

"I know, and it's so much fun."

Liam punched him in the arm, the two of them laughing as they entered the restroom.

An hour later Louis watched his face light up at the sight of the merry-go-round, though Liam held it inside, not wanting the guys to laugh at him. When Harry steered the group toward the stationary horses, he could hold it in no more. "We're going on this? For real?"

Harry shared a wink with Louis before answering. "Only if you ride with me."

"Of course!" Liam hopped up onto it, ignoring the groans from the other guys. "Come on, we can sit on this bench-y thing. Oh, but I kind of want the black horse."

"Take the black horse," Harry laughed. He reached out to pull Louis onto the platform. "You can share the uh... bench-y thing with me." Louis slid onto it, dragging Harry in next to him and hugging him close while Harry called out, "We're riding this thing with or without you guys! Get on so we can do this."

The other three hopped on, Liam climbing onto a large black steed while carefully holding his prizes.

"Isn't he adorable?" Harry whispered, eyes on Liam.

"Yes," Louis answered with a smile. "He's like no one I've ever met."

* * *

Dave received the rose for that date, Louis assumed for having overcome his fears. He liked that about Harry, that he didn't necessarily give it to his favorites but to those who needed it most for various reasons. Of course the previous group date had been an exception, but Harry had fully intended to give the rose to Niall in order to show he wasn't outcast for being a father; Niall himself had ruined that.

They returned to the hotel to find Niall playing fifa with Ryan, and Louis felt a moment's jealousy before laughing at himself. Maybe this was what Harry had been talking about, but it wasn't anything romantic on his part. True, he found Niall sexy and thought he'd make a wonderful boyfriend, but the spark wasn't there between them—not in that sense, anyway. He didn't find himself daydreaming about Niall or thinking back on things Niall had said. He cared for Niall, wanted to make sure Niall was taken care of, but in that sense it was more of a brotherly love, and he assumed it was the same for Niall.

" _You guys need to quit assuming things about me."_

They were Harry's words, but could they apply to Niall as well? Suddenly Louis wasn't sure, and what if Harry had seen something he hadn't? What if Niall's feelings for him were more than brotherly? They had certainly flirted a bit in the first few days of meeting.

Louis stepped up behind Liam, who was showing off his toys, and waited for him to finish speaking. "Liam, can you take over for Niall? I need to talk to him."

"Sure! I kick ass at fifa. Let me just go put away Joanie and the guys."

"I got it, Liam. Let me take them to the room." Louis took the stuffed toys from Liam and waited for Niall to stand before heading out of the suite.

"Kick his ass for me, Liam!" Niall called back. "He kept beating me, and nobody beats me at fifa."

"Sore loser!" Ryan yelled with a laugh.

"What's going on?" Niall asked when they were in the hallway.

"I need to talk to you. Harry brought up something today that got me thinking, and... well, open the door."

Niall did, Louis entering and dropping the toys on Liam's bed. Unsure how to approach this, he finally just spun around and asked, "Are you in love with me?"

Niall's eyes bugged out, his mouth opening and closing a few times before he sat on his bed. "Um... no. Are you... "

"No. But Harry thought we were, thought he saw something between us, and that's why he was so jealous. Are you sure?"

"Yes! Positive. I mean, you're a great guy, and I'm sure you'd be an amazing boyfriend, probably husband as well, but Harry is what I want, he's so much more than I could ever have imagined I'd have a chance at and-"

"Okay. I get it. I just had to make sure, because he said we acted like it. Or something like that."

Niall sighed. "He thinks I'm in love with you? You told him I wasn't, right?"

"Well, I could only speak for myself, but I didn't think you were so I told him we're just friends and that's all we want. It is, right?"

"Yes! Why do you keep asking, is there something you want to tell me?"

"No! I feel the same way, you're an incredible guy and probably an amazing father but I don't feel for you what I feel for Harry. And I sure as hell don't want a kid right now. No offense."

"None taken," Niall chuckled, pulling Louis down next to him. "So he really thought that? Damn. If I'd know that I would've done things to show him that's not the case."

"Like what? Thrown yourself at him?"

"I don't know, maybe," Niall snickered. "Can you see me doing that? It would be a disaster. I can't pull it off like Liam."

"Well, then you just have to make sure he knows how you feel tomorrow. On your date."

"My date." Niall let out a "pfft" sound. "I'm not even getting my hopes up anymore."

"Yes you are, don't lie." Louis nudged Niall. "It's gonna happen. He likes you."

"I still think he's afraid of me. More than ever now, because it's not just me he's dating. It's my family."

"You have to trust him. He's had time to think it over, and he did ask you to stay. Even knowing about Nola. Do you trust him, Niall?"

Looking down at his lap, Niall shrugged. "It's hard. I barely know him."

"Do you know enough, though?"

When Niall remembered the feel of Harry's lips on his, of Harry's arms around him and the sound of his voice when he'd asked about Nola in that little room, the look in his eyes when he'd presented Niall with a rose and said "Please take this rose"... Niall nodded. "I do."

"Then don't worry about the rest. It's going to happen. And maybe when it does, when you spend more time alone with him, you'll realize he's not the guy for you. I'm not saying that'll be the case, I'm just saying it's a possibility. You might even be the one to leave because you're not feeling it. And in that case, I will allow you to leave."

"Gee, thanks, Louis," Niall joked.

"I'm just saying. Anything's possible."

"Guys!"

It was muffled, but it was Liam, who sounded excited as he yelled through the door. "Where's my key? Damn, did I lose it on the rides? Guys, open up!" This was followed by pounding, and Louis finally stood to open the door.

"What?" he asked with an indulgent smile. Truly, Liam was like no other.

"Niall! Come on, the date card came! We haven't opened it, I made them wait for you, but come on! This could be it!"

Niall's heartbeat tripled, his stomach feeling nauseous. If he didn't get this date, he was going to seriously think about going home. And if he did... 

"Come on!" Louis dragged him out of the room, the two of them following Liam back to the main suite, and his palms were clammy as they settled onto a couch. Louis grabbed his hand, holding it tight, before Dave opened the envelope and began to read.

"'Surprise me... Niall.'"

There were whoops on either side of him and sighs from the other men who'd been hoping for a date, but all Niall really heard over the sound of his own heartbeat were the words in Harry's voice.

" _Surprise me."_


	12. Chapter 12

Niall was in and out of sleep all night. At times he was able to relax and tell himself that it would work out either way. If Harry sent him home after the date, he could return to his angel; if he was kept longer, all the better. Other times he was so nervous he could hardly stand it, tossing and turning and sighing loudly.

It was this that proved to him how badly he did want Harry for himself. He'd been able to distance himself for the most part, not allowing himself to believe he'd actually have a chance, and now that he had what was a very good chance he was terrified to lose it. Was this what Louis and Liam felt before each date? A night of sleepless torture?

 _Wait. They never found out the day before. Everyone else got their date card on the day of the actual date. At least the one-on-one dates did_.

Was that significant? Did it mean he was somehow different than everyone else? And if so, was it good or bad?

_You're going to drive yourself crazy, Niall. What will be will be. Either he loves you or he doesn't. Whatever happens, you still have the most beautiful daughter in the world, and that's really all you need._

After that he slept peacefully, Nola's sweet face in his dreams, and when her eyes looked up into laughing green ones, Niall's lips curved into a smile.

* * *

Liam and Louis helped him prepare for the date, but again-as Niall had no idea where they were going (and even less of a hint than ever before)-they could only do so much. Liam suggested they take the clue literally and try to shock Harry by giving Niall a mohawk; both Louis and Niall smacked him.

They went with jeans and a button-down shirt, packing swim trunks and a tie just in case, and his hair was styled in the newer spiky look they'd given him a few weeks prior.

Sensing that Niall was nervous, Louis pulled him aside as they made their way to the main suite. "Just remember, if it doesn't work out it's for the best."

"I know."

Liam hugged him, patting his back and stating, "If you don't come back, I'll kick his ass."

"You will not. But I appreciate the sentiment. And I find it interesting that I'm the only one we've really feared that happening to."

"Well, you _are_ the only guy to piss him off so far," Liam reasons. "We've never seen him fight with anybody else."

"That doesn't mean it hasn't happened, Liam. Just that in my case there were others nearby."

"Right, that's what I'm saying. He lost it with you in front of everyone else. That's bad."

"Or good," Louis interjected.

"Explain how that would be good," Niall urged.

"It means you affect him deeply enough for him to lose it."

"So you've never argued with him?"

"I didn't say that. I only said it means he must actually care a great deal if he got that angry. You know how he is, if you don't matter to him, he doesn't care. Like the guys he was sleeping with-he didn't care if they slept with anyone else. You matter, so you get a reaction out of him."

"Yeah, but that can backfire, too. If I piss him off badly enough, he might _over_ react and send me home."

"I never said it was easy," Louis shrugged.

They all hugged again and said their goodbyes in case it ended poorly, promising to get in touch as soon as possible.

"You look great," Liam assured Niall as they entered the suite.

Louis agreed, even Ryan whistling when Niall stepped into the room, and then they sat down to wait.

It wasn't even two minutes later when Harry entered the large room, full of smiles for everyone but not meeting Niall's eyes just yet. After he'd said a quick hello to the others, he turned his attention to Niall. "Hi there."

"Hey."

"You look great."

As Niall blushed, Liam blurted out, "See, Niall? I told you. I told him that, Harry."

Louis pulled Liam back against him with one arm, using the other to place a hand over his mouth. "Really need to get a muzzle for this guy."

Harry laughed, though, winking at Liam before slipping his hand into Niall's and moving toward the door. "Bye, guys."

"Bye!"

Harry opened the door, gesturing for Niall to go first, and then followed. The awkward silence fell again and Liam leaned back into Louis. "Do you think he'll come back?" he whispered.

"I really don't know. As long as he doesn't do anything stupid like think he's not good enough or assume he knows what Harry is thinking, he'll be fine."

"Yeah," Liam sighed. "He's screwed. Want to go swimming?"

"Why not? But if you try to drown me again, I won't save you when the guys keep shoving you in the pool for saying stupid shit."

"Yes, you will. You love me."

Louis rolled his eyes, dragging Liam along with an arm around his neck. "Come on, let's change."

Liam was unnaturally quiet as they donned swim gear, prompting Louis to ask what was wrong.

"How do you know anything is?"

"Because I know you. You're too quiet, there's something on your mind."

Liam sat down on his bed with a sigh, reaching for the stuffed monkey and pulling it into his lap. "I'm just feeling a lot of things and I'm kind of confused about what I want and I don't know how to handle it all. I've never really put myself all into a relationship like I have this one."

"With Harry?"

"Yeah. Even with my boyfriend it wasn't like this. I had the business and it was more important to me than my boyfriend. That's not right, is it?"

Louis took a seat next to Liam on the bed, hugging him close with one arm. "I think it just means you hadn't met the right guy yet. When you do, that won't be a problem. I'm not saying you have to give up the business, but maybe you can find a guy who has his own thing going and is busy like you, and you just meet up when you can."

"Harry would be like that." Liam relaxed against Louis, leaning into him.

Nodding, Louis said, "Yes, I suppose he would."

"But I miss it. I mean, when I was able to spend time with my boyfriend, it was awesome to have someone to go home to. To relax, watch some T.V., have some great sex, and then sleep with him all night. God, I miss that."

"I miss it, too," Louis offered softly. "I lived with my boyfriend and we were part of the same team, so we were together constantly. And it actually worked, we never got tired of each other or fought too much."

"This would be your secret lover?" Liam pressed with a grin.

"Yes," Louis laughed. "We were together for three years and then we went to different teams. It was for the best, it wasn't going to work with us only seeing each other when our teams played against each other, but I still miss that. Having someone to... well, everything you said. Relax with, sleep with. I miss sex more than I thought I would."

"Especially right now, when we're around all these hot guys and can't do anything about it."

"Exactly. But when I leave here, if it's not with Harry then I'm right back where I was. Alone. My career is pretty much everything to me, but one day that will end. And what will I have then?"

"Two really awesome friends."

Louis' mouth slid into a smile. "You're right. At least I'll have you guys." Liam seemed to shut down again suddenly and Louis squeezed his arm. "What now? Talk to me."

Reluctantly Liam admitted, "I feel guilty. Because there's a part of me that wants their date to not go well. But at the same time, I don't want Niall to leave! This sucks!"

"Don't feel guilty about that, it's natural."

"So you feel the same way?"

"I... don't let myself think that way. I will say that I'm jealous, of Niall and of you and anybody who gets along well with Harry. Watching the two of them kiss was like having my guts ripped out."

"Pretty intense, huh?"

"It was the first time I realized I might not have this. Like... I knew that, mentally, knew it could change at any time and he'd find someone he likes more. I even told him that on our first date. But seeing it, knowing he's feeling things for Niall that he felt for me... that's hard. And I haven't seen the two of you together much, at least not alone, but I imagine it's the same—when you two kiss, sparks fly."

Liam nodded. "They do. I like kissing Harry, he makes me feel special."

"Did your boyfriend not?"

"I don't know, he did, but... you know, the truth is I don't even know why he dated me. We had nothing in common, he complained about my dogs, and sometimes he'd tease me for being like a kid."

"Even I do that, Liam," Louis joked, his hand tightening on Liam's shoulder.

"Yeah, but when you do it... I don't get the feeling you're actually annoyed. You just like to tease me."

"True. I _love_ to tease you. But you bring it on yourself with your constant bragging."

Laughing, Liam said, "You know I don't believe half the shit I say, right?"

"Yes," Louis chuckled. "If you did, it would just be arrogance. Instead, it's... adorable."

Liam smiled up at Louis, whose fingers caressed his shoulder gently. "I'm glad I ended up rooming with you guys. I never imagined I'd come out of this with friends."

"I didn't either. The first night we were all together, I was happy to sit in a corner and stay out of everyone's way. Instead you bulldozed your way into my life," he teased.

"Niall did first! When I came over, you two were sitting together."

"Yeah, I made him come sit with me. He looked lost. Now I know why."

"Louis, do you really think when it comes down to it Harry would go for a guy with a kid?"

"I honestly don't know, Liam. You talked to him about it more than I did."

"He never really gave me an answer."

"I think the fact that Niall's still here is an answer in itself."

"Yeah," Liam sighed. "We've got stiff competition, buddy. A genius."

"A sexy one at that."

"And yet we're still here."

"We are."

Liam tossed the monkey up onto his pillow. "Race you to the pool!" He jumped up and was gone, the door open before Louis truly realized what was going on.

Rolling his eyes, Louis grabbed them a few towels and sunscreen, and was almost out the door before he went back for the monkey. If Liam got out of hand, the monkey was going down.

* * *

Hands clasped, Harry and Niall rode down the elevator in near silence. He didn't think he'd ever been this nervous, and the lack of conversation was making it worse. What the hell was Harry thinking?

Niall glanced up as the elevator settled onto the main floor, and Harry met his gaze with a smile. He leaned down to press a quick kiss to Niall's lips, Niall's stomach fluttering even from that simple touch, and then led Niall to a plush couch in the lobby, where there was of course a cameraman waiting.

"Sit with me?"

"Sure." He did, dropping the backpack on the floor before lowering himself next to Harry but keeping some distance between them, though Harry's grip on his hand remained tight.

"Okay, Niall, this is how today works. There is a limo outside waiting to take us wherever you want to go. There's also a plane and a helicopter on standby in case you choose someplace not too close. The only rule is we have to be back tonight and we can't leave the country. So today is your day. Tell me where you want to go."

Stunned for a moment, Niall couldn't speak. Harry smiled wider, rubbing his thumb over the back of Niall's hand, and said, "Take your time. We've got all day."

"You... we're going wherever I say?"

"As long as it's within those guidelines, yes. I'm at your mercy."

"Wow. Okay, um... wow. Give me a minute." Niall's mind immediately went to Nola, and of course the one place he would go if he could choose (and technically he could) was right back home to her, if even for a few hours. That would be against the rules, though; he was supposed to have no contact (outside of the few minutes each night on the phone) with family or friends until the hometown date, should he make it that far.

"Anywhere but there," Harry said quietly, reading his thoughts. "I'm sorry, if I could take you there I would."

"I know," Niall smiled. "Thank you."

They stared at each other, Niall wondering what Harry was thinking yet again, but then Harry leaned in for another kiss and conscious thought disappeared. His lips were soft and warm, his tongue not demanding but gentle, and a calm settled over Niall as Harry pulled back.

"Better?"

"Than what?" Niall asked with a chuckle.

"You looked nervous. I don't want you to be nervous with me."

"It's kind of hard not to. I really want this to work."

A slow smile answered Niall's words, Harry's hand squeezing his briefly. "Where are we going today?"

"Gosh, um... this is going to sound so boring to you, I'm sure, but... "

"Anywhere, Niall. Whatever you want. Museum? Some weird medical thing? I'm there."

Niall giggled, smacking Harry's arm lightly with his free hand. "Don't make fun of me."

"I'm not! I was totally serious, whatever you want."

"What I want... and I hope it's okay... is just to spend some time at the beach. I haven't been since I was a kid."

"The beach? Really?" Harry's face lit up. "I love the beach!"

"Yeah, but it's probably boring to you, you get to go all the time."

"Not nearly as much as I'd like to. I'm so busy, there's never time to just... sit at the beach. I love to surf, too."

"You want to do that? We can surf. You'd have to teach me, though."

"We'll see. Mostly I just want to... " Harry trailed off, biting his lip.

"What?"

"It doesn't matter what we do, Niall. I just want to spend time with you."

This time it was Niall who went in for the kiss, and it was sweet with an underlying passion that Niall knew would get out of hand if unleashed. He ended it sooner than either of them wanted to, grabbing the backpack and standing. "Let's hit the beach."

"In that case, we don't even need a car, it's about two blocks away. Unless you want to ride, we can totally do that."

"No, let's walk. See some of the city."

"Whatever you want. I'll call to let them know we won't need transportation for now. Can I take that for you?"

Niall glanced down at the pack on his shoulder and smirked. "I can handle it, I'm a lot stronger than I look."

"I know, I just... wanted to do something nice. You're not used to that, are you? Someone else taking care of you?"

"Not at all. Barbara used to sometimes, but I'm more the caretaker than she was. I was the one always looking out for her."

"Let someone else take care of you for a few hours." Harry hefted the pack onto his own shoulder as they started walking. "Is there even anything in here?"

"Not much. I wasn't sure what to expect so I packed swim trunks and a tie."

Harry laughed. "That's perfect! Maybe tonight we can have a dinner that requires a tie."

"Or maybe we can just make out on the beach instead."

Harry stopped walking, eyes wide as if he couldn't believe his ears, and Niall laughed. "Your face... "

"Shut up, don't tease me like that! Damn, get my hopes up just to send them crashing to the ground?"

"Who said I was teasing?"

Harry threw his head back and laughed, taking Niall's hand in his again. "Get over here, you animal. Full of surprises, aren't you?"

"Isn't that what the card said? To surprise you?"

"Yes, I guess it did. Come on, let's go stare out at the ocean for a while."

"Do you need to get anything before we go? In case we go into the water?"

"I'm always prepared." He reached into the light jacket he was wearing and showed Niall a flash of brightly-colored material.

"Is that... did you bring along a those tiny shorts?"

"I didn't know what to expect from you. See? Perfect date." Harry slid a pair of shades over his eyes as they stepped out into the sun, still holding tightly to Niall's hand.

Talk was light as they walked the few blocks to the beach, the two stopping here and there along the way to look in shops. Niall attempted to buy Nola a few little things but both times was shoved aside as Harry whipped out a credit card, and after that Niall stopped picking things out for her. He did allow Harry to buy him a t-shirt, though, a red one to match the one Harry bought for himself. Harry also picked up supplies for an impromptu beach picnic, throwing everything into a cooler that he carried after Niall insisted on taking his pack back.

They found a spot close to the water, Niall glad it wasn't too crowded. He helped Harry set up a blanket and unpack their lunch, Harry tossing back a towel for the cameraman to sit on as well. "Don't worry, we'll share the food, Rich," he grinned.

"You'd better. That chicken looks pretty damn good."

It occurred to Niall then that he'd grown used to having the cameras follow him around over the past few weeks. In the hotels and the mansion much had been captured on stationary cameras, but even on the group dates he'd hardly noticed them there. Harry was obviously aware of them and used to being filmed everywhere he went, and Niall wondered what it would be like to live a life like that—or to date a man who did. It wasn't something he particularly wanted for his daughter.

Thoughts heavy as he stared out over the ocean, Niall jumped slightly when Harry squeezed his shoulder. "Hey. Talk to me."

"It's... nothing, really."

"If it's upsetting you, it's something." After propping his shades on top of his head, Harry once again squeezed his shoulder.

"I'm not upset, I just... I'm thinking about Nola and the life I want for her. I'm... "

"What?"

Harry had a way of staring into his soul with just a look. Niall lowered his eyes. "I don't want to ruin this date."

"If something's on your mind, we should talk about it. We don't get a lot of time to do that, and if we're planning to make a life together we need to be open with each other. If it's not going to work between us, it's better we know that now. Are you worried I'm not the kind of guy you want raising your kid?"

"No! God, no, nothing like that." Reaching out to pull Harry's hand between both of his, Niall said, "It's more... the lifestyle. The cameras and the fame and I don't like the idea of her being in the spotlight so much."

"Right." Harry nodded, eyes once again guarded, and Niall hated that, hated when he hid behind a mask. "I'd do whatever I could to keep her out of it. Both of you, if that's what you want. My private life isn't very private, but that's because I don't try to make it that way. If I wanted to, and with you I would, I could do things in a way that shields you both from the media."

"Well, when all this comes out, she's going to be in the media anyway. I'm not naïve about that, it's one of the things that held me back from doing this sooner."

"The show, you mean?"

"Yes. My mother wanted me to do it for the previous season, but I said no because of Nola. Plus, it was too soon, I think. I wasn't ready to open myself up to someone."

"And now you are?"

Harry's fingers were soothing over his, somehow relaxing Niall as he tried to find words to express his thoughts. "I'm feeling some pretty intense things, and I think if I wasn't ready to open myself up, I wouldn't be."

Harry nodded, taking that in. "I didn't expect to feel so many things myself. I think I thought it would be more fun. The idea of a bunch of men fighting over me amused me."

"That's horrible, Harry."

"I know." Chagrined, Harry hung his head. "But it turns out I was lonely. Meeting people like you, like the other guys here, it made me realize that I need more in my life. I think I've done more talking in the past few weeks than I have in my entire life. _Real_ talking, not just schmoozing it up with the end goal being to fuck someone. It's... " Harry let out a breath, shaking his head. "Weird. But not in a bad way. Just unexpected."

"So you do have a heart," Niall teased.

"Apparently so. Who knew?" They laughed together, Harry freeing his hand to pass Niall a plate. "I mean that, though, Niall. I'll do whatever I can to shield you guys."

"You keep talking about how you're not sure modeling's what you want to do anymore. Is that really something you'd give up?"

"Give up entirely? No. I'd still take jobs. Just not as many, or as far away."

"Would that negatively affect your career, though? Passing up too many jobs? I'm sure it would cut your level of fame down over time, if you're not in the public eye as much. Does that bother you?"

Harry frowned, looking as if he was weighing that over. "Yes, it might kill the fame eventually, but fame... it's not all it's cracked up to be. For a few years it was. It was fun, exciting, everything I'd ever dreamed. Now... I don't know. I spend more time alone, or with Lou. I've actually been hanging out with her when we're at home, when she goes to do family stuff. Her daughter think we're dating," he laughed.

"She doesn'rt know the truth about you?"

"She's a little young for that. We never told her we were dating, she just assumes because I'm with her a lot. And we live together."

"Give me some of that chicken? Oh, and the potato salad. Thanks." After fixing up a plate for himself and then one for Rich, Niall asked, "And how is it for you? With her daughter? Do you get tired of it pretty quickly and want to go home?"

"No, but she's... how to put this? She's not a whiny little brat. I don't know Nola, so I'm not judging her as one of the 'bad' kids, but Lux's dad raises her right so she's a good kid. And so fucking smart, oh my god!"

"Yeah, kids are a lot smarter than most people give them credit for," Niall chuckled. "Nola amazes me every day."

"She makes me feel stupid sometimes. I've never been the brightest guy mentally, I won't lie, but this kid... damn. I was never that smart as a kid."

"You wouldn't feel stupid with Nola. She'd teach you, she loves to teach people things. I've been properly educated on every animal in existence, I think. But don't interrupt her once she gets going. That child will have her say."

"Thanks for the tip," Harry smiled. "Anything else I need to know about her? You know, in case I meet her at some point?"

It was said in an offhand manner, Harry seemingly focused on his potato salad, but Niall knew him well enough by now to sense that Harry wouldn't ask that question if he wasn't planning on putting the knowledge to use later. It made Niall feel better, knowing that Harry intended to keep him around that long. Of course that could change at any time, but in this moment Harry wanted to come home with him and that spoke volumes to Niall.

"She loves animals, which I'm sure you've gathered by now. She also loves me. I'm her hero."

"Of course you are. She's got good taste."

Niall giggled through the bite of chicken he'd just taken, washing it down with soda before continuing. "Let's see... her favorite color is green, her favorite-"

"Mine, too! I love green!"

"Oh? You look amazing in it. It brings out your eyes."

Impressed, Harry said, "I've been told that. I'm surprised you noticed."

"I notice everything. I'm extremely observant."

"Good to know. Now tell me more about Nola."

"Okay, um... she laughs a lot. It's my favorite sound in the world."

Harry blinked, finishing up his bite of food slowly before setting his plate down on the blanket. He leaned forward slightly, elbows on his knees, and urged, "Go on. Tell me more."

The intensity of Harry's gaze took Niall's breath away. It was both intimidating and reassuring at the same time, which made no sense but Niall was past trying to reason his way through emotion; emotion was entirely illogical. "She's in school. Well, daycare, but it's school, too. I haven't enrolled her in regular school yet, though she's smart enough that she could've probably done it two years ago. I just don't have the capability to pick her up until the evenings, so daycare works for now, but really she needs to be in school."

"Your mom works?"

"Yeah. And I know what you're thinking, if I'm in charge of the library I should be able to leave whenever I want to pick her up, but it's not just that. I'd have to bring her back to work with me and I won't do that, to her or to me. It's easier for now to let her stay in a place where she's around other kids and learning, and I know she's taken care of."

"Have you considered hiring someone? A nanny-type thing or even a babysitter?"

"I would if I could afford it. Libraries don't make a lot of money, the revenue comes from the state and county budgets. Seems like every time I turn around budgets are getting cut and I make sure to provide for my employees, so... "

"That doesn't leave a lot for you."

"I get by. I make sure Nola's got what she needs, there just isn't any extra. It's not a bad life, I'm not complaining about it. For the most part, I'm happy. Nola is my happiness."

"But she can't be your everything, Niall. If she was, you wouldn't be here."

Niall looked away, cheeks coloring.

"You get lonely, right? Lie in bed at night wishing there was someone to talk to? Someone to hold you and love you and tell you how amazing you are?"

"I... yeah. Sometimes."

"There's nothing wrong with that. You're allowed to have your own happiness, have someone to love."

"I feel like my entire focus needs to be Nola."

"But if you had someone to share that with, to take some of that burden from you, wouldn't that be easier?"

"And you're ready to take on something like that? To be the other parent that Nola needs?"

"We're not talking about me right now," Harry evaded. "I want you to realize that what you want isn't a bad thing, that you're allowed to be happy."

"I am happy. Nola makes me happy."

"I know that, Niall, but you're lonely, too. Don't tell me you never lay in bed and jack off."

"Harry, Jesus! I'm eating here."

"I'm making a point, Niall. Your child is your world, but your child can't fulfill every one of your needs. You need a man in your life."

"Which is why I'm here, right? We've already covered this. I admit it, I'm lonely and I get horny and there's not a whole lot I can do about it. Life goes on, and you just focus on what you have rather than what you don't. And I have a hell of a lot."

When it had gotten to the point where he was practically yelling at Harry, Niall had no idea. They stared at each other in challenge, their food forgotten, until Harry finally said, "Tell me about Barbara."

"Why?" Niall questioned, still irritated.

"Because I'd like to know, okay? Fuck," Harry muttered suddenly, rubbing his hands over his face. "Just talk to me. Please. Open up to me."

Sighing, Niall said, "She was my best friend. Losing her is the hardest thing I've ever lived through. I loved her and she made me laugh and I still miss her every day."

The mask was back, Harry's eyes shielded as he asked, "What did you love about her?"

"I don't know, everything? She was great with Nola. Way better than me. She had the ability to feel rather than think, and I'm the opposite. She taught me how to not take life so seriously, to laugh at things rather than get upset or angry over them, to understand that I can't control everything. I just... I miss her," he finished lamely, the tears coming from out of nowhere but before he could even acknowledge them he was in Harry's lap, cuddled between long arms and with warm lips at his hair as Harry plucked his plate from his hands and set it aside.

"I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Niall, that you have to live with that pain. It's okay to live again, you have to let yourself. For Nola, too. You don't have to forget about Barbara to move on."

"I know that." The tears threatened to spill, Niall unable to stop them suddenly, and Harry held him tighter, rocking them. Niall's arms came up to wrap around Harry, clinging as he buried his face in Harry's chest. "I'll never forget her."

"I wouldn't expect you to. That's why I want to hear about her, I want to see your face light up the way it does when you talk about her. I'm so fucking jealous of this woman who can make you look like that and—fuck. _Fuck_."

Niall knew exactly what that obscenity was about. That was the type of thing Harry wasn't supposed to say, not to any contestant, because it gave away too much of what he was feeling. Rather than let the moment pass, though, which was probably what Niall should have done, he lifted his face to Harry and asked, "You're jealous of my dead wife?"

Instead of answering with words, Harry expressed his frustration through touch, claiming Niall's mouth in that way that left both of them breathless. Niall shoved Harry onto his back and kissed him passionately as he stretched out over Harry's body before Harry's lips found his neck, sucking hard enough to rip a gasp from Niall as his hands tightened in Harry's hair. Harry seemed to like that because the suction increased, causing Niall to hiss and pull harder, and the cycle continued until Harry flipped Niall onto his back, barely missing his unfinished plate of food, and then Niall's shirt was being unbuttoned and lips were traveling down his chest and it had been so long, _so long_. They needed to stop, they couldn't let this go too far, both because of the show's rules and because they were on a public beach, but Niall was unable to voice that idea because every touch felt so good.

"How are you so amazing?" he whispered, fingers once again in Harry's hair as the lips made their way back up to his, Harry devouring him so that he couldn't have spoken again had he wanted to. When Niall's legs lifted up to wrap around Harry and pull him closer, the groan that left Harry made him shudder, Niall having never heard such a desperate sound from anyone in relation to him. He knew exactly what Harry was feeling, though, like he'd be consumed by the fire spreading inside him, the need for more.

"Anne."

"Fuck," Harry muttered, rolling off of Niall and attempting to calm down.

Confused, Niall sat up and looked back at Rich. "Anne? Did you just say Anne?"

"Inside joke," Rich replied. "It's his mother's name."

Completely lost, Niall rubbed his face. Thoughts were coming slowly at the moment. "I don't get it."

"Don't worry about it," Harry said. "Just... fuck. Okay. Want to go for a walk?"

"Yeah, that's probably a good idea." Niall stood, reaching down to help Harry up, and with Rich in tow they headed down to walk along the water, hands clasped tight again.

"Did you want to change into your trunks first or anything?" Harry asked.

"No, I'll just roll up my jeans in case the water comes up high enough to get us. Oh, and get rid of my shoes."

Harry did the same and then they were holding hands again, in a comfortable silence until Harry suddenly said "You're too far away, get over here." He laid an arm over Niall's shoulders, Niall sliding his around Harry's waist before resting his head on Harry's shoulder as they walked.

"Why do you always turn into an animal when we kiss?" Harry smirked.

"Me? You started that. One second we're talking about Barbara and the next you're on top of me."

"Um, excuse me, I think you pushed me down first. Climbed on me like some kind of horny beast?" Harry teased.

Blushing, Niall hid his face in Harry's shirt.

"I'm not complaining, Niall," Harry laughed. "I'm curious, though, is it just me or are you always like that with a guy?" When Niall mumbled something unintelligible, Harry tilted his face up. "Try that again?"

Niall sighed, his face even more red now. "I said I wouldn't know. You're the first guy I've ever really made out with."

Harry stopped walking in disbelief. "You've never kissed a guy before?"

"I did once, in high school. It wasn't like what we do, though. It was more... a curiosity thing. We kissed for a few minutes."

"And?" Harry pressed. "Were you an animal?"

"I was too nervous to do much of anything. It was my first kiss at all. Barbara was my second."

"Niall, are you kidding me? You've only kissed two people in your life?"

"Three now," Niall grinned, and with an effort he got Harry walking again.

"Wow. I feel... honored."

"You should," Niall joked. "I don't let just anyone maul me."

"But that's my point. Were you an animal with Barbara, too?"

Shrugging, Niall hedged, "I had my moments."

"When you were drunk and actually lost control?"

"Um... no. Usually after... "

"What? You can tell me anything. Of course the entire world might hear it eventually, I suppose, but... "

"I feel like a horrible person about it."

"You could whisper it to me. I won't repeat it."

After thinking it over, Niall halted and lifted up onto his toes to whisper, "It was after I'd see a hot guy. I'd get turned on and attack her."

"Ah." With a grin Harry said, "Well, I'm a _really_ hot guy. Makes sense you're always an animal around me."

"Not conceited or anything, are you?" Niall quipped.

"If it wasn't true, I wouldn't say it." He leaned down to capture Niall's lips again, letting it go on until they had to step away or drag each other down to the sand. "See? That's what I'm talking about. I love that I can do that to you."

"I kind of hate it."

"Don't hate it," Harry whispered. "Embrace it." He kissed Niall again, keeping it slow this time and drawing it out, Niall sinking into it and allowing Harry to hold him up. A rough wave crashed against them, knocking them slightly off balance, and they giggled before setting off again, Niall's head back on Harry's chest.

"So besides Lou, who's important in your life?"

"My mom. I had a bodyguard for a while but he was an ass and never let me greet my fans. I do have those, you know."

"Yeah? Do they approach you on the street and stuff?"

"Occasionally. It's not at the stalker level but it's pretty cool to be recognized."

"Tell me about your mom."

"She's the best. She loves me and supports all of my decisions. She's helped me a lot with my career. I worked with her for a cosmetic company after high school, helped her develop a men's line. And I tested a lot of make-up," he chuckled.

"You... wore make-up?" Niall asked in a hushed voice.

"I still do sometimes, for certain photo shoots and modeling gigs." When Niall was quiet, Harry said, "It's part of the business, Niall. Don't judge me."

"Oh, I'm not judging."

"No?"

"Hell no."

Harry halted again, staring down into Niall's eyes. "Holy shit, that turns you on."

"I... might have a small eyeliner fetish."

"Jesus Christ, I need to get you out to a club. I bet all those guys in make-up would have you attacking me in five seconds. I could wear make-up, too. Want to do that tonight? Get dressed up and go dancing?"

"Stop," Niall whispered, hiding his face in Harry's shoulder. "I'm not quite ready for that yet. And we have to get back before too long."

"Damn. Why did your date have to be the one we end early?"

"You chose it."

"Clearly I wasn't using my head."

They walked on a little further, Harry pointing out a hot air balloon above them. "I've always wanted to do that."

"Me, too. Wonder where they take off from?"

Harry lifted an eyebrow. "Yeah? You want to?"

The sheer joy in Harry's face would've made Niall say yes even if he hadn't wanted to. "Let's do it."

Harry called back to Rich with instructions for him to get in touch with someone to set it up. "You can come, too!"

"It's not like you have a choice!" Rich replied. He shut off the camera long enough to make a phone call, Harry and Niall sitting together in the sand and staring at the water.

"It's so peaceful here. Someday I want to live near a beach."

"So... if I did propose. If in the end this thing worked out for us... would you expect me to move there?"

"No."

"I'm not saying I wouldn't, I just-"

"I've been thinking more and more that when this show airs, I'll need to move anyway."

"No, you won't. Are you worried the people in your town won't accept you? Do they even know you're gay?"

"Only my mom knows that. But yeah, everyone will in a few months. I've got a little money saved up, and a couple of friends I'm pretty sure would help me if I needed it. They've got money. I'd feel awkward asking, but I know they'd do it if I did."

"And they know you're gay?"

Niall laughed, nodding. "Considering I met them here, I'd say so."

"Oh. You mean Louis and Liam."

"Yeah." Harry's silence, as well as the wall coming up again, prompted Niall to ask, "You know we're just friends, right? All of us? There's no reason to be jealous."

"I know you're friends."

"But that's all we are."

"I know, Niall. I'm aware that the three of you have formed a close bond and that it's going to continue when this is all over."

"Does that bother you? The idea that if you choose one of us, you might still have to see the other two?"

"Not in the way you're thinking."

"Then how?"

Rich yelled to them that a car was on its way and would meet them at the pier. "You guys have about twenty minutes to get back and pack up."

"Come on." Harry stood, pulling Niall with him, and they rushed back toward their belongings.

Pondering over Harry's words, Niall resolved to get an answer by the time they returned to the hotel that night.


	13. Chapter 13

The view from above was almost as breathtaking as Harry. Miles above the coast, Niall stood at the edge of the balloon's basket with Harry's cheek resting against his hair and Harry's arms around his waist. It was a moment he knew he would treasure always, the presence of both Rich and the balloon's operator barely registering in his mind.

"Does Nola know about all this? That you're trying to... find a daddy for her?"

The question came out of nowhere but Niall had suspected Harry's mind was constantly working on the Nola aspect. "No. I told her I was taking a trip and would be back as soon as I could. Mom told her I'm getting to travel the world. Which remains to be seen."

"True, so far it's just the U.S."

"No hints on where we're going next?"

As soon as the words left Niall's mouth he wanted to take them back, panicked that Harry would be angry over his assumption that he'd still be there after tonight's ceremony. Harry only shook his head, though, saying, "Nope. You'll just have to wait and see."

Niall immediately relaxed, his fears put to rest on two levels; he was getting a rose tonight. Then again, Harry had been known to change his mind at the last minute. He'd done it twice so far regarding Niall, and who knew how many times with others. "Will it at least be outside the U.S.?" he tried.

"You're starting to sound like Liam," Harry chuckled, kissing Niall's temple.

"Nola wants a souvenir from Australia. Just putting that out there."

"Cute, but the locations are already chosen. It would take a lot to get them changed."

"Worth a try." Niall sighed and leaned into Harry, content. "It almost feels like we're flying. It's different than a plane, you can touch the sky."

"I know. I'd say I'm pretty close to Heaven right about now."

Niall nodded, glancing up before musing, "I wonder if Barbara is looking down at us."

"Maybe." After a pause Harry asked, "What would she be saying if she was?"

"That she's proud of me," Niall answered with hesitation.

"For?"

"Taking a risk. Moving on."

Harry spun Niall around in his arms. "You're not a big risk-taker, are you?"

"Not really, no," Niall said with a tiny smile. "I tend to calculate the rate of success before going into anything, and of course figure out how it can all go wrong and then decide it's not worth the risk."

"But this was?"

Shrugging, Niall replied, "Something had to change. Whether it's here I find my next step or somewhere else, this brought about the change I needed in my life. I have a lot more confidence now, after meeting you and the other guys. Barbara would be _extremely_ proud of me."

Harry nodded, then commented, "I can't even imagine living through that, Niall, the death of your wife. And with a kid to raise by yourself... weren't you scared at all?"

"I was terrified. Kept wondering how I'd do it, and I had these horrible panic attacks that would hit when I thought about it too much, worried about the future and my ability as a parent. I used to be so scared that I'd steer her in the wrong direction or not be able to give her what she needs."

"How did you get past that?"

"Well... my mom helped a lot. I was scared, and I was angry. The anger got out of control, especially when she kept talking to me about God and things happening for a reason. I'd never had a good relationship with God, being more logical and science-minded."

Harry smirked, "I don't think God is popular in a lot of the gay community."

"You'd be surprised."

"You know a lot of them?"

"No, but I read a lot," Niall smiled.

"Big surprise there," Harry teased.

"Hush." Niall smacked Harry's chest lightly. "Reading's good for you, you learn things."

"Why read myself when I have you and Nola to just teach me everything? It's more fun that way, and you'd probably do something like kiss me when I get something right."

After getting over the shock of Harry's comment, Niall said, "If you're lucky. But back to the topic, religion is prevalent in the lives of many gays. It's just harder for a lot of them because so many churches teach that homosexuality is a sin."

"That's my point. Why would you go to a church where you're told you're a monster?"

"I could go on for hours about this, it's a subject I'm very passionate about, but we don't have that kind of time. As for me, I was never much into God but my mom was."

"And she still accepts that you're gay without trying to change you?"

"She never once tried to change me. I came out to her after Barbara died, when the guilt was eating me alive. I was angry all the time and had kind of pushed Nola away. Both because she was a reminder of Barbara and because I was so afraid I'd be a horrible father."

"And probably also because you were afraid to get close to someone again." When Niall looked surprised, Harry laughed. "I'm smarter than I look, you know. When it comes to emotions I'm pretty good at reading people. You frustrate me a lot because I never know what you're thinking."

"Join the club," Niall replied. "The only time I really know what you're thinking is when you're kissing me."

"Oh, really?" Harry giggled. "And what am I thinking when I kiss you?"

"That you never want to stop."

The laughter died abruptly, Harry's expression turning to stone.

"You don't like that, do you? That I can read you so easily, at least when it comes to your attraction to me."

"There are a lot of things I don't like about you, Niall."

"Ouch. I'll try to not take that personally."

"It wasn't meant as an insult. I promise."

They stared at each other again, the wonder of the view and the city below forgotten as Niall tried to figure out the meaning of Harry's non-insulting insult. Harry's arms had been around Niall's waist since they'd faced each other, Niall resting comfortably against him, and now Niall stepped back slightly, needing space between them and a moment to think; Harry overwhelmed him sometimes.

Harry let him go, face neutral as Niall spun around to place his hands on the basket's edge. "So we were talking about God."

"Right. Mom kept saying Barbara's death happened for a reason, that God wanted her home, and it pissed me off. What kind of God rips a mother away from her child, you know?"

"Exactly."

"But she suggested I go to church with her, which I was ambivalent about, and she got me to do it by telling me all about the children's program they had there. By then Nola was three but smarter than most four-year-olds and she didn't have a lot of friends."

"Did Barbara work?" Harry asked suddenly.

"Not after Nola was born. I worked more hours at the library, made myself indispensable to them so they'd keep me around and pay me more, and she was happy to stay at home and be a full-time mother. I preferred that anyway."

Harry nodded. "Go on."

"So we went with Mom once and Nola had a blast. She talked all the way home about Jesus and how he lives in Heaven with Mommy and she's got wings now and... just a lot of stuff that made her happy. Happier than I'd seen her since Barbara died."

Harry's arms slid around Niall's waist, his cheek back in place against Niall's hair, and with his eyes closed Niall continued. "So we kept going back, and eventually some of what the pastor said started to sink in. And I started to heal."

"How did you ever come to terms with her death, though? What made that okay?"

"It's not okay, Harry. It never will be. But it's now... acceptable. I don't like it, but I don't have to; that's not how God operates. He doesn't give us what we want, He gives us what we need."

"And what you needed was for your wife to die? Somehow I don't believe that, I'm sorry."

Niall shrugged. "It brought me here, didn't it? Gave me the push to find what I needed to truly be happy for the first time in my life. I'm not saying that's why it happened. The hardest thing is I may never know why it happened. But it's not for me to know. I just have to trust that it was for the best."

"Niall, how in the world could that possibly be for the best? I'm having a hard time buying that."

Niall bit his lip, putting his thoughts in order and wondering how much he should say. "There was this guy. He worked at the grocery store, and every time Barbara went shopping she'd take Nola. He was always giving Nola things, and she said it was cute at first. Then the toys got bigger and eventually he told her he was buying them outside of work, just for Nola. She wasn't sure how to take that, but it creeped her out a little. Then he started asking a lot of questions, about Barbara and her life and she tried to go when he wasn't working but apparently the guy was the manager and worked a lot, like me. So I went in with them one time, a few weeks before she died, and the guy kept glaring at me. I got a really bad vibe. I told her to start shopping somewhere else and she did, but one day right before she died she stopped in for something she needed for dinner, said she didn't have time to go anywhere else and it was a quick thing. The guy pulled her aside and raged at her, accused her of flaunting me in front of him."

"Jesus, what a psycho." Harry shivered slightly.

"I know. She was shaken when she got home, and I called to complain about the guy but it turned out he was the main manager and what could I say? Two days later she was dead and I forgot all about him until I heard some of my co-workers talking about him getting arrested a few months later. Turns out he kidnapped women and tortured them for weeks before killing them."

"Jesus Christ, Niall!" Harry stepped away, rubbing his arms over himself as if he was freezing.

"I know!" Niall spun around again to watch Harry. "So once I started to believe in God and that whole 'everything happens for a reason' thing, I wondered if maybe that was the reason. Maybe God saved her from that and took her quickly rather than putting her through all that. It helped me get past her death. A lot."

"No shit. That's scary."

Niall nodded. "It's what you have to tell yourself when you're ready to scream, when you can't stand that bad things happen in this world. I have to trust that the Lord has a reason for everything, even when I don't understand it."

The intensity of Harry's gaze was again almost enough to knock Niall over. He reached behind himself to grip the edge of the basket, wondering if Harry was about to attack him and sort of hoping that was the case, but in the end all Harry said was, "I'm sorry you had to lose her, Niall."

"So am I."

"But... "

Niall glanced up, one eyebrow raised.

"But I'm really glad you're here."

This time it was Niall who dragged Harry close, their lips meeting desperately before their bodies did, and in less than a minute Niall's legs were off the floor of the basket and wrapped around Harry's waist. He couldn't breathe and he didn't even want to, just wanted to be owned like this for the rest of his life, wanted Harry to kiss him as if he was the air Harry needed to survive because when they gave in to each other, that's exactly what it felt like—Niall couldn't fathom _not_ being attached to Harry, how did he manage to live when they weren't kissing?

Harry lowered his body slowly to the floor, Niall settling in over his lap and then Harry was moving against him, the two of them panting and it wasn't enough, he needed more, always more, and before he knew it his hands were scrabbling at the buckle of Harry's belt, desperate to get it off him. Harry let out a sound of surprise that turned into a low moan, his own hands mimicking Niall's and finding Niall's belt, and when the word "Anne" was called out once again Niall barely heard it but apparently Harry did; he shoved Niall off of him roughly and yelled out, "Fuck!"

Niall fell back onto the floor, chest heaving, and finally got it. "Your mother's name," he gasped. "It's the only thing that breaks through and makes you stop, isn't it?"

Harry nodded. "I told Rich to do that for me, because I had a feeling this would happen. How the fuck do you _do_ that, Niall?"

"Me? Why is it my fault?"

"Because you're fucking hotter than the sun! Jesus!" Harry stood up, holding onto the basket for a minute before reaching down to help Niall up. "Come stand with me and enjoy this view. That's why we did this, right?"

"Right. I'm in a hot air balloon and haven't even properly enjoyed it." He stepped up to the edge and Harry moved into place behind him, Niall automatically leaning back into him but then Harry was gone.

"Nope. Not a good idea yet." Instead Harry slid his arm around Niall's waist, Niall doing the same, and together they watched the city pass them by miles below.

* * *

"We have about an hour before we have to be back." Harry reached out for Niall's hand, gripping it tightly as they headed toward the limo.

"Only an hour? What happened to the day?"

"It flew by. Literally."

Niall giggled. "Clever."

"Told you. I'm smarter than I look."

"No comment. What do you want to do for the next hour?"

"No way. I told you, this is your day."

"We've done what I want to do all day, though! Isn't there something you wanted to do?"

"I did it. I spent time with you. And now it's almost over and I feel like a prince, having to give you up before midnight."

"Or... " Niall glanced at his watch. "Five, anyway. Why so early?"

"Because of the ceremony tonight."

"Oh. Right. I totally forgot about that."

"Did you? You're not stressing out over whether or not you'll get a rose?"

"Strangely, no." Niall smiled, then frowned suddenly. "Why? Do I need to?"

Harry laughed, reaching into his pocket. "Here. Let's put your fears to rest right now."

They stopped at the limo, Harry turning Niall to face him while still holding one hand. He pulled out the rose and smiled. "Niall, will you accept this rose?"

"Yes," Niall grinned. "I would be honored."

Harry started to fasten it into place but then stepped back. "So if I pick you, does that mean I have to go to church with you guys? Because seriously, that's not my thing."

Niall blinked, stuttering, "W-well... no, I'd never force anyone to do something like that if they don't believe in it, I don't push my beliefs on other people. I mean, you're welcome to come if you want, but-"

Harry snickered. "You're so adorable. I was kidding, Niall. You're getting the rose either way."

"You're such a dick."

"Whoa! Harsh words from such a pretty face. I think I deserve a kiss to make up for that."

"Oh, do you?"

"Mmm. Definitely."

"Not until I get that rose, buddy."

It was fastened in a flash, Harry leaning down to kiss Niall deeply, and his voice was soft when he said, "Thank you. I had a lot of fun today."

"So did I. We should do this again."

Laughing, Harry hugged Niall tight to him. "We'll see. And I'll tell you what I've already had to tell some of the guys. I want you to remember that I have to be fair and give everyone a chance. I could be passing up my soulmate by focusing on one or two people instead of the whole group, so it's important that I date you all. But the feelings I have are real, and they don't change when I'm away from you. Remember that when you see me with other guys, and know that I cherish every second we spend together."

"Wow. Okay."

"It's going to get harder, Niall, as the days go by. Have you seen the show before?"

"Yes. Barbara was addicted to it. I know how bad it can get in the end, and how emotions get more intense and... I'm not looking forward to that."

"Neither am I. I've formed close bonds with a lot of you and having to say goodbye isn't going to be easy. When I think of sending any of you home it kills me."

"Even Scott and Peter?"

"We're not talking about Scott and Peter," Harry smirked. "Or anyone else, for that matter. But even sending them home was hard. My point is that as I weed out the ones I'm not meant to be with, that's leaving me with people I might be. People I like a lot. And eventually everyone is going to be sent home, except the one I decide is my future. That means you, Louis, or Liam will leave at some point."

"I know," Niall said softly. "I don't like to think about that."

"I don't either. But it's gonna happen. And when it does, don't hate me for it. I have to do it."

"Yeah." Sighing, Niall asked, "So why does it bother you that we're so close?"

Harry's gaze slid over Niall's head, his expression closing up.

"Talk to me. Is it a jealousy thing?"

"I'm not discussing it, Niall. You guys have done nothing wrong."

"Is it because of after the fact? You're afraid of what it'll be like when it's over and you've chosen one of us and feel guilty about the other two?"

"Can we talk about something else? We don't have a lot of time."

"Fine," Niall growled, frustrated. "You hungry?"

"Starved, actually. We didn't eat much of our lunch."

"Let's get some dinner."

The driver held the door open for them and they climbed into the limo, and for the last hour they talked of lighter things, enjoying simply being alone together.

* * *

Harry gave him one last kiss before they stepped out of the limo, both of them smiling when they leaned away from each other. "I'd walk you to your room but I don't think I'd let you go."

"I'll be fine. Thank you again, Harry. It was worth the wait for a one-on-one with you."

"Glad to hear it. See you at the party in a bit."

Niall nodded, then reached into the car for his backpack before making his way into the hotel, feeling as if he'd been on some vacation away from the world and now had to return to reality. He went straight to the main suite, relieved that Liam and Louis were nowhere in sight for the moment, and asked if he could have his few minutes to call his daughter.

Her greeting was music to his ears. "Daddy! I went to the zoo today!"

"You did? Grandma took you?"

"Uh huh! We went with Tyler. He got in trouble for trying to touch the tigers."

"Uh oh, is he okay?"

"Yeah. The monkeys were loud! Did you get me a kangaroo?"

Niall laughed, at the same time overcome with the need to hug her. "Not yet, sweetheart. I'm still hoping."

"I miss you, Daddy. You should come home tomorrow."

Heart squeezing, Niall fought back tears. "I miss you, too, pumpkin. I'll be home as soon as I can, I promise."

"Where are you?"

"I'm in a big city called San Francisco. Do you remember seeing the big bridge on that show we watched?"

"The red one?"

"Yes! I got to see that today. And I went in a big balloon, up into the sky."

"Daddy, I want to go in a big balloon!"

"We will, sweetie. I promise. I miss you," he said again, the urge to leave all of this craziness behind and jump on a plane hitting him so hard he couldn't stand it. As he reached up to run a hand through his hair it brushed against the rose, jolting him. He stared down at the rose and a calm settled over him. He had to stay, had to see it through with Harry. It was harder now, knowing he might end up losing this thing because now it was about more than finding a father for Nola, it was about keeping the man he'd fallen in love with.

"Tonight we're gonna watch the 'Diego' movie. Oh, and I beat Grandma at Candyland again. She says we have to find a new game cause I always win."

Laughing, Niall said, "Try Chutes and Ladders. She's pretty good at that one, from what I remember. I have to go now, Nola, but I'll call you tomorrow, okay? Be good and don't forget to brush your teeth tonight."

"I won't! I love you, Daddy."

Bare feet slapping on tile caught his attention and Niall looked up to see Louis and Liam dripping onto the floor, anxiously awaiting his report. "I love you, too, baby. So much. Goodnight."

"Night, Daddy!"

He hung up, the other two giving him a moment, but then said, "Grab me a beer?"

"On it." Liam disappeared into the refrigerator and came up with three of them, passing them around. "So you're back! That's a good thing."

"Yes, I'm back. It went well, I think."

"No surprise there," Louis grinned. "Come on, let's go talk in the room. We have to get ready for the party anyway."

Niall thanked the show's "monitor" who'd allowed him to call Nola, then followed the other two down the hall to their suite.

"So did you two spend the day in the pool?"

"Pretty much," Liam replied. "Louis tried to drown my new monkey."

"You deserved it! I warned you before we even started the races that if you cheated, the monkey would suffer."

"I didn't cheat! It's not my fault I kept kicking you, you were too close to me."

"Oh, whatever. Shut up and go shower."

"No, I want to hear about Niall's date." Liam settled onto his bed, not caring that he was getting the blanket wet with his trunks. "Come on, what was the surprise?"

"Well, he left it up to me. He said I got to choose where I wanted to go, and that I should surprise him."

Louis sat down on his own bed after slipping into a fresh pair of boxers. "He let you pick?"

"Yeah. So we went to the beach and then in a hot air balloon. And had dinner at this little place right on the pier, I had the best clam chowder."

"What did you do at the beach?" Liam asked.

"Had a picnic and talked. We talked a lot, actually. I didn't expect that."

"About what?"

Niall shrugged, turning to open his suitcase before answering Louis's question. "About Nola. He wanted to know about her and what it was like when Barbara died."

"Wow." Liam exchanged a glance with Louis. "You guys went deep."

"We did. I think he's trying to figure out if this is something he'd really want to do, get involved with a guy who has a kid. And not just that, but a single dad, which means he'd take on half the burden of being a parent. It's not like dating someone who's divorced."

"How much did you two make out?"

"Liam!" Louis yelled.

"What? You know you're dying to ask."

Niall chuckled as he grabbed a nice shirt from the closet. "There was some. He's an amazing kisser."

"That he is," Liam agreed.

"But it's good that you talked, too," Louis commented. "Those are the kinds of questions he should be asking."

"Exactly. I don't want to end up with a guy who doesn't take it seriously. It's a big deal."

Louis nodded. "And how did he seem to take it?"

Niall hesitated, thinking that over. "It's hard to know. He didn't show much as far as what he was thinking, but he did seem interested in knowing more. I mean, we seem to have a good thing together, and if it was just about the two of us I think it would work. But there's more to it, you know?"

Liam frowned. "Did you two argue at all?"

"Um... we came pretty close a few times. I don't know what it is about him, normally I don't let people get to me. He does, though. Manages to piss me off."

Louis smiled. "He does the same to me. Did I tell you guys I yelled at him that he should just send me home?"

Liam's jaw dropped. "Dude, are you crazy?"

"No, I'm honest. At the last party we had, when we thought he was sending Niall home, I got pissed and told him he should just send me home if that's what he wanted to do."

Studying Louis, Niall asked, "Because he was sending me home? Were you mad about that?"

"No, I was mad over whatever we were arguing about."

Nodding, Niall said, "Because... guys, he told me we all have to be prepared. That at some point one or all of us will be sent home as it gets closer to the end and we have to deal with it, not hate him for it. He's aware that we're so close. And I got the sense it pisses him off."

"It does," Louis confirmed. "I get that, too."

"But why?" Liam wondered. "Is he jealous?"

"He was, remember how he thought me and Niall had something going?"

"But you told him that's not true, right?" Liam reasoned.

"I did, but... he's still jealous. We've talked about this, he's a jealous guy."

"But he's got nothing to be jealous of!" Liam complained. "We're the ones who should be jealous, knowing he's making out with a bunch of other guys!"

"And I told him that, too," Louis stated. "Which is why we started arguing. This whole concept is kind of fucked-up. We were crazy to even get involved in this."

"Just try going home now." Niall fingered his rose again, speaking quietly. "I think we're all in too deep."

Liam frowned. "It's scary. Knowing you might not be the one he loves most."

Louis nodded. "I think that's the key thing right there, Liam. The word 'most.' Because he loves us all, but that's not enough. You have to be the one he loves _most_."

"It's going to be hard if he chooses one of us," Niall agreed. "Imagine having to see him after this is over, happy with one of us. Maybe we shouldn't get in touch right away after the show."

Niall's words had Liam shaking his head. "No. I'm not letting him get in the way of my friends."

"Are we even allowed to talk to each other before the show airs?" Louis mused.

"I'm not sure," Niall responded. "We may be forced to keep it a secret even from each other once it's over."

"But we'll all know," Liam reasoned. "One of us will go home first, then the last week will be the last two. So we'll know who won."

"That's assuming the three of us make it that far. Don't forget about Ryan. And honestly, the more time Harry spends with the other guys, the more he falls. It's natural."

"Niall, when you say things like that I want to punch you."

"Liam, you know it's true. He even said that to me, that he has to spend more time with everyone else. But he also said it doesn't mean he loves us any less."

Both nodded in response, having been told that before. "Well, at least you know you're safe," Liam sighed.

"What about you guys? Still feeling like you'll get a rose tonight?"

"I will," Louis answered. "The talk we had on the Ferris wheel... I'm not sure what it is, but he seems almost clingy at times. Maybe it's the fan thing, I don't know. But I'm pretty sure I'm not going anywhere tonight. Liam?"

"I think I'm good. Louis, you were there. Am I good?"

"Yeah, I'd say so. He adores you. The only reason we went on that merry-go-round was because we knew you'd enjoy it."

"Seriously?"

"Yep. We talked about it on the Ferris wheel, decided to do it for you."

"Aww, that's so sweet! I love you guys!"

Liam jumped up to tackle Louis with a hug, Louis managing to stay upright and not fall on the bed. Niall grinned. "I call the shower first! And it's good to know we're all still here for the next round. This is the first rose ceremony I haven't stressed over."

"You had a rose going into it before, though."

"True, Liam, but there was the chance I'd lose you. You hadn't gotten one yet. And he made you sweat, remember? That was torture."

"You guys are awesome. You'd totally miss me if I got sent home, wouldn't you?"

"Of course we would," Louis replied with a smile. "Whose monkey would I drown then?"

"Don't you dare touch Alex P. Keaton!" Liam backed up, pointing a threatening finger at Louis as he reached back to make sure his monkey was safe, if a bit water-logged.

"Alex P. Keaton? Oh my god, Liam, are you serious?"

"Shut up, Niall, I love old T.V. shows! I named the cheetah Elyse."

"Of course you did. Will there be a Mallory and Jennifer joining the party soon?"

"If someone wins me animals again, yes. I hope we do another carnival."

Louis shook his head watching Liam, but he couldn't fight the smile that cropped up. "Maybe if we get another group date, I'll do it this time."

"You can try, but are you as good as Harry? He's wicked at those games."

"I _am_ a big brother, don't forget. I've won a few stuffed animals in my time."

"Maybe you should make Harry jealous! That would be awesome, then he'd want to hang on to me tighter."

"And get rid of me. No, thanks."

"We could do it to each other. Make him jealous of both of us."

"Liam, you were the one who lectured me about jealousy and how damaging it is in a relationship."

"Yeah, I guess you're right. It would backfire and we'd both get sent home."

"By all means, then, do it," Niall smirked. "The sooner I get rid of you two the better."

"Niall, that is not very nice."

"See?" Liam hissed. "I told you, Louis, he's mean now! Let's punch him!"

Niall shrieked before rushing into the bathroom and locking the door behind him. "I was kidding!" he yelled.

"Meanie!"

Louis laughed, thinking of Liam's earlier words about a tiny part of him hoping Niall's date ended badly. He didn't think any less of Liam for it, because truly they all felt that way to an extent.

It was how the game worked.

* * *

For the first time, Harry did not request any private time with them at the party. It was a tad unnerving, but rather than take it in a bad way, they all put faith in the fact that Harry had meant every word he'd spoken to them and that they were safe.

Niall, of course, had no fears on that score. When he took his place next to Dave off to the side, he smiled at Liam and Louis, who were nervous now that the moment was upon them. Niall hoped the smile was reassuring and though he couldn't see it, he knew that Louis was holding Liam's hand, as Louis had held his the week before. He also knew when Harry stepped into the room that Louis had let go, and he mouthed a "good luck" to them.

Three more were sent home that night, Louis and Liam safe. Louis watched the three say their goodbyes to Harry and to the other guys, and he noted the sadness in Harry's eyes as he hugged each one. It couldn't be easy for him, and Louis felt a moment's guilt for yelling at Harry that they had more of a right to be jealous than he did.

Looking around the room, he did a mental count. Of course Niall and Liam were there, along with Dave, Jerry, Mike, Ryan, Austin, Jacob, Kevin, Max, Rob, and Jared.

_Thirteen of us left. We're halfway there._


	14. Chapter 14

Everyone was excited to hear their next stop was Hawaii. It was a new place for both Niall and Liam (Louis had of course visited before, taking his family there on vacation one year), and they'd always wanted to visit.

Chris came to visit once they were all settled in their new hotel, explaining that this week there would be one group date and a two-on-one date, and that this week only two people would be eliminated. Liam asked what a two-on-one date consisted of and Chris informed them that Harry would take two men out at once, with only one receiving a rose; this meant one would go home at the end of the date.

The pressure was definitely on, tempers short as everyone waited in the main suite for the first date card. Rob and Austin were known to bicker constantly, with Ryan calming them down when necessary, and today it was worse than usual.

Louis rolled his eyes as they started up again. "I hope Harry takes both of them on a date. Even a group one, I don't care as long as they're out of my hair for a while."

Liam agreed. "Maybe they'll get that two-on-one date and one will be sent home. I wonder how they act around Harry. I bet they don't fight."

"I don't think either has been on a group date, so we wouldn't know. Actually, they haven't been on any dates. No wonder they're pissy. I hope they get something this time, at least."

That much they could all agree on, Liam and Louis nodding when Niall finished speaking. The door opened and everyone jumped up, rushing to gather around the envelope placed on a table.

"This is for the group date," Rob said as he picked it up. "Come on, Harry, don't let me down!" He opened it and started to read. "'Deep below the surface you can explore the way to my heart. Ryan, Liam, Louis, Niall.' Damn! That's so unfair, some of us haven't even been on a group date yet, and you guys have all had one-on-one dates!"

It was true, and as the four guys looked around at each other there was guilt on their faces. Relief won out, though, as they all realized this meant more time with Harry—and for the first time, the three of them would be with Harry at the same time.

"Does one of us have to go home at the end of this date?" Liam asked in fear.

"No," Niall replied. "One will get the rose, but the others will stick around until the ceremony."

"At least we know we're safe from the two-on-one, though." As soon as Ryan said it, he cringed.

"Gee, lucky you!" Austin yelled. "Like he'd send you home anyway, he fucking loves you!"

"Hey," Louis interrupted. "Back off, he has no control over what Harry does. It's not his fault."

Niall decided it was time to leave. "Guys, let's go get ready for our date." The other two followed him out the door, Ryan bringing up the rear.

"Thanks, Louis. You didn't have to do that."

"Well, I understand why they're upset, Ryan, but it's not your fault."

"See you guys soon."

They waved at Ryan before heading into their own room, Liam bouncing back onto his bed. "This is gonna be so cool! I get to hang out with you guys _and_ Harry!"

"Don't forget Ryan," Niall reminded him.

"Yeah, but Ryan's okay. I can't believe we all got another date so soon! He must really like us."

"I do feel bad for the rest, though," Louis frowned. "Niall, didn't you say Harry said he needed to spend more time with the other guys?"

"He did. I'm kind of surprised we got dates at all this week. I expected us not to."

"It's because he loves us, guys. He can't get enough." Liam jumped up to find his suitcase. "What do we wear? Niall?"

"Uh... let me think. Deep under the surface... so we're going underground."

"Hmm," Liam mused. "Underground. So we should wear... pants?"

Louis nodded. "I remember reading about some caverns last time I was here. We're probably doing something like that, exploring caves."

"That would be cool, I've always wanted to do that," Niall grinned, excited now. "Definitely jeans. Let's go with t-shirts, too. Maybe some button-downs we can tie around our waists."

Two hours later the four men were climbing out of a van in front of a sign that read Kazamura Cave. Harry rushed over to hug them all, and Louis noted that he was more relaxed than they'd ever seen him on a group date. Harry was smiling, almost bouncing on his feet in excitement, arms around his and Liam's shoulders to drag them inside a nearby building. "Come on, this is gonna be fun! We're exploring a huge cavern! Keep up, guys!" he called back to Ryan and Niall.

"This must be the side of him that Liam sees," Niall smirked. "The little kid all grown up."

"It's cute, isn't it?" Ryan asked. "He's usually more serious with me."

"Me, too. Though that's probably because we tend to be more serious."

"Is it true you have a daughter, Niall? It's not my business but some of the guys were talking."

"It's true. She's back home in Missouri."

"And Harry... knows that?"

Niall nodded as they approached the other three and a man who had been waiting for them. "He does. So far he seems okay with it, which surprised me."

"I think there are layers to him that no one sees. It kind of scares me."

Shrugging, Niall replied, "I think what matters is that genuinely he has a good heart. I sense that much or I would've left a long time ago."

Harry craned his head around at them. "Guys, will you get over here? This is important stuff, you have to listen." He reached out an arm to grab Niall's, pulling him closer so that he was standing behind Liam.

Brian, their guide, explained that they would be underground for the next three hours, exploring what was known as a lava tube. They were given lights and helmets to aid them below, instructed not to take anything they might see no matter how tempting, and even had to wear gloves. The guide asked if any of them was claustrophobic, to which they all shook their heads, and after a few more instructions they set off down a crazily-built ladder to the cavern below.

Liam wondered if there were bats to worry about, and the guide laughed but informed him that no, they were safe from that. He led them through the caves, Niall joining him at the front of the little group after a few minutes in order to discuss everything they were seeing. As the history of the cavern was relayed, Niall threw out bits and pieces of his own knowledge, impressing Brian. Liam was still a bit on edge, glancing around nervously as if a swarm of bats was going to descend at any minute, and Louis absently grabbed his hand to reassure him as they walked. Harry and Ryan stayed between the two pairs of men, listening to Brian and Niall talk and asking questions occasionally.

As they went deeper, the temperature cooled and the air became more dense, making it harder to breathe. Liam shivered, prompting Louis to hug him close as they walked.

"You're fine," Louis whispered. "He said there aren't any bats in here."

"Yeah, but did you hear what he just said about the old times? They used to throw people in here in the dark, to punish them. Leave them here to die. I bet there are ghosts."

"Liam, there's no such thing as ghosts."

"You don't know that."

"Fine. If there are, I'll protect you, okay?"

"Promise?"

"Swear."

Liam sighed, trying to relax, and looked ahead in the gloom to see Harry watching them carefully. He said nothing, just spun around and returned his attention to Brian, but Louis' heart sank.

"Fuck. He's jealous again."

"But why? We're just talking."

"And cuddled up like a couple."

"Oh." Liam stepped away, Louis letting him before sighing. Why was it everything he did seemed to push Harry further away?

Then again, when he next looked up Harry's fingers were intertwined with Niall's, so really Harry had no room to talk.

Ryan wanted to hear more about those left for dead, so Brian indulged him. Liam was now starting to get extremely creeped out and at that point Louis didn't care—let Harry be jealous. He slid his arm around Liam's waist, Liam resisting at first because he was worried of what Harry might think, but the more Brian talked the more Liam's resistance faded and he clung to Louis, face buried in Louis' chest by the time Brian instructed them to turn off their lights.

Liam's head came up immediately. "Are you crazy?"

"Shh, I'm right here," Louis whispered, and after snapping off his own light, he reached out to extinguish Liam's as well.

The absolute darkness was meant to convey what it must have been like for those criminals who were left in the cave to die. With the sense of sight completely stolen away, the other senses heightened. Harry's grip on Niall's hand became stronger, and Niall felt another hand on his face as if searching before warm lips smothered his, setting his body on fire as he reached out to pull Harry closer. He felt like they were free-falling, no sense of direction or time or anything except the sensation of touch, and nothing existed other than the two of them seemingly floating in space.

Louis was trapped in a death grip, Liam's face buried in his chest once again and fingers digging into his back as Liam clung to him. He wrapped his arms tight around Liam and tried to reassure him through touch that everything was fine, they were perfectly safe and as long as he was there, Liam had nothing to worry about. When Liam's body began to tremble violently, Louis pressed his lips to Liam's hair, making shushing noises and whispering that Liam was safe, that he'd never let anything happen.

It was only about a minute of darkness but it seemed to stretch on forever, Ryan finally flipping his light on and finding a nearby rock to sit on. Harry stepped away from Niall, both of them needing a moment to breathe, and Liam slowly relaxed his grip on Louis.

"It's okay, open your eyes. We're safe."

"You okay?" Harry called over.

Liam nodded, not ready to let go of Louis yet, but he found his voice. "Just freaked out."

"Let's get moving, we've got about a half hour of the tour left."

They all followed Brian, Niall purposely keeping his distance in an effort not to attack Harry, and as they finished up the tour he spouted off knowledge of their surroundings. Liam remained under Louis' arm, not letting him out of his grip, and eventually they reached the surface once again.

"That was certainly intense," Ryan commented.

The remaining four all stared at each other; they couldn't agree more.

* * *

The evening was taken up by an authentic luau, the men joined by locals whose job it was to provide the true Hawaiian customs. There was music and so much food they felt as if they could be rolled home, the five of them sitting around a fire and laughing over nothing as they let their food settle.

"Who's gonna dance with me?" Harry asked, eyes sparkling as he gazed on each one in turn. "Liam?"

"Are you kidding? I can't even move. Ryan, go for it."

"No way. My sides are about to split. Louis. You're up."

"Uh... I don't dance. Ever."

"Oh, really?" Harry stood and dragged Louis to his feet. "You do now."

They all watched Harry lead Louis over closer to the little band, Louis shaking his head and looking scared.

"Man, this is awesome!" Liam exclaimed. "Never thought I'd see Louis scared."

"You should see him on horse," Niall giggled. "Poor guy, I thought he was gonna have a heart attack."

"Maybe someday I will," Liam smiled. "Can we really come ride horses with you and Nola?"

"Of course. One day when this is over and we have normal lives again, we'll do fun things like that."

"Louis says we can all go back to San Fran, too. I wanted to do some shopping."

"That would be fun," Niall agreed, then realized how awkward this must be for Ryan. He glanced over but Ryan's eyes were glued to Louis and Harry. Following his gaze, Niall took in Harry attempting to get Louis to dance, both of them giggling but Harry trying to be serious.

"Look at them, they're so silly," Liam said fondly.

Niall busted up laughing, the other two turning wide eyes on him. "I'm sorry, but coming from you... and I don't mean it as an insult. You're silly. And it works for you. It's why we love you so much."

Ryan nodded. "I have to agree, it makes everyone love you. There's not one person in that house who's said a bad word about you. Or hotel. Whatever. My point is everyone likes you."

"I keep hearing that."

"Maybe it's true, dummy." Niall shoved Liam, who shoved him back, and then they were giggling as if they'd been drinking for hours, the mood buoyant. It lasted until Harry's hands were on Louis, then his arms as well, and he was practically hanging on Louis as they moved. Silence reigned at the campfire as all three watched, the carefree mood sinking when it became real again that only one would end up with Harry.

"Wow, that hurts," Liam finally said softly. "Way more than it did when they were making out before."

"They're not even making out right now, just dancing," Ryan pointed out. "And it still hurts."

They looked up when Niall stood, then turned on his heel and walked away down the beach.

"You gonna go after him?" Ryan asked.

"No. He wants to be alone right now, I can tell."

They watched Louis and Harry laugh again as Louis almost fell, Harry catching him and holding on tight. "I think I've seen enough," Liam remarked.

"What are you gonna do?" Ryan asked.

"Make it stop." After standing up and dusting off his pants, Liam stomped over and pulled them apart. "Excuse me, I think it's my turn."

"Wow, Liam, really? You're gonna cut in on me like that?"

"I'm gonna show you how to dance, Louis. Stand back."

Harry's eyes widened in surprise, a smirk on his face. "Please. Show us how to dance."

Liam did, the two of them mesmerized by his powerful frame. He danced around Harry, who eventually started dancing with him, Louis finally returning to the campfire and dropping down next to Ryan.

"Where's Niall?"

"He went for a walk."

"Shit. Which way?"

"That way?" Ryan pointed down the beach, where darkness swallowed the shore.

"Fuck. I'll be back." After kicking off his shoes, Louis took off running in the sand, overtaking Niall about half a mile down. "Hey. You okay?"

"Fine. I just needed some air."

"Niall, you're at the beach. There's air everywhere."

"I'm aware of that, Louis."

"Then why did you-"

"I couldn't handle it, okay? It was fine when I didn't care, when I thought I was going home, but now it makes me sick to my stomach. I'm sorry. I can't... I don't want... I don't want to hate you," Niall finished, remembering Liam saying the same thing a few weeks before. Now he understood.

"Ah, Niall, come here. Stop walking."

"No. I'll be fine, just give me a few minutes."

"Don't make me tackle you. I will."

"Louis, just go back. I'm fine."

"Stop."

"I'm fine."

Louis took a flying leap and tackled Niall to the sand, the water washing up to the shore and soaking them quickly.

"Oh great, now I'm wet. Thanks, Louis."

"I told you to stop." Louis stood, helping Niall up.

"You're lucky we left our belongings in the car. I'd be pissed if my wallet got ruined."

"You're pissed anyway. Knock it off, we knew how this was gonna be. Would it make you feel better to go make out with Harry in front of me? Go for it, I won't stop you."

Niall sighed, fighting for calm. "I'm sorry. You're right. I know you're right, it's just... really hard."

"You think I don't know that? I walked away from Liam seducing him, and I bet right now they're mauling each other on the sand."

"Is that why you left?"

"No, I left because I was worried about you. And poor Ryan, sitting there by himself having to watch that."

"Yeah, let's go back. I do feel bad for Ryan. Liam and I were just talking about what we're gonna do after the show and I felt horrible."

"He's not a bad guy, he's just not... " Louis trailed off, not sure how to express it.

"He's not one of us. That's the best I can come up with."

"Exactly! He's not one of us. I got jealous when we came back from the carnival and you two were playing FIFA. Like you did after your first group date."

"We're ridiculous. How can we be jealous if we're just friends and want nothing more?"

Louis shrugged. "It's just that kind of friendship. It's our little coven, and nobody else is invited into it."

"Except Harry."

"Except Harry," Louis agreed. "He kind of fits, don't you think?"

"Yes, and I think that's the only reason it might work after the show, this friendship between the four of us. Because he fits. I'm still not sure he's okay with that, though, having to see us all after saying goodbye to two of us. Or maybe even all three."

"He'll have to live with it. I'm not giving up you or Liam."

"Good to know."

When they returned, it was to find Ryan with Harry, and Liam by himself at the fire. Louis immediately felt guilty for leaving him alone. "Everything okay?" he asked, settling down next to Liam and slinging an arm over his shoulders.

"Yeah. I felt bad for Ryan, so I told Harry to dance with him."

"Seriously?" Niall asked.

"Well, he was all alone over here. I feel kind of bad for the guy, he's kind of left out."

Louis and Niall smiled at each other, then relayed the conversation they'd just had about the same thing. Liam agreed with everything, adding, "I wonder if Harry will be able to handle it, though. Because he won't just stop loving the other two. And wouldn't we always be worried about that? Whoever wins him?"

"That's... a very good point," Niall responded, catching Louis' eye.

"Let's not worry about it right now. For all we know, Ryan's going to win."

"He got the rose," Liam said in a monotone.

"What?" Both Louis and Niall squinted in their direction, and sure enough there was a rose fastened to Ryan's shirt.

"Well, fuck," Louis whined. "What the hell did he do that we didn't?"

"Right?" Liam complained. "They hardly talked all day."

"Maybe that's why he did it," Niall pondered. "Because he felt bad for leaving Ryan out. Harry would do that."

They all stared over at Harry and Ryan, who were laughing and dancing, though somewhat awkwardly.

"You know what I noticed?" Liam tossed out. "About Ryan?" The other two waited, eyes on the couple near the musicians, and he continued, "Harry doesn't touch him."

"What?" Niall lifted an eyebrow at Louis, who shrugged.

"I'm serious. I noticed it earlier today, when Louis and I were walking behind them in the cave. Like... with all of us, there's always some kind of touching. He holds our hand or puts his arm around us or whatever. He even did that with Jerry and Dave on our group date last week, and in the limo on the first one with Jerry and Mike. But I've never seen him actually touch Ryan."

Louis frowned, thinking that over and calling to mind the few times he'd seen the two of them together. He realized then that he hadn't actually witnessed them together much.

Niall's mind seemed to be running the same track. "We haven't seen them together a lot, Liam. How are we to know what happens when they're alone?"

"But that's my point. How much can really be happening when they're alone if nothing's happening when they're around other people? I mean, not even hand-holding? Harry _loves_ to hold hands. Look at them right now, they're dancing but there's all that space between them. He was hanging all over Louis."

"You too," Louis threw in. "He was hanging on you, too."

"Exactly. Niall, go cut in. See if he touches you while you dance."

"I'm not interrupting them! That's rude!"

"Just do it!"

"Liam, no!"

Louis nudged Niall. "I think he's got a point. Go dance with him, see what happens. In the beginning he didn't touch you much, right?"

"No, but that's because he always felt like I didn't want to be touched. The first time he kissed me, he said he thought I was never going to let him do it. Not that I'd ever stopped him."

"I'm telling you," Liam pressed. "I've been watching them, they don't touch. That's got to mean something."

"Go, Niall." Louis pushed him harder. "Go break them up, see if Harry touches you."

"You guys are insane." Niall stood up anyway, rolling his eyes before making his way over hesitantly.

Harry's gaze caught him over Ryan's shoulder, his lips splitting into a grin. "Niall! Last dance of the night, get in here."

Ryan graciously moved away, smiling at Niall before heading back toward the campfire, and the second his back was turned Niall was in Harry's arms, pulled up close against his body.

"Hey, I was afraid you weren't gonna let me dance with you."

"I hate dancing."

"Not really a surprise." Harry's hands slid up Niall's arms, settling behind his neck. "You can touch me, I won't bite."

"Unless I want you to," Niall grinned, sharing the old joke, but his arms wrapped around Harry's waist. "I'm not sure how we can dance to this type of island music in quite this position."

"We'll make it work." Harry leaned in for a kiss, Niall sighing in relief because every time their lips touched it felt like coming home. He didn't allow it to go on too long, knowing they were being watched and how deeply it hurt to witness, having been on the other end. "Thank you for inviting me on this date. The caverns were amazing."

"Yeah, I remember watching something in school when I was kid, these guys went exploring and I always wanted to try it. That's what's cool about doing this show, I'm getting to try things I've always wanted to."

"You were so cute, all excited about it. Ryan and I thought it was adorable."

"Oh, did you? Is that what you two were whispering about behind us?"

"Damn, this time I actually _was_ whispering about you and got caught."

Harry laughed, kissing Niall's forehead before hugging him close again. "How's Nola?"

"She's good! Pissy because my mom finally found a game that she can win."

"Oh, yeah? Which one, I'll try it on Lou's daughter."

"Chutes and Ladders. It's about counting more than colors, but it's still anybody's game. I'm not sure why Nola has worse luck with it."

"Does she still want you to go to Australia?"

"Of course. She asks every time I call. 'Did you get me a kangaroo yet?'"

"Is that why she wants you to go there?" Harry giggled. "She thinks you're gonna bring her back a kangaroo?"

"A baby one, to be exact. And when I made the mistake of calling it that last night, I was harshly reminded that it's called a joey."

"It is?"

"Yes, Harry. A baby kangaroo is called a joey."

"Huh. See? This is why I need you around. I learn things. And then I drop these random bits of knowledge into a conversation and I sound smart."

"Right, because there's no other reason to keep me around." Another giggle escaped Harry, prompting Niall to comment, "You're happy tonight. I haven't seen you this relaxed before today. What changed?"

"A lot of things, Niall. A lot of things. And no, I can't talk to you about them. But as I get closer to my goal, I let go of things that drag me down. And we'll leave it at that."

Thinking of the three who had gone home in San Francisco, Niall wondered again what had happened between Harry and Peter. He knew better than to ask, though, and wondered who would be sent home this week. Only two were leaving. Would any of their group be sent home? Or Ryan, perhaps?

"By the way," Harry murmured, leaning down to speak into Niall's ear. "I've discovered something about myself that I never would've guessed."

"What's that?" The tone of Harry's voice sent shivers down Niall's spine and it was only then he realized just how closely they were standing and that their "dancing" wasn't more than swaying in time to the music. His breath caught when Harry spoke again.

"I'm apparently turned on by smart guys. Watching you in that cave today, using all those big words and knowing so much about everything, every time you mentioned the name of a rock or started talking about how lava cools and turns to magma, whatever the hell that is, I wanted to jump you."

Niall's head dropped onto Harry's chest, his breathing stilted. "Is that why you attacked me in the dark?"

"I couldn't help myself. The opportunity was there and I took it."

"I wasn't complaining. And I think if Rich was here, he'd yell 'Anne' right about now."

Surprised, Harry laughed hard, hugging Niall tight before putting distance between them. "Rich has the day off today, we're stuck with Larry. He's a nice guy."

"He's really quiet, too. I kept forgetting he was even there inside the caves earlier."

"Yeah, they're good at their jobs. Really good."

"Harry, I'm completely monopolizing you. It's not fair to the other guys, we should get back to the fire."

"Fine," Harry sighed. "It's about time for dessert anyway."

Harry held Niall's hand until they were back to the other three, then squeezed it before letting go and sitting down between Liam and Ryan. Liam shot Niall a look that said "I told you so" and Niall smirked. It was true, the moment Niall was near Harry's hands were on him. Now as he watched, Harry laid a hand on Liam's knee, absently twining his fingers with Liam's when Liam reached down to touch it.

Niall had no idea what it meant, but it was absolutely the case—Harry did not touch Ryan. He'd hugged them all at the cave when they first met up, and he hugged them all again when they said goodnight (Liam even got a kiss on the cheek), but otherwise Harry's hands were nowhere near Ryan for the rest of the evening.

It gave them all hope.

* * *

The two-on-one date was given to Austin and Rob, and once they were gone the general consensus was that no matter who went home, at least there would be peace in the house. The group was allowed out to enjoy the beach for most of the day, all of them reveling in the freedom and alternately sunning themselves and playing in the water until it was time to return for the rose ceremony. They found that Austin had returned, Rob had not, and that left them with only one to be eliminated that night.

At the cocktail party, Harry made a point to take each of their group aside, if only briefly, and each was left knowing they'd be getting a rose—not from anything Harry said, but the fact that he assured them with kisses that his feelings hadn't changed. With Niall there was an extra step, one that shocked him, and when Harry mentioned it, Niall asked him to repeat the words.

"I asked if maybe we could call Nola. If you're not comfortable with that, it's totally fine."

Looking at Harry more closely, Niall saw that he was terrified. Whether of Niall saying no or saying yes, he wasn't sure, but he forced his heart to stop thundering and said, "She's probably in bed. It's later there. Like the middle of the night."

"Right. I wasn't thinking."

Sensing that Harry was mentally backtracking in a hurry, Niall suggested, "Maybe we can do that next time we're alone together. I don't know when that'll be, or even if we'll get that chance, considering I might be going home tonight, but if there's an opportunity, we'll do that."

"Really?"

"Yeah," Niall smiled. "I'm not sure how I'll introduce you, I guess as my friend, but if you tell her you might take me to Australia, she'll be your best buddy. Mention you might bring her a koala, and she's yours for life."

Harry laughed, pulling Niall in tight and kissing him lightly. "I'll keep that in mind, should the opportunity arise."

When they all gathered for the ceremony, Louis and Niall stood with Liam between them, the three holding hands. Niall mused that eventually they wouldn't be able to do that, because there wouldn't be enough men left standing in front of them to block the view, but for now he was happy to have his safety blankets there with him. Jacob was the only one to not receive a rose, and Louis let out a breath of relief when it was over.

They were down to eleven now.


	15. Chapter 15

This time Liam did insist on the window seat, dragging Louis down next to him as they got settled in for the long flight to Las Vegas, Nevada. Niall was only slightly disappointed they weren't bound for Australia, but knew chances of that were slim.

As they neared the city, Liam gasped. "Look! That big pyramid thing! I hope we get to go in there, I heard the elevators are funky."

"They are," Louis confirmed. "They're called inclinators and they go at an angle."

"Of course you've been here," Liam sighed. "Is there any place you haven't been?"

"Lots of places. Why don't you ever travel? You've got the money, right?"

"The business, remember? Since I was a kid, that's been my whole life."

"That and the gang from 'Happy Days'," Louis teased.

"Yeah, I miss my boys."

"Why don't you have any female dogs?" Niall asked.

"I don't know, I just picked the ones that stood out to me at the shelter. Except for Chachi, I got him when he was almost hit by a car. That little shit stood in the middle of a busy-ass street and barked at the car like 'How dare you?' Ah, Chachi." Liam shook his head as the other two laughed. "What about you, Niall? You ever been here?"

"No. I don't travel much anyway, but especially since Barbara died."

"That's all gonna change if you end up with Harry," Liam reminded him. "He'll fly you around the world."

Niall frowned, and Louis said, "Not necessarily, Liam. He's got to know that if he chooses Niall, he'll be expected to be home more. I mean, that is what you want, right?" he asked.

"Yeah," Niall sighed, "but it's not really fair to ask him to give all that up, either. If he wants to, fine. But I'm not sure he's thought all that through. It's a huge adjustment."

"True," Louis agreed. "Have you guys talked about that aspect at all?"

"A little. He said fame isn't everything it's cracked up to be and that he'd do what he could to protect me and Nola, but... I'm not sure that's enough. Right now, I really don't know if what he's offering is what Nola needs."

"Do you love him?" Liam asked simply.

"Yes," Niall answered without hesitation.

"Then everything else will work out."

Both Niall and Louis stared in wonder at this man who had such absolute faith in love to overcome all obstacles.

"Hey, guys!" Ryan called over from his side of the plane. "Did I hear you talking about the Luxor earlier?"

"Yes!" Niall answered, shaken out of his thoughts. At Liam's look of confusion, he explained, "That's the big pyramid."

"Oh!"

"Chris told me we're staying there!" Ryan smiled.

"No way! How cool is that?"

Liam's excitement was infectious, and by the time everyone left the plane, they were ready for a good time.

* * *

The group date came first. Everyone knew there were to be two single dates and one group, and they all prayed for a one-on-one even though Niall, Louis, Liam, and Ryan felt it would be unfair for any of them to get it. Still, their fingers were crossed to be excluded from the group date.

Austin read the card this time. "Okay, here we go. 'Together we'll learn how to not ruin the ancient art of love. Jared, Kevin, Mike, Niall, Dave.'"

Niall's heart went wild. While it wasn't time alone with Harry, it was still time spent with him, and Niall knew Harry would find a way to make him feel special. He also knew what a bad idea it was for the two of them to be alone, and giggled softly before clearing his throat at the glares received from those who still hadn't received a one-on-one date.

That left two single dates, and as the three returned to their room Liam said, "Okay, Louis. We still have a chance here."

"What are the odds we'll get a second one-on-one before those guys even get a first?"

"Pretty good, I'd say," Liam grinned. "He really likes us."

"Yes, but he tries to be fair."

"That's true," Niall agreed. "He also said once that he doesn't want to focus too much on one guy and pass up what might prove to be his soulmate."

"Well, he has no worries, because I'm right here and he's not passing me up."

Louis immediately shoved Liam off the bed they'd settled on, Niall laughing as he rooted through his suitcase. "Okay... ruin and ancient and learn. I'm assuming we're going to ancient ruins of some kind."

"Are there any of those around here?" Louis questioned, scooting over to make room for Liam again.

"Not that I know of. There are a few Indian reservations, though. Maybe he means that?"

"Who knows?" Liam waved a dismissive hand. "You'll just drive yourself crazy trying to figure it out. All I know is it's hot out there, so don't wear anything heavy."

That was sound advice, so Niall dressed in his usual jeans and a t-shirt, taking along a light jacket just in case.

Harry picked them up this time, strolling into the main suite with a smile for everyone. Jared and Dave swarmed him, Mike gravitating toward Niall while Kevin stood aloof.

"You guys ready to learn today?" Harry asked with a grin.

Dave's eyes narrowed. "You're not gonna quiz us at the end of the date, are you?"

"Maybe," Harry smirked. "Make sure you're listening. Kevin, get over here." He lifted an arm in invitation, Dave moving out of the way while Harry pulled Kevin aside and out onto the balcony.

"What's that about?" Jared asked suspiciously.

Everyone shrugged, none of them knowing too much about Kevin; Jacob had been closest to him, and Jacob was now gone.

Remembering the time Harry had pulled him aside before a date, Niall suggested, "Something probably happened that they need to clear up."

"When?" Austin argued. "He hasn't been on any dates."

"That's not true, he was on ours," Louis stated, referring to himself and Niall. "In Arizona."

Max nodded. "He was. When you guys had to walk the horses, he was pissed. Kept saying Niall must've done it on purpose."

"Give me a fucking break." Rolling his eyes, Louis continued, "You can't fake a horse's sprained foot. He was just jealous."

Thinking back to the reactions from all the guys when Harry had instructed them to go on, Niall agreed; there had been a lot of jealousy that day.

Once they returned, Harry's arm was firmly around Kevin's shoulders and he seemed appeased for the moment. Niall could foresee that Harry was going to dote on Kevin for the span of today's date and tried not to get jealous, but anytime Harry touched one of the other guys it was difficult to watch.

"Liam. You haven't badgered me yet, what's wrong?"

Niall looked up, Harry's words surprising him as Louis snickered.

"Told you, Liam. Even Harry knows something's on your mind when you're quiet."

Liam shoved Louis, who giggled and barely kept his balance, before addressing Harry. "I'm just making a list of all the things I want to say to you on our next one-on-one date."

"Uh oh," Louis teased. "Look out, Harry, you'll never shut him up. Ever heard of Chachi, the little dog who's all bark and no bite?" Louis pointed at Liam, nodding.

Both Niall and Harry laughed while Liam glared at Louis. "Dude, I know where you sleep. Remember that."

"But only I know where I hid Joanie."

Liam's face paled. "Joanie? Where's Joanie?"

"Be nice to me today and you'll find out."

"Shit. Joanie!" Liam rushed out of the room, then ran back quickly to give Harry a smack on the lips. "Bye, Harry!" Then he was gone again, leaving the group shaking their heads.

"He's like a hurricane," Harry smiled. "Come on guys, we're not going far but we have a lot to cover today." Keeping Kevin close, Harry led his dates out the door.

At the rear of the group, Niall glanced back to wave at Louis.

"Good luck," Louis mouthed.

Niall nodded, but he'd noted the same thing Louis had-as the pressure heated up, Liam's antics weren't as adorable to those who were jealous as they once had been. "Keep an eye on him," Niall instructed.

Louis smiled. "Already planned."

* * *

As the inclinator descended, Harry informed the small group that their entire date would consist of activities inside the hotel.

Surprised, as Niall had expected to visit ruins of some kind, he commented, "How does our date card make sense then?"

"You'll see," Harry winked.

Niall noted that Mike was still gravitating toward him as they moved through the hotel's lobby level. "You okay?"

"Yeah, just... " He leaned closer and said quietly, "I never know who to trust, I feel like everyone wants to take each other down. Ryan said you're someone I can trust."

"Oh. Really? Thanks. I don't play dirty, I figure if I'm not meant to be with Harry, someone else is and why should I stand in their way?"

"Exactly! Why can't everybody else think that way?"

"Because most people only think of themselves."

"In the beginning I was kind of like that. On our last group date together I was working hard to gain Harry's attention."

"What changed that?"

"A couple things. Ryan, for one. He told me Harry wouldn't go for that, and he was right. But you guys, too. None of you except Liam throw yourselves at him, and yet he still seems to like you best. I figured Ryan must be right."

"You and Ryan are pretty close?"

"Yeah, we're gonna keep in touch when this is over. Even if he wins. Which would be hard, I guess, to see him with Harry, but like you said-if they're meant to be together... you know?"

"I do." Niall noticed Harry turn back as if searching and sped up. "Come on, he hates it when we lag."

"Guys!"

"We know, we know!" Niall called out over the sound of slot machines from every direction. "Coming, Harry!"

Harry grinned at him. "Got caught again, didn't you?"

"Paranoid, Harry?" Niall grinned back.

Satisfied now that everyone was together, Harry winked and faced forward again to lead them toward an escalator. Niall's heart fluttered, and he wondered what it was about Harry that a simple wink could affect him so deeply.

The upper level of the hotel was dedicated to tours and attractions relating to ancient Egypt, and Niall began to understand. It wouldn't be an actual ruin they were exploring, but most likely facsimiles of them with possibly a few actual artifacts here and there. Either way, he was excited, the prospect of spending a few hours studying mummies and pharaohs a welcome one.

They stepped up to King Tut's tomb, a member of the staff waiting for them and explaining that it would be a self-guided tour with the aid of wands that held pre-recorded information they could play at each station.

"Oh, we won't need those," Harry said with a wave of his hand. "We've got Niall."

Eyes widening, Niall spluttered. "Excuse me?"

"Come on up here," Harry smirked. "You're our guide for the day. I'm sure you know more than these little wands anyway, right?"

"Uh... maybe?" Blushing, Niall stepped up next to Harry. "You want me to be the guide?"

"Absolutely. Use all your big words and impress us."

Feeling that the other guys were not happy about this, Niall nevertheless did what Harry asked, reading the plaques quickly at each station before explaining it in his own words and adding his own knowledge. A few of the guys actually seemed interested, asking questions that Niall answered as well as he was able, but it wasn't until about halfway through when he felt Harry's gaze piercing him that Niall finally got it.

" _I'm apparently turned on by smart guys."_

One glance at Harry was all it took for Niall to know that Harry did indeed want to "jump him" right then and there, though he was doing an admirable job of keeping his feelings masked. Niall, however, had come to know that look in Harry's eyes, and his body responded immediately, so powerfully that he had to turn away and rest a hand on the glass enclosure of the current station they were gathered in front of.

"What are we doing after this?" Kevin asked suddenly.

"There's another attraction like this one, as well as an IMAX presentation about mummies," Harry replied. "And then we'll have a little fun in the casino."

Kevin huffed, "Is Niall going to be our tour guide for that stuff, too?"

"I think he's way more entertaining than those little recorded things would be," Mike commented. "He can answer all my questions."

"Or at least guess," Niall smiled, turning back to face them. Harry winked at him and Niall blushed before shuffling to the next station and continuing the "lesson," again feeling Harry's green eyes on him.

The next attraction went in a similar fashion, Niall spouting his "big words" while the other guys listened and learned-all except Kevin, who Niall was getting increasingly hostile vibes from. Perhaps Kevin was aware of the undercurrent between them as well. Remembering the feelings he got before leaving the hotel that morning, Niall thought Liam wasn't the only one who needed to watch his back.

As the group made its way to the IMAX theater Niall purposely hung back at the rear, letting the other guys fawn over Harry. This time when he and Mike talked quietly amongst themselves Harry allowed it, so maybe he was picking up on the hostility as well and was content to let Niall slide under his radar.

Or maybe he was enjoying the adoration of many, as Harry was wont to do.

Niall was disabused of that notion when everyone was being seated for the movie. The place had been reserved for their group, empty when they entered the large room, and Harry stood at the edge of the front row allowing everyone else to be seated first. When Niall passed, Harry stepped on his foot hard, Niall halting in surprise and a little bit of pain as a gasp left his mouth.

"Oh, I'm sorry! Are you okay?" Harry motioned for Mike to take a seat while staring at Niall in concern.

"Yeah. Ow, though," he chuckled.

"Sorry, dude. Sit down, rest your foot."

Niall did, moving toward the center and taking a seat next to Mike before Harry settled in next to him. "You gonna make it or should I go get some ice from the snack bar?" Harry teased.

"There isn't even a snack bar here, Harry. I'm fine, it just smarts." The word set off a light bulb in Niall's brain, and he understood that just as Harry had planned their date so that Niall could "teach," he'd sneakily maneuvered Niall into the seat next to him. "You're a dick," he grinned, keeping his voice low.

"I get what I want," Harry whispered, nuzzling his lips against Niall's earlobe in a way that had him fighting to suppress a shudder.

Niall glanced to his right to find both Kevin and Dave watching closely. He closed his eyes, sighing inwardly, and hoped Harry wouldn't make this worse by putting an arm around him at some point. Truly it wasn't fair, Harry should have sat himself in the middle of the contestants. A greedy, jealous part of Niall was glad he hadn't, though.

About halfway through the movie, which normally would have had Niall's attention glued to it because not only was it informative but in 3D, Harry stepped on his foot again. He bit his lip to keep from crying out in surprise, though really he shouldn't have been; he'd been attuned to Harry's every movement and knew Harry was feeling what he was, the need to touch or go insane. It still blew Niall's mind that Harry could feel such intense desire for him.

Harry stood up without a word and was about to exit when Kevin started to rise. Something in Harry's eyes had Kevin sitting right back down, Harry saying he'd return shortly, it was just a trip to the bathroom. Before leaving he kicked lightly at Niall's ankle, Niall ignoring it because if he stood up now and followed Harry, all hell would break loose.

Niall lasted all of five minutes before the pull was too strong. "Fuck," he muttered to himself, rising after whispering to Mike that he'd be right back.

"Where are you going?" Kevin glared, not caring how loud he was.

"Chill, Kevin. Harry should be back any minute. And if you're so worried about it, come take my seat." Without another word, Niall turned his back and headed up the aisle, wondering if Harry was waiting for him in the bathroom.

As he passed a closet the door suddenly opened and he was yanked into it, the door slamming behind him before Harry kissed him hard. There was no time to react, Niall simply sank into it, letting the lust rise as it always did when Harry's lips were on him. When Harry pressed him up against a wall, Niall's legs as usual found their way around Harry's hips as his tongue dove deeper into Harry's mouth.

It occurred to Niall that there was no cameraman around. He seriously doubted any cameras had been installed in this closet and wondered if that was why Harry chose it, and then wondered why Rich hadn't followed Harry in the first place. Further thought was erased as Harry's hand slid between them to cup him, Niall's legs lowering to allow him to thrust into the grip with a groan.

A loud knock on the door caused them to freeze, panting as they stared at each other with wide eyes as if not sure how they'd arrived at this place. "Fuck," Harry hissed, backing away and running a hand through his hair.

A second knock was followed by "Harry? You in there?"

Harry let out a ragged sigh and peeked out. "Yeah. We're good. We'll be right out." He closed the door, licked his lips, and started giggling.

"Rich?" Niall asked.

"Yep. He's like my personal watchdog. I need to stop being alone with you."

"This was your fault. My feet will not thank you for the abuse."

"I barely touched you. And it's not like this was torture for you, animal."

Niall couldn't argue that, smiling slowly before dragging Harry back down for a long kiss. He knew it wasn't fair to keep Harry to himself but their time was so limited anyway that he couldn't help it.

"Listen," Niall said when they pulled apart. "Kevin's about to go ballistic. Show him some attention when we get back in there?"

"Always trying to push me toward someone else," Harry smirked. "You and Louis are masters of that."

"Really? Louis does that?"

"For you and Liam, yes. He looks after you two."

"I know. We look after each other." When a sliver of something unreadable crept into Harry's eyes, Niall pounced. "Okay, talk to me. Tell me why you hate it that we're so close."

"I don't hate it," Harry argued, immediately annoyed. "Why do you keep bringing it up?"

"Because it obviously bothers you and we deserve to know why."

"You don't get to know why. I can't talk about a lot of things and you have to deal with it."

"I love how you use that excuse whenever it's convenient for you. We're not on camera right now, Harry, so talk."

"We need to get back in there."

"Oh, so now you're in a hurry. You need to learn how to talk about your feelings."

" _You_ need to learn how to accept that there are some things in life you won't ever understand."

Niall blinked, feeling like he'd been slapped across the face. "Seriously? You're telling _me_ that? You think I haven't accepted that, after the talk we had in San Francisco?"

Harry shook his head, turning away. "Just let it be, okay? This isn't something you'd understand."

"Then explain it! Help me understand! You're always telling me to open up, why not try that yourself?"

"I can't!" Harry exploded. "I have to keep everything bottled up, I don't have buddies to talk to like you do! I don't even have Lou, and I'm going crazy without her because she always knows what to say. She always knows what I want even when I don't and right now I'm going insane, there's so much, just so much I'm feeling and I don't know what to do and-"

Niall kissed him, calming him down in the one way he knew would work. Harry didn't respond at first, so worked up, but then he let Niall soothe him, opening his mouth and heart to take what Niall offered until they were kissing deeply, though not in their usual desperate fashion. "I'm sorry," Harry whispered, arms closing around Niall to hug him close. "It's just so hard. I didn't know it would be this hard."

"I know. I'm sorry, too. This is hell on everyone involved. Just trust your heart, Harry. Let it tell you what's right for you and when you need to cry, we're here. I can promise you that much, Louis and Liam and I are here for you if you need a friend."

"Until I send you home. What then?"

Niall's heart cracked at the prospect, but he smiled and said, "Then you'd better make sure we stay until the final round."

Harry chuckled, kissing Niall's hair. "You're all so wonderful. How am I possibly supposed to choose between all of you?"

Niall wasn't sure if Harry was referring to everyone or the three of them, but he answered, "I don't know. I don't envy you, Harry."

Harry closed his eyes. "It's not all fun and games, you know. Yeah, making out with a bunch of guys is nice, but hearts are gonna get broken." After a pause he mused, "Do you think World War III has broken out in there yet?"

"Are you seriously amused by that? I have to live with these people, you know."

Harry smirked. "Sorry. I don't mean to make it harder on you. Just stop being so sexy."

"Stop putting me in positions you _find_ sexy."

"Oh, there are a number of sexy positions I'd like to try with you."

"Harry!" Niall gaped, face red.

Harry laughed, hugging Niall to him again. "You're so cute when you blush. And we'll have to talk about sex at some point, right?"

"If I make it that far."

"Oh. Right. Exactly. Let's just get back in there."

Smirking at Harry's slip and wondering if Harry did that with everyone or just him, Niall stopped him. "Wait. I was wondering something. You said the locations are already picked, but I have no doubt you set up this date specifically to watch me be a tour guide. How does that work?"

"The cities are chosen. I work with the producers, though, and get to plan the dates."

"Ah. Very nice."

"I thought so."

"So... no chance for Australia?"

Harry laughed, dipping down for one more kiss. "I'm sorry, no. It's not one of the chosen countries."

"Okay," Niall sighed. "Let go face the lynch mob."

With a smile Harry opened the door and led Niall back to the theater.

* * *

Niall realized too late they should have gone back to the theater separately. Had he been thinking, he would have insisted on that, but of course as usual Harry scrambled his brain.

The movie had apparently ended, leaving him to wonder how long they had actually been in that closet. Surely not more than fifteen minutes? He was distracted by a loud voice coming from the front of the theater, though, as Kevin yelled, "You're stupid if you think Niall didn't follow him out there on purpose! They're probably making out somewhere right now!"

Harry halted at the back of the theater, putting out a hand to keep Niall there as well. No one, except perhaps Rich, had seen them come back in.

"Niall's not that kind of guy," Mike argued. "You just get jealous of anyone who gets near Harry."

"Oh, like you don't? Like none of you do?"

Dave tossed out, "Kevin's right, Mike. Niall's been all over him today."

"What are you talking about? He's been with me most of the day. You two are the ones all over Harry."

"We've had to be! You weren't on that date in Arizona, Mike. Niall somehow managed to get Harry alone, I know that was no accident. Except of course Louis had to be there, too. They're sneaky, just like Liam on your date. Didn't you say he got over an hour alone with Harry?"

"No," Mike replied. "Niall was with them."

"Exactly!" Dave yelled.

"They do this on purpose," Kevin said in exasperation. "They're probably all sleeping together as it is."

Niall felt Harry stiffen beside him and closed his eyes in frustration. They had just gotten Harry past that and now Kevin was bringing it back? Niall could have happily punched Kevin in that moment, but judging from the silence from Dave and Jared they too thought it was the case.

Mike rolled his eyes. "If that was happening, they wouldn't still be here. The producers would know it and kick them out."

"You're so naïve," Dave sneered. "That would just kick up ratings, the producers love that shit. You can't tell me those three don't make out at all. They're all over each other."

 _Shit. Shit shit shit._ "Harry-" Niall started, but Harry lifted a hand to silence him.

Nodding, Kevin added, "And Harry falls for their little acts every time. They keep it low-key around him and he gets wrapped around their little fingers, having no idea they're playing him so well."

Harry stepped forward then, the movement catching Mike's eye. He blinked at them in surprise, the other three falling silent as they too realized Harry and Niall had returned.

"Oh, don't stop on my account," Harry urged as he walked, Niall following more slowly. "I'd like to hear more about what an idiot I am, Kevin."

Immediately backtracking, Kevin tried, "Harry, I never said you're an idiot. I would never-"

"But you obviously believe I am, if you think I wouldn't see through something like that. You need to quit worrying about my relationships with everyone else and think about yours with me."

"I'm just trying to protect you, Harry. You don't see what we do, the way they're always together, the way Louis is always all over Liam-"

"That's just how Louis is," Niall argued, unable to keep quiet any longer. "He cares about everybody, he even defended Ryan the other day. If you were being unfairly attacked, he would do the same for you."

"Niall-" Harry started, intending to shut him up.

"I'm not going to stand here and let him insult my best friends!"

Harry's eyes cut over to Niall and he realized what a mistake he'd made-that stony expression was back on Harry's face, making Niall huff out a breath and walk toward the exit. He didn't know where he was going, only that he wanted to scream. And maybe punch Kevin and Dave, too.

Harry's next words stopped him. "We're ending this early today. Kevin and Dave, with me. Everyone else, I'll call and have a car sent for you guys. Thank you for the fun we did have."

He spun on his heel and approached Niall, who offered him apologetic eyes, but he only shot Niall one of his unreadable expressions and kept going, Dave and Kevin on his heels.

When they were gone, Niall sighed. "I'm sorry, guys. I didn't mean to ruin this date."

Mike shrugged. "It wasn't you, it was them. But... what Kevin said. A lot of the guys think that, you know. That you all... "

"Yeah. But we don't. We're all here for Harry, there's no question of that."

Mike nodded. "Ryan and I know that. I just hope Harry does, too."

With another sigh, Niall hoped for the same thing.

* * *

Huddled around the huge television (which of course had its signal disabled to keep the guys isolated) in the main suite, Liam, Louis, and Ryan looked up in surprise when Niall, Mike, and Jared entered. They wore matching frowns as Louis asked, "What's going on?" No date ever ended before dark.

"It didn't end well," Mike answered, joining Ryan on the couch as Jared headed into the kitchen to find the other guys. Ryan scooted over to make room and Niall took the vacated spot, Louis and Liam smashed into the loveseat together and the game they'd been playing forgotten.

"I'm shocked Kevin didn't come in and start raging at you two, saying it was somehow your fault," Niall commented, leaning back and closing his eyes.

"Our fault?" Liam questioned. "How would it be our fault, we weren't even there!"

"Oh, but you were in spirit," Mike countered, bringing a resigned chuckle out of Niall. The damage was done, it would be up to Harry to decide who to believe at this point.

Louis shook his head in confusion. "Kevin's not even here. He was with you guys."

"They're not here yet?" Mike asked. "They left way before us, there's no way we beat them here."

Niall's stomach turned over as he guessed what must have happened. "I bet he spent more time with them because they were feeling ignored. He does that. And they're probably filling his head with more lies about us."

"What the hell happened?" Liam asked in exasperation.

Mike fielded that question. "Dave and Kevin got upset when Niall and Harry left the theater together."

"We didn't leave together," Niall argued.

"Look," Mike said, holding up a hand. "I didn't say it in front of those guys, but they were right. There's no way that was a coincidence."

Cheeks flushing, Niall shrugged. "We didn't plan it."

"Either way, he left and then _you_ left and you were both gone for like fifteen minutes. I don't blame them for getting jealous, I was a little bit, too."

"But you still defended me?"

"Yes, because while I'm not naïve enough to believe you two weren't kissing somewhere, I don't think you're sleeping with these guys."

"What?" Louis exploded, shooting up off the loveseat. "He's not, we're not, I told Harry that, there's nothing between any of us!"

Ryan groaned, letting his head fall back onto the couch. "I keep telling Kevin he's wrong about that. Did he say something like that to Harry?"

"He said it to me," Mike answered, "but Harry and Niall heard it."

"I'm gonna kill that guy!" Liam yelled. "Where is he?" He stood up as if Kevin had somehow slipped past him, eyes roaming the room.

"He's not here, chill." Louis shook his head, though, livid. "I spent all that time making sure Harry knew better and that little shit undoes it all in one afternoon?"

"I tried to tell him," Ryan sighed. "He's been saying that since Arizona, since the rafting trip."

"Of course," Louis spat. "Because he was pissed when Harry made him switch places with Niall. I could tell he was mad."

"So what actually happened?" Liam queried. "You guys overheard what?"

"Well," Niall explained, "we went back to the theater and they were arguing. Harry stopped me because he wanted to hear what they were saying. And Kevin was going off, Dave too. Jared didn't really say anything, but I think he believes what they do. Mike defended us."

"Thanks, buddy!" Liam patted Mike's shoulder with a grin.

"I may be jealous of you guys, but I'm not stupid. The stuff he was saying was ludicrous. And he made the mistake of saying that Harry was... what was it, Niall? Being taken in?"

"Wrapped around our little fingers, I believe it was. And that we're playing him. Harry got pissed, you know how he gets."

Liam and Louis nodded, Ryan only frowning; apparently Ryan _didn't_ know that yet.

"He ended the date," Niall continued. "Took Dave and Kevin with him, sent the three of us home in a separate car."

"Except they apparently didn't come straight back like we did."

"Which could mean a lot of different things," Louis commented.

They all spun around as the hotel door clicked open, expecting Dave and Kevin but instead it was the man who randomly showed up to remove the luggage of those contestants who didn't survive the date. Their faces froze in shock when the man picked up two sets of luggage after checking the tags on them, and then he left with them.

"Holy shit," Mike breathed.

Everyone glanced around at each other, realizing that Dave and Kevin had been sent home. Nobody else could find words as they processed it, their minds working to figure out what that would mean at the rose ceremony. Would there only be one going home now?

The door opened yet again, surprising them, and this time it was Harry who stepped through with a smile for the small group. "Hey, guys."

"Hey," they chorused, still in shock and understanding more deeply than ever before that if Harry didn't want you here, he wouldn't hesitate to eliminate you.

"I'm sorry about the date getting cut short," he said to Niall and Mike.

Neither knew what to say, both nervous now. Louis, however, found his voice. "Harry, can I talk to you for a few minutes?"

"Sorry, Louis, I came to see Mike. Join me for a bit?" Harry held out an arm to Mike, who took it and followed him out of the suite.

Looking as if he'd been slapped in the face, Louis sat down hard on the loveseat. "Wow."

"I'm gonna kill those guys. They-oh. Wait. They're gone." Liam grinned. "Ha! That's what you get for spreading lies!"

Niall reached out to lay a hand on Ryan's shoulder. "He'll come back. Harry didn't seem pissed."

Neither Louis nor Liam had even noticed the terror in Ryan's eyes. Now he said, "What if he doesn't?"

"Then you have us," Liam replied. "You're pretty awesome, you can hang with us. Just don't go around saying shit behind our backs, that's not cool."

Ryan surrendered a tiny smile. "If you guys only knew how many times I've defended you. Everyone's jealous, we all think you guys will end up as the final three."

Niall smirked. "And we're afraid you'll win. Harry really likes you."

Ryan shrugged. "We get along well. Talk a lot. It's nice, you know? The other guys are always worried about kissing him and using sex, but any kind of relationship that's going to last has to have more than sex."

That shut all of them up, and they were lost in their own thoughts until Mike returned a few minutes later bearing a rose on his shirt.

"Wow," Louis repeated.

Ryan jumped up and hugged Mike tight, Mike laughing as he patted Ryan's back. "Careful, don't crush the rose."

Liam's eyes narrowed. "What's that you're holding, Mike?"

"Oh, this?" After Ryan backed off, Mike grinned. "Nothing special. Just the date card for tomorrow."

Everyone was up then, scrambling for it, but Mike held it high above his head. "Not until everyone's here. Guys!" he yelled. "The date card's here!"

The four remaining men rushed into the room, excited. Before Mike could open the envelope, though, Ryan said, "Guys. Dave and Kevin are gone."

"Gone?" Jared echoed. "What do you mean, gone?"

"He means," Louis replied, "that Harry sent them home. So whatever shit they stirred up today on your date pissed Harry off enough to get rid of them. And can I just take this opportunity to tell you guys that there is _nothing_ going on with the three of us?" No one answered, a few of them unable to meet Louis' eyes. "I know you all think that. Why is it so hard to believe we're just friends?"

"Because you guys act like more than friends," Austin said.

"How?" Liam questioned. "What do we do that's so... more than friends?"

Again no one answered, and Louis threw his hands up. "Fine. But I'm telling you right now, if I hear of anyone else spreading lies to Harry, it's on. You're fucking with my future here. Or theirs. Or even yours, because look what happened to Dave and Kevin. Remember that next time you want to spout your mouths off."

"Louis," Niall interrupted quietly, "they didn't say anything to him. Calm down."

"I don't want it to get to that point, Niall. We're all here for the same reason, to win Harry as a husband. Let's keep that in mind."

"Okay, Louis, we get it! Read the card, Mike!" Liam pushed.

Austin glared. "If one of you three or Ryan gets a second date before I even get a first one, I'm gonna be pissed."

There were nods around the room, but Niall didn't feel the others had anything to worry about. Even if Harry hadn't said he needed to spend more time with other guys, Niall thought damage had been done today, and he was excluded anyway since he'd been on the group date.

Mike whipped out the card inside the envelope and his face fell slightly. "'See if you can keep track of my heart before it races away. Louis.'"

The room exploded with anger, Louis' face showing shock after the way Harry had brushed him off earlier. Niall sighed and grabbed Louis' hand, pulling him out after a look at Liam, who of course followed. They returned to their room, hiding away from the backlash they knew would be coming.

Niall laid back on his bed, throwing an arm over his face.

"Man, those guys are pissed." Liam shook his head, settling onto Louis' bed and scooting over for Louis to join him. Once Louis had, Liam said, "So. Louis' got a date."

"Yeah. Really wasn't expecting that."

"You don't sound happy about it."

"I'm... a little scared. Not sure what he's thinking. You saw him earlier, he didn't even want to talk to me. I've never seen him turn down anyone who asked to speak to him."

"I haven't either," Niall agreed.

"That doesn't mean he's pissed," Liam reasoned. "You did get a date."

"Sure, but why? Is he going to eliminate me, too?"

Niall bit his lip. "He's probably going to grill you about us. I'm sure that before he sent them packing, he grilled Dave and Kevin plenty about what goes on."

"'See if you can keep track of my heart before it races away,'" Louis mused. "That sounds bad, like I'm losing whatever ground I had with him."

"Don't take that too literally," Niall argued, sitting up and rubbing his face. "Or... actually, _do_ take it literally. Remember that the cards have clues. I'd guess it's a race track."

"What? No way! I wanted the race car date!" Liam whined.

"Sorry, buddy." Louis hugged Liam against him, Liam's arms sliding around his waist and his head resting on Louis' chest.

"That's probably what they keep seeing," Niall commented. "You two do kind of act like a couple. I guess because I know better, I never really noticed."

"What, this?" Liam asked. "He's my buddy. Is it wrong to cuddle with a buddy?"

"Well... I don't know, I haven't had any buddies like you guys before."

Louis nodded in agreement. "I guess I can see why the guys would think that, but I've never had buddies like you, either. I don't even think about it, I just... when you're near I like to... I don't know."

"Cuddle," Liam supplied. "There's nothing wrong with it."

"Harry might not see it that way," Niall smirked. "He'd probably rage if he saw the two of you right now."

Liam held Louis tighter. "Let him. I already told you, he's not making me give you guys up."

"It's not like we do this in front of him," Louis said. "We're not stupid."

"I wonder if he saw you two in the cave."

Liam blinked a few times. "The cave?"

"Yes, Liam," Niall chuckled. "Remember Hawaii? In the dark when you were so scared? Wait, I _know_ he saw you, because you didn't let go of Louis for a while."

"I was scared! What was I supposed to do, suck it up and take it like a man?"

The other two giggled, Louis hugging Liam close. "You're so adorable."

"I'm serious! I would've held onto Harry like that if he'd been next to me, but he was up front with you, Niall! Louis was there, so he got the honor of dealing with me."

"Nice to know I'm second best," Louis teased.

"Oh be quiet, you know I love you. Now, Niall. Tell us what exactly happened today."

"Ugh," Niall groaned. "It was a disaster. I mean, it started out great, but... well, maybe not for everyone else."

"Where'd you go?" Louis asked.

"We stayed in the hotel. There are some self-guided tours about ancient Egypt, and he made me play tour guide for everyone. Luckily I know a lot about that stuff, so it wasn't hard."

"But you were the center of attention," Louis nodded, beginning to understand.

"Exactly. For two tours he had me stand up there and spout off my knowledge, and Mike and Jared seemed to actually enjoy it. Kevin wasn't too thrilled."

"I'm sure he wasn't. When did you two make out?"

"Liam, why do you assume we made out?"

"Because Mike said so, and also Louis said Harry likes to kiss you."

"Harry likes to kiss everyone."

"Niall," Louis interrupted. "Open books. Don't be ashamed or embarrassed by the fact that Harry is attracted to you. It's what we all want."

"Fine," Niall sighed. "We did the little tours, then we went into the IMAX theater. Harry arranged it so I would sit next to him."

"Whoa," Liam muttered. "No wonder the other guys were jealous."

"That part wasn't obvious, at least not to anyone else. What _was_ obvious is when he got up and left and I went after him. He kept hinting at it, wanted me to follow him, but I knew it would piss everyone off so I didn't go. At least not right away. I couldn't resist him, though. He makes me crazy."

Louis chuckled. "What happened then?"

"I got up and Kevin was pissed, asked me where I was going. I told him to take my seat if he was so worried about Harry's attention, and I left. Harry um... was in some sort of closet thing and when I walked by he pulled me in."

"Dude! You made out in a closet? That's so weird!"

"It wasn't weird, Liam, it was... " Niall sighed, not finding words to describe it. "Okay, maybe it was a little weird. But we made out for a few minutes and then we got into another fight."

Louis raised an eyebrow. "You guys argued _again_?"

"Yep. Seems like we can't ever be alone without it coming to that eventually."

"What the hell do you guys fight about, Niall?" Liam asked in disbelief. "I never fight with him."

"Today it was about... well, I'm not sure, really. Partly about the three of us, he still won't tell me why it bothers him so much that we're close. It might be jealousy, or it might have to do with having to see us all when this is over. But he won't tell me. And then he exploded, said he has no one to talk to and that he has to keep everything bottled up and he misses Lou."

Once again, Louis nodded. "He really doesn't have anyone to talk to. We've got each other, and even the rest of the guys have someone they're close to. But Harry has no one, and on our date in San Francisco I told him if he needed someone to talk to, I'm here."

Liam's gaze met Niall's. "He needs someone to talk to."

"Yes," Niall agreed, though it hurt realizing Harry couldn't talk to him but could apparently talk to Louis. "I'm not saying that's the only reason you got the date, Louis, but I'm sure he needs that from you. Especially after today."

"But he can't say much to me. He can tell me how hard this is for him and all the stuff he must have said to you, Niall, but really there's not a lot he can vent about."

"Still," Liam argued, "you're someone he can lean on. You're very good at being that."

Glancing down at Liam's body wrapped around him, Louis grinned. "Obviously."

Liam smiled up at Louis, and Niall's eyes narrowed. "You know... I really do see it. What the other guys do. I'd never noticed it much before, but the two of you... "

"What?" Liam questioned, gaze returning to Niall.

"You honestly do act like a couple. I know better, but no one else does, so of course they're going to assume. Just watch yourselves around Harry."

"I always do," Louis replied. "He's jealous enough as it is."

"Do you think he's jealous of us?" Liam asked suddenly.

"That's what I just said," Niall answered.

"No, I don't mean Louis and me. I mean the three of us. Because we're so close and he has nobody. Do you think that makes him... I don't know. Feel left out or something?"

Louis and Niall stared at each other as it clicked into place. "Of course," Niall replied. "How did I miss that?"

"And once again, Liam surprises us by going deep. Nice job, buddy."

They bumped fists before Liam's arms returned to cuddle around Louis' waist. "It only makes sense, right?"

"It absolutely does," Niall nodded. "So he sees how close we all are and... what? Wants to be a a part of it?"

"He kind of was in Hawaii. When we were sitting around the fire at the luau, he looked so happy."

Louis agreed. "Ryan was there, too, but still. I kind of got the feeling that was like... a dream date for him. His favorite people all together."

"That may be, but he still doesn't touch Ryan," Liam argued.

"He's hardly seen Ryan since the date."

"I know, Niall, but if you think about it, Ryan has no problem touching other people," Liam reasoned. "Look at him with Mike today. So that means it's Harry who has the problem."

"Except Harry can't keep his hands off us," Louis grinned. "I love that about him."

"Did you hear what Ryan said earlier, though? They talk. A lot. Sounds like that's pretty much all they do."

"Sucks for Ryan," Liam laughed. "He's missing out on some steamy stuff. Harry is... wow."

"Yes," Niall smiled. "Wow."

"And you get a whole date with him tomorrow!" Liam exclaimed, referring to Louis. "Lucky dog!"

"We'll see. He could easily send me home when it's done."

"You're not going anywhere," Liam said in dismissal. "He loves you too much."

"It _will_ be nice to have him to myself again. It's been a long time."

"Okay, I'm gonna go call Nola before it gets too late." Niall stood up. "You two just keep cuddling over there. You know, this will air eventually. Harry will see this at some point."

"I've got nothing to hide," Liam shrugged. "You hear that, Harry?" He looked up and around, searching for the camera they knew had been put in for their stay. "We're just friends who like to cuddle! Nothing wrong with that!"

"As long as you don't try to kiss me or anything," Louis teased. "Don't you sabotage me, I still have Joanie hidden somewhere."

"I'm gonna find her, Louis! She'd better be safe when I do! If you popped her-"

"Relax. She's perfectly safe. But she misses you, so you'd better behave if you want her back."

Shaking his head over their silliness, Niall let the door close behind him to shut off their conversation. He hadn't mentioned it to either of them, of course, but he was now terrified again.

If anyone had a chance at stealing Harry's focus away, it was Louis.


	16. Chapter 16

Louis was awoken by someone shaking his shoulder. He blinked up in the dark and tried to shield his eyes from the flashlight's beam. "Get up," Harry's voice whispered down to him, and for a moment he thought he was dreaming, but then the voice added, "You have fifteen minutes. Meet you in the lobby."

As if it really had been a dream, the light was suddenly gone and Louis was alone in the dark, rising to sit up in his bed. He rubbed his eyes and once they were adjusted he could make out Niall sleeping soundly to his right, Liam's arms wrapped around Alex P. Keaton to his left. How had they not heard anything?

Harry was sneaky when he wanted to be. It would be a good idea for Louis to remember that.

Without waking the other two, Louis rose and got dressed, throwing on a t-shirt and jeans along with his sneakers. He did a quick face wash, grabbed his jacket, and set his luggage in the main suite before taking the elevator down to the lobby, which was surprisingly crowded considering it wasn't even 4 A.M. Then again, this was Vegas.

Harry waited in one of the lobby's plush chairs, standing to stretch when he saw Louis. As he'd dressed casually as well, Louis was relieved he hadn't bothered to don fancier clothing.

"Coffee?" Harry asked, passing over a ready-made cup that Louis took gladly.

"Thanks. Why are we up so early?"

"This is our date."

"I figured that much, Harry. Where are we going?"

"You'll see." Harry grabbed his hand and pulled him toward the entrance, Rich in tow as always.

They were squeezed into the backseat of a waiting car, Louis using it as an excuse to scoot closer to Harry. How did he look and smell so amazing in the middle of the night?

When Harry smiled and lifted an arm to pull Louis closer, Louis relaxed. He didn't seem angry or hostile, so maybe the previous day's disaster hadn't ruined anything. Louis snuggled in against Harry's side, having missed the opportunity to do this, to simply have Harry to himself.

"Sleep well?" Harry asked.

"Not really. I was worried about today."

"No need to worry. Just relax and enjoy the time we have."

Sipping his coffee, Louis said, "You pissed off a lot of guys by choosing me again."

"I know. I'm sorry about that, but I missed you. And I have to focus on my future. I'm not sure of it completely, but I do know some things. Now is the time to cement my decisions, make sure I'm on the right track."

Louis' breath caught. Was Harry saying he was the "right track"?

"I wasn't sure where we stood after yesterday," Louis said hesitantly. "I know some things were said and-"

"Louis, I know it's not true. I've talked to you and Niall enough to know better, and based on things you've both said I'm aware there's nothing physical between you."

"Thank god," Louis sighed. He set his cup in a holder before him and cuddled in closer, enjoying the feel of Harry's arm around him.

"Rest, we've got a bit of a drive."

Before closing his eyes, Louis lifted his face to Harry, needing to know they were still the same. Harry smiled and dipped his lips down for a soft kiss, nipping at Louis' before pulling back, and Louis somehow managed to calm the burn that simple kiss had brought about in his body.

* * *

When he next opened his eyes it was to see Harry dozing, arms around him as the car climbed a windy road taking them high up onto a mountain. His watch told him it was only about an hour later, and at 5 A.M. the sun had still not risen. Harry shifted at Louis' movement, smiling down at him.

"Where are we?" Louis asked.

"Mount Charleston. I thought it would be nice to watch the sunrise with you as we had breakfast."

_Oh my god, why do you have to do this? Why do you have to give me what I've always wanted in a man?_

"Is that okay?" Harry asked when Louis didn't reply.

"It's... perfect. Sounds perfect."

"Good." Harry kissed the side of Louis' head before moving away some to stretch as well as he could in the car.

A picnic was set up and waiting for them, Louis smiling a thank you to the few staff members who had gotten up so early to accommodate them, but of course it was their jobs. Louis and Harry took seats on the blanket, digging for food now that they'd been awake long enough to be hungry.

It was a good ten minutes before either of them spoke, shoving their faces while smiling at each other occasionally, and Louis broke the silence by saying, "This is awesome. Thank you, Harry."

"It is pretty amazing. Look at the sky, all the colors. I feel close to the sun up here."

"Even more than in the helicopter?"

"Yeah, actually. Because here I feel like I can just reach out and touch it. You can't in a helicopter."

"I bet you can in a hot air balloon."

Harry tilted his head, an eyebrow raised at Louis. "Am I sensing some jealousy, Louis?"

"No. I'm sorry, I don't know where that came from."

"I know it's not easy sharing me. We've had this discussion."

"I know. It's just... "

"Hard," Harry finished.

"Yeah."

"Let's not make this any harder than it needs to be. Tell me about your family. Your sisters and your mom."

"Really? Uh... okay. My mom is just... Mom. She's kind, accepting of everyone, and does whatever she has to in order for us to live our dreams. She's funny, treats my friends like her own kids. If you get to meet her, that's how I'll introduce you to her, I'll just say 'This is Mom.' In school I would have friends for a while, and they'd move or for whatever reason we didn't keep in touch anymore, and like a year later Mom would ask, 'How's so-and-so, have you heard from him lately?' She gets attached."

Harry grinned. "That's great. My mom's the opposite. Then again, I never really had any guy friends."

"Did you have female friends?"

"Here and there, but mostly I just had girlfriends. Lou's the first real friend I ever had in life. How about your sisters?"

"Well there's Lottie. She's... " Louis could only laugh. "How to describe Lottie? She's the opposite of my mom, suspects everyone's up to no good. You have to prove yourself to her before she'll let you into the family. I felt bad for my stepdad in the beginning, she was so sneaky! She followed him around everywhere and wanted to make sure he was really as nice as he seemed to be. Because she kept saying 'Nobody can be that nice.' But he is, he's a great guy, and my mom's really happy with him."

"How old is Lottie?"

"She's uh... seventeen? Eighteen? I'm horrible with that. It doesn't really matter, though, because she's always acted at least five years older than her actual age."

"Should I be afraid of this girl?" Harry smirked, only half-joking.

"Probably, yes," Louis laughed. "Mom's going to freak out, she thinks you're hot."

"Well, I am. Lottie doesn't think so?"

"Um... I think the only time I've ever heard her really say anything about you was when I was home for Christmas last year. Mom had on one of those entertainment shows and there was a feature about you, and Mom just kept saying, 'He's so handsome.' Lottie was like 'Nobody's that handsome, Mom. It's all the T.V., I bet in person he's really not that hot.' The twins seem to like you though. Pheobe and Daisy."

Harry giggled before asking, "And now that you've seen me in person? Am I really that hot?"

"Yes," Louis answered. "Even hotter than you look on T.V."

"Good to know."

They smiled at each other as the tension rose between them, Louis wondering how he wasn't jumping Harry at this point, but Harry distracted him with the sunrise. "There are so many colors all at once. How is it so amazing?"

Louis shook his head, at a loss to describe it. He refilled his coffee, which he'd drained while eating, and then scooted closer to Harry when Harry lifted an arm in invitation. Settling in next to him, Louis said, "Tell me about Lou. How did you meet her?"

"She worked with my mom when I went to work there after high school. She did the make-up and hair for the models who sat for photo shoots. Like when a new product came out, we'd have to do magazine spots and commercials? She worked on that end of it. She's really good at her job."

"Obviously, since you always look amazing. Is it hard, not having her here to prep you every day?"

"I don't get prepped when I'm not working, Louis. The way you see me now is how I usually am."

"Come on, when you leave your house she doesn't even touch you up at all?"

"Nope. Not unless we're going to a job. You get tired of all the make-up and stuff after a while. And if you're wondering why my hair always looks so good, it's because I taught myself how to do it years ago. I know everything there is to know about hair care products and how to use them. We could do some fun things with you if you'd let me."

"No, that's okay," Louis laughed, holding up his hands. "My hair's a sweaty mess most of the time anyway."

"True. Do you miss it? How's your injury?"

"Much better. It bothered me a little in Hawaii, when we were climbing through that cave, but mostly it's fine."

"You should've said something, we could have stopped to rest."

"It was fine, Harry. I would have if I'd needed to stop."

"Liar."

Louis didn't reply to that, instead saying, "So how did you and Lou become friends? Just seeing each other at work every day?"

"Yeah, pretty much. She's a few years older than me, and she's like a big sister. Took me under her wing, taught me all kinds of stuff about make-up and how to create certain looks. We worked together on the men's line of hair stuff, even impressed Mom. And when I started getting more and more modeling jobs, because I'd been doing some here and there but when it got to the point where I couldn't work anymore because I was doing so many gigs, I kept calling Lou for advice. Eventually she quit to travel with me and I shared the money I'd get, and together we'd kind of travel the world. It was fun, she's a wonderful person."

"And you two never had romantic feelings for each other?"

"No, and I'm not sure if that's weird or not. We're close, I'm closer to her than I ever was to any guy or girl I dated, but we kind of... somehow skipped that flirtatious dating stage. Went right from acquaintances to best pals. She always knows what I'm thinking, even before I do."

Louis smirked.

"What?"

"Nothing, I was just thinking that you pretty much described me and Niall right there. In a very short time, we've become best pals and I can usually tell what he's thinking."

"That's saying something, considering he's a genius."

Louis nodded, grinning, but then he said softly, "It must be hard, being away from Lou and having no one to talk to."

Rather than agreeing, Harry's face turned to stone, and Louis knew he'd said the wrong thing. _Shit._

"Of course Niall told you everything we talked about. That's the problem with you guys, I can't say something to one of you without it becoming a group discussion."

"Harry, he was just explaining what happened on the date-"

"Bullshit. He didn't have to tell you everything. I'm sure you know all about the fight we had, right?"

Unable to lie, Louis sighed and looked away.

"When I say something to you or to Liam or to Niall, it's something I'm comfortable sharing with you and maybe not with the others. With most of the guys, I feel like maybe once this contest is over and we get away from it all, things would be different and with the pressure off, we can focus on each other and not the damn prize at the end. With you three, though, that's not the case—if I choose one of you, I get all of you."

"Is that a problem? I thought you liked all of us."

"I do! You guys are fucking amazing, all three of you, and it's hard enough having to choose! But it would never be just me and one of you. I'd have to see the other two and know I turned them down, know I broke their hearts. And it would cause problems between all you guys, and that's the last thing I ever want to do. You've found this perfect friendship and I don't want to ruin that, I don't want to come between you guys."

"Did it ever occur to you, Harry, that you might end up being part of this 'perfect friendship' we have? That you might just fit right in? We're all fully aware that only one of us can win. We've made our peace with that and agreed not to let it ruin us. We support each other, boost each other up before dates, we cheer for each other."

"How the fuck is that even possible? Don't you get that if they win, you lose? Doesn't that even matter to you, that you might not get me?"

"Of course it matters to us! Look, I won't lie, Harry. There were some random feelings in the beginning between the three of us. There was flirting, and one night in particular it was really hard to keep our hands off each other. But nothing happened, and it's because all of us want _you_. We've moved past that, our focus is on you and not each other, and any feelings there might have been between the three of us are nothing in comparison to what each of us feels for you. It's you we want, Harry, you we came here for and _you_ that we talk about. Because we're all head over heels for you and it's so damn hard, if we didn't have each other to talk to we would've gone crazy by now. I guarantee Niall wouldn't still be here. We've talked him out of leaving on more than one occasion. Liam would be okay, but now that things are getting more intense I worry for him and his big mouth. And if it wasn't for them, I would've been gone the first night. I only stayed because I didn't want them to suffer alone. My reasons for staying have changed, I'm here for you now, and even though we all lean on each other and keep each other sane, it's you we're still here for. Not each other."

Harry allowed the words to sink in, thinking them over before saying, "Yesterday, Niall was more concerned for your feelings than mine. I wanted him to stay out of the argument but he said he wouldn't stand by and let others insult you guys. That bothered me."

Louis sighed. "We probably all would've said that, Harry. But it doesn't mean we don't care about your feelings or love you. It's just... I don't know. We're like brothers now, I guess. Defend each other to the death."

"And where does that leave me?"

"As one of us, if you're willing to be. Yeah, it might be tough in the beginning to see you with Niall or Liam and know what I'm missing, but I'll get over it eventually. So would they. Our friendship is worth that. And we all agreed, you fit right in. Think about it that way, Harry. If you choose one of us, you get us all. You just... only get to marry one. The other two have to move on and find new guys to love, but I think we all feel that if those guys don't fit in with the group, it's not gonna happen. And we won't live together or anything, we'd only get together when our jobs allowed us to. Probably wherever Niall is, because he'll be settled somewhere with Nola."

Harry stood up suddenly. "We need to get going, we have a date with a race track."

"Harry, don't. Talk to me."

"We've said what there is to say. I need time to process it, but in the meantime I'm going to kick your ass on the race track. Ever driven a Nascar?"

Louis forced a smile, knowing the discussion was over. "No, but Liam really wanted to do that. He's very jealous of my date. One day we'll all go back and do it together."

Unsure how Harry would take that, Louis was relieved to see him grin. "Deal. How did he know that's where we were going?"

"Niall. He's figured out almost all the date cards for us. Genius, you know."

Harry chuckled. "Damn him. I wonder what he made of his?"

"The 'surprise me' one? Yeah, I think that scared him. For the first time, he had no idea what to expect. It was pretty awesome."

"It's great when you can stump a genius. Come on." Harry helped Louis up, pulling him into a sudden kiss that had him clinging to Harry and left him dizzy when it was over. "Save some of that aggression for the track. I'm so gonna kick your ass."

"Money where your mouth is, Harry."

Harry winked before pulling Louis toward the car, and neither noticed much scenery on the drive back to town because they were too focused on each other.

* * *

By the time they arrived at the track, their bodies were humming with the adrenaline that had built as they lost themselves in each other yet were forced to hold back. Both were more than ready to let out the pent-up aggression on a race track, but unfortunately had to sit through a class detailing the basics of safety and explaining how driving a Nascar differed from driving a normal car.

Afterward they were suited up in racing gear, the two of them appraising each other and liking what they saw. "You look hot," Harry smirked, then dragged Louis out to the track where two cars and a team waited for them.

"You ready to lose?" Harry challenged, settling a helmet over his head.

"Eat my dust," Louis replied, then snickered at how cheesy they were. Harry giggled as well, Louis hearing it through the headset built into the helmet. "Can anyone else hear us?"

A chorus of "yes" echoed through their helmets and then Louis remembered the instructor mentioning they would be in constant contact with not only each other but a few crew members who would talk them through the race.

"Damn," Louis smirked. "I wanted to talk dirty to you, try to throw off your concentration."

"Not gonna work, Tomlinson. Strap in and shut up."

Rather than insult Louis it only turned him on more, heat passing between them before they got settled in their designated cars.

It certainly wasn't a full-blown race, but it was close enough for them as they maneuvered around each other, calling out insults every time one managed to pass the other. Neither had ever driven anything so fast, and the rush was intense.

It was Louis who was declared the winner, but only barely, as they crossed the finish line on their final lap. He climbed out of the car grinning hugely, ready to gloat about it but when Harry stepped out of his own and quickly removed the helmet before tossing it on the seat, Louis feared he'd royally pissed Harry off. Had Harry truly expected Louis to let him win?

Harry's eyes were so dark they were almost green as they met Louis', his fingers working to unfasten Louis' helmet and toss it aside, and when Louis opened his mouth to ask what was wrong, he never got a chance to speak; Harry's tongue was down his throat and he was shoved up against his car before the words could even leave his mouth.

Taken aback only momentarily, Louis returned the kiss just as hungrily, their hands attempting to rip at the suits because there simply wasn't enough skin. Harry's fingers dug into him, his hips pinning Louis to the car while he whined in frustration, unable to find his way into Louis' suit.

"Guys! Hey! Break it up!"

A few loud claps from a staff worker managed to get through Harry's brain, Louis practically growling when he felt Harry backing off. Why couldn't they just _do_ this already? Who really cared? "No," he whispered, trying to keep Harry there with his fingers latching onto Harry's clothing.

"We have to," Harry rasped, finally pushing himself back and away but obviously unhappy about it as they stood there panting. "I lost control, I won't let that happen again."

"Don't apologize, please. I felt it, too."

"I'm aware of that. I felt enough of you to know that," he smirked. "I'm so hot, Louis." When Louis rolled his eyes, Harry clarified, "No, I don't mean it that way. I mean physically, I'm burning up. These suits are hot and I'm so turned on that... we need to get out of here."

Louis smiled, agreeing. "But just so you know, if we do end up married, we're buying cars and building our own track so we can do this whenever we want. And not have to worry about stopping when we get carried away."

"God, yes," Harry nodded, taking Louis' hand as they went back toward the main building.

"How did that guy know we're not supposed to have sex?" Louis wanted to know. "The one who stopped us."

"I doubt he did," Harry laughed. "I think he just didn't really want to witness us going at it on the race track in front of everyone."

"Oh." Blushing, Louis slid up against Harry's side and wrapped his arms around Harry, who pulled him in close.

"If anyone here is hot to look at, it's you," Harry whispered, his fingers moving up into Louis' hair.

Face flushing a deeper red, Louis said, "Thank you. I think we're even on that." When he glanced up into Harry's eyes, he saw a multitude of things Harry wanted to say but couldn't. He nodded anyway, letting Harry know that he understood.

He wasn't going anywhere anytime soon.

* * *

"Better now?" Louis asked as they were herded back into their car.

"Much. That suit really was like an oven."

"Yeah, it was. But that was so intense! We gotta bring the guys out to do this. Though I'm not sure Niall would do it."

"Oh, I think he would," Harry smiled.

"Really? He was so scared on the raft."

"I think there's a side to Niall you have yet to see. Or... well, no, you probably never will. My point is that he has an aggressive side. Trust me."

Assaulted with visions of Harry and Niall kissing on that trail in Arizona, Louis merely nodded.

"I'm sorry." Harry reached out to link fingers with Louis. "I was just saying that he'd probably do it."

"I know."

They were quiet for a few miles until Louis stated, "You know, Harry, there's something I want to make sure you understand. About all of us."

"What's that?"

"If none of us win, if you were to choose Ryan or Mike or anyone else, you'd still be welcome as our friend. We all really enjoy being with you, and not just in a romantic sense."

Harry's eyelids fluttered rapidly as he was overcome with emotion and had to look away. Louis squeezed his hand. "I mean it. We didn't come here expecting to make friends, but it happened. None of us want to lose that."

"Sometimes," Harry said softly, "I think it would be easiest if I did choose one of them. It wouldn't cause problems for you guys, then."

"We're mature people, Harry. Even Liam," he grinned. "We can handle it. It'll be hard seeing you with someone else, but we're all prepared for that. And we are all of the belief that if it's meant to be, it will. Not all of us are meant to be with you; maybe none of us are. But if it's meant to be... "

"It will," Harry finished.

"Exactly. Having said that, I'd love you forever if you chose me." Louis winked, and Harry laughed.

"Got it." He kissed Louis' cheek, then pulled Louis' head down to rest on his shoulder.

"So what's next on our date?"

"I thought we'd walk the Strip a little bit, check out the hotels. Or have you done that a million times?"

"No, not really."

"We were supposed to play a charity poker game yesterday, but that didn't work out when everything went to hell."

"I wouldn't mind that. Except that I suck at poker."

"Do you?" Harry mused.

"I do. I can't hide my emotions to save my life."

"I can see that about you. I'm a master."

"And I can see _that_ about _you_. How about we stick to some slots for a while, just have some fun with it?"

"I'm good with that. And then we're having dinner in Paris."

"Seriously?" Louis sat up fast, eyes wide. "You're flying me to Paris?"

"No plane necessary." Harry pointed out the window of the car, where the Eiffel Tower could be seen in the distance. "It's just a replica, but we get to ride up in it and have dinner."

"Oh. That's just as good."

They grinned at each other again, Louis unable to resist leaning in for a kiss that Harry met eagerly. When the car rolled to a stop they parted reluctantly, though Harry kept Louis' hand in his as they exited. "Let's go be tourists for a while."

It sounded like heaven to Louis, and for a few hours they lost themselves among the crowd as well as they could with a camera crew trailing them.

* * *

The view from the top of the tower took Louis' breath away, so many colorful lights on all sides that he didn't know where to look first. Harry hugged him from behind, chin on his shoulder, and for a long time they stared out over the city in contented silence.

"I'm not going to get another date with you before you come home to meet my family, am I?"

"Can't answer that, Louis," Harry replied.

"I know," Louis sighed.

"But I can do this for you." He reached into his pocket and came out with the rose, Louis' face brightening when he caught sight of it. "Will you accept this rose?"

"You know I will." Louis spun around to allow Harry to fasten it on him, then smiled when Harry kissed him lightly. "Can't we make this date an overnighter?"

"You and Liam, I swear," Harry smirked. "Such horndogs."

"You're the one assuming it's about sex. Maybe I just want to hold you all night."

Harry lifted an eyebrow. "You and I both know that would last about five minutes. If that."

Shrugging, Louis replied, "It's not my fault you're so hot.'

"Ah, Louis." Harry hugged him tight, Louis sensing in the touch that Harry wanted it as badly as he did. "All in good time."

"So you're saying that's definitely going to happen for us?"

"I'm not saying anything. If it's meant to be, it will be, right?"

"Yeah. I just wish it was meant to be _now_ instead of weeks later."

"It helps, you know. What you said."

Louis frowned and stepped back. "I've said a lot of things today, Harry. Which thing are you referring to?"

"You letting me know that no matter what, I wouldn't lose you guys. It's been weighing heavy on my mind, the idea that by choosing one of you I alienate the others. Of course coming into this there was never a problem with that, I had no idea I'd end up meeting more than one person I'd want to keep in touch with. And until the show airs, we're not going to be able to see each other anyway. That's going to be the longest few months of my life, no matter who I choose."

"They don't allow you to see your chosen one?"

"They do, but we have to be extremely discreet. Do everything in private and sneak around, and you can't take a chance that someone will see you together. It's hard. I've talked to a few other Bachelors, gotten some insight about all of that. The few months between this and when the show airs is the toughest part of the whole thing. You've found someone you love, you want to show the world, and you can't. You have to treat it like some dirty secret. I hate that. I'm not the kind of person who's ashamed of my friends or my choices."

"Neither am I. But we agreed to it when we signed on for the show."

"I know. Doesn't mean I have to like it."

"There are a lot of things about this experience I don't like," Louis agreed. "But... finding the man who makes me happy, who gives me what I need... that makes it all worth it."

Harry nodded slowly. "I completely agree. And I hate that I'm breaking hearts to find that."

"It's the way the game is played, Harry. Don't hate the player-"

Harry cracked up suddenly, ending the phrase. "-hate the game. Yeah, this is not a fun game at all."

"I don't know, I think some moments are fun." Louis linked their fingers, forcing Harry to close the distance with a hard tug. "I think we can have a lot of fun together."

"Don't I wish," Harry whispered, and then they were off again, ignoring the view in favor of discovering each other instead, Louis grateful the tower had been closed to the public for the night. They took advantage of the time alone, spending minutes that turned into what seemed an eternity of kisses and caresses, Harry finally shoving Louis away roughly with a groan of frustration. "Fuck. I hate this. Let's go have dinner."

Louis nodded, attempting to catch his breath. "It's a damn good thing you have willpower, because I sure as well wouldn't have stopped."

"I have to. I always know when to stop."

"Too bad."

Harry chuckled, and as they headed down a few flights to the restaurant, Louis wished the night would never end.

* * *

It was a romantic dinner like before—gorgeous view, incredible food, and Harry an attentive date. This time, however, Louis was a more active participant, hardly able to look away from Harry and receptive to each advance. They held hands whenever they were able, staring at each other with infatuated grins in between conversation, and talked of their common interests while enjoying a fantastic meal. After making their way through an entire bottle of wine, Harry requested a second one and Louis smirked.

"Trying to make me drunk enough to sleep with you, Harry? Guess what? I don't have to be drunk for that."

"I think you're already drunk, you lush," Harry teased.

"Not even close. Just... relaxed. And happy."

Harry nodded, communicating silently that he was the same. "Tell me what our life would be like together. Let's say you win, I choose you and ask you to marry me and we decide that this is it, this is everything we've ever wanted."

"I imagine our life together would be amazing."

"Give me specifics. Where would we live, what would we do?"

"Uh... well, I could live anywhere really, but I'd spend most of my time in San Jose as long as I'm with them. And if I get traded, I'll go where they send me. You'll be traveling a lot, right?"

"I'm not so sure about that. I'll travel occasionally, but I'm ready to settle down somewhere, I think. I like the house I live in now, but I'd be willing to move. As long as I can bring Fame with me."

"So we could get a big house with a stable and live there, and I'd just be there whenever I could. Which would be often if we live in San Jose. If it's in L.A. somewhere, we probably wouldn't see much of each other during the soccer season."

"And how do you feel about that? Would it bother you?"

Louis shrugged, watching Harry refill their wine glasses and wondering what he was thinking; Harry was back in "unreadable" mode. "Not really, I'm used to it. Any time I got to spend with you would be something to cherish."

"We'd get you a horse, too. Just so you know."

"Dude, I really don't like horses."

"You'd probably learn to eventually."

"Probably. If it's important to you that I have a horse and ride it, I'd do my best."

"You'd enjoy it after a while. It's peaceful, just getting out on a horse and riding away from the world for a few hours."

Louis sipped his wine, wondering again what Harry was thinking. Was this something that could decide his fate with Harry, his dislike of horses?

"I don't expect you to change for me, Louis."

The words surprised him, almost as if Harry had been able to read his thoughts. "I didn't think you did."

"I just want you to understand that while I'm looking for someone to spend my life with, I wouldn't expect you to give up your own. I would never take soccer from you."

"I know you wouldn't. And if you tried, you'd fail. It's what I do."

"I get that. I have the same passion for my career. Just because I'll be doing less modeling, that doesn't mean I won't love it when do it. And I'll miss it when I don't."

"Then why not keep doing it? Why cut back on the modeling if it makes you so happy?"

"Because it's not enough anymore. It's my passion, but my passion is... I don't know. It's just different now. I want more. How do you feel about kids?"

Louis sat back in his chair, breath leaving him in a rush. "Kids?" he asked weakly.

"Yeah. I'm not saying I want them, I'm just asking what you think of them. Is that something you could see yourself doing someday? Being a father?"

"I... " Remembering his conversation with Niall, Louis had to be honest. "Not right now, no. I'd be a horrible father, always away from home. I don't know how I'll feel ten years from now, or even five. I only know that right now it's not something I want."

Harry absorbed that, eyes on the table as he drank his wine.

"What about you? Think you're ready for kids, Harry?"

"We're not talking about me."

"We need to. How am I supposed to know if you're what I'm looking for if you won't even tell me that much?"

"I've already told you, Louis, I don't know what I want right now. I'm weighing my options, trying to find the right fit for me."

"And you haven't yet?" Harry's eyes cut away once again, frustrating Louis into a sigh. "Look, I get that you can't give me any hints about who you're leaning toward, but I have the right to ask questions about your future and what you want. That affects me, too."

"I know it does. But I'm being honest when I tell you that I don't know what I want. That's the difference between you and me. And me and Liam, and me and Niall, and me and everyone else. You guys all know what you want, have your futures planned out. I did until recently, when I realized that what I had wasn't enough anymore."

"I went through the same thing, Harry. I have my career for now, but when that's over I'm going to be lost. I don't want to end up alone."

"Neither do I. I never cared before, but now the idea scares the shit out of me."

"Me, too. With me you won't ever be alone, I can promise you that."

"Except when soccer season is on."

"Who says you can't travel with me? We've got the money for that."

"And then what of Fame? I'd still never see him."

Louis shrugged, not having an answer for that.

"I guess what I'm learning more than anything else from this experience is that no matter who I choose, compromises will have to be made."

"But that's not just this experience, Harry. That's the way love and relationships work—compromise is what keeps it working."

"I guess. I've also learned that when you work hard to maintain an image, people assume things about you that might not be true."

Louis nodded, hoping Harry wasn't about to go off again regarding the way they'd made assumptions about him. Instead Harry stood and said, "Will you dance with me?"

"What? Dance?"

A small band had somehow appeared on a tiny stage Louis hadn't even noticed until Harry gestured toward it, and when Harry gave a signal they started playing. "I know you don't dance, but... for me? That whole compromise thing?"

It was music with no words, something slow and wistful that had Louis envisioning every romance movie he'd ever seen, and when Harry swept him up into his arms Louis was in awe. He was a horrible dancer, had always embarrassed himself at school dances and shied away from it at the weddings he'd attended, but Harry had a way of swinging him around as if he was lighter than air, communicating silently when he should move and how. They didn't do much more than sway with a few random turns that Harry would surprise him with, chuckling each time Louis clung to him in fear, but it was more dancing than Louis had ever willingly participated in.

"Relax, Louis. I got you. Let me sweep you off your feet."

He wanted to, he tried to relax and let Harry distract him, and for about five seconds at a time Harry was able to. Otherwise, he couldn't seem to give up control, and after two songs Harry lowered his arms and sighed at Louis. "You're so afraid of dancing. Why?"

"I'm not afraid, I just don't do it well."

"You're a master on the pitch, why can't you move gracefully off it?"

"I don't know, I'm just not comfortable. I've always been like this. I'm sorry."

"Aww, don't be sorry. I'm not upset, I just wonder how anyone can resist music like that. You need to learn to let it take you away, lose yourself in it so that all that exists is you and the man you're dancing with. Let go, Louis."

"I'm trying."

"One more song? Just close your eyes and give in?"

"Okay. I can do this."

"I know you can. Close your eyes."

Louis did after taking a deep breath, and when a new song started he allowed Harry to move him across the floor, or at least a few steps away. He tried to relax, Harry's lips finding his and helping a bit as he focused on that and allowed Harry to move him, but halfway through Harry shook his head with a resigned smile. "This isn't working. Dancing is just one of those things you don't do."

"I tried to tell you."

"It's okay," Harry laughed, hugging Louis to him. "I still love you."

The words were said without the intensity Louis had imagined hearing them with, more like something one friend would say to another, but still his heart skipped a beat. He tilted his face up for a deep kiss, able to lose himself in this as he wasn't a dance, and after a few minutes Harry stepped back. "It's time to get you back. But we can finish this in the car, if you'd like."

"I would."

The ride back to the Luxor passed in a blur just as their helicopter ride had weeks before. Harry left him breathless, always wanting more, and when the car stopped in front of the massive pyramid he sighed in frustration. "I hate having to give you up at the end of the date. I don't want to share you anymore, Harry."

Harry only smiled, kissing Louis once more before reaching across him to open the door. "Go. I don't want to get anywhere near your room because I might decide to stay all night."

"That's fine. We can kick Niall and Liam out."

Harry giggled, shoving Louis. "Go. I'll see you tomorrow night at the party, okay?"

"Is Liam getting the date tomorrow?"

"Goodnight, Louis. Sweet dreams."

"Night." He kissed Harry once again, then closed the door with another sigh.

Maybe one day he wouldn't have to do this, and they'd fall into bed together to finish what they seemed to start each time they were alone. Just once he wanted to know what it felt like to fall asleep in Harry's arms.

* * *

Their room was empty, but Louis knew Niall and Liam would be waiting for a report. He entered the main suite, finding some of the guys gathered around the television and making his way to the kitchen area, where he found Liam, Niall, Ryan, and Mike playing a game of cards. "Hey guys," he smiled, then almost fell over when he was tackled by Liam.

"Louis! Oh my god, you're back! You came back!"

"Of course I came back," Louis laughed, hugging Liam to him. "Where would I go?"

"How about home?" Niall replied. "After the way Harry treated you yesterday, we were half afraid you two would end up arguing and you'd do that stupid 'Just send me home' crap again."

Ryan and Mike gaped. "You actually said that to him, Louis?" Mike asked.

"I did once, yeah. He was being a dick."

"How are you still here?" Ryan wanted to know.

Louis shrugged as well as he could with Liam attached to him. "Maybe he likes being challenged, I don't know. We certainly argued plenty this morning."

"Thank God it's not just me," Niall sighed. "I wonder how many of us he argues with?"

"Not us," Ryan answered.

"And not me either," Liam added. "Louis, we woke up and you were gone and we panicked, we were so scared you went home! And then we ran over here and saw your luggage, so we knew it was okay, but man! Don't ever do that to me again!"

"Liam, it's fine," Louis chuckled, petting his hair. "I'm right here, but I can't breathe."

"Oh. Right." Liam let go and stepped back. "And you haven't given me back Joanie, that's what I was mainly worried about."

"Sure, Liam. Whatever you say."

"So, how'd it go?" Niall asked.

"We talked about a lot of things. And I'm really tired, I'm heading to bed. Do we know yet who's got tomorrow's date?"

"Yeah," Mike replied. "It's Max."

"Max. Okay. He seems to like Max, right?"

"Yes," Ryan confirmed. "But Max isn't... I don't know. He's just not who I'd want to see with Harry."

Everyone could agree on that.

"Goodnight, guys." Louis waved, hoping Liam and Niall would follow and glad when he heard them enter the hallway behind him.

Once in the room, Liam and Niall settled on their beds while Louis started undressing.

"Okay, spill," Niall commanded.

"Well, he woke me up before sunrise. We had a picnic on a mountain and watched the sun come up."

"Ohhhhh man, that's romantic," Liam swooned. "I want a sunrise date!"

"I thought you wanted a Nascar date," Louis grinned.

"I want it all, okay? Did you guys kiss while the sun was coming up? That would've been perfect."

"Um... " Trying to remember, Louis shook his head. "I think we just ate and talked. And argued. I was still a little scared at that point, thinking he was pissed at us after Niall's date."

"And he wasn't?" Niall wondered.

"No, he said he knows from things you've said and things I've said that we're not... you know. Doing things."

"I did tell him he's only the third person I've kissed in my life."

"What?" Liam gaped. "That's it? Dude, you need to kiss more people."

"It's quite alright, Liam, I'm perfectly content to only kiss Harry for the rest of my life."

"Yeah, in your dreams. Though I will say he's the best kisser I've ever had."

"I love the way he kisses me," Niall sighed. "I feel like... I don't ever want it to end. Is that how you guys feel, too?"

Neither replied, Louis focusing on changing into his comfy clothes.

"So it's okay for us to share, but not that much, apparently?"

"Niall, it's fine," Louis answered. "It's just... hard to hear it, you know? It's like you said once, you think you have this amazing chemistry with someone and then see that he has it with someone else, too. It hurts."

Liam nodded. "It's been way too long since I kissed him. I mean, he kissed me in Hawaii, but that was like... brief. I want another date with him, so bad."

Settling in next to Liam, Louis wrapped an arm around him. "I think you'll get one. Though there aren't too many dates left before hometown and he has to try everything out. He told me that he's 'cementing his decisions' now and making sure he's on the right track. So I think that means another round of dates for you guys, too. And probably Ryan."

"Wow, I feel bad for the other guys, the ones who haven't even had one date with him." Niall got under the covers and stretched out. "What happened after the sunrise? Was I right about the race track?"

"Yes, it was so intense! We drove actual Nascars. And I won the race. Then we spent some time on the Strip, playing some slots, and we ended with dinner at that Paris hotel."

"You got to go up in the Eiffel Tower, didn't you?" Liam pouted.

"Yeah, sorry. It was cool, we went to the top for a while. And then we had dinner at the restaurant there, the food was so good. And we talked more about the future, about what we want. He really doesn't know what he wants, it's anybody's game at this point."

"But he definitely has his favorites," Niall commented. "You can't deny that."

"No, I agree with that. And we're definitely favorites."

"Along with Ryan," Liam sighed.

Louis squeezed him closer. "Don't worry about it too much. One of the things we talked about today is what happens after the show. I made sure he knows that no matter what happens we'll still be his friend. I mean, I'm not wrong about that, am I?"

Liam shook his head adamantly. "No way! He's cool, and it would suck if I lost him to somebody else, but I'd still be his friend if he wanted. Did he say he wanted that?"

"He said it was something that's been weighing heavy on his mind, that he doesn't want to ruin our friendship. I think it scares him, the idea that by choosing one of us, the other two might get mad."

"We won't get mad," Niall sighed. "Did you make sure he knows that?"

"Yes, I did. But he also got pissed because we talk so much, that we tell each other everything. And then we started arguing about that, about how we're all so close, and he went off about how when he tells us something he hates that we all get together and talk about it."

Guilt hit Niall hard. He'd sensed that Harry said things to him that he wasn't comfortable saying to others. "We probably should respect that. I'm sure he tells you things he doesn't want us knowing, Louis."

Louis shrugged. "Probably, but he seemed better after I informed him that even if he doesn't pick one of us, we still would like to hang out with him. And I noticed you never answered my question on that."

Letting out a long breath, Niall admitted, "I think it would take time."

"What would?" Liam asked.

"For me to handle watching him with someone else. He's not even mine right now and I can barely tolerate it. Imagine us all hanging out and him bringing along a boyfriend. Even if it was someone like Ryan, who I like, it would be really hard. You can't just stop feeling things, not when your feelings are this strong."

"Yeah, it would be hard," Liam agreed, "but it's better than never seeing him again, right?"

"When seeing him rips your heart open every time? I'm not so sure."

"Niall. Look at me."

Niall resisted Louis' command.

"Niall."

"What?" He sat up, irritated. "I know what you're gonna say. I know I'm selfish and that I came into this knowing I probably wouldn't win but that doesn't make it easier, okay? You guys are so laid-back about it, like 'Yeah, he'll probably end up with Ryan and we'll still be cool' but I don't know how to be cool about that. I love him. So much that seeing him touch anyone else makes me want to rage. And if that's wrong, if you're going to tell me that's not love, then fine. But don't tell me everything's going to work out and I should be happy for him. Maybe one day I can be, but not right away."

"Ah, Niall. All I was going to say is that it's natural to feel that way. I never said it wouldn't be hard for me and Liam, just that we can live with it. If you can't... well. That changes things."

"I'm sorry. I love you guys, and if he ends up with one of you I think I'll be okay. It'll hurt sometimes, but I'll accept that God has a plan for me that doesn't include Harry. I'll be able to see that you're happy, whichever of you Harry chooses, and that he's happy, but... " Tears suddenly came out of nowhere and Niall couldn't breathe. "Fuck!"

Liam was there in a flash, hugging Niall tight while Louis stood over them. "Breathe, Niall."

"I haven't let myself think about it, I won't let myself, but when I do I panic, and I can't breathe, because he's so amazing and he's everything I never knew I wanted and I need him, I need him, you guys."

"You've got us," Liam soothed. "We're not going anywhere, okay? Even if you win Harry, we're right here. Always."

"I know. Thank you for that." Niall buried his face in Liam's chest, calm returning. "I'm sorry. Usually I'm able to control myself better. And Louis, don't even think about it. We had a deal."

Louis turned away in frustration.

"I know you, I know you're thinking of just taking yourself out of this competition for me, but that's not fair to Harry. He cares for you a lot, and it wouldn't be fair to him to suddenly disappear because you can't stand to see your friends unhappy."

"This fucking sucks!" Louis yelled. "I want him, but if I get him, it kills you. How am I supposed to be happy with him when I know you're suffering because of it?"

"I told you, as long as he ends up with one of you, I'm fine. Because I know you love him and you'll treat him right. And when I see him smile, when I see that he's happy, that'll be enough."

"Even though it's slicing you in two knowing it's not you who's making him smile?"

Niall nodded. "Even though. I promise, Louis, that I will survive. I've survived worse. And if he chooses you and you don't make me your best man at the wedding, we'll have a serious problem."

"I agree," Liam interjected, looking up at Louis. "But since I want to be your best man, too, Niall and I will have to fight to the death for the honor."

"Shut up," Niall chuckled, shoving Liam away. Liam's bright grin made him laugh. "I don't know how I lived without you guys."

"Doesn't matter, because you always have us. We're here for life, dude."

"I can't wait for Nola to meet you guys. She's going to love you, Liam."

"Yeah, kids usually do. I can't wait, either."

"You okay?" Louis asked seriously, watching Niall in concern.

"Yeah. Promise. Just had a moment."

"It's okay to love him. That's what we're here for."

"I know. I'm more afraid of what happens after. I can't lose you guys, too."

"Who says you're losing Harry?" Liam countered. "You could still win this thing."

"And so could you. And so could Louis. I just wish it was over already, this waiting is killing me. If I don't get him, let me move on now, you know?"

"That's not how the game is played," Louis reminded them. "But we're getting closer. For all we know, Max could go home tomorrow."

"No, Max isn't going anywhere," Niall shook his head.

"You can't know that."

"He's right, Louis. Chris told us today that only two were going to be eliminated this week. That was Dave and Kevin."

"Wait, what? You mean I was safe the whole time today?"

"Yep," Niall smirked. "Bet he didn't bother to tell you that, did he?"

"That asshole! He knew when he sent them home that anyone else he chose to date would be safe. I'm gonna kill him."

"Were you really all that worried, Louis? Honestly?"

At Niall's question, one corner of Louis' mouth lifted. "No. Not really. Not once he told me he knew we weren't sleeping together." Louis slid into his bed, pulling the covers up to his chin. "So we're all safe. Tomorrow's rose ceremony is a joke."

"It's still a chance to spend time with him," Liam grinned. "And I'm gonna make full use of my time. I miss those lips." When a pillow was chucked at him, Liam frowned. "What was that for, Louis?"

"I don't know, you're just annoying me."

"Aww, is Louis jealous? You don't like the thought of me kissing Harry, do you? Afraid I might steal your thunder? I am pretty irresistible."

"Aggravating. Ridiculous. Those are words I'd use to describe you. 'Irresistible' is not one of them."

"Don't forget 'adorable.' You've used that one a few times."

"Go to sleep, Liam. And give me back my pillow."

"Give me back Joanie."

"No way."

"Then suffer." Liam turned off the light and climbed into his own bed, he and Niall having been already dressed in sweats and tees.

"You know, I was thinking," Niall said suddenly.

Liam frowned. "That's always scary."

"Hush. The closer we get to the final weeks, the smaller our group gets."

"Yeah? And?" Louis prodded.

"There won't be a need for three of us to share a room. They'll put us two to a room."

Silence greeted that statement as it sank in that they wouldn't always have each other close.

"And when we get to the final four, none of us will share rooms. That's how it works."

"Explain that," Louis demanded.

"Well, he goes home with us and then one is eliminated at the end. That leaves three. Then we each have our fantasy dates, where he has the option to spend the night with us. I don't even think they allow us to talk to each other at that point."

"No," Liam whispered.

"Seriously. None of us has any idea what's going on until we meet up again for the rose ceremony. We won't know who slept with him and who didn't."

"Is there any one of us who would say no if Harry asked?" Louis reasoned. "Let's be honest."

"That's just it," Niall answered. "He has the option of not asking."

For once even Liam didn't brag, proving how terrified he was.

"What happens then?" Louis pressed.

"He sends one of us home after the sleepovers. That leaves two. Those two go home to meet his family, but each meets with them separately. Again, there's no contact between the contestants. From what I can tell."

"And then the last week?" Liam asked.

"The last week there's a date with each of them. His last chance to make a decision, to compare them and decide what he really wants."

"Can we sleep with him on that one?"

"I think so, Liam. By that time it's usually already happened."

"And then?"

"And then... well, have you guys seen the final episode of any season? The actual proposal?"

"No," they replied in unison.

"Neither contestant knows going into it if the other has already been eliminated. They do it in a way that you show up and you don't know if you're the first one or the last one. If you're the first, it means you lost. That he didn't choose you. But you don't know that until you're there and he has to tell you. If you win, you don't know that, either. Not until he actually proposes."

Liam shivered as if listening to a ghost story. "That's just wrong. I could show up there thinking I have a chance and then get slapped in the face? Man. Harsh."

"It is," Niall nodded, his cheek rubbing against the pillow. "The stress at that point would be enough to drive anyone crazy. It's almost better to be eliminated before you get to that round."

"Almost," Louis added. "But not quite."

"No," Niall sighed. "Not quite. Because at that point it's not about winning. It's about holding on to the man you love, and realizing that the future you want with him may not be what he wants. It's... really hard, even watching it on T.V. I always feel bad for the one who gets turned down, because you know they really love him. And you know that he loves them, too, just... not as much as he loves the winner."

"We all know he has feelings for us, right?" Louis asked.

"Yeah, he does," Liam replied. "But who does he love most?"

No one could answer that question, and so none of them attempted to. Instead they thought back over the previous weeks, remembering each smile and touch from Harry and analyzing every word he'd said. By the time they fell into a troubled sleep, each of them was frustrated.

They were going into another rose ceremony knowing each one of them was safe, but their futures were more uncertain than ever.


	17. Chapter 17

Max was gone all the next day, the remaining guys thrilled to hear they would be given money and allowed to enjoy the Luxor's casino for a few hours. Liam, Niall, and Louis stuck together, realizing their time was short now.

Max of course returned from his date with a rose, not that Harry had had any choice after sending Dave and Kevin home, and Chris gathered everyone in the main suite to pass on the message that their party tonight would be just that—a party. As there was no pressure and no need for anyone to sweat over their fate, Harry requested that all of them simply get together for a night of fun and enjoy themselves out at the pool area and promised to spend time with each and every one of them.

Harry was all smiles as usual, in a festive mood and not giving away any hints as to how his date with Max had gone. For the first half hour Austin, Jared, Jerry, and Max demanded Harry's attention, the other five happy to let them act like fools and playing a game of volleyball in the pool. Eventually Harry dragged everyone else over to join in, and the game became cutthroat once Louis and Harry were pitted against each other, their natural competitiveness coming out to shine. When it looked like Harry's team was going to lose, he offered an extra ten minutes of alone time later to whichever member of his team made the winning pass. It worked, Mike coming through for the win, and Louis and Niall scowled across the net. Liam was happy enough, having been on Harry's team, and suddenly jumped him in the pool, wrapping his legs around him and saying, "I think the rest of us should get an extra five minutes. Since we helped."

Harry laughed and agreed, kissing Liam while the rest groaned and Louis chucked the ball at them. It almost knocked them over, both of them giggling as Liam gave Louis the finger.

"Oh, it's on." Louis swam under the net to take them both down, Harry letting out a shriek and backing away so that Liam suffered the attack when Louis dragged him under the water.

"How about some drinks?" Harry called out suddenly, anxious to get away from the antics of the other two before being tackled underwater himself. Everyone laughed and joined him, making their way to the bar and leaving Louis and Liam to play. Niall caught Jared whispering to Austin and knew it was about Louis and Liam, but remembered that Harry didn't approve of speculation of that sort and refrained from calling them out.

At a particularly loud shriek from Liam, Niall rolled his eyes and trudged back to the pool, hissing at them. "Will you two get out of there and start acting like adults? Don't make Harry jealous."

"Oh. Right." Louis scooped Liam up and then tossed him away, snickering when Liam came up spluttering.

"I'll get you, Tommo. Hey Niall, is Harry really jealous?"

"He doesn't seem like it, but you know he's not going to show it in front of the other guys if he is. Just get out, come hang with the rest of us."

Music was suddenly piped across the pool area, everyone looking around and cheering. "Yeah, let's go dance!" Liam yelled. He rushed out of the pool and over to the group, immediately dragging Harry away from the bar while Harry tried to hold onto his drink.

"Shit, he's going to piss everyone off at this rate," Niall worried. "He's all over Harry."

"So is everyone else, he might as well." Louis plucked a towel off a nearby pile and rubbed it over his face, then dried his hair somewhat.

"We're not. And neither are Mike and Ryan. Notice that? His favorites are the ones who don't throw themselves at him?"

"Yeah, but why is Liam immune to that? He seems to like it when Liam does it."

"Because he's Liam. If anyone else had jumped him like that and kissed him in the pool, Harry wouldn't have let it happen."

"I'm not so sure about that. Look over there."

Niall did, where the other guys were dancing to the music and Jerry had cut in on Liam and Harry, Jerry quite aggressively grinding against Harry.

"Wow," Niall commented.

"Yeah, Harry doesn't seem to be fighting that at all."

"He's horny. You can't really blame him."

"Aren't we all?" Louis complained. "I love how Liam doesn't let it bother him, he just dances around anyway and has a good time."

"Want to dance?" Niall invited, half-joking.

"No. Not at all. I don't dance."

"I don't either, not much. It's not that I don't like it, I'm just not very good at it. Barbara got me dancing at our wedding and that was fun, but I still felt self-conscious about it, you know? Everyone staring and me not knowing what I was doing."

Louis nodded in complete understanding. "Harry got me dancing last night. Poorly."

"Wow, really?"

"Yeah. Some slow song, and I felt like an idiot because I tried, but I just couldn't make my body get into it. He kept telling me to just relax, to let the music take me away, but... I don't know. I couldn't lose myself the way he can."

"Fuck, he's hot," Niall suddenly said in a low voice. "Look at him move."

"I know. We should probably look away now. Wait, doesn't it bother you? Like at the luau, when you were getting jealous watching us all dance with him?"

"It does, but I can't seem to stop watching him. His hips, how does he just... mmm." Shaking his head, Niall turned away. "I need a drink."

"Let's go do that."

Louis and Niall took seats at the bar, their backs to the craziness behind them, and talked while trying not to think about the fact that Harry was practically fucking the other guys across the patio. Occasionally their eyes drifted back and they were forced to stare as the dancing got more heated, lips and hands involved eventually, Niall and Louis both fighting their own bodies that were responding to the sight of Harry not only aggressive but sexually so.

"I really wish I knew how to dance," Louis muttered at one point, watching Harry and Liam move to the beat wrapped up in each other. "I bet it's amazing to feel Harry like—oh fuck, it's getting intense."

Niall spun around in spite of his wishes to not see more, witnessing Harry now dancing with Jerry while Austin moved in behind him, Harry letting his head fall back on Austin's shoulder while Jerry attacked his neck. "Holy fuck," Niall whispered. "He's gonna lose it. Where the hell is Rich?"

"Rich?"

"Yeah, he... never mind. But someone needs to-" His words cut off when Jerry's lips traveled down Harry's chest, Jared then moving in to suck at his neck, and Harry could barely stand with the lust coursing through him. "Shit."

In two seconds Niall was up, cutting through the bodies and grabbing Harry's wrist to tug hard. It woke him up, Harry blinking in surprise at Niall, then allowing Niall to pull him away toward the pool. "I need five minutes with you," Niall said softly. "Please?"

"Yeah, of course." Out of breath, Harry slid into the pool after Niall did, dunking his body for a moment before standing and rubbing water out of his face. "You okay?"

"I'm fine, Harry. Are you?"

"Yeah, just... wow. Fuck. So hot right now."

"I know. That's why I pulled you away. I think you were about to snap."

"Fuck, it felt so good. I'm going crazy not able to do anything."

Niall nodded, again saying, "I know. I didn't see Rich around, so... "

Harry suddenly laughed, hugging Niall to him. "So that was your version of yelling 'Anne'?"

"Well, somebody had to," Niall blushed.

"You could've joined in, you know," Harry said slyly. "I wouldn't have minded."

"Yeah, and our pants would have disappeared in five seconds."

"We're not wearing pants."

"Even worse, then. Two seconds."

Laughing again, Harry pressed a kiss to Niall's lips. "I love the way you know me so well, even though it's only been a few weeks. You saw me and knew."

"I did. I know exactly what it looks like when you're turned on. Though I've never seen you quite that... heated."

"I usually keep it better contained. Though with you, I admit I don't have a lot of control."

"I'll take that as a compliment."

"You should."

They grinned at each other. "I bet everyone thinks I pulled you over here because I was jealous."

"Were you?" Harry asked.

Niall shrugged, not meeting his eyes.

"You can tell me."

"I can't really be jealous in a situation like this, when you're allowed to freely touch everyone. It's part of the game."

"Answer my question."

Harry's eyes were intense on Niall's when he glanced up, Niall's body feeling the pull as it always did when Harry looked at him like that. "Yes," he finally answered in a low voice. "Every time you touch someone else, I want to rip their heads off."

When Harry's mouth smothered his, Niall gasped and buried his fingers in Harry's wet hair, tugging as his legs wrapped around Harry's waist. Harry spun them so that Niall was up against the pool wall, his hips thrusting and the whirlwind taking them away again, both lost to everything around them and aware only of the sensations rushing through them as they tried to get closer, it seemed they could never get close enough. Niall kept trying to somehow climb up Harry's body as if that would help, frustrated groans escaping into Harry's mouth and Harry's hands squeezing from behind to grind them together. Niall moaned then, desperate for something he'd never known but instinctively craved, and for the first time Harry didn't seem like he had any intention of stopping, there wasn't even an ounce of restraint in his touch.

A loud cry of "Cannonball!" from behind had them jolting, two bodies crashing the water and sending waves closer to wash over them, and finally Niall dropped his legs and backed off. Of course it was Louis and Liam, and while they acted as if they were simply being their silly selves, Niall knew they'd done it to break through the trance that had fallen over him and Harry. "Thanks," he mouthed to Louis, who nodded but didn't seem all that happy, and Niall knew it must have hurt to witness that.

Harry sucked in a breath. "I think it's time to start my private time with each of you. Liam, you're up."

"Woohoo!"

When Harry turned away, Liam hopped up onto his back, forcing Harry to catch him, and the two giggled as Harry carried him out of the pool and into the hotel, not even caring that they were dripping everywhere.

"I'm sorry about that," Niall apologized. "I brought him over here for the exact opposite reason, because I know he gets turned on and sometimes can't control it. He's used to sex all the time."

"I'm aware of that," Louis replied in a slightly acidic tone.

"Louis, I'm sorry. I don't know what happened. We were just talking and the next thing I knew he was on me. I lose my head around him, it's crazy, I can't seem to control-"

"Niall, you don't have to explain. I keep telling you, it's not wrong to feel that way about him, that's why we're here."

"But you're pissed."

"No, I'm jealous. And a little hurt. If you can get hurt over it, so can I."

"I never said you couldn't. Dammit, Louis, I can't lose you. I'm sorry, I won't let it happen again."

"Quit apologizing! It's gonna happen, and if it's not you it's somebody else. Next time it might even be me, and you'll be the one standing there having to see it. It's just how things are, there's no need to be sorry."

"Fine, but then don't make me feel guilty about it, either."

"I didn't! I told you, it's no big deal."

"But it is. It's a huge deal, to both of us. It's not going to get easier."

"I know that. Why do you keep saying things I already know? Let's just stop talking about it."

"Okay."

"Fine."

After taking a deep breath, Niall shook his head and pulled Louis into a hug. "I don't want to fight with you."

"I don't either. It's so hard, though."

"I know."

They held onto each other until they were calm, Louis finally suggesting, "Let's go get some food. There's a whole buffet set up we haven't even tried."

Niall glanced over near the bar, where the rest of the guys were filling plates and laughing, trying to enjoy themselves and not let the pressure of it all ruin the fun—which was exactly what Harry had requested. "Sounds good. And you'll have time alone with Harry yourself later, don't forget."

"Yeah. Can't wait."

"I figure I used up my time just now. I won't be upset if he passes over me later."

"I bet he doesn't. I bet he still takes you away for a few minutes."

Niall shrugged. "Either way, I enjoyed my time with him tonight."

"I'll just bet you did."

For a second Niall thought Louis was pissed, but then he realized Louis was smirking and he punched Louis in the arm, both of them laughing as they joined the other guys.

* * *

There was a small room that had been set up for "alone time," reminding Liam very much of their first kiss in the cabin. This one had a fireplace as well, and a big cozy chair that Liam chose over the couch, shoving Harry back into it once Harry had released him.

"Uh oh, Liam is on the prowl," Harry smirked.

He climbed onto Harry's lap, settling in close with a smirk of his own. "I get horny Harry tonight. It's my lucky day."

"Yes," Harry grinned, "but I have to behave. So be nice."

"You weren't behaving with Niall."

The smile faded. "That wasn't supposed to happen."

"But it did. So you owe me." Liam attacked Harry's lips, Harry groaning before giving in, allowing Liam to grind over him with only two thin layers of fabric between them.

"Liam, fuck. I need to get you dancing with me again."

"That _was_ pretty hot, at least until everyone else joined in."

"Yes, but... okay, you need to stop moving."

"But why?" Liam whined, rocking harder. "We're all alone, nobody has to know."

"But _I_ know. And I can't. I'm sorry." Harry lifted Liam up and off him, setting him gently on his knees. "You don't know how sorry I am."

"I can see it." Liam slid his palm over Harry's erection, Harry hissing before standing and lifting a leg over Liam's head to put distance between them, approaching the fire with his back to Liam.

"This is hard enough, don't make it harder."

Liam sighed and twisted to settle back into the chair. "Okay. How long do I have with you?"

"Well, you get an extra five minutes, remember?"

"Oh yeah! So when do I get another date?"

Harry shook his head, unable to fight the grin that split his lips as he faced Liam. "You don't ever give up, do you?"

"Not when it's something I want."

"I can't promise anything. But I can tell you that I want to. I had a lot of fun on our last date."

"I know you did. I did, too."

"Where would you like to go, Liam?"

"On a date? You're letting me pick?"

"Again, I'm not promising anything. And it can't be something we've already done, so no Nascar for you."

"Man, that's so unfair. Louis gets all the cool stuff. He got a Lakers game, the Eiffel Tower, Nascar... "

"And all you got was camping and making out in a tent."

"Aww, I'm not complaining." When Liam held out his arms, Harry went, kneeling between his legs. "Our date was awesome."

"Which we've agreed on. Now where would you like to go?"

"What city are we going to next? Is it in the U.S.?"

"I can't tell you that."

"Come on, you're just gonna tell us all in a few hours anyway."

Harry sighed. "Liam, you are so aggravating sometimes."

"But you love me, right?"

Rolling his eyes, Harry nevertheless grinned and said, "Yes. And I guess it won't kill you to know where we're going next. It's nothing exciting, we're going back to L.A. The mansion."

"Oh, really? That's exciting to me, I haven't seen any of L.A. Do I get to see the city this time?"

"No comment."

"Harry," Liam whined. "You can't tease me like that!"

"You're so adorable," Harry chuckled, arms around Liam.

"That's what Louis always says." Liam let out an overly dramatic sigh and said, "I guess I'll go back out there now, since I'm not getting anything else out of you."

"Kiss first?"

Liam grinned. "Of course!"

As Liam was about to exit the room, Harry called out, "Send someone else in!"

"Who?"

"I don't care, surprise me. But not Louis."

Liam spun around, eyes wide. "You don't want to see Louis?"

"I didn't say that, I only said I don't want Louis right now."

"... okay."

"Just go, Liam."

"If you don't want Louis, can I have his time? Double your pleasure."

"Get out!" Harry yelled, laughing, and Liam winked before he was gone.

"Oh, Liam. How did I ever survive without you in my life?"

* * *

About halfway through the parade of men, Niall quirked an eyebrow at Liam. "What does he do, tell you when you leave to send the next guy in?"

"Exactly," Liam replied, stuffing his face with a cupcake. "He said anybody but Louis."

"Excuse me?" Louis interrupted, sitting up straighter in his seat at the table they'd taken over.

"He did. But not that he didn't want you at all, just not right then."

"Why the fuck not?"

"Calm down, Louis," Niall soothed, leaning over to lay a hand on Louis' wrist. "Maybe he's saving the best for last."

"Nope, I was first."

"Liam, not now." Niall settled back into his chair only when Louis had done the same.

"We should dance," Liam suggested, eyes on the other guys, most of which were doing just that.

"We don't dance," Louis argued, still pissy about Harry not wanting him.

"If it bothers you that much, Louis, go bust your way in. Everyone else does it."

"Yes, Niall, but we're not everyone else. We're not rude."

"Actually, I'm going to." Niall stood up, the other two gaping at him in shock. "Not like that, don't get your panties in a bunch. But we've all pigged out and he's had nothing to eat, so I'm going to make him a plate. I'm sure he's starving."

Liam snickered. "Always the mom."

"Father, Liam, father. Or at least call me a parent." Niall spun on his heel and went to the buffet, filling a plate with things he thought Harry would like. He knew Louis and Liam assumed he was jealous and wanted to see Harry, but the truth was he had been thinking about it for a while and felt bad that Harry hadn't had anything to eat yet. After picking up a beer from the bar, he took both the plate and bottle into the hotel, finding the room quickly.

He peeked in, knowing it was Ryan who was holed up with Harry at the moment, and knocked lightly at the door to get their attention. They'd been sitting on the couch laughing together, and Niall almost felt bad until Harry's eyes lit up at the sight of him; that made it all worth it.

"Niall! Hey."

"Hey. Sorry to interrupt, guys, but I thought Harry might be hungry."

"I am, thanks!" Harry stood and met Niall halfway, Niall trying to get a sense of Ryan's feelings but picking up nothing hostile. "And you brought me potato salad. I love you."

Niall grinned. "I remembered that much about your eating habits, anyway." He passed over the food and beer, Harry careful not to drop the silverware as he received it.

"Thanks." Harry dropped a quick kiss on Niall's cheek, Niall flushing before clearing his throat.

"Catch you guys later."

"Bye, Niall," Ryan waved.

"Bye, Ryan." Grateful that Ryan didn't seem angry, Niall backed out of the room and returned to the pool area with a smile on his face. Their table was empty, causing Niall to frown as his gaze roamed the patio, then his eyes widened. Louis was... _dancing?_

Or at least attempting to. It was almost comical, the way it had been in Hawaii, but Liam was doing well in getting him to loosen up. Niall joined them with a grin. "Having fun?"

"We're trying, but Louis doesn't know how to relax."

"I know how to relax," Louis argued.

"Not when you dance, you don't. Come on, like this." Liam did a simple move, making his body flow effortlessly, and Niall fought to keep a straight face when Louis tried to replicate it.

"What's wrong?" Liam asked. "You were doing good."

"I don't know, I hate dancing. I told you."

"Come on," Liam said again. "You can do this."

"Yeah, Louis, you can do this," Niall snickered.

"You be quiet. How'd it go with Harry?"

"Fine. I just took him a plate of food, it was nothing special."

"Was Ryan pissed?" Liam wanted to know.

"Didn't seem like it. I was only in there for maybe two minutes, tops."

"What were they doing when you walked in?"

"Liam," Louis scolded. "That's rude."

"Yeah, and you want to know the answer." When Louis didn't reply, Liam gave him a smug smile.

"They were just talking, guys. Or laughing, I guess."

"But were they cuddled up together?"

"No, Liam, they were just... I don't know. Talking."

"But how were they sitting?"

"Just next to each other on the couch. Harry got up to take the food and then I left."

"You should've stayed longer."

"Liam, if you want to know so bad-" Niall shut up abruptly at a look of warning from Liam, and he knew Ryan was approaching.

"Niall, it's your turn."

"Me? But I had my time in the pool with him."

"Don't argue," Louis said, shoving Niall in the direction of the hotel. "Just take what you can get."

"I'm sorry for interrupting, Ryan."

"It's fine, Niall. He ended up sharing with me, so it worked out for both of us," Ryan smiled.

"Okay, cool. See you guys in a few, I guess."

The smile Harry greeted him with had Niall's heart flipping over in his chest, and he knew that no matter how much making out Harry and Louis had done on their date, nothing had changed between Harry and himself. It was a relief when Harry stood and pulled Niall into his arms, Niall sinking into the embrace and resting there, feeling Harry's strong heartbeat under his cheek.

"Hi again," Harry said softly, kissing Niall's temple.

"Hi."

Neither moved for a long time, Niall wishing they never had to again, except of course for the fact that Nola was too far away.

"Thanks for the food, that was thoughtful."

"I figured you must be hungry. As Liam said, it's the parent in me, making sure you're taken care of."

"Yeah, you're always worried about everyone else. You don't see that a lot around here."

Louis popped into Niall's brain at that point, and he wondered if Harry was thinking the same thing. "I would apologize for what happened in the pool, but I think you'd probably tell me not to be sorry."

"That's exactly what I would say. You were just trying to help."

"Help myself, apparently," Niall chuckled.

Harry laughed before pressing his lips to Niall's forehead again.

"You really shouldn't have called me in here. I've had plenty of you tonight."

"It's never enough, Niall. It'll probably be days before I can do this again. Weeks, even."

"What, touch me?"

"Be this close to you, yeah. Seeing you across a room isn't enough anymore."

Heart melting, Niall's arms tightened around Harry's waist. They were still standing in the middle of the room just holding each other, Niall's face against Harry's bare chest and feeling the tight muscles shift every time Harry did, and for five long minutes they did nothing more. Niall's eyes closed as he felt himself relaxing completely so that when Harry did speak, he jumped slightly.

"How late is it in Missouri?"

"Uh... I don't know. What time is it here?"

"I took off my watch, I have no idea. But it can't be that late, right?"

"No, probably not."

"Have you called her today?"

"I did earlier, while you were out with Max."

"Oh."

The disappointment in Harry's voice tugged at Niall's heart. "But if you said you wanted to, I bet they'd let us call her. Just for a few minutes."

"Yeah?"

"I think so, don't you?"

Harry stepped back, fear in his eyes that was mixed with anticipation. He was nervous and it made Niall want to kiss him until he was calm again. "Is that okay? Your mom won't mind?"

"Of course not, she knows we miss each other. And it won't be a long phone call anyway."

"Come on." Harry took Niall's hand, knowing exactly where to find the right people to make it happen.

Niall was nervous, too, having no idea what this would do. What would Harry even say to her? Nola did have a mouth on her, and if she didn't like what Harry had to say, she would make it known. "Harry, maybe we shouldn't-"

It was too late, though. Harry had a phone in his hand and passed it to Niall, who swallowed before dialing. There was of course someone standing near and listening, which Niall always found ridiculous. What was he possibly going to say to his five-year-old daughter that could give away clues about the show?

His mother picked up, surprised, and Niall quickly explained that he needed to talk to Nola. When she asked he reassured her that everything was fine and their time was short, and in less than thirty seconds his angel's sleepy voice resonated over the airwaves. "Daddy?"

Immediately his lips curved up, his face brightening. "Hey, pumpkin. You asleep?"

"I was. Grandma woke me up. Where are you?"

"I'm still in Las Vegas, honey. At the big pyramid."

"With the light shooting into the sky?"

"Yes," Niall chuckled, aware of Harry's gaze on him. "It's shooting up there right now."

"Take a picture!"

"I'll try, but I don't know how well it will come out."

"Are you coming home tomorrow, Daddy?"

"No, sweetie, I told you earlier. A few more weeks, okay?" He hoped, at least. Harry did nothing to give him a hint, only smiled when he caught Niall's eye. "I miss you, though."

"I know. What kind of animals are in the big pyramid? Lions and tigers?"

"Well... you know what? Hang on, my friend Harry is here-" Harry's eyes grow round as saucers "-and he can tell you. Want to talk to him?" Harry was shaking his head emphatically, panic screaming from every pore.

"Is he nice?"

"He's very nice, Nola. Hold on." With a grin Niall passed Harry the phone. "She wants to know what kinds of animals we have here at the hotel."

"What should I say?"

"You'll figure it out. Just pretend you're talking to Lou's daughter." When Harry still looked terrified, Niall grabbed the phone and set it on speaker. "You there, pumpkin?"

"Yeah, Daddy. Where's Harry?"

"I'm uh... I'm right here. Hi."

"Hi. Daddy says you know about the animals."

"Well, um... we saw some cats the other day. In the exhibit."

"Cats? Were they black? Those are bad luck."

"No, they're not, Nola," Niall interrupted. "I told you, that's a myth. It's not true." Harry lifted an eyebrow in disagreement, and Niall rolled his eyes. "Not you, too."

Harry only shrugged. "They were black," he said to Nola. "And we didn't see any, but there's a hotel here that has lions and tigers."

"Really? What color?"

"The tigers are white. I'd guess the lions are the normal color."

"Simba is a lion."

"Who?"

"Simba. His daddy died."

Harry blinked suddenly, panic returning.

Niall smiled. "It's a movie, Harry. _The Lion King._ How have you not seen that?"

"I saw that, Niall. I just didn't know what she was talking about right away."

"You watched the movie?" Nola asked in excitement. "I like Pumbaa."

"I like Timon," Harry grinned.

"Timon's a meerkat! They live in the ground and talk to each other. And eat bugs. Ew."

"Yeah, I don't like bugs either. What about Mufasa, he was pretty cool, huh?"

"Yeah! Do you like _Toy Story_?"

"Of course! Who's your favorite in that?"

"I like Buzz. He can do flips!"

They were bonding over Disney movies. Niall felt tears rise in his eyes and had to turn away. He knew it wasn't a sign that they'd all live happily ever after, nor was it even a guarantee that Harry would want to be part of their family, but it was a step.

"He can, that's right. You know what, Nola? I can do flips, too."

"Nuh uh!"

"It's true."

Niall spun around, wondering why in the world Harry would say something like that. "Can you really?"

Harry nodded, a smug smile on his face.

"Can you teach me, Harry?"

Niall's heart swelled impossibly at the excitement in her voice. He begged Harry with his eyes, pleaded for Harry not to make promises he couldn't keep.

"We'll see. If I ever get the chance to meet you, I will. How does that sound?"

"Yay! Grandma, I'm gonna learn flips!"

"Shit," Niall sighed. He took the phone back and turned it off speaker. "Nola, honey, we have to go now. I'll call you tomorrow, okay?"

"Okay, Daddy! Bye, Harry!"

Warring with himself, Niall ended up passing the phone back to Harry. "She wants to say goodbye."

"Oh." Pressing the phone to his ear, Harry said, "Goodnight, Nola. Sweet dreams. Uh huh. I will. Promise. Oh, Spongebob? Yeah, I've seen a little bit of that. He'll keep you safe. Okay. Goodnight."

When Harry handed the phone over, the call had been disconnected. Niall frowned, returning the phone to the man who had given it to them.

"What's wrong? Did I say something wrong?"

"No, it's just now she's all excited about something that might never happen. She's had enough disappointment in her life, Harry, don't make promises to her that you can't keep."

"I didn't promise her anything."

"You might as well have. Kids are like that, you say 'maybe' and they hear 'definitely.'"

"I'm sorry. If I do get to meet her, I'll teach her how to do a backflip. I wasn't lying."

"Really? You can do that?"

With a smirk, Harry commanded, "Stand back."

"What, you're gonna do it right here?"

"I don't need much." Harry looked around to be sure he had room, and then crouched before flipping his legs into the air and turning over to land flawlessly, arms out.

"Holy shit. Where did you learn that?"

"I took dance as a kid. That was something we learned. I still do it when I work out in the mornings, just to keep myself in shape. The day I can't backflip anymore is the day I give up on life."

"You are so... "

"What? Ridiculous?"

"Precious," Niall replied, sliding his arms around Harry's waist. "I don't like that you're so amazing. It scares me because I might lose this without ever really knowing what it's like to have it."

Harry sighed. "I know. I wish there was something I could say to calm your fears about that, but... "

"Don't. Don't make promises you can't keep."

"I'm not going to."

That brought the reality of their situation crashing down on Niall again, and he moved away suddenly. "How long have we been in here?"

"Uh... way too long. Let's get back out there."

Niall didn't even bother to kiss Harry before leaving him, thoughts a jumbled mess as he returned to the pool area alone. Was he supposed to send someone else in to Harry?

Louis didn't give him a chance to decide. He passed Niall on his way into the hotel. "Done now?"

"Yes. Sorry."

"I told you. Don't be."

And then Louis was gone, Niall wanting to scream in frustration. This entire situation was so fucked up, everything about it. He wanted it to be over, wanted to be home with his daughter and awaiting a phone call from either Louis or Liam, one where they'd laugh and catch up on life and not all be fighting over the same perfect man.

But he also wanted to be waiting for that perfect man to walk through the door with dinner he'd picked up on the way home from the airport, planning to surprise them with Nola's favorite pizza and the ice cream he'd also stopped for as a treat. He held on to that vision, Harry greeting him with a hug and that bright smile that lit up his face as he swung Niall around before doing the same to Nola.

_I've got to stop torturing myself like this. It's only going to kill me more when he chooses someone else._

Liam waved him over and Niall shoved the visions aside. Dwelling on dreams that might never come true would only make this harder.

* * *

Louis had crossed the room and was almost upon him when Harry finally turned away from the fireplace he'd been staring into; having been lost in the flames, Harry hadn't even heard him approach. He smiled, pleasantly surprised. "Louis! Hi!"

"Hey. Hope you don't mind, I decided to be next."

"Of course not! Having a good time out there?"

"It's alright. It's nice not having to worry about who's getting a rose and who's not, since you already sent home the ones who aren't."

"Yeah, I'm not sitting here terrified I might send the wrong person home, either. It's nice on both sides."

"Do you worry about that? Really? I figured you made your decisions and never looked back."

"That's partly true, I mean once the decision is made I can't allow myself to doubt it or regret it. I'd go crazy. But until I make the decision, there's a lot of wondering and second-guessing myself. It's a lot harder than it was in the beginning to say goodbye to someone you really like and know you'll never see him again."

"I can imagine." Trying to steer Harry away from the heavy topic, Louis said, "Speaking of which, it would've been nice to know on our date that I wasn't going home at the end of the night."

Harry frowned. "Why would you think I'd send you home? Did you really fear that?"

"Not too much, I guess, but there's always that chance. Dates with you are awesome, but if they go badly I get sent home. I wish I'd known I was safe the whole time."

"You mean you didn't? I'd already sent home the two for the week."

"Yes, but none of us realized only two would go home. We're used to three."

"Oh my god, I'm sorry! I would've said something. Aww, Louis, I'm sorry. Come here." Harry pulled Louis into a hug, laughing softly. "I bet Max was terrified all day. I didn't even realize. Would you have done anything differently if you'd known?"

"No, I'm just me. Take me or leave me."

"I love that about you. Most of the time."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. Because I'm the same way. I'm not going to change for anyone."

"Not even Niall?"

Harry tensed in Louis' arms, then stepped back to glare at him. "I'm not discussing Niall with you. I don't care that he's your best buddy, it's not your business. Except of course that he'll just tell you everything anyway."

"I never said it was my business."

"Then why ask?"

"Because, Harry! I need to know if I even have a chance here! I was sure I did, for a while I felt like I had nothing to worry about, and then I see you and Niall going at it in the pool-"

"I'm sorry, that wasn't supposed to-"

"But it did. And it undoes everything we built on our date, I feel like the time I spent with you meant nothing and I'm losing you and-"

"Louis. Look at me. The time we spend together is more special to me than you can ever know. There's so much I can't say, and to be honest I've said way more than I should have to all of you but trust me when I say there's more, a _lot_ more. You can't think that way, you can't doubt everything just because I kiss someone else. For God's sake, that was you at one point! I made out with you like that because I couldn't help myself! Why is it wrong when I do it with Niall?"

Louis bit his lip, unable to meet Harry's eyes. "Because it's not me."

The fight went out of Harry, him pulling Louis close again and kissing his hair. "I'm sorry. This situation sucks, Louis. I can't say the things I want to any of you and it leaves you having to guess at everything and that's how it works, that's how it's supposed to be, but we suffer for it. All of us. Just know that no matter what happens with anyone else, my feelings for you don't change. Haven't we been through this? What does it take for you to believe it?"

"I don't know. Most of the time I'm fine. Moments like that, though... I feel like I'm driving both you and Niall away, and I don't want to lose either of you."

"If I end up with Niall, you're going to have to live with that. You know that, right? Louis, will you look at me? I'm not saying I'm going to end up with him. But you were the one who said you could handle it. Has that changed?"

"No," Louis sighed. "If I knew for sure you were going to choose Niall or Liam or anyone else, for that matter, I wouldn't be like this. It's because I still have a chance that I'm fighting so hard for it. I'll do what it takes to keep you."

Harry smiled. "That's good to know. It's what I would expect in a future husband."

Finally Louis' lips curved up. "I'm sorry. I've never been insecure like this. It's what you do to me."

"I think it's more the situation. If we were away from here, would you still fear losing me so much?"

"No, because you wouldn't be out kissing other guys. Right?"

"Exactly. Your lips would be the only ones I'd ever touch."

"So I just have to make it through this."

Harry didn't reply right away. "I can't make any promises, Louis. But I can tell you that my feelings for you are intense and I can see a life with you."

"But that doesn't mean I'm the only one you feel that way about."

"I can't promise anything," Harry repeated. "Just trust that I mean what I do say and that doesn't change."

Louis nodded. "Okay."

"Okay?"

"Yeah. Can I... " Louis lifted his lips to Harry, who met the kiss eagerly and in a way that assuaged Louis' doubts. No matter what Niall or anyone else had with Harry, there was still magic when they kissed, Louis sinking into it the way he always did.

"Did you know," Harry murmured after nibbling at Louis' lips, "that kissing you is one of my favorite things to do?"

Blushing slightly, Louis smiled. "I didn't know that, no."

"It's true. I think we should spend more time doing that and less arguing."

"I'm good with that plan."

"Glad to hear it." Harry kissed him again, and it didn't matter that Louis hadn't been on the winning team earlier; he got five extra minutes anyway.

* * *

Harry got the group together when he'd seen everyone, thanking them for a fun night and informing them their next stop was once again Los Angeles and that they'd be leaving early in the morning for their short flight.

That didn't keep the guys from staying up once they'd returned to their room, each of them on their own bed and Niall anxious to fix things between Louis and himself. Hands in his lap, he said, "Louis, can we talk about this?"

Louis sighed, but it wasn't as if he was upset. Instead he scooted off his bed and went to Niall's, hugging Niall close. "I'm sorry about earlier. I was jealous and I overreacted and I was just an idiot."

"I understand, I've had my moments too, remember?"

When Louis laid back on Niall's bed, Niall let Louis pull him down, needing the reassurance of being close as well.

"How was your time with Harry, Liam?" Louis asked.

"It was great. He was horny. He's got way too much willpower, though. Impossible to break."

The other two were quiet, remembering times Harry had lost control with them. Did that mean he hadn't ever done that with Liam?

"How about you, Louis?" Liam wondered. "How was your time?"

Louis snorted. "We argued again."

Niall sat up, surprised. "You fought with him again?"

"Yes. But we agreed that in the future we'll kiss instead."

"Sounds like something Liam would say," Niall smirked.

"Well, it's true. Kissing is way better than arguing. That's why Harry and I do it so much."

"At least we don't brag about it," Louis pointed out, pulling Niall down again. "So are we good? I don't know why my jealousy is getting out of control."

Niall relaxed against Louis, mind on the fact that Harry would possibly see this moment one day and wondering if he should worry. He and Louis weren't the only ones with a jealous streak. "It's because it's so hard to see the man you love with someone else. No matter how cool we keep saying we are with it, we can only take so much."

Louis nodded. "And we already know you have problems with it."

"I do. I'm trying really hard to not let it get to me, to keep in mind that I have no claim on Harry."

Liam shook his head. "But that's not the way to think of it, either. You can't give him half of you because you're afraid you might not get him. Then you'll leave here and think you could've done more to keep him. Just be honest with him and with yourself, tell him what you're feeling. Don't be so scared to fall in love, Niall."

Niall sighed, knowing Liam was right. "I'm already in love. When I leave here, it's going to be a long time before I can even look at somebody else again."

Louis agreed. "He's like no one I've ever met."

"Okay, enough depressing talk." Niall sat up. "I'm gonna go ahead and shower now, you two can fight over it in the morning."

"No need to fight," Liam shrugged, laying down and sliding under his blankets. "Louis will let me go first."

"What makes you so sure of that?" Louis asked.

"Because I always get my way with you. You can't stand to see me sad."

Rolling his eyes, Louis sat up. "You don't always get your way. I still have Joanie."

Liam's eyes narrowed. "I'm gonna find her."

"Not when I change her hiding place every day."

"I hate you."

"No, you don't," Louis smiled. "You love me."

"I still hate you."

Repacking his belongings, Niall came across a tiny t-shirt Harry had paid for in San Francisco. He lifted it from the suitcase with a smile, remembering the way Harry had shoved him aside and tossed his credit card on the counter, ignoring Niall's arguments that he had money and could afford it himself.

"What's that?" Liam questioned, the Joanie debate momentarily forgotten.

"A shirt we picked up in San Francisco for Nola. It's got fish on it, see? She'll love it."

"We? As in... you and Harry?"

"Well, I picked it out," Niall said to Louis.

"So uh... how was your time with Harry tonight? You were in there for quite a while."

Niall folded the shirt and set it in his suitcase, keeping his back to them. "It was good."

Liam's eyes narrowed, shifting over to meet Louis' before straying to Niall again. "What did you do? Did you guys spend the whole time making out?"

"No, Liam, we actually didn't even kiss. We just... talked."

"About what?" Louis wanted to know.

"Nola mostly. And I apologized for attacking him in the pool."

"I'm sure he didn't mind that," Louis commented, bringing a shrug out of Niall.

"No, but we still didn't mean for it to happen. It just kind of... does." Zipping his suitcase closed, Niall picked up the sweats he'd grabbed to sleep in and headed toward the bathroom. "See you guys in the morning, if you're not still awake when I'm done."

"Goodnight," Louis called out, still on Niall's bed. When the door was closed, he turned to Liam. "Harry asked me if I want kids."

"Yeah? What did you say?"

"I told him the truth, that I don't right now, but I might someday. Do you?"

"Want kids?" Liam considered that, quiet for a minute before saying, "You know, I've never really thought about it. I mean, with the business and the dogs and all, I'm busy enough as it is. I wouldn't even have time for kids. Did Harry give you the same answer he gave me about kids? That he doesn't know?"

"He didn't talk about his own feelings. Just wanted to know mine. But he maintained that he doesn't really know what he wants when I asked."

"Do you think that's true, or does he just say that so he doesn't have to answer?"

Louis blinked, sitting up. "I never thought of that. He would do that, wouldn't he?"

Shrugging, Liam replied, "I'm not too sure anymore what to think. I just go with the moment."

"I kind of envy you that. You just do what feels right and don't worry about the consequences."

"Most of the time, yeah. If you can do something about it, do it. If you can't, it's not worth worrying about. You never know when life's gonna surprise you, totally slap you across the face and say 'Hey, guess what? You were wrong all along.' So why worry about it?"

"Liam," Louis smiled, "I have never known anyone like you. Promise me that no matter what happens, I'll still have you in my life."

Liam returned Louis' smile, staring at him for a few seconds before hinting, "I'm cold."

"Yeah?"

"Yeah. These blankets are worthless."

Louis chuckled and moved off of Niall's bed, turning off the light before cuddling up behind Liam and pulling him close. "Better?"

"Much."

When Niall stepped out of the bathroom, the light pouring from behind him was just bright enough for him to make out two bodies asleep in Liam's bed. He slid into his own bed as quietly as he could, sighing as his mind replayed the moments he'd shared with Harry tonight and wondering if he really would get any more alone time with him.

"He was cold."

The voice startled Niall. "I'm sorry?"

"Liam. He was cold."

Niall chuckled. "Sure he was. He's grown really attached to you, you know."

"Yeah, I know." Louis cuddled Liam closer. "I'm going to miss him when we have to say goodbye."

"I remind you again that one day Harry will see this and it might look... you know."

"I know," Louis repeated. "But it's nothing more than two friends who adore each other. If Harry can't handle that, then he's not the guy for me or Liam."

"Are you saying it wouldn't bother you? To see Harry cuddled up with a guy like that? Even one who's just a friend?"

"Harry... yes. It would probably bother me. But only because I know he's not the kind of guy to cuddle with a friend. He's not nearly as open and touchy-feely as Liam is. And since he knows Liam is like that, he shouldn't have a problem with it."

"Shouldn't, but that doesn't mean he wouldn't. If I was him, it would bother me."

"Yes, but you're you."

"Which means?"

"I don't know, you're just you. And Harry is Harry. And Liam? He's... "

"What?"

"He's just... Liam. You know?"

Niall wasn't sure he did, but he nodded anyway. "When they split us up into two rooms, I imagine you'll want to room with him?"

"I... wow. I don't know, I hadn't thought about it."

"It's okay if you do," Niall assured Louis. "I'll understand. Liam needs someone."

"And you don't?"

"Not the way he does. I'm used to being alone."

"So is Liam."

"Not really, he's got the dogs."

"And you've got Nola."

"It's different, Louis. I'm just saying that if you choose to room with him, I'll understand. Something tells me he'd find a way to sneak into your room anyway."

Louis laughed softly. "He's so adorable."

"That's one word for it."

They were quiet for a while, Niall almost asleep when Louis asked, "What did you and Harry talk about tonight?"

"Nola. We um... we called her."

Dead silence, and then, "Harry talked to her?"

"On the phone, yes."

"Wow."

"Yeah."

"And uh... how was that?"

"It was nice. They talked about Disney movies and meerkats."

"What's a meerkat?"

"It's an animal. Like Timon from _The Lion King_?"

"Ah. Okay."

More silence, and then Niall asked, "What did you and Harry argue about?"

Louis hesitated before saying, "My jealousy. It got out of hand tonight."

"Oh."

"Yeah."

"And he liked that? The fact that you were jealous?"

"No," Louis replied. "I don't think he liked that at all."

"Oh," Niall said again, his heart racing as he remembered Harry's reaction to his own jealousy.

"Well. Goodnight, Niall."

"Goodnight, Louis."

They laid awake for a long time, each of them turning over the conversation in their heads and wondering what it all meant as Liam slept peacefully in Louis' arms.


	18. Chapter 18

Their first day back in Los Angeles was uneventful for everyone except Mike, who snagged the first one-on-one date. There would be one more of those, plus a group date, and three were to be eliminated this week. That would leave only six, and while Liam, Louis, and Niall, were happy for Mike finally getting his moment with Harry, the fear of being eliminated was more intense than ever.

The three were allowed to keep their original sleeping arrangements, all of them relieved because they knew that wouldn't last much longer, even if they _were_ kept for another week. They spent the day around the pool, none of them minding Ryan's presence among their group because they knew he was terrified Mike wasn't going to return, and they did what they could to distract him. It was true they didn't want to see Mike go, either, but someone had to, and the truth was if it wasn't him, it might be one of them.

The only eventful occurrence on that day was the arrival of the group date card, which was given to Jerry, Ryan, Max, Austin, and Jared. This meant either Liam, Niall, or Louis would be receiving the other one-on-one date, and they were pretty sure it wouldn't be Louis. Liam seemed a bit smug about the whole thing and finally admitted that Harry had hinted he would be getting a date this week, the other two unable to be angry with him.

"Don't worry, buddy," Louis said to Niall, sliding an arm over his shoulders. "Chris said there are still two more one-on-one dates next week. He'll probably pick you for one of those."

Niall could only hope.

Mike returned late that night with both a rose and a huge grin, excited about the amazing time he'd had with Harry. Ryan took Mike off to their room and the three headed for bed, Niall falling asleep quickly while Liam and Louis stayed awake playing a game on Liam's hand-held system. Niall's last vision was of the two of them cuddled up in Liam's bed, Louis shushing Liam for being too loud when he scored something big.

The following day was more of the same, this time Mike being the one to hang out with them. Liam did indeed receive the next date card, the clue confusing even Niall when Mike read it out loud. "Let me entertain you with the happiest place to race to the sky. Liam."

"What the hell does that mean?" Niall asked.

Rather than his usual excitement over being named for a date, Liam fretted, "Guys, what if I'm one of those he's taking out for a final chance with? To see if there's any reason to keep me?"

Niall shook his head. "I doubt it, Liam. He likes you. A lot."

"Yeah, but he likes all the other guys, too, or they wouldn't still be here."

"You got this, buddy." Louis dragged Liam in with one arm, ruffling his hair. "Just show him a good time."

Everyone returned from the group date, Ryan bearing the rose. This meant that both Ryan and Mike were safe from elimination, which left only four others besides themselves as candidates to be sent home at the next rose ceremony. Louis and Niall were pretty confident they'd get a rose, especially since neither would have a chance to screw things up this week since there was no opportunity to inflame Harry into an argument.

When Niall voiced this out loud, Liam laughed. "Don't sell yourselves short. You've still got the cocktail party, you could say something stupid there."

Knowing better than to chuck his pillow at Liam this time, Louis simply shoved him down onto the bed. "Just for that, you get to cuddle with Alex P. Keaton tonight. I'm sleeping in my own bed."

"No, you're not."

"I am. If you get lonely, grab Elyse, too."

"Dude, I can't make Alex cuddle with his mom. That's just gross."

"Whatever. You should think before you speak, this was probably your last opportunity to share a bed with me. Ever."

Liam shrugged as if it was no big deal. "I'm getting some sleep now, guys. Chris said I'll probably get an early start in the morning."

"Goodnight," they both chorused, and when Niall next glanced over Liam was still standing there staring at them, but he looked devastated. "Liam, what's wrong?"

Louis frowned and was there in a flash, tilting Liam's chin up with a finger. "What?"

"It's just... I might be gone tomorrow. What if Harry comes to get me like he did Louis and we didn't even really say goodbye and then I don't come back and-"

"Hey," Louis soothed, hugging Liam tight. "This is hard for us, too, okay? It's not that we don't care, we're just not very good at goodbyes. It's easier to not think about it."

"But you _have_ to think about it," Liam stated, voice thickening with tears. "We might never see each other again."

"Liam, you know better." Niall stepped up to them, Louis opening his arms to include Niall in the embrace. "We promise, we're gonna talk when this is all over. I already told Nola about you, and she can't wait to show you her favorite horse at the stables we visit."

"Really?"

"Really." Niall smiled and kissed Liam on the cheek. "It won't be right away, Louis said they'll probably make us stay out of contact with each other until the winner is known to the public, but we're certainly not going to forget each other, are we?"

"But what if Harry decides he doesn't want us to be friends, after all?"

Louis shook his head. "That's not gonna happen. He's more likely to eliminate all of us and choose someone else so that we don't lose this friendship. Trust me, Liam, the one thing we can count on after this is all said and done is the three of us. I'm gonna be going crazy worrying about you."

"Aww. You do love me."

Louis chuckled. "As if there was any doubt." He kissed Liam's temple, then squeezed tighter. "And if for some weird reason Harry did choose me and told me he didn't want me speaking to you, it's him that would go—not you. Because I don't let my lovers dictate who I talk to and hang out with. That shit doesn't fly with me."

"So just go out there tomorrow and have fun with Harry," Niall instructed. "Enjoy your time with him and know that no matter what happens afterward, you have our numbers and we both swear not to change them. And don't forget, we know where to find you. Nola loves hot dogs."

"I would've pegged her as a vegetarian," Louis mused. "I'm surprised she eats animals."

"She hasn't made that connection yet, Louis. Don't rush it."

They all laughed before breaking apart and sliding into their own beds, Liam cuddling his monkey close and falling into a troubled sleep. Niall heard him tossing and turning over the next hour, and sure enough, when he awoke in the middle of the night to use the bathroom, Liam was once again sleeping peacefully in Louis' arms.

* * *

This time it was Liam who was awakened by a flashlight to the face, Harry shaking him with a bright grin. "Come on, get up! We have an adventure to go on!" he whispered.

Liam was awake immediately, his own smile challenging Harry's in size. "Where are we going?" he squealed.

"Shh. Don't wake them up. Just get dressed and meet me out front as soon as you can."

Liam rushed through the motions, wondering if he'd dreamed Louis climbing into bed with him. He'd noticed Alex on the floor when he rose, which led him to believe it hadn't been a dream, but then why did Louis go back to his own bed? Either way, he was grateful because no matter how much he said otherwise, there was a tiny part of him that feared Harry wouldn't understand.

Harry waited for him in a limo, Liam excited as he hadn't ridden in one since the first date in the snow, which seemed like forever ago. "Do I need to wear anything special?"

"Nah, you're good. Just get in, we have a lot to do today!"

Liam obeyed, bouncing in his seat once the car pulled away. "I'm so excited! Thank you for picking me!"

"It's not a hardship, Liam," Harry chuckled. "I love spending time with you."

"That's a good thing. Where are we going?"

"You mean Niall didn't figure out the clues this time?"

"No, he was confused for once. Nice job!"

"I try," Harry laughed. "Okay, first stop is breakfast. My favorite burger place, open all night. Prepare to give your taste buds an orgasm."

Liam lifted an eyebrow. "Better than my dogs?"

"Hmm. That's debatable."

Liam declared the burgers a close second to his dogs, Harry agreeing after eating one. "You've ruined me. I'm going to be craving your hot dogs all the time now."

"Guess you'll just have to marry me so that I can cook them for you every day."

"Yeah, yeah. You've never been to Hollywood, right?"

"Never! Do I get to see famous people?"

"Um, excuse me. You're looking at one."

"Yeah, but you're just Harry. And I like you that way."

Harry smiled, hugging Liam close as they walked to the limo. "I like that you don't think of me as a celebrity. I'm just a normal guy to you, aren't I?"

"I didn't say that. You're the hottest guy I've ever seen."

"That's always nice to hear. I can't promise any famous people, it's only six A.M. But we'll see what we can find."

Together they walked Hollywood Boulevard, Liam in awe as they traversed the Walk of Fame and stopped to take pictures of famous hand prints and footprints at Grauman's Chinese Theater.

"This is so cool!" Liam exclaimed, literally stepping into Harry Potter's shoes.

"Wait until you see this."

Harry took Liam's hand and led him back to the sidewalk, dragging him along and reading the names on the stars. He finally stopped, putting his hands over Liam's eyes. "Okay, you ready for this?"

"Yes!"

"You sure?"

"Dude, yes! What is it?"

Beaming, Harry lowered his hands and waited for Liam to see it. Liam glanced around, finding nothing of importance, then his eyes traveled down. Harry knew the moment Liam spotted it; his mouth gaped wide open, his eyes threatened to bug out of his head, and rather than scream in excitement, he dropped to his knees, his voice hushed as he ran his hand over the name. "No way," he whispered.

"Way."

"Oh my god."

Harry grinned down at Liam, pleased with himself. "Turn around, kneel next to it. Let me take your picture."

Liam did, Harry whipping out a camera to capture Liam kneeling over the name "Henry Winkler." When he was done, Liam passed over his camera for a picture as well.

"You gonna be okay?" Harry chuckled.

"I can't believe it. The Fonz. Harry, this is the coolest thing anyone has ever done for me."

"Aww. Come here." Harry pulled Liam up off his knees and hugged him close. "I'm glad I can make you smile."

"You do. You always do. This was a dream come true. The only thing better would be meeting him."

"I actually tried to set that up," Harry said softly. "But with the short notice, it didn't happen."

"You did?"

"Yeah."

"Harry, how are you so cool?"

"It's just a matter of knowing what you like. I couldn't give you everything I wanted to today, but I tried. Speaking of which, we don't have a lot of time. Just enough to find Mrs. Cunningham and Richie, if you want."

Gaping again, Liam stood away from Harry. "Are you serious?"

"Yep, they're both here somewhere. And I have a handy dandy map to their stars."

"Let's go!"

Once back in the limo, Liam snuggled up to Harry. "I can't believe it! That was the coolest thing ever!"

"I'm happy you had fun. And it's only seven, we've still got the whole day ahead of us."

"What's next?"

"More fun."

Their next stop was go-karting. The place had opened up early just for the two of them, and Harry commented that while it wasn't Nascar, it was the best he could do at the moment. Liam was happy enough with that, the two acting like children as they sped around each other and called out insults, much like Harry and Louis had but giggling the entire time. Harry took two races, Liam three, and when they once again returned to the limo, Liam was on top of the world.

"I totally let you win that last one," Harry stated.

"You did not, you're such a liar! I'm just better than you. Eat it and weep, Harry."

"Eat it and weep? That's a new one."

"Yeah, I kind of made that up years ago. I tell my brother that all the time. What's next?"

"We're not going far. Ever been skydiving?"

Liam's jaw dropped. "Are you fucking kidding me? We're going skydiving?"

"Again, I couldn't give you the full experience, but I did the best I could. It's indoor skydiving."

"Oh my god, that is so cool! How are you so awesome?"

"Keep in mind that every day with me wouldn't be like this, Liam. You'd be working a lot, right?"

"Yeah," Liam replied, pouting. "I do miss it. It's chaos, but... it's my kind of chaos. What if I win? Would you move to New York?"

"Yes."

Liam blinked at the lack of hesitation in the response. "Seriously?"

"Yes. I'd miss L.A. but I've already decided that no matter who wins, I'm moving where they are. I have the kind of job where I can live anywhere I want. Most of you guys don't."

"And you're willing to do that? Just pick and move to live with us?"

"As long as I get to bring my horse along, absolutely."

"What about your friend? Wouldn't you miss her?"

"I would, a lot. But she can't give me what I need, and she'd understand. In fact, she'd push me out the door."

"I hope I get to meet her, Harry. She sounds pretty amazing."

"She is," Harry smiled, but gave no hints as to the likelihood of that happening.

Indoor skydiving was a blast, and afterward they strolled the Universal CityWalk for an hour, Harry buying Liam a few souvenirs as well as matching hats for both of them. They stopped for lunch before Harry led Liam to an unmarked building, riding the elevator to the roof level where Liam was once again blown away—a helicopter waited for them at the top.

"I get a helicopter, too?" Bouncing in excitement, Liam dragged Harry down for a kiss, Harry laughing through most of it.

"It's the best way to beat traffic around here."

"You did it because you knew I wanted it."

"Maybe."

It was Liam's first helicopter ride, Harry simply sitting back and watching him as they flew through the air. Liam pointed out random landmarks as they passed over, Harry smiling at his exuberance, and when Liam gasped suddenly, Harry looked down to see a huge white mountain below.

"I know that mountain! That's the Matterhorn! Harry, look! Look! It's Disneyland!"

"You don't say."

"Yes! Look, there's the castle! And that big Ferris wheel, that's at the California park, right? Dude, it's got Mickey Mouse on it!"

"So it does."

When Liam turned to look at Harry, spying the smirk on his face, he whispered, "You're taking me to Disneyland."

Harry busted up, hugging Liam close. "Only if you want to go. We can do something else if you'd rather," he teased.

"Hell no! I've always wanted to go to Disneyland!" The helicopter lowered to the ground, Liam frowning when they stepped out. "It looks... deserted."

"That's because it's closed. I could only get us half the day, they lose too much money otherwise, but we have the rest of the afternoon and evening at our disposal. No lines for the rides, the best seats for the parade if you want to see it, and a fireworks show just for us." When Liam looked as if he was going to cry, Harry became concerned. "What's wrong?"

"Nothing, you're just... so amazing. I don't ever want this to end."

Harry melted, pulling Liam close after they stepped out of the helicopter. "Stay close to me. I like having you near."

Other than running off when he saw something he couldn't help rushing toward, Liam did keep close. They rode every ride Liam had ever wanted to, pigged out on food, and let it settle while walking around the California park and seeing the attractions. "Can we go on the Ferris wheel?" Liam begged.

"Of course."

Dark had fallen by that time, the two admiring the view from above. For once Liam was quiet, content to simply enjoy the moment while snuggled up to Harry.

"You having fun?" Harry asked.

"Duh. You?"

"Absolutely. So if I asked you to stay another week, think we might make that happen?"

Liam glanced up with a smile, Harry chuckling as he pulled a rose out of his pocket. "Will you accept this rose?"

Burying his face in Harry's chest, Liam clung to him.

"Is that a yes?"

"Yes," he whispered. "Yes."

"Why are you shaking?"

"I was so afraid I wouldn't make it back tonight."

"Liam, haven't you figured out yet how much you mean to me? I can't go around saying it all the time, but you know, right? You get it? How special you are?"

"Not really, no. But the rose helps. So does a kiss."

"Of course," Harry laughed, rolling his eyes. He fastened the rose to Liam's shirt, then kissed him softly as the Ferris wheel started to move again, lowering them to the ground. When they'd stepped out, Harry asked, "Is there anything else you'd really like to do while we're here?"

"Can we stay for fireworks?"

"Sure, we'll see them no matter where we are in the parks." Harry started walking with no specific destination in mind, Liam's hand in his.

"Cool. I did see some carnival games when we were on the Ferris wheel, and I still need Jennifer and Mallory. Think you could win me a few more prizes?"

"I know I can," Harry grinned. "Who are Jennifer and Mallory?"

"Oh, from 'Family Ties.' I named the cheetah and the monkey after that show."

"Did you really?"

"Yeah. And the dog you won me is Joanie. Because she's a dog and fits in with my other clan."

"Liam, you are like no one I've ever met."

Liam raised an eyebrow, suspicious. "That's not an insult, is it?"

"Of course not." Harry hugged Liam to him as they continued toward the midway.

"Because Louis says that, too, and sometimes I wonder."

"Louis adores you, I'm sure you must know that."

"He stole Joanie."

"The dog? Is that why you ran out of the room screaming in Las Vegas?"

"Yep. I can't find her, not anywhere, and it's crazy because there are only so many places she could be. He keeps moving her."

"Smart."

By the time Harry and Liam reboarded the helicopter, Liam had two new friends to keep Alex and Elyse company. Surprisingly he fell asleep on the ride back to the mansion, Harry's arm around him to keep him close, and only stirred when Harry's lips pressed against his hair while the chopper was landing.

"Time to wake up, Sleeping Beauty. Only you could sleep during a helicopter ride."

Liam rubbed his eyes. "Aww, you really think I'm beautiful?"

"Absolutely. Thank you for the funnest date I've had yet."

"Really? Even more fun than Nascar?"

"Yes, Liam. Because you make everything more fun just by being there. And don't you dare go telling Louis I said my date with you was better, because that's not what I'm saying. One of you isn't better or worse, you're just different."

"It's okay, Harry, I know you're not allowed to admit I'm better. I'll just pretend you did."

For the millionth time that day, Harry shook his head and laughed. "I do love hanging out with you, I will say that."

"So uh... this is it? No more one-on-one dates for me, right?"

"I can't promise anything, Liam. I'm sorry."

"I know. But today was magical. One of the best days of my life, Harry. No matter what happens when this is over, I want to make sure you know that to me, you're the perfect guy. Today was the perfect date and I'll remember it forever." Leaning in, Liam met Harry's lips with his own, Harry returning the kiss with a hand on Liam's cheek. "Goodnight, Harry. Thank you for today."

"You're very welcome. Did you grab Jennifer and Mallory?"

"Oh! Thanks!"

"And don't forget your hat. It's in the bag with the other stuff."

"Got it! Night, Harry!"

"Goodnight, Liam. I'll see you tomorrow at the party, okay? Save a dance for me."

"You know it." Liam leaned in one more time after stepping out of the helicopter, planting another kiss on Harry's lips. "See you tomorrow!"

"Definitely," Harry grinned. "Goodnight."

* * *

Liam picked up his luggage just inside the front door and rolled it to their room, using his foot to bang on the door because his hands were full. He had no doubt Louis and Niall would be awake even though it was late.

The door was opened in three seconds by Louis, who greeted Liam with a huge smile and an even bigger hug. "Hey, buddy!"

"Hey! Here, take this."

Louis accepted the proffered bags while Liam entered and parked his luggage, Niall standing to close the door behind him. "Welcome back. Told you he wouldn't send you home."

"Nah, I guess you guys were right. I told him that I was afraid he would and he said I'm really special to him and I should have figured that out by now."

Niall smiled. "You are special. I mean that in a multitude of ways."

"Yeah, from you it's an insult."

"Only partly," Niall teased.

Louis was going through the bags as he stood by the door. "You got more animals?"

"I did! Meet Jennifer and Mallory. Jennifer's the owl."

"I told you I'd win you some when I get a chance."

"Well, Harry got the chance first. Who cares who wins them for me? Except for the fact that it's Harry and he's _awesome._ " Liam sighed happily and crashed onto his bed, kicking off his shoes. "I had so much fun, you guys! Harry is freaking amazing!"

"So what all did you do?" Niall settled onto his bed, Louis dropping the bags next to Liam before sitting on his own bed up against the headboard and pulling the covers up to his shoulders.

"Gosh, what _didn't_ we do? Seriously, it was like the best day ever! We had breakfast at this place he loves, super yummy burgers. Then we went to Hollywood! Oh my god, you guys, look!" Liam jumped up again and found his camera, scrolling through the pictures he'd taken until he came across his favorite. He rushed over to Niall, who squinted and then laughed.

"Henry Winkler. That's pretty cool, Liam."

"Isn't it? Louis, look!"

Liam ran around his own bed to Louis', showing him the picture. "It's The Fonz, dude! And Harry said he actually tried to help me meet him! How is he so cool?"

"Wow, he was gonna do that? What happened?"

"He couldn't set it up on such short notice, but he tried. That's what matters to me, he totally knows how to make me happy and tried to do it. Dude, isn't the picture awesome?"

"Sure is, Liam. What else did you do?" Louis snagged the camera and started scrolling through the pictures while Liam settled on the edge of his bed and continued his story.

"So we did the Hollywood tourist thing, and then we raced go-karts. I won, by the way. And if he tries to tell you he let me win the last race, he's full of shit. I won that fair and square."

Niall chuckled. "Whatever you say."

"And then we went to Universal Studios! Well, not the park itself, but the CityWalk. He bought me some stuff, look at my hat!" Liam was up again, rooting through the bags and pulling out his souvenirs. "Harry has a matching one."

Louis glanced over for a moment before returning his attention to camera. "You sure got a lot of pictures of the two of you together."

"Duh! We had to pose in front of all the cool stuff. Did you see the one of us with Goofy? He's my favorite character, you know."

"Of course he is," Niall smiled, but then he frowned. "Where did you meet Goofy?"

"Well, after the indoor skydiving, we-"

"Indoor what? Liam, how did you guys have time for all this?"

"That's why he came to get me so early, Niall! So we could do it all. He said there were a lot of things he wished he could do for me but he couldn't, like actual skydiving and the Nascar thing, but we had to make do with what we had time for. So we did indoor skydiving, which is _amazing_ , by the way. And then? He took me to Disneyland. Just like on our date with him, Louis, they closed the park and it was only the two of us for half the day. And it was romantic, we rode the Ferris wheel and he gave me the rose at the top, and we saw fireworks, and he won me Jennifer and Mallory, and I don't even know how to contain all these feelings, I just love him so much! I think I might actually have a chance at winning this, guys!"

"I keep telling you, Liam," Louis said softly as he handed the camera over to Liam. "You're amazing. He would be lucky to have you."

"Can you imagine our life together? We'd laugh all the time, and it would be hard with me working a lot but he's got his own thing going, right? Just like you said, Louis, he's everything I need. Just everything. And when we did get together it would be so much fun, my boys would love him, and I can't wait for my mom to meet him, and my sister will be a jerk to him but that's how my sister is, she's just a bitch sometimes, but her husband will yell at her and I can't even wait! Why can't it already be over so I have him all to myself?" Liam fell back onto Louis' bed, a long sigh of contentment leaving him, and neither Louis nor Niall had the heart to remind him that he might not win.

"It's late, we should get some sleep."

"Niall, how can I sleep right now? I just had the best day of my life!"

"Well, I need sleep. If you want to go kill some of that energy, there's always the pool. I bet the other guys are still out there."

"Nah, I don't want to go anywhere. I do need a shower, though. You guys need to use the bathroom first?"

Both shook their heads, and after picking out a change of clothes, Liam disappeared into the bathroom. The sudden quiet seemed deafening once his exuberance was gone.

"Let me see those pictures," Niall said.

Louis tossed him the camera, then picked up each souvenir in turn and looked at it. "Did he say matching hats?"

"Yeah, probably like the shirts Harry and I got in San Francisco. We probably all have matching something with him."

"I don't."

Glancing to his left, Niall bit his lip. "Doesn't mean you're any less special, Louis. There's no doubt he's into you."

"I know." Louis picked up Jennifer and Mallory, studying them but not really seeing them as his mind worked.

"What did they do, stop and take a picture every five seconds? They're so cheesy."

"Yeah." After tossing the animals and bags over to Liam's bed, Louis said, "Tell me something. Just between me and you, and I want an honest answer."

"Okay, go for it." Niall was still flipping through pictures, smiling occasionally.

"Would you say I have a good chance at winning? The way things stand now?"

"Yes. I mean, I can't know what all goes on between you guys, but yeah. I'd say you're a top contender."

"And what about you? Think you're up there, too?"

"Honestly? Yes. If you want the truth, the feeling I get is you and I are the favorites. Of course, we have no idea what he and Ryan have together, so maybe it's the three of us."

Louis nodded. "Exactly. Do you really see Liam winning?"

Niall set the camera down, speaking only after looking toward the bathroom door and hearing the shower running. "I really don't know. When those two are together, it's more like... I don't know. Two big kids."

"Right? And I don't get the feeling Harry is looking for a buddy. I think he needs more than that, and he knows it."

Niall frowned. "What's your point?"

"My point," Louis answered, voice rising, "is that he's going to break Liam's heart. You and I both know Liam isn't going to win this thing, and Harry has to know that, too, but he's got Liam all excited and in love and when he sends Liam home, who's there to pick up the pieces? Nobody. Because we'll still be here and it's going to be torture."

"Louis, his mom will be there for him. He's got family. He'll be okay."

"Not necessarily. You know what I heard? Ryan was telling me that we don't actually get to go home right away if we're eliminated. I think in your case that might be different, I don't know, but when we signed the contract there was that part about us willingly giving up six to eight weeks of our time, and I think they keep us here until it's over. Which means Liam would be stuck with all the other guys who were eliminated and not have us near to watch out for him."

"That doesn't make sense. If that was the case, the other guys would all be here."

"I don't know, maybe they put them somewhere else. All I'm saying is, he'd have no one."

"Okay, there are two things I want you to remember, Louis. Are you listening?"

Louis sighed, sensing a lecture coming on. He laid down on his side, not wanting to hear it, but of course listening anyway. "Yes, go on."

"Okay, first. We all came into this knowing our chances of winning were slim. Even Liam. Once he comes down from his high, he'll remember that again. Sure, right now he's excited and positive he's going to win, but once he sees Harry around everyone else tomorrow night at the ceremony, it'll all come crashing down."

"I know, and I hate that. It makes me want to kill Harry for getting his hopes up like that."

"Dude, for all we know, Liam could still win. He's a great guy."

"I'm aware of that, Niall. Did you not hear what I said to him earlier?"

"I heard, but we can't ever assume either of us is going to be the one Harry chooses. I still feel pretty good about my chances, but now Mike's closer to him than before, and after the group date he knows those guys better, and of course Ryan was there, too. And got the rose. Each time there's another date, things shift. Liam might've won him over completely today. We just don't know."

"But can you really see Harry making him happy?"

"Yes, I can. I think Harry would spend the rest of his life making Liam happy. That's the kind of person Harry is. He comes off full of himself, but once you get inside his heart you find a generous, compassionate man who would do anything for the love of his life. That's rare."

"It's not as rare as you think, Niall. There are other guys out there who would do that for Liam."

"Look, you asked me a question, and that's my answer. Yes, Harry would make him happy. I honestly don't know that Liam would make Harry happy, but again—we don't know what he's thinking. Now, my second point is that Liam is a grown man. He's built an entire business from the ground up, runs it well enough that it's expanded into restaurants all over the state of New York, and when he wants to, he can be a mature guy. We've seen that side of him occasionally. We haven't seen a lot of it, because he has no responsibilities here, but we know it's there and we know he's used to being alone. Of course it'll hurt if Harry doesn't choose him, but he won't let it ruin him. He'll bounce back pretty quick, I think. He's apparently been that way his whole life, and he's lived this many years without us holding his hand. If he gets sent home, Louis, he'll survive. That's what you need to remember. You're always so worried about everyone else, and that's admirable, but don't let your feelings for Liam influence your feelings for Harry. Remember that whoever Harry ends up with is hopefully the one he's meant to be with, leaving the rest of us open for the right guy when he does come along. Liam will find the man he's meant to be with, even if it's not Harry."

"But he'll be devastated in the meantime, Niall. I can't handle that."

"You have to. I'm not judging you guys or anything, but I think you've let yourself get too attached to him. When you're more worried about his feelings than Harry's, that's a problem."

Louis rolled over onto his back with a sigh. "I didn't say I care more about him than Harry."

"I know, but you said you'd want to kill Harry for hurting Liam. Knowing full well that everyone here will get hurt eventually, except of course the winner, that's the risk we take. Liam has put his heart into this completely, which is scary but just how he is, and he knows he might not win. He _knows_ it, Louis. You can't save him from that pain. And I think maybe you need to work on distancing yourself from him a little. It's only going to drive you insane once we're all separated if you keep torturing yourself with worry about him. And whatever you do, don't give Harry attitude for getting Liam's hopes up. That'll just piss him off and get you sent home sooner."

The bathroom door flew open and Liam bounded out, obviously still on his high. "You guys are still awake? I thought you were tired, Niall."

"I am, we were just talking. Going to sleep now, though. I'm glad you had so much fun today, Liam."

"I did, it was just so incredible. I can't wait to see him again tomorrow night. We hardly kissed today, I was thinking about that in the shower. He owes me." After tossing his dirty clothes onto the floor, Liam stretched out on his bed. "He's so amazing, guys."

Niall got up to turn off the lights, sliding into bed with his mind on the following night and the chance to see Harry again. Nola had been asking about him every day since their phone call, and he wondered if Harry would be willing to talk to her for just a few minutes. It scared him a little, that she was already excited about someone she might never get to meet, but he knew he had to allow Harry in at some point if this was going to work.

"Louis, did you cuddle with me last night?"

Liam's question came out of nowhere, Louis remaining silent for five seconds before replying, "No."

"Weird. Guess I dreamed it."

Niall sighed, not too sure why Louis was lying but staying out of it. Maybe this was Louis' way of distancing himself. "Goodnight, guys."

"Night, Niall," Liam called out. "Night, Louis."

"Goodnight, Liam."

Liam fell asleep almost immediately, but Niall heard Louis tossing and turning deep into the night and hoped that when the sun came up, Louis' head would be in the right place.


	19. Chapter 19

For once Harry seemed a bit subdued at the cocktail party, and Niall imagined it must be weighing heavy on him, knowing he had to say goodbye to three more contestants tonight. He was tempted to steal Harry away and get him talking, but each time their eyes met Harry would smile at him with the silent promise that he'd get his moment, and Niall had to be content with that.

Louis' apparent resolve to distance himself from Liam had lasted all of two hours that morning, Louis seeming to crumble after repeated comments like "Louis, what's wrong with you? You're not yourself. Did I do something wrong?" Niall saw it when Louis caved, unable to withstand Liam's constant attacks of affection. He picked Liam up off his feet and threw him into the pool, laughing as Liam spluttered to the surface.

"What the hell was that for?"

"Because I can," Louis grinned, toes gripping the lip of the pool as he smiled down at Liam.

"Oh yeah? Look what I can do." Liam jumped up out of the water and wrapped his legs around Louis' knees, pulling Louis down as he sank back under the surface.

Now Niall shook his head as Liam ran past him, Louis on his heels and wanting revenge for who knew what. Niall knew exactly what Liam was doing, knew Louis was a little nervous tonight about being eliminated and that Liam was purposely keeping his mind off it, and when he looked around at the other guys and counted only four others besides himself and Louis who were on the chopping block (as Liam, Ryan, and Mike were safe), his own nerves creeped up. What if things had changed so much between Harry and the other guys that Niall now paled in comparison? Why didn't he have a buddy to distract him the way Louis did?

Suddenly Harry was there, an arm sliding around Niall from behind as he stood staring out the patio door. "May I steal you for a bit?"

Relief washed over Niall both at the touch and the voice, which held so much affection and warmth. He leaned back into Harry's strength, eyes closed and simply enjoying the feel of Harry near. "Please."

Not removing his arm, Harry steered Niall into a small room and closed the door, gently spinning Niall to face him before their lips met, and it was as if no time had passed at all since their last kiss. They savored each touch, drawing it out as a slow burn flared in Niall's body, the familiar ache pulling him to Harry as always. "Missed you," Niall whispered between kisses.

Harry nodded, not ready to bring the moment to an end just yet as he licked his way into Niall's mouth. Niall's hands ran up Harry's shirt, fingers tangling in his hair, and Harry whined softly as he pressed closer to Niall, palms flat to the wall over Niall's shoulders. The kiss became wet fire, Niall feeling like he was about to combust, and when he slowly slid down the wall Harry went with him, falling to his knees and pulling Niall onto his lap so they were lined up just right.

"Oh god, Harry," Niall whispered, barely able to catch his breath and not caring if he ever did again. All fears of elimination were erased with each touch, every shift of Harry's body against his own one more promise that Niall was here to stay. "Promise me," he begged, "promise me I'll get at least one night with you, just one night to remember forever, to hold in my heart as the perfect night with the perfect man."

Rather than answer, Harry trailed his lips down Niall's neck, sucking lightly at spots that drove Niall even more wild, and he was almost in tears from the frustration of not being able to do anything more. Harry was so perfect, why did he have to be so perfect? Niall's arms slid around Harry's neck and held him close as the fire continued to spread, Harry's mouth alone bringing him to the edge of orgasm. "Harry, you have to stop or follow through, I can't stand this."

Then Harry's lips were covering his again, the kiss slow and sensual and fanning the flames so high Niall's hips moved without his command, a moan escaping into Harry's mouth. Rough hands slid Niall off and onto the floor, Niall silently thanking God because he'd been about to burst, but then his zipper was being lowered and he gasped when a warm hand slipped into his boxers and wrapped him in the heat he always seemed to crave so badly in Harry's presence. "Please," he begged again, not caring about cameras that might be watching them, not caring about rules or any kind of contest, just needing release and knowing Harry could quench the fire. He slipped his arms around Harry's shoulders, holding on tight as Harry's hand moved slowly in a perfect rhythm, and when he came Harry buried the cries with his mouth, taking in each sound and swallowing it down until it mingled with his own breaths, which meshed with Niall's until they were breathing into each other as if giving life.

Niall's head fell back against the wall as he panted, licking his lips and attempting to slow his heart rate. Harry's eyes had gone deep green again in that way Niall knew meant he was smoldering inside, but what he said was, "You're so beautiful."

All Niall could do was kiss him, because there were so many emotions rushing to the surface and bringing declarations of love to the tip of his tongue, but he didn't allow himself to say any of it. Instead he stifled it against Harry's mouth, letting his lips say what he didn't dare to out loud, and when Harry finally did sit back onto his heels, Niall managed, "It's you who's beautiful. On the inside as well. I don't know who's going to be lucky enough to win your heart, but I pray he realizes every day how blessed he is to have you."

After a few seconds Harry stood up suddenly, turning away to find a box of tissues before kneeling again to clean up what he could of the mess Niall had made. "Might need to change your pants. I'm sorry."

"Don't be. I'm not."

Harry grinned, laughing softly as he ran a thumb over Niall's lips. "That wasn't supposed to happen."

"I know."

"I brought you in here to talk."

"Suuuuuure."

Harry laughed again, head thrown back before he pulled Niall into his arms for a tight hug. "I really did want to talk. Tonight's been hard on me and I knew you'd calm me down."

"I certainly managed to distract you for five minutes."

"You always do," Harry smiled. He stood once again and tossed the tissues into a trash can, then helped Niall up off the floor, waiting for Niall to zip up. "I actually wanted to call Nola, but I don't think we have time now."

"It's okay. But she has been asking about you."

"Really?"

Niall grinned at the way Harry's face had lit up. "Yeah. I told her you'd call if you had time, but that you're very busy. She understands busy."

"I have a surprise for her."

Stunned, Niall blinked at Harry. "A what?"

"A surprise. I'll have to make sure you get it, in case I don't get to meet her. But don't forget to tell her it's from me, okay?"

"Of course not. What is it?"

"I told you. It's a surprise." Harry reached out to open the door, then hesitated, pulling Niall close enough to untuck his shirt from his pants. "There. That covers the little bit of mess I couldn't get."

"I have another pair of pants, Harry."

"Yes, in the hall where everyone can see you get into your suitcase. Do you really want to explain why you need a fresh pair of pants?"

"Oh. No, I'd prefer not to. Wait, are we gonna get in trouble for this?"

"For what?"

"You know... what just happened in there. Did we break any rules or anything?"

Harry shrugged. "I wouldn't worry about that. It's not like we had sex."

"I know, but... Harry, tell me something. How far we can actually go without getting in trouble?"

Smirking, Harry dipped his face down to nuzzle Niall's ear. "Want to find out?"

"Not right now, jeez!" Niall stepped away after smacking Harry's chest, his cheeks hurting from the smile that wouldn't die.

"It's not like they're gonna air that on T.V."

"They could, Harry. They could censor it."

"Nope, that's crossing the line into pornography. No sex on broadcast television."

"You just said it wasn't sex."

"Close enough. But if you want, we can close the door and make that happen."

"Harry, enough! You're such a horndog!"

"You want it, though, don't you?" Harry whispered suddenly into Niall's ear, leaving Niall a mass of shuddering limbs in his arms. "Want me inside you, owning you like no one ever has before?"

"Harry," Niall whined, hiding his face in Harry's neck. "Fuck."

"Exactly." Sensing that Niall was overwhelmed, Harry switched tactics. "You're probably going to get glared at when we walk out there."

"So worth it."

Harry grinned again and tilted Niall's chin up for a light kiss. "Glad you think so."

"I hope I get to return the favor sometime."

"I hope so, too," Harry winked, then pulled Niall out of the room.

Niall knew Harry well enough by then to know that was as good as a promise.

* * *

"Do you think they're calling Nola again?"

Louis shrugged, sipping at the strong drink Liam had forced on him after commenting that Louis was entirely too wound up. He leaned back into the loveseat, Liam instinctively sagging against him, and replied, "Probably. If he keeps Niall around, he'll be meeting her in a few weeks. It's a good idea to get to know her a little first, I guess."

"I can't wait to meet her, dude. I bet she has Niall's eyes."

"I saw a picture of her once, or at least a flash of it. She's got blonde hair, and we know that didn't come from Niall."

"So what's going on with you tonight?"

Louis ignored the subject change, downing more liquor.

"Louis, come on. You've been acting weird all day. Is it because of my date last night? You didn't say a lot, and you didn't even cuddle with me. Are you afraid Harry loves me more now?"

"I'm just nervous. I could be sent home, you know."

"Yeah, right. You're not going anywhere. Just relax, you know Harry loves you. Or did you two have another fight?"

"No, I haven't even said two words to him since the party in Vegas."

"Oh, is that what it is? Don't worry, he'll talk to you tonight. Look, there he is right now with Niall. Go grab him before someone else does."

"If he wants to talk to me, he will."

"Really, dude? Since when do you sit back and let something just happen? Get over there and _make_ it happen."

Louis shrugged again, seemingly content to do just that—sit back and let events unfold around him.

Niall made his way to them, smiling as he approached. "Hey, guys. Done running amok?"

"For the moment," Liam replied haughtily. "Did you have a nice talk with your little girl?"

Niall flushed bright red, completely inappropriate to the question, and said, "We didn't call her. We just talked."

"Oh, really? That's why you're redder than a tomato? Because you two just... talked?"

"There might've been a kiss or two," Niall admitted. He dropped into a chair near them and said quietly, "He's got a lot on his mind tonight. I think it's hard, sending three home. Whoever he's saying goodbye to is someone he doesn't want to see go."

"Or three someones," Liam commented. "Man, I am so glad I'm safe. I'd be freaking out right now."

"Imagine next week, when it'll only be six of us left. That's going to be hell."

Louis' eyes narrowed. "You don't seem worried anymore. Did he say something to make you think you're not going home tonight?"

"Not exactly. I just feel reassured after spending a little time with him. It's always nice to know the feelings are still there, you know? He may not talk to you much tonight, Liam. I think he's talking more to the people who don't have roses, making his final decisions."

"That sucks. But I'd want that if it was me. Louis, will you lighten up? You're not going anywhere!"

Suddenly plunking down on the arm of the loveseat, Harry smirked and said, "Actually, I think that's up to me, Liam."

They all looked up, Niall smiling at Harry and happy when Harry gave him a quick smile before addressing the other two. "And please don't take it as an insult, Liam, but I won't be taking you aside tonight. You know you're safe."

"That's cool, even though I feel like you owe me kisses. We didn't do much making out yesterday."

"A travesty I will correct as soon as I get the chance, I assure you. Louis? Can we talk for a few minutes?"

"Of course." Keeping his drink with him, Louis followed Harry out onto the patio, Liam and Niall watching them go.

"I'm worried about Louis. He's been weird all day, like he's really scared he's leaving or something."

"Louis' got a lot on his mind, Liam. Give him some space to think, okay?"

"If he has a lot on his mind, he should talk to me about it. Or at least you. It doesn't do him any good to keep it bottled up inside."

"I know, but let him work through things on his own. Just keep being the supportive friend you have been. It's helped him today."

"I hope so. You don't think he's leaving tonight, do you?"

"No, but we really won't know until the moment's here. I hate these ceremonies, they make us all crazy."

"I heard Mike and Ryan talking earlier, and they were saying the same thing as me. They're really glad they have roses because they can feel it, that Harry is still making up his mind. It's so scary. But you think you're safe, too?"

Remembering the look in Harry's eyes when he'd said Niall was beautiful, Niall smiled. "Yeah, I'm pretty sure. We had some good bonding time in there."

"You mean you made out a lot."

Niall smirked. "Think whatever you want, Liam. But not everything is about sex."

"I still think you made out. You're glowing."

Niall turned away, unable to fight the smile that kept creeping up on his face.

* * *

Harry settled onto a loveseat near the pool, patting his lap. After a moment, Louis sat down and set his drink on a table, facing sideways with his feet on the padded bench and leaning against Harry.

"Long time no see," Harry joked, hugging Louis.

"No kidding. You had a lot of dates this week."

"I did. The group date was pretty stressful."

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, everyone was jealous of Ryan even though I purposely didn't pay him extra attention. He was a good sport about it, though."

"Which is why he got the rose."

"That's one of the reasons, yes. It's also because I happen to like him a lot."

Louis nodded. "He's a great guy. Just kind of... normal, you know?"

"Yeah. He reminds me a little of you in that way. Just a nice, normal guy who's fun to talk to."

"Is that all I am to you, Harry?" Louis teased, kissing his cheek.

"Shut up, you know you're so much more. I can barely keep my hands off you."

"As opposed to Liam, who you hardly kissed at all."

"Of course he told you that."

"Harry, he just said that in the house. Like two minutes ago."

"Oh."

Louis decided not to mention the fact that Liam had also told them that the night before. "But he came back gushing about you and how amazing you are, so I think you impressed him anyway."

Harry chuckled. "We did have a lot of fun. He's such a joy to entertain, you know? He gets so excited over everything, makes you feel like a king just for doing something simple like walking him down Hollywood Boulevard. I laugh so much when I'm with him."

"Same here. He makes me feel like a hero most of the time."

"Louis, why do we always end up talking about everyone else when we get together, instead of about each other?"

Biting his lip, Louis looked over out over the pool rather than at Harry. "I don't know. Maybe I care too much about everyone else and not enough about my own happiness."

"That's my point. I think we need to work on that. You deserve to be happy too, you know?"

"I know I do. But my happiness is in seeing my loved ones happy. If that's a fault, sue me."

"I didn't say it was a fault, Louis. I just think you need to allow yourself to experience things without constantly worrying about how it affects everyone else. If I kissed you right now, you'd feel bad for hurting the other contestants who might see, wouldn't you?"

Louis shrugged. "Not all of them."

"But enough. What happened to the Louis who sat in this very spot and made out with me the second week, who didn't even think about anyone else when I kissed him? Is he still in there somewhere?"

"Yes, Harry, of course."

"Prove it."

"Everyone's stressed out enough as it is, they don't need to see it."

"It shouldn't matter. What should matter to you is what you want, and more importantly, what I want. And what I want right now is to kiss you, to feel that passion I fell in love with the first night we kissed. Show me it's still there, Louis."

"Of course it's still here."

"Shut up and show me."

"Jesus, fine!" Louis kissed him then, hard, the anger and frustration he'd been bottling up coming out in a tidal wave of lust that had him practically ripping Harry's hair out as he bent Harry's head to his will. Harry made no move to stop him, opening his mouth to receive the assault and giving it right back, not satisfied until Louis was gasping for breath and shaking with need.

Harry smiled as he gently pushed Louis back. "That's what I'm talking about. I knew you were still in there somewhere."

"I kiss you like that plenty when we're alone."

"But I like the side of you that loses yourself no matter where you are. I want you to be able to let go, to just focus on me. Stop worrying about saving everyone and focus on saving yourself."

Louis sighed, running a hand through his hair. "Jesus Christ, Harry. After a kiss like that, I'd damn well better get an overnight date with you."

Harry only smirked, standing and setting Louis on his feet. "I've got a few more people to talk to, and then it's time for the ceremony. Just remember what I said, okay? Make it all about me."

Rolling his eyes, Louis laughed nevertheless. " _There's_ the side of Harry Styles I knew before I came here."

"Never said I was perfect." With a wink, Harry headed back to the house, leaving Louis to feel the hostility now aimed at him from the few who had witnessed them going at it.

_Thanks a lot, Harry._

* * *

This time there was no hand-holding, not even between Niall and Louis, who stood next to each other. With Ryan, Liam, and Mike all off to the side, that left only six of them standing in a semi-circle on the steps to receive their fate. The pile of roses was tiny this time, and as Harry entered the room they were all thinking about how their numbers had dwindled—and would do so even more in a few brief minutes.

Harry smiled at each one in turn, though it was a hesitant smile. "Guys, this is by far the hardest thing I've ever done in my life. The longer this goes on, the more I get to know you, and the more it kills me to say goodbye. I'm sorry I can't keep all of you, I think there's a part of me that would if I could, but that wouldn't be fair to any of you. Let me say that I've enjoyed meeting each and every one of you, and I know that when you leave here, you'll make someone else very happy. It isn't that you're not the right kind of person, you're just not the right kind of person for _me_. And that's what I have to focus on, who is the person that will fit into what I want and what I need in a husband. But I love all of you dearly, and I'll miss those of you I'm saying goodbye to."

After taking a deep breath, Harry picked up the first of only three roses. "Niall."

Not at all surprised but flooded with relief anyway, Niall stepped forward to stand before Harry.

"Hi again," Harry whispered.

"Hello," Niall smiled.

"May I?"

"Of course."

His lips wouldn't relax as Harry fastened the rose, the smile fixed in place because he couldn't take his eyes off Harry. "Thank you," he said when it was done, fighting the urge to take Harry down to the ground and kiss him senseless and instead moving back into place among the other men.

Harry took a moment to compose himself, then picked up the second rose. He looked at each man in turn, finally saying, "Jerry."

Jerry grinned hugely, shuffling up to Harry, who smiled as he attached the rose to Jerry's lapel.

Now Niall was terrified. There was one rose left, and four guys who remained. Surely Louis hadn't screwed up again with Harry, had he? There hadn't been much time to ask, Liam had pounced on Louis when he'd returned from his talk with Harry. Glancing over at Liam, Niall saw that he too was petrified with fear, though in Liam's eyes it was more panic. They'd discussed what Louis would do if Liam was eliminated, but it had never really occurred to them that the opposite might happen instead—what would Liam do without Louis? Was this why Harry was so preoccupied tonight, because he knew he'd be breaking up the trio of best buddies?

The silence wreaked havoc on all of them, Harry seeming to be struggling with the last rose, and Niall reached out a hand for Louis'. Louis felt like a block of wood next to him, unmoving, but at the touch he clawed at Niall's hand, gripping it tight, and Niall at least knew he wasn't resigned. The movement caught Harry's eye, a brow lifting, and Niall wanted to kick himself—but he didn't let go.

"Louis."

Even Ryan and Mike let out huge sighs of relief when the word was spoken, and it was proof to Niall how much they had come to appreciate him as well. Louis didn't move right away, in shock, and when he did Niall dropped his hand.

"Louis, will you accept this rose?"

"Yes."

Harry fastened it, reaching out to stop Louis when he moved away. He pulled Louis close and kissed him, Louis allowing it because he knew Harry was testing him. When Harry stepped back, Louis spun on his heel and returned to the line, ignoring the glares from those who hadn't been chosen.

Chris appeared to instruct everyone to say their goodbyes, and after hugs all around Jared, Austin, and Max said goodbye to Harry as well, him making sure to hug each one tight and thank them for the pleasure of knowing them.

The mood lifted once they were gone, Chris calling the small group to order. "Congratulations, all of you. Next week you can prepare for two one-on-one dates—the group dates are done for the season-and two of you will go home at the end, leaving the final four who will of course bring Harry home to meet your families. The pressure intensifies at this point, so keep your heads and remember why you're here, but above all, get ready to have fun because we're finally heading out of the U.S."

Everyone cheered, Niall asking hopefully, "Are we going to Australia?"

"Enough with your Australia already!" Harry laughed, hugging him in with one arm. "I told you, it's not happening!"

"A guy can still dream. And so can an adorable little girl. If she was here, she'd turn her puppy dog eyes on you and then you'd be in trouble."

Harry grinned, Niall seeing in his eyes how badly Harry wanted to kiss him, and he hoped that one day Harry would no longer have to hold back.

"We're going to Rio," Chris informed them, and the room exploded with excitement.

"Oh, did we finally find a place Louis hasn't been to?" Liam joked, an arm around Louis' waist.

"Yes, Liam. We finally did." The fear no longer tearing apart his features, Louis grinned and slid an arm over Liam's shoulders.

"Next week will be a new adventure for all of us."


End file.
